--5:06--

EINSTEIN: Hey, kids! What time is it? (sounder: "It's Einstein time!") That's right! And if you missed the first two hours, you missed a lot. We had a spelling bee wom by a fourteen-year-old girl.

VICKI HUBERT: Yeah, but weren't a lot of the words easy?

JAY HART: I didn't think so.

CHRIS COOPER: It looked hard because you know that one girl kept missing.

EINSTEIN: Yeah, and she was one of the ones that got naked.

JAY: Well, Katherine was naked, too.

EINSTEIN: Yeah, but that was after it was over. And for all, I know, maybe she was trying to impress Dylan.

STACI DYLAN aka DYLAN: Well, I did get to feel her boobs.

EINSTEIN: All the crazies are here: Jay Hart, Chris Cooper, Vicki Hubert, and Dylan the Resident Lesbian. And then you missed Ariel Winter of Modern Family. And she and Dylan got into a little something on the couch over there.

DYLAN: Yeah, but you know I won't let you see my tummy.

EINSTEIN: Oh, that's why you pulled your shirt back down. Ariel was trying to get it up so we could see.

DYLAN: It wouldn't do you any good, wouldn't it? I mean, you don't get off on women who are lezzies, do you?

EINSTEIN: I don't. But some other guys might be that way.

JAY: Does anyone know why Dylan gets more action around here than we do?

EINSTEIN: I don't know but I think I know how we can fix that. We have a twelve-year-old girl coming in because she wants to be in Playdate magazine. So, when Mikey D booked her, he also got Rachel Mariano from Playdate to come in and evaulate. So welcome, Rachel.

RACHEL MARIANO, PLAYDATE MAGAZINE: Thanks for letting us come back.

EINSTEIN: Now, you've been here a couple of times. Your dad, Ted, is the guy who founded and runs the magazine. I guess that makes him the Hugh Hefner of the younger set.

RACHEL: Yep!

EINSTEIN: He's been here the last few times we've done evaluations. I guess either one of you can come while the other one watches the office with Mom?

RACHEL: Yeah. My mom own and runs the boys magazine for Playdate Publications. So, she stays at the office in Chicago and picks out the peckers.

EINSTEIN: Being the girl, but also being Ted's daughter, do you work both sides?

RACHEL: Yeah, I'll get to test a couple of girls a month. I work more with boys. You know, sucking their dicks and letting them fuck me.

EINSTEIN: When you test girls, do you play with their pussies?

RACHEL: Yeah, I'll lick their pussies and try to put as many fingers in there as I can. But with you, and Jay, and Chris, I won't need to do that.

EINSTEIN: Yeah, because we're going to give her a workout.

JAY: Hell, yeah!

CHRIS: Bring her to Daddy!

DYLAN: Hey, Rachel, don't forget I'm here. I might wanna play with her pussy.

RACHEL: You got a point.

EINSTEIN: Yeah, don't let the fact that she's a girl throw ya. She's just as girl crazy as the rest of us.

DYLAN: Yeah, except you're the only one of us who's married.

EINSTEIN: So, my wife knows what I do. She knows girls come in and take their clothes off. I already told you we were going to The Clubhouse tonight.

JAY: Right.

EINSTEIN: And for those who don't live here, that's an underage strip bar in New York City. So, once they reach eighteen, then they have to go to Scores or The Bada Bing to keep stripping. Anyway, we're about to ge way off track here. Mikey D, bring in the girl.

Mikey D, the producer, brings in a twelve-year-old blue-eyed brunette and her mother. She attends Catholic school and has on her uniform, which is a white button shirt and a blue skirt.

MIKE DANIELS aka MIKEY D: Here she is!

EINSTEIN: Wow! Sexy Catholic school girl!

Mikey D pulls down the boom mike so we can hear them.

EINSTEIN: So what's your name?

MOLLY WARD: I'm Molly!

EINSTEIN: Well, Molly, it's nice to meet you.

MOLLY: Nice to meet you, Einstein. I'm a big fan.

EINSTEIN: Thank you. And I see you brought your mom in.

DONNA WARD: Hi, I'm Donna.

EINSTEIN: Donna, nice to meet you, too. You look smokin' hot as well.

DONNA: Well, thank you.

EINSTEIN: Okay, so Rachel's here and she's got a camera. She's going to take pictures, and we're going to put you through a typical tryout for Playdate. So, is that okay with you?

MOLLY: Oh yeah! I mean, that's why we're here.

EINSTEIN: That's true. So, Rachel, if you will start with the pictures.

Rachel gets up and starts taking pictures. Molly does various poses.

EINSTEIN: Alright, how about unbuttoning your shirt all the way. Let's see how it looks.

Molly starts at the bottom unbuttoning her shirt and goes all the way up. She has a white bra on underneath.

JAY: Nice stomach!

CHRIS: Love the belly.

EINSTEIN: Wow, that looks like a great body there, Molly. Rachel, what do you think so far?

RACHEL: So far, she's perfect. Okay, go ahead and take off the blouse.

Molly removes her blouse as Rachel continues to take pictures

EINSTEIN: Nice! So, Donna, she comes to you and says she wants to do nudie magazines. What was your reaction?

DONNA: I didn't think it was a good idea. I still don't think it's a good idea. But it's something she wants to try, so I'm going to let her.

EINSTEIN: Has she always been like this?

DONNA: Well, she has older brothers who are Playdate fans. She's always catching them looking at the pictures. In fact, she saw the pictures of Ariel in the magazine.

EINSTEIN: Aha! And thought it might be worth a try.

DONNA: Yep.

EINSTEIN: Is she normally naked around the house?

DONNA: Oh, no. Never. Her dad and I would never stand for it.

RACHEL: Okay, slip off your skirt.

MOLLY: Okay.

Molly reaches behind and unzips her skirt. It falls to the floor. She has white panties on to match her white bra.

EINSTEIN: Oh, beautiful! Outstanding.

JAY: She gets hotter as she keeps going.

EINSTEIN: You got that right. Anyway, I have to jump in here because we got to take a break. We'll be back with more from Rachel Mariano of Playdate and Molly trying out for the magazine on "The Einstein Show".

--5:21--

EINSTEIN: Back with Rachel Mariano, who is one of the people behind Playdate magazine, and Molly, a twelve-year-old who wants to be in the magazine. Her mother,

Donna, is here with her. Now, Rachel, how many girls try out for Playdate?

RACHEL: We have about 5,000 submissions come in every year. And we see about 800-1000 more on various casting calls around the country.

EINSTEIN: So, in other words, plenty of girls are coming to see you.

RACHEL: Oh, absolutely. I think you know we have more girls than space allows for in the magazine. That's why we have our Special Editions and the Cyber Club. Because we don't have room for all of them. But those that make the magazine, or Special Editions, or the Cyber Club can expect a fair amount of work and good pay. Even if you never become a Playdate of the Month, you can make a good living posing for us. And that's why the girls do it.

EINSTEIN: And that's why Molly is here. Now for those of you who aren't seeing this live, why aren't you? Like I said, she's a brunette, shoulder length hair, beautiful blue eyes.

You're about how tall, Molly?

MOLLY: I don't know.

DONNA: She's about four-foot-seven.

EINSTEIN: So she's four-foot-seven and has a nice build. When last we left her, she was wearing a white bra and panties.

RACHEL: We did. But I know there's something you'd love to see.

EINSTEIN: Oooh, might it be that ass?

RACHEL: I think Molly should turn around and show you that ass.

Molly turns around and shows her panty clad bottom for the studio camera. Rachel takes some pictures of it.

RACHEL: Okay, Molly slowly pull it down past the ass and stop. Don't pull it all the way down.

Molly slowly pulls down her panties down. Rachel takes several pictures with varying amounts of skin and crack.

EINSTEIN: Oh, fuck! Check out that ass! Perfectly round globes.

JAY: Aw, man! I wanna play! I wanna play!

EINSTEIN: Well, you're gonna have to wait. I mean this is going in an orderly fashion. So just wait. Our turn is coming.

RACHEL: Okay, pull it up and face me again.

Molly pulls her underwear up and turns around to face Rachel.

RACHEL: Hey, Einstein, would you like boobies or pussy next?

EINSTEIN: I think it's time to free the puppies.

DYLAN: I wanna see the puppies!

CHRIS: Me, too! Or is it me, three?

RACHEL: You heard them, Molly. Go ahead and take the bra off.

Molly reaches behind her and unclasps the bra. She brings the straps forward and pulls the bra off, showing her A cup breasts.

EINSTEIN: Now that's a good set of boobs.

JAY: Kinda small.

EINSTEIN: Maybe, but what kind of boobs did you have at twelve? Huh?

JAY: None.

EINSTEIN: Exactly! See, you don't know what you're talking about. Get plenty of the boobs, Rachel.

RACHEL: Oh, I sure am!

Rachel takes plenty of pictures of Molly's boobs.

EINSTEIN: We got to take a break for news. Many of you will get an update on the Oklahoma tornados. It doesn't sound promising. And we want to say our thoughts and hearts are with the people there in the tornado ravaged areas. We're just getting started with Molly. We'll be back after this on "The Einstein Show".

--5:34--

EINSTEIN: Back on "The Einstein Show". We have Rachel Mariano from Playdate here along with her latest test subject, Molly, who's twelve years old. And if you can see this on the internet or on your phone, she's just in her white cotton panties. But you know what I think, Rachel?

RACHEL: What's that?

EINSTEIN: I think it's time for them to come off. What do you say?

RACHEL: Oh, I definitely say so, too. Go ahead and slip them panties off.

MOLLY: Fully naked?

RACHEL: Fully naked.

DONNA: Oh boy.

Molly lowers her panties and steps out of them. There's a tiny hint of brown pubic hair over her slit. Fanfare plays.

EINSTEIN: And Molly's now fully naked. I think you're going to get some pictures from different angles there, Rachel?

RACHEL: Yep, she'll slowly turn around and we'll get some full lengths and three-quarter lengths. You'll get to see her pussy and her ass.

Rachel continues to take pictures of Molly as Einstein and the crew continue.

EINSTEIN: So, Donna, when was the last time you saw Molly naked.

DONNA: Probably when she was four or five and I gave her a bath.

EINSTEIN: Was she just this beautiful then.

DONNA: Oh yes!

EINSTEIN: I know you have reservations, but what do you think so far?

DONNA: So far, it's okay.

EINSTEIN: So Molly is totally naked and Rachel is getting some pictures in.

MOLLY: I need to pee.

RACHEL: Oh, don't worry, Molly. We got it covered. Einstein, she says she needs to pee.

EINSTEIN: We got a little plastic see-through bucket she can use. See, we come prepared. Jay, put that down in front of her. Okay, Molly, squat down so that you're just above the opening.

MOLLY: Okay.

EINSTEIN: I think your all set. Rachel can you see everything good?

DONNA: Wait, she's going to the bathroom there?

EINSTEIN: Yeah. Don't worry, Donna, it's okay. Besides it's part of the test.

DONNA: Okay.

RACHEL: I got it. Go, Molly.

Mikey D. points a mike at the bucket. Molly pees and it can clearly be heard on the broadcast.

EINSTEIN: Molly's taking a leak, right on our air. Donna's covering her ears. I don't know why because it's a nice little sound.

Molly finishes peeing.

EINSTEIN: Okay, which one of you wants to take the bucket.

MIKEY D: I'll get it, Einstein.

Mikey D picks up the bucket and leaves

EINSTEIN: Wonder if he'll smell it on the way there.

DYLAN: Yeah.

JAY: Yeah, because he can't get any himself.

EINSTEIN: What do you mean he can't get any? He works for me! He can get it!

RACHEL: Okay, Molly, you'll need a partner for the next part. Do you have a preference?

MOLLY: No.

RACHEL: Okay, which one of you guys would like to come over here?

EINSTEIN: I think they both would. But I know it's Jay's turn. I actually keep track of such things.

DONNA: What's he gonna do?

DYLAN: Actually, she's going to suck his dick.

DONNA: Oh my God! His big dick in my girl's small mouth.

DYLAN: I think she can get it all in.

Mikey D returns to watch.

RACHEL: Okay, Jay, go ahead and drop your pants and underwear.

Jay complies. His dick has become very hard over today's events.

MOLLY: Oh wow! It's big!

JAY: Thank you!

RACHEL: Okay, Molly, what I want you to do is get on your knees, grab a hold of his penis, and put it in your mouth.

DYLAN: Told ya!

Molly follows Rachel's request and puts Jay's penis in her mouth. She begins to suck on it.

EINSTEIN: So Jay is now getting a blow job from Molly, right here in the studio. What is Chris doing.

MIKEY D: He's getting a condom out.

EINSTEIN: Uh oh. I know where this is going.

DONNA: Should I ask?

DYLAN: It's probably better off that you didn't.

Chris takes his pants and underwear off, freeing his seven-inch rod. He puts a condom on and manouevers Molly into a doggy position.

EINSTEIN: This is getting crazy. It's about to be two on one. Chris is about to stick it in from behind.

Chris slips his penis into Molly's vagina from behind and begins pumping. Molly continues to suck on Jay's penis.

EINSTEIN: Like I said, now it's two on one. And the bad news is I got to take a break. Back with more hedonism on "The Einstein Show" after this.

--5:50--

EINSTEIN: Back on "The Einstein Show". It's kind of crazy in here. Jay and Chris are still working on Molly. Rachel is still taking pictures. And there's a horrified mother in here.

DONNA: Well, I can't believe they would do that to my daughter.

EINSTEIN: Well, again, it's all part of the test.

DONNA: Sounds really sick to me to make them have sex for a shoot.

DYLAN: Well, are you upset because she's having sex with them, or because you're not getting any?

DONNA: Both.

DYLAN: Oh then, come over here.

EINSTEIN: What are you two doing?

Dylan and Donna sit on the couch and start kissing.

EINSTEIN: Wow! I think I've lost control of the studio. I also feel like I'm the only one not gettin' any.

VICKI: Well, I ain't gettin' any either.

MIKEY D: And I'm not getting any.

Dylan pushes Donna on the couch. Jay and Chris switch places. Chris is now getting his dick sucked and Jay is working Molly doggystyle.

VICKI: This is just unreal. What the fuck is going on in here?

EINSTEIN: Must be a full moon. Gotta be a full moon.

VICKI: Not at fucking six o'clock.

MIKEY D: Well, Einstein, how many girls have we had in today?

EINSTEIN: We had five naked girls.

MIKEY D: There's the answer. With all the sexual tension built up, it was released right near the end of the show.

Dylan reaches inside Donna's skirt and pulls off her underwear. She puts her head inside and starts licking the woman's pussy.

EINSTEIN: Holy shit, there goes Dylan. She's getting herself some pussy from Molly's mom. I got to take a break and try and get control in here. Back with more on "The Einstein Show".

--5:57--

EINSTEIN: Back with the last few minutes of "The Einstein Show". Things have finally calmed down in here. Rachel Mariano took many pictures of the sexual melee. First off, is that the craziest thing you've ever seen?

RACHEL: Certainly one of the craziest things I've ever seen.

EINSTEIN: We thank you for coming in. Molly, I hope the pictures turn out well. I'm pretty sure they will. I think we'll see you as a regular Playdate model soon.

MOLLY: Thanks, Einstein!

EINSTEIN: And Donna, I gotta apologize for Dylan the Resident Lesbian.

DONNA: Oh you don't need to. She was great.

EINSTEIN: Thank you for bringing Molly and coming in. It's really not usually like this. For Chris, Jay, Dylan, Vicki, and Mikey D, it's Einstein. We gotta go. Have a great evening. We'll see you again tomorrow!