Paul S

How it all began

This is dedicated to my father who, by using various psychological techniques, which he combined with a very long and careful process of training and manipulation; successfully made me addicted to cocksucking, to the exclusion of virtually all other forms of sexual activity.

My father, with professional help from a friend, began the indoctrination that has resulted in my becoming an enthusiastic homosexual when I was about four or five. We always took our bath together and I can recall him playing with my genitals when he washed me; he used to pull my foreskin well back saying that it was important to keep doing this so that I would not have any problems when I got older, of course at that age I had no idea what he was talking about! He always made a point of very thoroughly washing around my cock and behind my foreskin; and he would then carefully dry me paying particular attention to these areas. Over the years, I became quite used to him gently fondling my cock, and it became a regular feature that I used to enjoy, often getting an erection. My mother, always very prudish, never came into the bathroom and very rarely saw me naked after I was about four; she was quite happy to let my father bathe me every night before bed.

In those days we only had a small house, and whenever my father and mother had an argument she would go to sleep in my bed (which was in another room) and I would have to sleep with my father for the next three or four nights. This went on for many years, certainly until I was about thirteen or so; because my parents had what I would now describe as a very tempestuous relationship, and frequently had arguments that lasted for weeks! Whenever I shared my father's bed he always insisted that we both slept naked, no matter how cold it was; saying that we would have to 'cuddle up together' to get warm. I can still remember sometimes waking in the night, lovely and warm, to find him holding me tight against his body, and feeling something hard being pressed against my buttocks, whilst he gently rocked back and forth.

Another thing I remember is being in bed with my father, pretending to be asleep, whilst he held my right hand and used my fingers and thumb to play with his erect cock and, most particularly, to caress his knob. This happened on numerous occasions, sometimes I would be awake from the start, and sometimes I would wake up and find him using my hand to rub himself. I used to suck my right thumb in those days and I now realize that I was obviously sucking a thumb that had been covered with his pre-cum. I cannot say if he ever actually wanked himself off during these sessions because I was half asleep; but I do remember him sometimes rubbing something moist over my lips and I am now quite sure what that was! I did not say anything to him, or make him aware that I was awake and knew what was happening, because I was warm and snug in bed, and I saw nothing inappropriate with what he was doing. For me, as a young boy, my dad could do no wrong.

I now sometimes wonder if the frequent arguments my parents had were in fact instigated by my father; and that he actually prolonged them so that he could sleep with his young son rather than his wife.

Whenever I slept with him I obviously went to bed first. I can imagine that I must have been a very erotic sight when he came into the room to kiss me goodnight; seeing me lying in bed sucking my thumb, knowing that he would soon be using it to caress his knob. If I was not sucking it he would remind me to put it in my mouth before I went to sleep. Of course, this is why he said that there was nothing wrong with me sucking my thumb at any time, day or night; even whilst watching TV, and insisting that I should keep sucking it even when I was sixteen or seventeen. I now know that this is one way of developing an oral fixation in a child and even nowadays I sometimes wake to find my thumb in my mouth, and I still do enjoy sucking on it!

We moved to a larger house when I was about thirteen, which had a spare room, so unfortunately I could no longer sleep with my father when my parents had an argument, but I must admit that I really did miss sleeping with him.

Like all boys, I was an avid wanker in my youth, sometimes wanking two or three times a day, and then one day, by sheer chance (I thought!) I came across my father's stash of homoerotic books, which were a real eye opener for me! My father later told me that he had 'planted' his stash where he was sure I would find it. When he was certain that I had discovered it, he quickly made it more and more overtly homosexual in nature until it was totally homosexual, but always with the emphasis on cocksucking. He then introduced photographs of gorgeous naked guys with erections, guys wanking and then finally guys sucking cocks, but no anal sex was ever shown!

I was very naive young boy, and never realized this he was 'planting' all this porn just for me, because it was pure wanking material, and I eagerly read it, taking it all in and learning all sorts of things. Indeed, it was all new to me; cocksucking, deep throat, sixty-nine, cum swallowing, things I had never even dreamt about, and it was all so exciting! I had a permanent erection and could not wait to wank myself off at night. Of course I started experimenting, and one of the things that really interested me was what cum tasted like; all the porn I had read described the cocksucker swallowing the cum straight from the cock. The only cum available to me was my own, so I began catching it in a small empty glass that was on my bedside table. Really curious, I started drinking it, found that I liked it and, as you can imagine, it soon became a regular feature of my wanking. It did not seem odd at the time, but now I remember that every night, as I got into bed, my father placed a small clean shot glass on my bedside table. He never did tell me, but I now wonder if he had a spy hole somewhere, so that he could watch me wank. How else did he know about the shot glass? Not only that, he used to remove the glass (which I always licked clean) when he came in later to turn my light out and kiss me good night! Sometimes the kiss would be just a peck on the cheek, other times it would be a full kiss on the lips that lasted several moments.

I can imagine my father smiling to himself as he added more and more explicitly homosexual material to his stash, knowing that I was going to bed early so that I could wank myself silly whilst looking it! He even bought me a video player for my bedroom, and as time went by, videos began to appear in his stash always showing guys avidly sucking each others cocks and swallowing the cum, and I thought these were really super. For me, adult sex really just consisted of cocksucking, nothing else. It was all a subtle but very effective form of indoctrination and behavior modification; and my father knew that if he continued this throughout my youth he would gradually transform me into a fervent homo who would have no interest in females.

From my father's point of view it all came to fruition when I was just about fourteen, and had been under the influence of his 'behavior modification' technique for a long time! My parents always did their own thing, and every Friday evening my mother used to go off to a club that she had joined; and I had taken to having a leisurely bath alone in the house with my father who would be watching TV. I had developed a very spotty back and can remember asking my father if he would wash my back to help get rid of the spots. Well, it all started off very innocently – I would call out when I was ready and he would come into the bathroom and wash my back, rinse it off and leave straight away. I would be sitting in the bath with my back to him and it was all very normal – just a father washing his sons spotty back. Occasionally he would pretend (I now realise) to lose the soap after it had 'accidentally' slipped out of his hand, and he would feel for it in the water around my bottom and between my legs. Of course I would soon be erect and he would fondle my genitals as he searched in the water for the soap. For the next few weeks' things carried on as normal on a Friday evening, with my mother going out to her club and me getting my back washed in the bath.

About this time I developed a hatred (which I still have) of my new pubic hair and would use my father's razor to shave it off, much preferring the smooth hairless look. However, one Friday evening my father came into the bathroom unexpectedly and caught me standing in the bath shaving my erect cock. I quickly sat down in the water and my father told me that he did not mind me shaving, in fact he preferred my shaven look, but I should take care not cut myself in what was a very sensitive place. He then proceeded to wash my back as normal; he did not mention my erection, but I'm sure that he decided to come into the bathroom before I called him because he had hoped to find me wanking myself off. Not long after that he provided me with my own shaving gear which was obviously for my pubic hair, because at that time I had no real facial hair.

I believe that because of my father's indoctrination I have also become an exhibitionist. I now realise that I must have subconsciously been turned on by all this, because I can distinctly remember making sure that the next time I called my father to wash my back, I was again standing in the bath with a very hard erection that he could not help seeing! I pretended to be caught unawares and quickly sat down, and he then washed my back; as usual occasional losing the soap and having to search around in the water to find it. After that I would often be standing in the bath, wanking, when he came in. I would quickly sit down and act as if it was an accident; but I knew that he had seen me playing with my cock. Obviously my fathers training was working and I remember later looking at the homosexual porn, shaking with excitement, as I wanked myself.

I suppose I was partly to blame for what happened next, because by now I was getting very turned on by these bathtime events, and used to lie in bed wanking, thinking about them. To be honest I really had no idea what I was letting myself in for, but it did seem fun at the time and played on my newly emerging exhibitionist streak. No one else, apart from my father, had ever seen my erect cock. So one Friday I made sure that I had an erection and then lowered the water in the bath so that my knob and half my cock protruded well out of the water when I was sitting down then, my heart beating loudly, I called for my father to come and wash my back. Well, he came into the bathroom and proceeded to wash my back as normal and obviously could not help but see my knob protruding from the water.

The next thing he did took me completely by surprise, because he reached down into the water, grasped my erect cock and said 'Do you want me to wank this?' Without waiting for an answer, he pushed my foreskin down to expose my knob, and began stroking the whole length of my cock with a slippery, soapy wet hand! I was just beginning to really enjoy it when he stopped and asked me to stand up.

So there I was – standing in the bath in front of my father with my hard cock almost vertical when, without warning, he suddenly bent down, took my exposed knob in his mouth and started to suck. I cannot describe the overwhelming feeling! My first ever blow job. It was marvelous and something that I had never experienced before and, at that young age, had only ever seen or read about in my father's collection of pornography. What happened next was even more startling, because after a few minutes, my father turned away, took out his false teeth, turned back and started to suck my cock again.

This was amazing, the most superb feeling. His warm, wet mouth sucking on my cock whilst he used his lips, gums and tongue on my knob, it was so good that I came almost instantly!! He continued to suck throughout, holding onto my hips to keep my cock in his mouth, swallowing down all my semen, in fact having to swallow several times because of the copious amount. He finished me off by holding my knob in his mouth and gently sucking out the last of my cum until he had completely drained me; he then let go of my hips, put his dentures back in and asked me if I had enjoyed having my cock sucked. Enjoyed it! I was over the moon – it was wonderful!! I was weak at the knees and my heart was pounding. I could not get enough, I was an addict! Well, from that point on and for many years after, every Friday night after my bath I would sit in an armchair, completely nude, my pubes freshly shaven, with my father kneeling between my legs, having my cock leisurely sucked by his wet toothless mouth. My semen would be avidly swallowed every time – I used to cum what seemed to me to be gallons, but my father always swallowed it with gusto – sometimes noisily slurping it down because there was so much. Over the years he got even better at sucking my cock, taking it deep into his mouth and developing his technique to make it an even more wonderful experience for me. Like most boys of that age I was a semen producing factory just looking for somewhere to make a deposit, and my father was always ready to receive my prodigious weekly production, swallowing it all.

My father and I both eagerly looked forward to our Friday nights together; and we quickly established a routine that varied little, and lasted for many years after. I was only fourteen, but once I realized that I had a regular weekly date with my father's mouth I immediately stopped wanking in the week and saved all my semen for the Friday night. Friday nights, Oh Joy! How I looked forward to the Friday night cocksucking sessions! As soon as my mother left the house I would jump in the bath and wash, whilst my father prepared my bedroom. The lights would be turned right down, the heating turned up, and a pillow would be placed on the floor in front of the 'special' armchair that my father had acquired, and which was only to be used when he sucked me off. It was quite a low chair with a sloping back and a headrest; most unusually, it also had two padded extensions that my father added which could be put in place to raise my legs high in the air. With my erect cock bobbing in front of me, precum dripping from the end, I would walk into the darkened room, heart beating loudly, and arrange myself in the armchair. I would sometimes lie for two or three hours in that lovely warm comfy armchair; legs spread high and wide, my father kneeling between them with my cock in his mouth. No outside distractions, no noise and no other feelings apart from my cock in his mouth, just concentrating on the sensations from my cock; which was being gobbled and sucked and nearly brought to orgasm time and time again, until finally he would let me explode into his mouth. I remember that, as a young boy, I used to shoot my cum out in very, very strong spurts and on some occasions he would choke when it hit the back of his throat but he still gulped it down. After every marathon cocksucking session I would be exhausted, completely wiped out. Staggering out of the chair, I would stumble across the room to my bed, my father would tuck me in, give me a wet kiss on the lips, say goodnight, and I would be asleep in minutes.

The following evening I would of course be erect as he was bathing me, and as he washed my cock he would ask me if I had enjoyed having it sucked, and did I want him to do it again. You can imagine, I was now an addict, so of course I always said yes, and he would then give my hard cock a gentle massage. Great, I would think, my cock was going to be sucked again next Friday! If my mother did not go out to her club for some reason it was terrible for me – all that pent up semen with nowhere to go. Fortunately this did not happen very often, but when it did I had no option other than wanking into the same little cum collecting glass that would somehow materialize on my bedside table, and then swallowing my own cum when I had finished. Whilst this was ok, it was definitely not the same as being sucked off, and I sometimes waited until the following Friday, when my father would get a massive load of semen. Only once did he find it impossible to swallow it all (he had to spit some into the basin), and I distinctly remember that he apologized to me and said that he was sorry for not swallowing all of my cum. He soon resolved this little problem by giving me deep throat as I came so that my semen spurted straight down his throat. This was just fantastic, the combination of deep throat with a wet toothless mouth on my young inexperienced cock meant that I had no need to find sex with boys (or girls) because I was literally sucked dry of cum once a week by my father.

My father never asked me to suck his cock, and being a self-centred young lad I was only interested in getting my cock sucked by his wonderful toothless mouth, so I never offered. Sometime later, as part of my training, he bought me an expensive dildoe to practice my cocksucking on, and showed me one or two important techniques that he had used whilst sucking my cock. When I did suck my first cock I really liked it, and since then I've sucked many. I've always enjoyed being an eater, swallowing the semen just like my father. I remember coming home after the first time and telling him that I had just sucked off a real cock, and him laughing and congratulating me. At one point, when I was in my late twenties, my father persuaded me to have my teeth extracted so that I could suck cock just like him, but unfortunately I could not find a dentist willing to extract my healthy teeth. My father thought that maybe they could just remove my front teeth but none would, so I still have them. I do not believe that a female can give a proper blowjob – it takes a man to suck cock because only a man knows what a cock likes! The two girls that have sucked my cock had no enthusiasm and none would swallow my cum; my father used this to convince me about the benefits of being a homosexual. Anyway, girls never really stood a chance when compared to my father who was always ready to suck me off, so I soon gave up trying with them. I have had many blow jobs from different guys over the years and they have been ok, but none of them had the same cocksucking skills of my father.

Unfortunately, because of the Aids problem, I do not get to suck cock very often now, and I would love to find one to suck on a regular basis. I now wish that I too had a son that I could seduce, and train to enjoy having his cock sucked, just like my father did with me. I still always swallow my cum when I wank, and I know my father would approve if he were still alive.

I now realise how lucky I was to have experienced the superb toothless cock sucking of my father and wish that I had offered to suck his cock, it could have been good fun, maybe even leading to us doing 69 together. I often saw his cock erect – it was quite large – with a long foreskin, but he obviously just wanted to suck me off and never asked me to even touch him let alone suck him. I do not know if I would have been able to swallow his semen – after all it was where I originated from and was already part of me. But who knows, at the height of sucking on his ejaculating cock it might never have entered my head; and I would have swallowed his cum without giving it a second thought! I will never know. From what he told me over the years, I gather that after I was born he never again had sex with my mother; and it transpired that the only reason he married her was so that he could have a son to raise as his homosexual companion. He said that a homosexual friend called John, who was a child psychologist, advised him on the correct methods and procedures to use when indoctrinating me. He apparently told my father that the best time to start my training would be when I was four or five, when I would be at my most impressionable. Every six or eight weeks my father and I used to visit Uncle John (as I called him), and he did an assessment of my progress, and then advised my father what the next step in my training should be. It was only when I was a lot older that I found out why we visited him.

Uncle John had advised my father that an important part of my indoctrination was to be the daily bath, when my father would have unfettered access to my genitals, and I would become used to him playing with them. Another thing was to encourage me to be an exhibitionist, making me walk about naked as often as possible. He was also to tell me not to be shy about having erections. In fact my father was to instigate and promote my erections by casually fondling me whenever possible. Uncle Ben also told my father that by the age of fifteen or so, if my training was successful, I would get spontaneous erections whenever I was nude with him; and this transpired to be the case. Indeed, as soon as my father started to undress me for my bath I would become erect; he did not even have to touch me! We would be naked together for most of the evening, me with my stiff cock bobbing up and down, and only occasionally would he have to fondle me to keep it erect.

I remember that when I was about seventeen we were visiting Uncle John for my periodic assessment; when he told my father that if he continued with my training I would eventually only be able to get erections when I was with him. I sat there amazed, could that be true? Uncle John assured me that it was, it just depended upon what my father wanted. Apparently, I was a good subject for manipulation and training, and highly responsive to my father's indoctrination. Well, fortunately for me, my father decided that he wanted me to get erections with other men so we never went down that road. Obviously my father did not want my mother to know what he was doing, so as soon as we started having our evening bath together, he banned her from the bathroom. My mother did not object, indeed she was quite grateful, because she was always very straitlaced; she had absolutely refused to breastfed me and had no interest in me from the moment I was born.

My father told me that it had been important to proceed very slowly, so that I would have no idea that he was manipulating me. The indoctrination had to be pleasurable for me, something I would look forward to, and believe me; he knew how to play upon my developing sexuality. The gradual introduction to homosexual porn (to the exclusion of any other) was another important stage. That was why it was vital that I stumbled across his 'stash' of porn by myself, and did not realise that he was monitoring what I was reading. I was never allowed to see heterosexual porn and, as far as possible, he kept me isolated from young females throughout my youth. He said that one way or another he would have found a way to introduce me to cocksucking, and that he knew that once he had sucked me off I would be led by my cock, and turned into a very willing partner. He was quite correct, not once did I turn him down when he offered to suck my cock. I do not believe that any virile young lad could have resisted his superb toothless cocksucking; and like me, would always have gone back for more. With Uncle Johns help, my father has been very successful in raising me as a homosexual addicted to cocksucking; I cannot imagine having sex with a woman, indeed, I'm sure I would not be able to get an erection.

I have traveled the world and also read extensively about the ancient Greek, Egyptian, Roman and Arab cultures; and I now believe that through the ages it has not been at all unusual for fathers to introduce their sons to the pleasures of cocksucking; and that this was often a young boy's first introduction to sex. Of course homosexual cocksucking, together with homosexual anal sex, has the added benefit of avoiding unwanted pregnancies, whilst enabling a father and son to obtain sexual gratification and relief together. Thus in past times heterosexual intercourse was only practiced if additional children were desired. Being a homosexual may well have saved many a young man from the possibility of being forced into heterosexual marriage when a female became pregnant. The added advantage was that by turning young men into confirmed homosexuals it had a limiting effect on the population increase. It raises the question, should there be more homosexuals in today's overpopulated world?

The End