The next day, at around 10, I got a message on my new, fake, Facebook account. The message was from the only friend the account had, and it said simply, "I'm coming over now."

I'd been nervous on and off since Lily left my apartment last, but it returned with a vengeance upon reading that. I'm usually pretty calm about things, but if something was about to happen that you wanted incredibly badly, and it was also quite likely to fuck up your entire life, I don't think you'd do much better. I paced around my apartment, cleaning up things that had already been cleaned, checking and re-checking the fridge (I'd bought a variety or refreshments for before or after... it only seemed polite), and looking out the windows, wary of police cars.

When the phone rang, I nearly jumped. "Hello?" I said cautiously into the receiver.

"It's me." It was Lily's voice, a little tinny in the way that I'd become familiar with... it meant somebody was calling from the vestibule. I pressed the number to buzz her up, and then waited another agonizing three minutes until there was a soft knock at my door.

There she was in the hallway. Unlike the last few times I'd seen her, she wasn't dressed in her school uniform. What she wore today was far more casual, a pink shirt tucked into a pair of jeans, and the ear buds of a music player tucked into her ears. She smiled and waved at me as soon as the door opened, and shut the music off. I let her in and we had that moment of silence again, before I said, "So, do you want something to drink or something?"

"I don't know," she said. "Maybe. What do you got?"

I opened the fridge and she leaned down beside me to look, before grabbing a bottle of fruit punch. "Ooh, my favorite." At least I'd done something right.

"So, um, where does your mother think you are?"

"My friend Cindy's. You met her the other day." I wondered idly which of the girls I'd met on Wednesday flashed on ChatRoulette. "She lives three doors down. Mom wouldn't let me walk if it was any farther, even though I go farther than that to school." Lily popped the top off the juice and took a swig.

"She's not liable to drop in and check, is she?"

"No, she's feeling another migraine coming so she went to go get a massage. Besides, they're not even home. I told her Cindy's mom was taking us to the mall, that should cover us."

"And what about your dad? Is he going to be worried?"

Lily shrugged. "Working." That's all she said, but she turned towards couch bed. "Shouldn't this be unfolded?" she suggested.

"Yeah, I guess." I pulled the cushions off, threw them aside, and pulled out the bed while Lily watched with a detached interest, sipping fruit punch.

When I was done, so was she, and she held the bottle out at arm's length. "Somewhere I should put this?"

"Yeah," I said, and took it from her, stepped into the little kitchen area, rinsed out the remainder, then deposited it in the little recycling bin near the door. I guess to some degree I was stalling, trying to put off the inevitable moment.

When I next turned around to look at Lily, her pants were down to her knees. Her shirt was already off, and if she had a bra on, it was long gone as well. She still wore a tiny pair of yellow panties, and a few animal-shaped rubber bands around one wrist, but that was all she had above her knee.

"That was fast," I said, far more calmly than I felt.

She grinned at me as she pulled one leg free from the jeans, then the other. "I've gotten good at stripping down and dressing really fast," she said. "But it's fun being naked. If I had my own place, I'd be naked all the time. Or almost naked, anyway. Maybe just panties so I still have something to tease with." She put her hand on her hips, then hooked her thumbs under the waistband, like she was ready to pull them down too. Instead, though, she tugged slightly upward on them, stretching them over her mound and giving her a little bit of a camel toe. "Do you like them?"

My throat was feeling suddenly dry. "Yeah."

"So we're going to need music, I guess. Do you mind if I use mine?" I shook my head numbly, and she bent down to her clothes pile to retrieve her mp3 player and went to my speakers.

With a confidence that must have come from experience, she stared hooking it up to play through my sound system. For a moment, the crazy thought ran through my head, "Oh my god, I'm going to lose my virginity to Justin Bieber," but the music that came out either wasn't his, or was a one of his lesser-known songs. Either way, I didn't recognize it. It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad.

Once she was done arranging the music, she turned back to me. "So, don't you think you should be naked too? Or are you shy about your body?" When I didn't answer, she rambled on. "I used to be that way, but if we're going to have sex you should probably get over it." She sat down on my bed and looked at me expectantly.

I wouldn't exactly call myself body shy, but the situation was a little unusual. It was my cousin, after all. But I'd already committed to this course of action, so I had to undress. I took off my shirt first, then worked the button on my jeans, pulled them down, and stepped out of them. "There, I guess we're even." She still had her panties on, I still had my boxers.

"Not for long," she said, then lay back on the bed and raised her legs in the air. Her panties went upwards along her thighs, exposing her ass and the hole of her pussy, before hooking around her knee and then disappearing off her feet. Lily tossed it, and then rolled on her side and as she casually removed her socks, she looked at me, particularly at my boxers.

I lowered them. My dick was hard, but not completely... big enough that it made what I hoped was an impressive sight as it dangled, but it didn't stand up and out at full attention, not yet.

"See, you have a really good body, Jack," she said, inflating my ego. I knew I wasn't fat, but I didn't get as much exercise as I did in high school, so I was always a little concerned that I didn't look my best. "I knew you would. That's part of the reason I chose you to be my first."

Hearing her say that last line put the extra spring in my cock, and it bobbed up. It was actually a little embarrassing. "So, how exactly do you want to do this?" I said. "Do you have a particular position in mind?"

She shrugged. "You're the one with experience, you can decide if you want."

I could have just gone with that, but I didn't want to lie to her, even by omission. Even if the truth was a little embarrassing. "About that..." I started. She looked up. "I'm actually... um... I've never actually had sex before."

Her head visibly drew back, as though surprised. "You're bullshitting me."

"No," I insisted.

Her mouth hung open a moment. "But you had a girlfriend. For, like, years."

"She made, like, one of those chastity pledges."

"Ohhh," she said knowingly. "One of those. So you must have done anal, then, right? Everyone knows that doesn't count."

I shook my head. "I've never even had a blowjob until... Wednesday."

"Oh my god, you poor guy... That's just crazy." But surprise gradually changed into a look of quiet pride on her face, like she'd just realized she'd taken my blowjob cherry too. Suddenly, a thought seemed to strike her and she said, "You know, a lot of guys would just have cheated, and got some on the side."

My friends had suggested that, numerous times. But I really did love my ex, at the time. When she told me she wanted to break up because we were going to two different colleges and the long-distance thing wouldn't work, I was depressed for weeks. The worst of it is, it only took two months of college to turn her into something of a party-girl. While I didn't have proof she'd broken her chastity pledge, her own Facebook profile started to fill up with pictures of her drinking and hanging off random guys. I'd be surprised if I learned she was still a virgin.

I could have cheated while we together, easily. There had been offers. Some were casual, from the obviously sluttier girls in class, and one serious one from my lab partner and friend. During an assignment we had to do at her place, she told me flat out that we could have sex all I wanted and she'd never tell. I turned her down, and by the time I was single again she was studying in Europe. Sometimes, looking back, and considering how things turned out with my ex, I wish I'd accepted one of those offers, but when it came right down to it I'm glad I remained loyal. I didn't want to be That Guy. "I guess I'm not most guys," I told Lily.

She nodded. "Good. I knew I made the right choice with you." Her voice went soft. "I hate cheaters." The words had an undertone of hurt behind them, and I wondered if maybe some other boy had broken her heart. Before I could ask, she continued, "In fact, that's one of my rules. I don't do private shows for anybody with a girlfriend or wife. I don't care if they look at the pictures, that's no different than porn, but if a guy and I are getting off together and I find out later he's got a girlfriend, he's banned forever." She looked up to me and said, "Enough about that. So we're both virgins. What do you say we fix that for both of us?"

I smiled a little. "Sure."

She patted the bed beside her. "Why don't you join me here?"

She rolled over, and I lay down in the spot she left, facing her. She reached out a tentative hand towards my cock, and when I didn't stop her, put her hand around it and stroked it softly. "So what do you want to do first?"

I thought about it. Actually, I'd thought extensively about it long before doing things with Lily ever became a possibility... that's what virgins do, think about sex. And I'd learned certain things from porn, from sex advice columns, from friends... I didn't want to be a selfish lover, foreplay was important, and there was one thing in particular. "I could lick you, down there, if you want," I suggested. "Get you ready."

Her answer surprised me. "No."

"No?" I repeated. I knew some girls were self-conscious about that, but I didn't think Lily would be one of those. She said she was an exhibitionist, and oral sex involves a lot of looking directly at her most intimate parts.

She shook her head. "It's not that I don't want to. But... I want to save some things. For when I have a real boyfriend. That's one of them."

"Okay," I said. It was a little strange. Most people save sex for the boyfriend. "Anything else you want to save?"

"Kissing. I mean, on the lips. I mean, I'm sure that's not high on your list or anything, but I only want to kiss my boyfriend." She shrugged. "Other than that, I'm pretty open. You can finger me if you want, or suck on my nipples. Or we can just get right to the fucking. I think I'd personally prefer to get it over with, you know. So we don't have to be nervous anymore." She didn't seem nervous. Maybe she was picking up on my own anxieties. She continued, in a matter-of-fact tone, "I'm thinking we should do it with me on top, you on your back for the first time. You know, cowgirl style. That way you get the best view of me." I marveled again at the strangeness of it all... this young girl behaved as though she were much more an expert in sex than I was. Even though we were both virgins, it felt like she was here to teach me.

"Okay," I said. "I, uh, got some condoms."

"Do we really need them?" she complained. "For our first time, I want to feel you... I want to feel what sex is really like. And if you're telling the truth about you being a virgin, it's not like we have to worry about diseases."

"What about... pregnancy? You know, you can get pregnant even on the first time."

"I know. But I'm safe," she insisted. "Please? For our first time?"

It wasn't very responsible of me, but I let her win that one. I didn't want a condom between us either. So I let out a reluctant breath and said "Okay."

"Good." She slid towards the side, giving me room to take up the center of the bed. "Get on your back."

I rolled over and lay there, nearly spread-eagle. I never pictured myself being this passive for my first time, but there I was, waiting for my young cousin to take the initiative. She climbed on top of me, and I felt the pleasant sensation of her weight on top of me. I wasn't inside her yet, she was straddling my hips and pinning my dick between her and my stomach. Then, she shifted her hips a touch and I felt a warm sliminess as her crack rubbed up against my shaft. It was surprising how slick she was. I've heard of girls getting wet. I'd even felt it once when Lily forced my hand to her pussy, but, maybe because I was still a little in shock at the time, it didn't really register how surprising it was. Now, as she slowly slid up and down what was normally the underside of my dick, it was like she was coating it with a layer of oil.

"I can't believe it," she marveled. "We're actually going to do it."

"Yeah," I said. I'm a lot less wordy, it seems, when I'm highly aroused. As good as it felt with her on me like that, I wanted her to raise up a foot so I could aim myself at her hole and get it over with... all the teasing was starting to kill me.

It was about to get worse, though, not better. She stopped moving and settled herself down on me. "Before we get started though we should really discuss the rules."

"Rules?" It was the first she mentioned anything about rules, and a fine time to do it.

"If we're going to do this. Like, the first rule's obvious. No telling anyone we know. That means you can't tell my parents about my Facebook page either." I nodded, wanting to get the rules over with. "Rule two, no cheating on anybody. We can do this as long as we both enjoy it, but it stops if either of start dating somebody else."

"Fine," I said. It seemed like a remarkably mature attitude.

"Rule three, you don't get to tell me what to do. You can give me advice if you're nice about it, but the only people who have any say in my life are my parents, and I don't always listen to them, and my boyfriend when I get one."

I nodded, hurriedly, barely even aware of what she was saying. It didn't seem to matter. By this point, since telling her parents was out of the question, offering advice was all I could do anyway.

"Okay. Then we're just about ready to go. There's just one more thing." She hopped off me, and my dick sprang back up and seemed to jerk around as though, on its own, it was looking for a hole. But Lily was gone, off the bed. I turned to see her bend down at her clothes, and then turn back to me, clutching something in her hand. She bounced back on the bed, climbed on top again, and once more put my manhood in a tight squeeze between her body and mine. She put what she was holding on my chest.

It was a camera. "What..."

"You have to take pictures when I say," she explained. "For my page."

It was the hardest of all the things she asked. "But..."

She anticipated my objections, and rose to her defense. "It's my fetish," she said emphatically. "You want me to enjoy it, right? Well, thinking of all those people, looking at me later, jerking off, that makes me so hot." She resumed that slow, slimy slide back and forth. "It's not a big deal, it's friends only, remember? And your face won't ever be in any, I promise, just your dick." I didn't answer right away, just stared up at her. At first she was determined, but then an almost worried expression took over, like she didn't want me to say no. "If you won't," she added finally, "I'll choose someone else for my first time, someone who thinks about my sexual needs."

Or, more likely, who doesn't, who abuses her, maybe even rapes her after laughing at her request. If I were truly evil, I'd have done that already, as turned on as I was. If I was truly good, I'd have turned her down and talked to her parents, and damned be the consequences. But I'm somewhere in between, and in between the urgent pressure between my legs and the vulnerable look on her face, there was only one thing to do. I couldn't bear to disappoint her, and I couldn't resist her temptations. I picked up the camera. "Okay," I said.

That worried look shut off in a flash, and she smiled, and then launched into a quick explanation of how to work the camera. It wasn't really needed, it was pretty self-explanatory. After that, she instructed, "One just before we do it, and then one when you're in, those are the most important. After that, take what you want. Get as much of me as you can in the shot, though. Close-ups are nice once in a while, but they could be anybody, I want them seeing what I look like when I'm making... I mean having sex. Ready?"

I held the camera up close to my face and nodded. At the zoom level, I could see all of her in the little screen, as she raised up on her knees. She held my dick up in one hand and aimed it at her hole, as she looked forward expectantly, like she knew exactly what she was doing. I snapped the picture, more than anything else just so that we could start.

Finally, she began to drop down, and this time, instead of pinning my shaft, the head of my dick gently pushed apart the lips of her vulva, seemed to snag for an infinitesimal moment, then slipped into her hole. She slid downward with a soft groan... or maybe the groan was mine, it was hard to tell at that point. At first I was surprised, even a little disappointed that it went in so easily, there was no moment of sudden resistance once I'd entered the hole, just slow steady progress, but then I remembered... while she was a virgin, she had no physical cherry to pop. I'd seen pictures she'd posted with other things in there, things that would have torn a hymen to shreds.

As though reading my mind, once settled down and with me all the way inside her, she had a dreamy look on her face and said, "Oh, yeah, that feels much better than a cucumber." Any practice she had with other phallic objects still left her very tight though, it looked, and felt, like there was no room to spare.

I lifted the camera again, remembering her instruction to take another picture when we were all the way inside, but also because that expression on her face, that little upturned corner of her mouth in a satisfied smirk, like she'd just discovered a fun secret the whole world was doing its best to hide from her, it cried out to be preserved. After I did so, I decided to take a close-up of the place where our genitals met.

That seemed to inspire her to more energy, or maybe she'd just savored the moment enough. She started bouncing up and down, and although it felt incredible, I got my first disappointment of the night. The music in the background, which was hovering just below consciousness before, now insisted on my attention, as I heard the familiar, overplayed chorus, "Oh baby, baby, baby, ohhh.." At some point I hadn't noticed, the last song ended and Bieber had begun. I'd lost my virginity to a Justin Bieber song, and I'd now I'd have to remember it for the rest of my life.

It was a small price to pay. I guess if you're losing it to your twelve-year-old cousin, it might as well be to an insipid teen pop song, and it's not like I could ever tell anybody the real story anyway. I pushed the music out of my mind, and put the camera down, but within easy reach, as Lily continued to ride me. My hands slid up her legs to her waist and I helped direct her. She was light, I could lift her with hardly any effort. Hell, I could bounce her up and down like a ragdoll just by pumping my ass, and for a time, that seemed like what I was doing, although Lily's spirited and enthusiastic performance probably magnified the effect.

It was a performance, no doubt about that. She had her eyes open the entire time, watching me, making sure I was watching her, and her body and face moved in ways that looked like they were stolen right out of porn movies... biting her lip, putting her hands behind her head, chest and elbows thrust forward, or squeezing her breasts, or every so often she reaching one hand down to rub at her clit, at least until I helped do that for her. Most of all, she was vocal, repeating phrases like, "Oh, yeah, oh yeah," interspersed with the occasional "mmm" or "fuck me". The artifice behind it was obvious, especially when she held poses as soon as I lifted the camera, but that didn't stop it from being sexy as hell, maybe just because she was trying so hard.

Underneath all that performance, though, I think she did enjoy it. It was damned strange, that her efforts to look like she was having a great time were covering up the evidence that she really was, but every so often I'd hear a catch in her breath that felt genuine, or a moan that was too convincing, because it was guttural and not something that you'd think sounded sexy unless you heard it breaking through in the moment. More than that, there was the way her body itself responded. You can fake moans and looks of bliss, but her nipples were tight, erect little points, and her pussy not only gripped me, it seemed to squeeze on me with a natural rhythm. That seemed to get more frequent when I took her picture, like she was thinking of other people looking at it later and it caused her pussy to spasm a little.

I did take a few more pictures, partly to make her happy, but also to control the pace. If I thought I was getting close to cumming, I'd raise the camera and she'd slow down so I could get a clear shot, and I'd get a few seconds for the urge to pass. That trick didn't work very long, though... I soon reached a point when it didn't matter how slowly she moved, or even if she moved at all, the pleasure would continue to mount until it was too much to bear.

When that point came, Lily's cries of pleasure were growing higher in pitch, and, maybe it was just because of my own approaching climax, but at that moment I believed they were genuine. I groaned and closed my eyes, clutched the soft and pliable round of her ass, and pumped up and down for all my worth. She cried out sharply right as my balls exploded and I experienced a moment of bliss so perfect I was almost certain I would wake from it to find it was all a wet dream... but I didn't, I hung in that moment as several jets of what felt like pure energy squirted out of me, while I emptied myself into my cousin's womb.