"They say that Greed is one of the Seven Deadly Sins. Consider the truth of that saying in the story of a young, newlywed couple..."
"Honey, did you order something? There was a box on the front porch with your name on it."
"Nope. Who's it from?"
"There's no return address, not even a postmark."
"Let me have it, and we'll see what it is."
He gave her the mysterious parcel. She tore it open, and inside, found a box, and a note. The note said:
You have been selected as the recipient of an Orgasmirator 9000. This is a new, technologically advanced vibrator and massager, that will bring you orgasms with an intensity you have never experienced. Every orgasm will harder, longer, and more intense than the last. The catch is that every time you come, you will take five years off the lifespan of someone you don't know."Don't open it!" he shouted. "Put it down. Let's just throw it out. That's awful. Who would send such a thing?"Enjoy
"Calm down, calm down. I'm sure it's just a joke. One of our neighbors is messing with you, or..."
"A joke?! I don't think so."
"Oh, why must you always be so uptight? I'm gonna open it."
"Wait! Don't..." he demanded, but it was too late. She had opened the box. Inside was a fairly ordinary looking vibrator. It certainly didn't look like an Orgasmirator 9000, whatever that was.
She turned it on. It buzzed, quietly, in her hand. It didn't sound all that different from the vibrators she kept in her bedside table. She moved it towards her...
"Give it back!" she ordered. "I was just gonna try it out. Just once."
"No. I am not having this in our house." He took it out and tossed it in the trash, and wheeled the trash can out to the road. "The garbage men can take it to the dump in the morning, and that will be that."
The following morning, he waited until he saw the garbage truck come by, and take their trash, before he left for work. "That's the end of that," he thought.
When he returned from work, his wife seemed a bit strange to him. A weird mixture of exhilirated and subdued. Of course, they had been married for less than three months, so he was still learning her moods.
"Are you all right, hon?" he asked.
"Oh, I'm fine, just fine." He didn't believe her, but had no reason to press the issue, so he let it go.
That night, they had terrific sex. She was a tiger in the bed, and threw him down so she could have her way with him. He liked it, and decided that whatever might be bothering her wasn't all that important.
She sucked his cock, for the first time since they had been married. Not only did she suck it, she sucked it well, giving it the same kind of attention that a car salesman gives a customer who says "Of course I want the invisible pollution inhibitor. I want it all!" In short, she was insatiable.
After sucking him (for over fifteen minutes) to a mind-blowing orgasm, she quickly had him hard again. When he fucked her, she came almost immediately. Every thrust seemed to make her come again.
She was a woman in the throes of a great sexual high, and he was going to enjoy this wave while it lasted. They fucked until about three a.m., and only stopped because he had to get some sleep, or he would never make it to work the next day. She was insatiable.
The next morning, there was none of the tension that hung over the previous day's breakfast. "See, hon, you didn't need that vibrator whatsit to have great sex."
She smiled back at him. "You were right. Have a great day, love, and hurry home!" She gave him her best "come-hither" look.
"You betcha!"
When he returned home that night, his wife was visibly shaken, and most definitely not the sex-kitten he was expecting to return home to.
"Okay, hon, what's wrong?" he asked.
"Well, you remember that you threw out that vibrator? Well, I went out to bring the trash can back to the house yesterday, and it was still in the bottom. I couldn't help it. I fished it out, and washed it off. Then I used it on myself yesterday afternoon. It was unbelievable. I came so hard I was sure that area seismologists would be reporting unexplained earth tremors, centered on our house. That's why I was such a wild woman last night. The sexual high the Orgasmirator left me with clearly carried me all through the night."
"Dammit, I told you not to mess with it."
"Yeah, well, nothing bad happened yesterday, so I figured it was a hoax. So right after you left for work today, I dug it out, and played with it again. I came even harder than the day before. I used it again, and again, and again. All day long! I was a sexual mad-woman. But then..."
"What?"
"It stopped working sometime this afternoon. I tried, and tried, but it just wouldn't vibrate any more. So I went to sneak it back out to the trash, so you wouldn't know I had been messing with it. When I came back to the door, I found a note on the front porch. Look."
She handed him a small square of paper, which read:
Thank you for using the Orgasmirator 9000. We hope you enjoyed it. it will now be taken, and given to somebody you don't know.
"And thus does Greed prove itself once again to be one of the Seven Deadly Sins."
"But of course, they are called the Seven Deadly Sins because there are seven. Now let us consider a story of Wrath, and a young man caught up in events beyond his control..."
This half has yet to be written.