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Message-ID: <58191asstr$1223511003@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: Carol Cobillard <cobillard@hotmail.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} Terrific Girl and the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis
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Date: Wed, 08 Oct 2008 20:10:03 -0400
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Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
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"Breast and penis augmentation is sociologically relevant because
it captures the intersection between individual agency and social
perception of identity contextualized within cultural body
ideals. Aspects of breast and penis augmentation in U.S. society
reside in socially constructed notions of sexuality and ideal
bodies. This embedded process of corporeal value generates a
speculation that individuals undergo body modification out of a
desire to attain social standards of sexual attractiveness or
reach a normal/standard body."
-- "The Sticking Out Parts: A Content Analysis of Print and
Website Advertisements on Breast and Penis Augmentation", M.A.
thesis, Georgia State Univ., 2003, p. 3 http://tinyurl.com/5rmvgp

"It's only protein, vitamins and salt; it's nourishing! It's also
a form of total union if you swallow the semen, which actually
becomes part of your flesh, and that is almost the most marvelous
feeling of all!"
-- David Berg, "Sex Questions and Answers!" True Komix 816:2

"To be sensuous is to be holy; to be aroused is to be close to
God. Orgasm is sacrament, semen is Host. Be not shy, be not
modest, be not reluctant: be bold, be confident, be sexy. Show
off your arousal, your excitement and your climax as evangelists
for Jesus. God commands you to share your puberty and bring souls
to Jesus!"
-- Rev. X, talking to teens in Our Town, 1994


It's all well and good to talk about freeing an adolescent's
spirit by freeing her or his libido, but -- especially for girls
-- the aftermath of a coming-out party or of any defloration is
neither simple nor straightforward. Coming out is, after all, a
celebration of puberty, of coming of age, of the start of a
lifetime of romance and passion, we hope of devotion to Jesus and
an acceptance of God's mandate to share the faith through sharing
our bodies.

I've written about the subculture of "dogging" -- the British
word for voyeurism-exhibitionism (there's no succinct equivalent
in America) -- where the participants look to the audience to
direct their sexual endeavors. There was a similar game that was
played by boys and girls who had just come out. We didn't invent
it at Mom's Friend's House any more than we invented pride in
orgasm, pride oral sex, pride in a girl being seen with semen
bubbling from her mouth. The game of "directed sex" was rather
brought to us from somewhere else. The way it worked was that a
girl and a boy, having recently come out (perhaps just the day or
the week before), would stand before one or two or three or four
girls (and maybe a boy or two) who would direct them in the
minutest elements of making love: how to manipulate penis and
mouth to excite and please and initiate orgasm and ejaculation:
and, of course, how to manipulate and consume the semen.

Typically it would happen like this: the boy and the girl would
be told to disrobe each other. The viewers would remark at the
erection of penis and of nipples and other signs of arousal. Then
the boy might be told to fondle the girl's breasts. And the girl
would be told to watch her boy's penis, perhaps to fondle it, to
cuddle his scrotum, play with his balls. To kiss the penis, to
have her vagina kissed, just by way of acknowledgment of what was
to come. If both boy and girl were virgins the boy might need
help and encouragement: many moms (and dads too) wanted their
boys to get their sex education "on the job" so to speak; and
more specifically, since masturbation was to be discouraged, they
wanted their boys to engage in heterosexual sex without ever
having masturbated. "A boy's semen should never be wasted" was a
major theme of Mom's Friend's theology and childraising. To
observe the surprise and delight of a boy having his first orgasm
especially when he is ejaculating in to a girl's mouth is
delightful. It reminds me, of course, of the year I spent on the
houseboat seducing 12-year-old boys. Certainly every boy knew, by
the time he needed to know it, that if he got erections at the
sight of others making love, and if he had some pubic hair, one
of the more forward girls -- Terrific Girl, for example -- would
want to be his first, and would come and play with his penis.
This was scarcely new with us: there is testimony regarding the
CoG about this sort of thing happening, and about mothers (or
some of them) watching. So long as there is no teasing and no
ridiculing I think that it's delightful, but then I would say
that since more than once my Mom looked on while I had a young
boy's penis in my mouth. Perhaps Mr. MacAfee "didn't know what
puberty was till [he] was almost past it", but our boys and girls
did, and their growth, and that of their sex parts, was noted and
admired. That, I suggest, is wholesome and endearing.

(Semen is so central to the human condition that boys and girls
were encouraged to taste it, especially at their first sexual
encounter. That's why we would so often see the boy and girl
kissing each other's sex parts after vaginal intercourse. This is
something I still do out of habit with my partner, The
Blond-Haired Boy. John McCain has praised a paean to semen:
http://tinyurl.com/4zc6ls  ("John McCain Praises Song About Semen
at Arizona Campaign Stop: Praises Puerto Rican Rapper Daddy
Yankee's Song 'Gasolina'") -- I guess there should be no surprise
that there are subtexts even to political claptrap. But then
McCain is a serial adulterer and fornicator. And lest you, Dear
Reader, accuse me and my friends of the same, know that while --
like society in general -- we promote (safe) sex early and often
and with many partners, our credo calls for total loyalty upon
marriage. Marriage is a contract: it is lovemaking that is the
sacrament.)

A boy and girl might be led to a bed or to one of the gym mats we
had in so many places at Mom's Friend's House, and the boy would
be instructed to kiss the girl passionately, first on the lips
and then on the breasts and then at her vagina; and to move his
tongue along the slit to excite her clitoris. Soon enough the
girl would be made to kiss and lick the boy's penis, to run her
tongue along its underside. To put the penis in her mouth and run
her tongue all around its circumference. If she hesitated, her
mom would surely tell her "take his penis in your mouth, dear,
and rub its head all over with your tongue". The virgin girl
would be told to admire his circumcision, his corona, his penis
slit, then to stroke the underside of his penis with her tongue
until it reached maximum size. (As Mom's Friend told us
repeatedly: a girl never demeans herself when she does that: she
acts in the name of Jesus and she evangelizes for him. "It feels
so natural to have your penis in my mouth", Terrific Girl would
say to boys after making love. "I love it when I make you happy.
When the semen comes, I feel on top of the world.")

Perhaps about this time a Polaroid photograph would be taken;
digital cameras hadn't been invented yet. Although in principle
Mom's Friend forbade the photographing of lovemaking we did it
all the time. Indeed some girls, even some moms I think, kept
scrapbooks of the puberty year(s) of particular boys. Some even
measured the boy's penis, flaccid and stiff. Some recorded
comments on ejaculation. Picture records also existed of girls:
of their breast and hip development, their sexual precocity.

But the main point was to record the growing confidence of boy
and girl.

Typically the girl would be 12 or 13, the boy 13 or 14. Sometimes
-- indeed, often -- the kids in question would be late-bloomers
and the issue would be one of convincing both that the enjoyment
of lovemaking, and its symbolism as prayer and holy communion, do
not depend upon size: that the mere existence of some pubic hairs
is in religious law (ours and some others) a license to make
love; perhaps even an obligation to try. We were naked enough of
the time so that boys and girls could not escape having the start
of puberty noticed and commented on -- and at some point either
being seduced or (for girls) goaded into having a coming-out
party.

Once it was clear that both boy and girl were excited and ready,
the girl would be told to place her lips firmly around the penis
and move her head up and down. Or, if the penis was not fully
stiff she should tickle its underside and press her lips against
the head gently, moving her mouth lightly over the top of the
penis to stiffen it. After minutes of that, the boy would be told
to signal to us as his excitement increased and as he approached
orgasm. We would want the girl to anticipate the ejaculation no
matter how much or how little semen would spurt into her mouth.
And we would want her to show it to us and then to swallow it.

And the boy, then, would need to change places with her and to
follow our instructions minutely, pushing his tongue as far as it
would go into her vagina, taking all her soft parts into his
mouth from time to time, making various flicking and circular
motions with his tongue over her clitoris, exactly as we would
instruct. And, most importantly, showing off her vagina to us so
we could see it dilated and excited, eager for a penis.

The girl, too, would have to tell us as she approached orgasm.
And when she reached that point, the boy would be told to put his
penis into her vagina and to try for a second orgasm.

And when they were finished we would inspect their bodies and
admire the traces of semen. For the girl, the boy's penis and the
semen it had given her would be a trophy. She and her boy would
find themselves in demand as partners among those watching. And
it would be lovely to see the two of them becoming more
comfortable in their bodies -- as it would, indeed, be to see
their bodies, and especially their sex parts, growing and
becoming more beautiful, bigger and sexier.

The sense of wonderment on a boy's face when he realizes what has
happened to him, and that orgasm is an event repeatable at will
and sex a self-replenishing asset, a renewable resource, is
palpable. And from it derives a powerful means of expression and
control that girls enjoy. It is thus that coming out gives girls
a new freedom and a new power and, in our ethic, a new closeness
to God. For those who have not seen it and who wonder how a
mother, steeped in our environment and herself committed to
sexual evangelism, and a father too, can be so moved at the
exquisite site of a daughter playing with a penis and bringing it
to excitement and ejaculation in her mouth, here is the answer.
Semen carries the Word and the Way and, swallowed it becomes part
of the girl, part of her essence and character and faith. In her
vagina it becomes promise of rejuvenation and fecundity and
propagation of the faith and the body. Rev. X said we should
always watch the faces and the sex parts of mothers (and those
fathers who might be present, a minority certainly) when a girl
or a boy is in the throes of sex: they will reflect the sanctity
of the act and the pride in the event.

In that sense one could see, even months and years after she came
out Terrific Girl's dad watch fondly while she would make her
move towards a penis and put it in her mouth. By the time semen
would seep out of the corner of her mouth, her dad would show a
fatherly pride. But at the same time one could see tension in his
penis as if he were restraining it from full erection. Terrific
Girl liked that, though: she was very proud of her dad's penis
with its very round head, bushy pubic hair and big balls. She
said she loved to see him making love to Mom's Friend and I
remember her watching their lovemaking easily a year before she
began to develop. I remember a couple of times seeing her stare
at his penis while it dripped with seminal fluid, and she would
nudge me and point with pleasure at it. I know she tried to
impress her dad with her breasts after they'd grown a bit; and
then later made a point of making love around him on the
occasions when he was home from his business travels. But it
wasn't until she was almost 14 and the boys she made love to had
more or less mature-sized penises that Terrific Girl felt
comfortable having sex in tandem with her dad and Mom's Friend.
It's different, a girl having sex in tandem with her father from
with her mother, the way I so often did. But nice, nonetheless.
Terrific Girl's attitude was phenomenal. Longtime readers will
remember that almost her first sexual expression was her delight
at the time I experimented with the sleeping boy's penis to see
if I could make it ejaculate without waking the boy. For some
reason she and Older Girl felt inspired to let their nightdresses
fall to the ground and to stand nude in the moonlight in the
boys' room while I showed off the semen and swallowed it. To this
day I have not met a girl sexier than Terrific Girl.

Terrific Girl organized the kind of sexy afternoons that made
girls giggle to remember: a bevy of 14- and 15-year-olds sitting
in chairs alongside each other, each with a boy nuzzling her
vulva, pressing his tongue inside to tickle her clitoris and
satisfy her vagina. Meanwhile the girls would gossip and chat,
and only when one by one they would reach climax (or, in the
alternative, pretend to do so although I don't think that was so
often) would a cry of pleasure disrupt the chatter. By that age,
Terrific Girl had, as one boy described them, "delicious big
breasts", firm and with large nipples, and she loved being naked
with boys and would make quite a fuss over a boy's nice penis. At
our nude dance parties she would ostentatiously take down her
date's underpants and later often show off her vagina as
girl-on-top in mutual oral sex. Older Girl, her step-sister, had
done likewise years before. Older Girl, Mom's Friend's daughter,
who captivated boys and later men, and for whom the penis was
worshipful company.

Terrific Girl had indeed learned from her elders, from us. While
a particular boy might make the first move, might kiss her,
fondle her breasts, move his hand down to her vulva and caress
her clitoris, she would lead from there. Soon her vagina would be
over his mouth, and he would know what was expected of him; she
would reciprocate by taking his penis in her mouth. And it was
always lovely to see her lips on the penis, coaxing it towards
orgasm and ejaculation. If the boy came first, Terrific Girl
would turn over and, with his semen still resting in her mouth
would guide his head back to her vagina to bring her to climax,
only then swallowing his semen. Or if she was first, she might
guide his penis into her vagina for him to ejaculate there and
then, perhaps take his semen-coated penis into her mouth. And
then the two would kiss to share the traces of Holy Communion.

That was her protocol -- as it was sometimes mine -- and it
reflected exactly Mom's Friend's theology of oral sex as
religious fulfillment. But note that it does take some effort
and, usually, practice before a girl can concentrate her mouth on
the tip of a penis while at the same time trying to reach climax
efficiently. I caught on quickly because I'd seen Mom doing it
and Mom had explained the physiology of the penis to me just as
she'd shown me the parts of her vaginal area that were the most
sensitive and pleasure-giving.

(Note also that outside the sort of open and sexually-liberal
communities we lived in where kids grow up seeing and knowing
about oral sex, acceptance of it as ordinary and "normal" is not
automatic: http://snurl.com/likeoral Especially for girls. This
is something that I would come to learn when around the age of 15
I began to recruit outside girls (not many of them, but a few) to
our sexually liberal style. It was no less complicated although
somewhat faster in process to recruit boys to perform
cunnilingus. Readers of my past essays should be aware of this.)

Terrific Girl gave inspiration to a cohort who came after her,
but whose sex lives I have not been able to follow because Mom's
Friend's House more or less closed down once Terrific Girl
herself reached 19 and Mom's Friend decided that the social
hysteria over underage sex and "child abuse" put her the members
of her commune at risk. No new families came and by attrition her
project of enabling girls to know themselves and their bodies
through religious sexuality was phased out. Similar projects
still exist elsewhere, and I've written about a few that I
visited, such as Rev. Mary's and that colony in Baja California.
There are many more. I go to reunions at Mom's Friend's House,
but though there is liberal sexuality still, it is subdued, not
ostentatious. For a lot of reasons, mainly though because it
could be professional suicide for me and my partner to do
otherwise, our "free enterprise" is over except for our
occasional visits back to Our Town. Word can too quickly get
around in the Capital City.

Anyway, today, with the commune era long gone and free-sex
religions under attack, what one tends to find are nude dance
parties and teen-directed events, notably the sort of bikini or
underwear birthday parties I've been to where at one point the
birthday girl might spontaneously undress her date; or else
simply announce "I want to see your penis!". Two of them would in
due course put on a display, perhaps mutual oral sex the way
Terrific Girl would do; and the guests would carry on from there.
Terrific Girl had a parlor trick that I've seen others perform as
well: having taken down her boy's underpants she would want to
see how quickly and firmly her boy's penis became erect before
she would kiss and make love to it. She would move to the floor,
and while lying on her back draw the boy's penis into her mouth
while at the time guiding his mouth towards her vagina. "Balls in
the air" we called it: and the penis, now stiff, would move
slightly up and down, much of the work being done by her lips and
tongue until eventually there was ejaculation and white semen
could be seen seeping around her lips. And on the other side, the
boy would be using his tongue to play with her vagina and her
clitoris; it would be a challenge, rarely achieved, for the two
to reach orgasm simultaneously.

I was inspired to write the above because I found an old photo,
taken more than a dozen years ago, of a nude 12-year-old Terrific
Girl standing next to a nude, pimply-faced, small 11-year-old
nude boy with a big, 16-year-old-sized penis and lovely big
balls. He had a bushy head of hair on is head, and a lot of hair
around his penis; but his penis was smooth and clear against that
magic triangle. As I recall the story, the boy's penis had been
already mature by age 10 and he had been seduced by a babysitter
who'd had sex with him dozens of times before they were
discovered in flagrante delicto. (I have found that precocious
puberty is not all that rare; here's a photo from a medical
journal on a US Government Web site: http://tinyurl.com/6mxc3j
and one from an encyclopedia of medical anomalies:
http://geocities.com/cobil2/precoc.html ) He was one of those few
boys brought to Mom's Friend's House not because of a family
background in the CoG or a commune or some strained naturism but
because of what his mother thought was sexual trauma followed by
psychological issues that one hoped could be resolved by open
sexuality with peers. Mom's Friend insisted that mother and boy
accept her total program of sexually open lifestyle and nudity.
Since the boy was already circumcised (like Jesus, Mom's Friend
would say) he avoided a problem that I'd seen arise in a couple
of cases: adolescent or pubescent boys who had to be circumcised,
at some pain and nuisance I think because of their big penises
whereas infantile circumcision is easy and presumably painless.
(As it later transpired, the boy was at least nominally Jewish,
which in the end explained a lot. But that's OK: I have, as they
say in English movies, snogged and been shagged by a few Jews in
my 28-year lifetime, most of them after I'd gone off for my
junior year in college and then, when I'd graduated, moved to the
Capital City.)

I love seeing small boys with big penises and I think I might
have seduced this boy myself given the opportunity. Terrific
Girl's task was to introduce him to oral sex. Being close to a
nude girl, having her breasts practically poke him in the eye,
made this boy quite nervous, but Terrific Girl new how to deal
with that. Soon enough she was playing with his penis and soon
enough it was in her mouth. Without finishing up, she made the
boy reciprocate, and he had to learn how to perform cunnilingus.
In fact he had to learn about vaginal anatomy, since all he knew
about up till then was the quickie in missionary position.

Terrific Girl, taller than he, with her growing breasts still not
all that big but fetching nonetheless, dominated the boy and yet,
because of his big penis and profuse pubic hair there was the
anomaly of his apparent maturity and her apparent immaturity. But
emotionally it was the opposite: Terrific Girl, not yet 13, knew
all about sex and loved oral sex; the penis was her friend,
ejaculation her sacrament. We would come to love to see him with
his cute penis (that's how Divine Brown described Hugh Grant's
penis!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Divine_Brown_(sex_worker) )
erect, proposition her and, if she was in the mood, have his
penis go into her mouth, his mouth go to her vagina, and then his
Big Penis slide easily into that vagina and move, first slowly
then more rapidly back and forth to orgasm. What a beautiful
sight! Terrific Girl would have him hold up his big, circumcised
penis as a trophy, and then she would take it and lick the semen
and her mucus from it; and then she would kiss the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis on the lips, much as she
always did when she was happy after sex. The 11-Year-Old-Boy
would make love to all the girls within his grasp, his age group.
But with Terrific Girl it would always be a performance.

The first hurdle was to be introducing the Boy to public nudity
and public sex. He'd not been nude in public since puberty; even
his mom hadn't seen him naked in years until the day she saw his
penis making love to the babysitter. Terrific Girl, even at 12,
was the right person to resolve this.

She put her breasts into his personal space and insisted on
helping him get undressed. It seemed so natural as she did it. It
was, really, just a reprise of the naughty babysitter theme and
less of a challenge for the boy since they were peers and since
his mother, by now herself nude, was nodding approvingly. But
still the boy hesitated at the point where he was undressed save
for his underpants. The size of his penis was now apparent and we
were all looking at it. Whether it would be his mom who pulled
them down -- something of a tradition at our coming-out parties
-- or the girl whose hypnotic breasts had paralyzed him didn't
matter; later nobody would remember, not even the boy. His Big
Penis was so lovely - and it would get lovelier as it started to
stiffen. But it was gorgeous anytime. Big, with a lovely
circumcised round head and a bush of pubic hair and sweet balls
below. And a cute slit that had to be watched in case a drop of
seminal fluid appeared. (Why is the sight of it so entrancing to
a girl? Is it that it's confirmation of her sexiness? That she is
needed? Anyway, it's always delicious.)

I suppose that a precociously mature boy gets used to others
staring at his penis, or more likely, pretending not to stare at
his penis. Perhaps they wear loose clothes to hide the bulge and
avoid public nudity. In our environment, where we had nudity
zones such as at the pool, the 3-second rule (the duration of an
allowed gaze without infringing on gender or sexual privacy)
didn't apply. The 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis would have
to get used to being noticed, to having his penis noticed and
wanted. But like the bull that's lost his virginity this boy had
urges, and the sight of nude Terrific Girl brought them on.
Enough to overcome shyness, false modesty, false morality and
other hindrances. At Mom's Friend's House sexual electricity was
pervasive. And the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis and
Terrific Girl began to fondle each other. Terrific Girl put the
Big Penis in her mouth just to make it hard. And then the boy was
on top of her and she directed his Big Penis into her vagina. He
went on at his own pace, his hips up and down, his penis in and
out, and then there was semen. It was so gratifying to see the
small boy with the Big Penis making love to the smiling girl, her
legs locked around his, moving her body in response to his
thrusts. It was so gratifying to see the two of them so happy.

(Mom said that she knew a boy who had gone through puberty at age
10 and she met him again 40 years later only to find that he had
recently decided he was gay and had walked out on his wife. Mom
wondered if there was any connection; I doubt it. Perhaps the
Rev. Fred Waldron Phelps could explain.)

They separated, and Terrific Girl leaned over and grasped the Big
Penis. The 11-Year-Old-Boy resisted at first when he moved to
take it into her mouth again but she persisted. And she pressed
her lips against it as she withdrew it, and then she ran her
tongue all over its head. And she put her hips to his face and
made him kiss her vagina an, finally, pulled him back down and
instructed him on what to do with his tongue and her clitoris to
bring her to climax. His mom looked on, but he seemed not to
notice at first; then he did but stifled any embarrassment. Now
he was one of us. In fact, by the time they went off to shower,
another girl had come forward to be the 11-Year-Old-Boy's partner
for the next day, She would teach him more about oral sex, more
about our theology, more about how his Big Penis should be shared
and not hidden.

(Why is it that the 11-Year-Old-Boy's mom, and all boys' moms, so
anxiously watch their son's penis for signs of ejaculated semen?
I deduce that it is an affinity for her own DNA, something that
she has to see to define her own being. Anyway, it's something
I've seen constantly over the years.)

I don't know anyone, male or female, who would have said that
what had just occurred was inappropriate. The boy and the girl,
the boy with the Big Penis and the sexually-developed and
-experienced girl looked so happy, so fulfilled, so natural. Mom
decried the way Moses David had encouraged sex with and by
pre-pubescent children. This was quite different, and you cannot
measure readiness by age alone. Far better to provide guidance
and to assure safe sex than to leave pubescent and adolescent
kids to their own devices and to secrecy. That can only lead to
pregnancy and to STDs. Furthermore, oral sex is essential to
maximizing pleasure and to fulfilling the divine command; it is
something best learned early and well.

(The boy and his mom disappeared a few years later. I think it
had something to do with the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis
being found out as having sex outside the closed circle of our
community, and thus risking its health; there was indeed a rumor
that he had contracted something but if he had he certainly
didn't infect any of the rest of us. By that time he left he'd
had sex with a couple of dozen of Mom's Friend's girls at least
once, most of them many, many times. The 11-Year-Old-Boy with the
Big Penis came back with his mom for an alumni reunion recently
and nobody was so crude as to bring up the question of his
absence. His Big Penis was not, at that age, particularly
notable; indeed it was just average to look at. The Boy was,
however, still a target of attention by girls and especially by
their mothers; but this had more to do with his prospects than
his past: he had turned out to be more than just owner of a
pretty penis and was now a medical student -- and not off in
Grenada or Guadalajara or Prague, but one of the 129 accredited
US medical schools.)

The appearance among us of the precocious 11-Year-Old-Boy with
the Big Penis caused something of a stir with mothers of girls
aged 12 to 14, many or most of whom wanted to arrange
assignations with their daughters, often stretching to the
breaking point the "10% rule". And whereas mothers who wanted
occasionally to keep tabs on their daughters' sex lives would do
so from a discreet distance and would pretend to carry on a
conversation or do their knitting, several moms planted
themselves, with or without their daughters, right next to the
couple, their eyes following the thrusting penis and anticipating
trickles of semen. I'm sure assignations for the next day were
made at such times just as that other girl had booked the Big
Penis for the day following his first sex with Terrific Girl. I
don't know how many times some mom got her daughter to measure
the Big Penis: just over 6-1/4 inches long and just under 5
inches in circumference when erect, about 3-1/4 inches long when
flaccid, according to the note I made in my diary. Not big in
adult terms but Big for an 11-Year-Old-Boy. The optimum size, I
thought, for oral sex, making a beautiful picture when a girl
would manipulate it and lick it in such a way that we could see
the semen spurt up onto her lips and into her mouth.

(I asked the boy, inappropriately I now think but what did I know
at the time, how it had felt to have his penis start growing when
he was 9 or 10, and did he know what was in store for him when it
did. He said he had been intensely embarrassed at times and tried
to hide it but couldn't. And his babysitter had fought with him
at bath time. Once he had undressed to his underpants she had
seemed startled, staring at his penis and she had insisted he
undress fully for his bath and he didn't want to and finally she
came over and removed the pants and asked him if he knew what his
big penis could do. She said she could make him feel very good,
make him very happy. She asked him about wet dreams, but he got
confused. And without a word she took off her top and showed him
her breasts and made him feel them, and then put his hand down
her waistband to touch her vulva. And she stroked his penis even
though he tried to pull away and before he knew it she was on the
bed and she was caressing his penis to make it hard and then his
penis was inside her. And he felt so nice to ejaculate that he
promised to say nothing; his reward was to have sex with her
every week until, by chance, his mom rushed into the house
because she had forgotten something; and the door was open and
his big penis was just about to ejaculate.)

His mom spoke to her doctor, but that doctor happened to be part
of Mom's Friend's circle and his advice was for mother and boy to
join Mom's Friend's community, for the boy to have sex only with
girls of his own age. And thus it was that he met Terrific Girl
and that I got to see his beautiful penis and he got to make love
to so many of our friends. I had an odd feeling about the doctor,
as I did about Rev. X and about many of the fathers and the
professional men who frequented Mom's Friend's House. I can
understand why Mom's Friend limited their access to places where
children were naked unless they were accompanied by their own
kids. And why men over 19 were excluded from coming-out parties
and nude dance parties. I know of no inappropriate behavior
having taken place, but one can never be too careful; sexual
liberality is fine for same-age, consenting adolescents and it is
generally safe for mothers or both parents together to be
present; but one has to be careful concerning the motivations of
others who might be watching.

Getting back to the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis and his
original seduction, it was no wonder, I think, that the
babysitter did what she did after she saw the outline of his
penis through his underpants. I think any girl would have been
excited at the sight and wanted to see more. That she had sex
with him is inexcusable, of course, but we know that this
happens; and it was common currency at the CoG and The Family. I
suppose every girl remembers certain penises in her life; and Mom
always had that photo of Louis Abolafia's to dream of:
http://snurl.com/abolafia . Even though it never made its way
into my vagina, I will always remember the 11-Year-Old-Boy's
fondly. (One doesn't, sadly, remember every detail of every penis
which is why from an early age I made a point of recording in my
diary most of the penises I encountered, and commented a bit on
their owners. These essays are a product of that.)

The Boy and his Big Penis quickly became a focus of attention and
desire. Every girl of the age of sexual awareness and above
surely wanted to kiss and fondle that penis and those balls; and
if she could not, by reason of age or not yet having come out do
so, then she wanted to enjoy them vicariously, to see other girls
kissing and fondling them and making that penis ejaculate. There
is something fantastic about the sight of a small boy standing
proud, with a precocious big penis fiercely erect, big balls
hanging down as a challenge to girls to make love. There is
palpable tension at such a moment and, when there is no girl
immediately nearby, curiosity as to how the tension will resolve
itself.

Mothers wanted his penis for their daughters. I know there were
at least two defloration parties at which he presided. At the one
I saw he gently and gingerly offered his penis to the coming-out
girl's lips, and she shyly opened her mouth and attended to it. I
could see the girl's eyes, romantic yes, but also at first
wishful, then eager, then wondrous as the penis approached her
mouth and as she opened her mouth to let it enter and pressed her
lips against it and as the penis moved in and out. He had style;
and when he knelt down and spread the girl's legs apart and
brought his lips to her vagina it was not just the girl who felt
the thrill. By now he was experienced at cunnilingus, he could
bring the girl reliably to the cusp of climax and make her
urgently want his penis in her vagina. Some mothers would choose
a smaller penis for their 12-year-old daughter's first time, but
it really isn't an issue when a virgin vagina is properly wet
with saliva and dilated from being kissed and licked. If it is,
then the girl is not ready for sex in the first place and her
mother has not protected her. (There are those, including not a
few girls for whom the issue is relevant, who think that oral sex
is fine even if the girl's vagina isn't ready for a penis; but I
have my doubts. I don't know any way to limit sex to oral sex: at
some point the penis is just going to find its mark and slide
into the vagina. As I say later on in this essay a number of
girls did exactly this, enjoying oral sex for a year or so while
still virgins; but I think there's a risk.)

Back to our story and our point. The girl, her mom, the Boy and
the attending friends could see the Big Penis push its way into
her, pass through her hymen, and make her shudder. When he had
ejaculated he smiled and stood back, his penis stiff at first but
gradually shrinking, the girl leaning back exhausted. How
different this beautiful sacrament is from the awful "night of
defloration" imposed upon genitally-mutilated Muslim girls in so
many countries! Each of our girls, virtually every one, would
reach climax at her coming-out party or a nude dance party, or
wherever she happened to be deflowered; and in her post-coital
paroxysm she could delight in the sight and feel and taste of the
sticky penis with all the bodily fluids it bore.

With or without the involvement of mothers, the 11-Year-Old Boy's
Big Penis was the first penis in the mouth of more pubescent
girls than any I can remember. Often it just happened; other
times it was on a dare by her friends; sometimes the boy took the
initiative to seduce. But it would have been hard for any girl
raised in our ethic, once she had breasts and pubic hair, to
resist a penis that whether by accident or design found itself
within inches of her face, rising in erection.

--------------

As I have said many times in the past, Mom's Friend's House was
female-driven and feminist and it was generally mothers, not
fathers, who observed, admired, encouraged. A few girls and boys
had been sponsored -- or were living with us, usually temporarily
-- with their father. But only Terrific Girl lived with us for an
indefinite period with her father; indeed her dad was Mom's
Friend's partner; Mom's Friend was Terrific Girl's stepmother.
Terrific Girl had a really good and positive relationship with
her dad although he was absent, traveling on business, much of
the time. He too had an occasion to remark on the 11-Year-Old-Boy
with the Big Penis, and I think it's worth a diversion to tell
the story:

It was common practice to lounge about Mom's Friend's House in
sheer underwear. I don't know where the custom came from, but
even a lot of boys would wear sheer briefs: it was nice to see
the outline of each boy's penis, the shape of his circumcised
head. As girls were discouraged from shaving pubic hair, it was
just as well that we wore nice underwear. Actually I often wore a
sports bra instead, not exactly sheer, but this was for practical
reasons. There were particular places -- especially at the pool
and sometimes in the basement when nudity was de rigueur. And
there and in other places flirting and sex play -- and making
love itself -- were free and easy. There were particular signals
and codes, and an invitation to make love was easy to come by and
incapable of being misunderstood. It might consist of a
persistent stare, with a boy or girl coming closer as a result.
It's amazing how just looking at a penis, or at breasts or a
vulva, or even at their shapes through sheer underwear, can
provoke excitement and arousal and lead to fun. And of course --
as we know from our nude dance parties -- once one girl takes a
penis into her body others will follow.

I remember seeing Terrific Girl and the 11-Year-Old-Boy in such a
sex game, and Terrific Girl had the boy's underpants down, her
bra off, and his penis in her mouth with a hand stroking his
scrotum. About that time her dad, who had just come home from one
of his trips, came into sight, walking from the showers with a
town around his waist. Terrific Girl took the penis out of her
mouth and called over to her dad to come and look, saying that
the 11-Year-Old-Boy was about to come. She put the penis back in
her mouth, her dad moved closer to watch, and a couple of dozen
strokes later the ejaculation started. Terrific Girl, in trying
to show off the spurting semen, in allowing its head to slip out
of her mouth for a moment to be seen, missed her cue and one of
the spurts, liquid not viscous, splashed against her chin,
trickled down her breast and abdomen and on to her thigh. She
rushed the penis back in her mouth and caught and swallowed the
rest of the semen, then licked what she could from around her
lips, pulled down her panties, took out a tampon and disposed of
it in a tissue, and spread her legs so the 11-Year-Old-Boy could
have access to her clitoris and her vagina with his tongue. He
went after it eagerly, licking up some drops of his drying semen
in the process. His tongue slid inside her vagina and then moved
upwards to stroke her clitoris while he used his lips to
reinforce those strokes and to suck into his mouth stray drops of
mucus and blood. Her dad smiled at the sight of his daughter
being brought to orgasm and perhaps too at the sight of the boy's
Big Penis swinging about erect. Then, when the girl began to
groan at the onset of climax and the boy rose and put his penis
into her vagina, her dad's towel fell to the floor. His own penis
stuck out at an oblique angle. Someone thought to call for Mom's
Friend to deal with it.

Mom's Friend's method of dealing with it was very much like
Terrific Girl's: to put the penis into her mouth and to excite it
further; only once it was fully erect she pushed him to the floor
and moved her body over Terrific Girl's Dad's, positioning her
vagina over his mouth. It's always lovely to see a vagina over a
boy's or a man's mouth: it's lovemaking at its most wonderful,
the full sexual beauty of a girl or women being open to view by
friends and family. Terrific Girl and the 11-Year-Old-Boy stopped
to watch. I think it particularly nice that Terrific Girl and her
dad could share the vicarious pleasure of each other's orgasm.
Although she had been free to see her dad's penis and his
lovemaking forever, Terrific Girl really hadn't shown any
interest until just before her breasts began to grow and she got
some pubic hair. In the months before she had her first sex --
indeed just about the time she accompanied me and Older Girl
while I gave oral sex to the sleeping boy to see if I could make
him ejaculate while still asleep, just about that time Terrific
Girl began to take an interest in penises generally, and to take
pleasure in watching her dad and Mom's Friend make love. I don't
think that for her to make love in tandem with her dad making
love to Mom's Friend nearby is any less lovely than, for example,
my making love to a boy and my mom likewise with a partner of her
own right next to me. This is in no way inappropriate: it's the
most natural sharing of joy and it occurs worldwide where
families live in close quarters, in one-room homes. Terrific
Girl's dad evidently thought so: he said that to see his daughter
receiving semen made him proud and happy, that it was the most
natural, the most human, the most sacred moment of "unity and
appreciation". I think so too.

--------------

The celebrity of the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis and the
sexual tension he generated had unexpected consequences. The same
mothers who pushed their daughters his way, who told their
daughters to watch their posture, present their breasts most
provocatively, wear romantic underwear, cosmetics and scent found
themselves -- middle aged or not -- needing heightened quantities
and qualities of sex. They would join the chain of Mrs.
Robinsons, trying to attract boys of the over-19 set and the
professional men or the few single fathers. And whereas most (but
not all) of the sex among single moms and men and the over-19
crowd had been private, now there was more openness, more nudity
beyond the swimming pool area. I think Mom and Mom's Friend --
two who had never seen any merit in sexual privacy -- enjoyed the
change. Mom and I had not infrequently had sex in tandem, but now
she encouraged me to join her outdoors, often in the kind of
mutual oral sex that allows women to display their vaginas in the
best way while at the same time displaying her skill with a penis
and all the stages of arousal, pleasure build-up, orgasm and
ejaculation.

(But then middle-aged women may have distinct views on sex and
sexuality:
http://tinyurl.com/4oqshm )

It was an element of faith and evangelism in Mom's Friend's
community that families should share the sight of their bodies,
share the sight of their sex. I think virtually all the
nonresident members followed that custom. Resident members,
mostly single mothers and their offspring, were -- or at least
the mothers were -- someone less exhibitionist. Still, every girl
and boy from the youngest age would have come to know throughout
childhood the nature of human sexuality and the emotional and
physical process of lovemaking. I think it a superb testimony to
our faith that girls would reach puberty without fear of penis,
without apprehension of penis in vagina, and with an expectation
and an eagerness for oral sex and, among girls, for the taste of
semen.

Still, I do not think enough attention is given to scrotum and
testicles as sources of female excitement and pleasure and as
male erogenous zones in the romance dialog -- both among the
sexually active and among those not yet ready for it. Some few
boys have balls that are disproportionate in size; or they grow
faster than the penis during puberty. Testicles are in constant
motion, they are terribly sensible to touch and caress, sometimes
ticklish and often poles of pleasure. Like Louis Abolafia's, the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis had balls that were special,
caressable, kissable; manly, promising; fecund, needy. ("National
treasures", one mom called them. Just look at Louis Abolafia's:
http://snurl.com/abolafia .) One wanted to see them free and
loose, joining the penis in motion in mouth or vagina. One wanted
to love them and see them making love and made love to. Mom
mentioned this, and she said that the more attention a girl paid
to a boy's balls the more he would remember the occasion, the
more loyalty he would have -- if only because so many of his
partners would be ignoring that erogenous zone and its potential
for delaying and enhancing sexual pleasure at ejaculation.

Ejaculation is a largely unseen wonder. The "cream pie" fetish
recognizes this. So does the tendency of girls at Mom's Friend's
House to wear as trophies drying trickles of semen on their
faces, breasts and pubic hair. I think many girls and women
resented the rule against masturbation because they wanted to see
semen erupting from a penis. (That said, the admonition we would
hear was "Use your mouth too, not just your hands! -- caressing
and fondling were certainly not discouraged, it's just that they
should not be done to the extent of provoking the ejaculation
without using lips and tongue, and that the semen should be
collected in your mouth to be swallowed.) The final mystery of
sex for girls in the waiting period for coming out, between the
start of hormonal changes and the appearance of pubic hair and
the start of periods, is the nature of ejaculation. They might
see drops, drips and trickles of semen but unless they happened
to be present when an older girl chose to make a show of
ejaculation by keeping the head of her boy's penis exposed when
running her tongue around it, one could only guess at the nature
of the "happening", the surge of semen at boy's orgasm.

The availability of a boy of that age had the result of enabling
younger girls to find a partner within 10% of their age. I think
it may have been a judgment on Mom's Friend's part that too many
11- and 12-year-old girls who were perhaps physically ready but
were emotionally unsuitable for regular sex were competing for
this boy and for a couple of 12-year-old boys and she decided to
restrict coming-out parties and public deflorations to girls of
13 and above. Much of the time when he had sex there would be an
unusually large group of boys and girls of 11, 12 and 13
watching, including kids who normally would not have shown any
interest in teens having sex. This must have aroused them, or
some of them, and led to precocious sex although I don't have any
numbers to prove it. One girl of 14, a talented artist, or so
made a whole portfolio of sketches of the Big Penis in various
stages of rest and of sexual activity.

What I can testify to, however, is that several mothers could be
seen coaching their underage and unsuitable but technically
eligible (i.e., perhaps 10 years old and with bits of breasts and
bits of pubic hair) daughters in oral sex. Mostly, such girls
would ignore, or at least feign ignoring, their mothers and
elders having sex. Now a mother would have her daughter nearby
while she played with the penis of one of those college boys or
older men. She would explain the parts of the penis and the best
way to excite it, and how to handle ejaculation and to maximize
the pleasure of cunnilingus. She would, typically, show her
daughter how to make herself irresistible, how to press her lips
against the penis, how never to let her tongue lose contact with
it, and how to aim the penis so that it would ejaculate nicely
into her mouth and the semen collect under her tongue. I would be
surprised if this sort of conduct didn't encourage a girl to
start oral sex on the sly.

The issue of underage girls was more important than it might seem
at first glance. There was, at Mom's Friend's House as in wider
society, a problem concerning sexually-charged young boys whose
reach exceeds their grasp: who "need" sex but whose puberty is
delayed, whose penises are not "competitive" in maturity, in
size. During my year living on the houseboat and seducing young
boys at the pier I had oral sex with my share of pubescent boys,
some of whom had only just begun puberty. Mom didn't like it if I
targeted a boy who hadn't yet started to develop. Also, when a
girl is fellating a boy she wants the reward of semen at the end.
(I dismiss those girls who spit it out as akin to sex workers,
not lovers.) The converse of the disappointment in making love to
a boy before spermarche (or, more exactly, before he is producing
quantities of semen or seminal fluid) is that one may be there to
enjoy the first drops that he does produce, and to teach him
something about girl technology in the process.

We know that millions of boys start masturbating before age 11;
these days it's common to start as early as age 9 or 10. Mom's
Friend's rule was that a boy had to have pubic hair to have sex,
but more important was the rule that it had to be consensual,
meaning that the boy had to have an urge for sex and not be
cajoled or taunted or teased into doing so. The arrival of the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis changed the playing field, but
perhaps not the way one would expect: it increased awareness of
sexuality, and gave an urgency and a willingness to risk denial
to some boys who might otherwise not have dared try to seduce
because of "shame" or "shyness" related to penile size. The
result was that we did see more sex, especially oral sex,
involving boys (especially) in earlier stages of development. At
least for a time: the trend lasted only so long as the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis was, in fact, 11 and 12 years
old. Once he was 13 his penis could scarcely be differentiated
from that of his peers; only his reputation, his past, his
historical baggage were different.

I spoke several times to the 11-Year-Old-Boy about his thoughts
concerning our theology. As he came not from any religious
motivation but as a matter of sex therapy (and as I said there
was a Jewish connection, something which brings to mind the line
I once heard in made-for-television movie whose title I've
forgotten, "I want to suck your big, circumcised Jewish dick!")
his attitude and his needs were quite different from most of the
rest of us. He himself averred that he was a "sex addict" who
needed sex twice a day. (Does sex addiction really exist or is it
a publicity stunt for celebrities? Is the 11-Year-Old-Boy with
the Big Penis "addicted" because so many moms pushed their
daughters his way, eager to see his penis pushing into their
vaginas? It is certainly true that sexy teenyboppers seemed to
appear from nowhere, accompanied by their moms, to prance nude
around the 11-Year-Old-Boy.)

The house rules that most troubled him were those forbidding
masturbation (I think he did it anyway) and having sex with only
one girl in any 24-hour period. Certainly he did not like the
same-age rule, and I think he broke that one quite often too,
although as far as I know not by so much that he violated the
state's Romeo and Juliet Law. Whether or not he accepted sex as a
religious expression -- and I suppose he might have after being
immersed in the concept and rewarded for observing our protocol
-- he did accept the role of semen as an essential exchange
between boy and girl and the DNA of our ancestors and did not
hesitate, as some outside boys do, to kiss a girl who has his
semen, or traces of it, still in her mouth and on her lips. Mom's
Friend's view was that there is "no such thing" as a sex addict;
that before marriage one can have as much sex as one like and
that in choosing a mate one just has to find a partner with
compatible desires. Celebrities, who often marry for business
reasons, don't consider that when they marry, it would seem.

This, I think, goes to one of Mom's Friend's more important
points: the earlier that an adolescent is when she or he becomes
sexually active with partners of the same age the less inhibited
that person will be. There is another point too: since the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis was so cute, seated as he
always was (and as Mom's Friend wanted her kids to be) with his
legs well apart and his penis and his scrotum in easy view, girls
of all ages had an urge to excite and satisfy him sexually.
Unlike mainstream naturist communities, Mom's Friend's House did
not frown on or criticize, much less prohibit public displays of
arousal or affection. It pleased girls to provoke boys' penises
-- especially that of the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis --
to erection. It pleased me too, and I was glad that he let me
come up close to admire it. Very close. Enough said.

Suffice to say, after the initial session between the
11-Year-Old-Boy and Terrific Girl, and the ensuing weeks when he
became acclimatized to our community, his mom showed him off to
the mothers of girls, promoting him like a celebrity. This was
not entirely new: many mothers put their sons forward as
candidates for presiding at a defloration party. It's a vicarious
maternal-feminist-control thing, I think. And I guess being
behind the appearance of those teenyboppers. It was all quite
endearing, the more so because the mothers of girls were so eager
to bring their daughters forth to size him up, so to speak, and
to play with him. That, in fact, highlights an issue of some
importance that was arising exactly at that time and which led to
the "suggested" 13-year-old minimum age for coming out.

I, as regular readers will know, came out sort of "by accident"
at age 11-1/2 when a boy tumbled on top of me while we were
tussling, both naked, and before I knew it his penis was inside
my vagina. I was, however, 13, almost 14 before Mom and I moved
to Mom's Friend's House and I had no trouble integrating with the
community. For a while I had a relationship with the
"16-Year-Old-Boy", Mom's Friend's nephew. That violated the
same-age rule, but nobody ever said anything, probably because it
would have been neither politic nor expedient.

Bear in mind the following: average age of menarche is 12, and of
spermarche 14. The lag between the two, even allowing for fact
that half of boys and girls would reach sexual maturity a year or
so before and even granting the 10% rule, meant that many girls
of 12 were eager to come out but there were no appropriate boys
for them. And once they did come out they might have inadequate
opportunity for sex -- the more so since girls outnumbered boys
at various times from 1.5 to 2.0 to 1.

Mom's Friend had always maintained a rule against shaving pubic
hair ("a Muslim custom and let them have it", she said; there are
also health issues:
http://www.thepost.ohiou.edu/Articles/Culture/2007/09/20/21273 ).
She thought fluffy pubic hair a thing of beauty; and it is
certainly true that boys of 12 to 15, largely without body hair
except for penis and underarms, make a nice picture. Granted that
girls started to come to terms with their sexuality long before
menarche -- from age 10 I should think -- and that many of them
were fully capable of sex by 11, the sight of a boy who was
physically capable of making love and an eligible partner under
Mom's Friend's rules meant that he would be surrounded by eager
girls. Girls who would have grown up with every expectation of
oral sex and as critical eye to penile development. The sight of
the 11-Year-Old's penis should have made them want to play with
it, to put it in their mouths, to experiment with it. And why
not?

While the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis denied it, and so
did all the younger girls, it is quite possible that he engaged
in oral sex with some of them, even before they would come out
publicly. The only measure I have of that is complaints once in a
while from Terrific Girl and others that the boy was on this or
that occasion non-responsive to their seductive invitations.

The foregoing, as I said, led to a crisis for Mom's Friend was
already worried about possible denunciation by this or that
ex-member of the community and public agitation over perceptions
of child sexual abuse in American society were getting louder,
even if no more substantiated than ever before. Yet, certainly in
the late 1990s, at the same time open sexuality on TV and film
and open sex on the Internet meant that by the time of their
first pubic hair every boy and girl had access to graphic
illustrations of sex and were developing an innate urgent need
for orgasm. I argued that one could not put a stop to sexuality
expressing itself and that to issue new mandatory norms would
destroy the whole ethos of liberal sexuality inherent in Mom's
and Mom's Friend's theology and drive sex into the shadows.

Ultimately no new rules were issued but "guidance" was given that
mothers should discourage experimentation before age 13 and that
no more defloration parties would be allowed before that age. In
fact those parties were going out of style anyway; girls were
starting with oral sex at age 12, latest, and going on to vaginal
sex at 13. But if a girl of 11 became entranced by some boy's
"blessed triangle" (a term that by itself implied that girls
would limit themselves to boys well into puberty) really there
was no possibility of restraining her. Nudity was too pervasive,
opportunity too much at hand. And the mothers, for the most part,
had no inclination to restrain their daughters, at least those
past menarche, those with breasts big enough to make boys eager.

It was, and is, irresistible: for a girl who has seen, growing
up, the magic that is oral sex leading to vaginal sex and orgasm
and who knows of the penis as her friend, the sight of a young
boy newly arrived at puberty, the sight of his manly triangle and
big penis, the contrast between his black (usually) pubic hair
and light skin and the promise of that penis brings into focus
her own sexuality, her own breasts, her own vagina. And her need
to bring all together and create fun, delight, pleasure, arousal,
excitement, climax. Ejaculation, semen. And, in our ethic,
communion with Jesus.

I think of myself -- was it that long ago? -- just recently past
my 11th birthday, asking that boy who was masturbating in the
chair, "Can I help?" and bringing him to ejaculation, his semen
splashing on my face because I hadn't planned for it. In Mom's
Friend's House I would have been better prepared; but then he
wouldn't have been masturbating publicly either. Can anyone be
surprised that, having seen so many times Mom's obvious pleasure
taking a penis into her mouth and making it ejaculate I would
begin to wonder whether I shouldn't be doing the same? How many
pubic hairs did I have? How much had my breasts grown? How needy
was I for the closeness of sex? For gorgeous penises to play
with? With that in my past I understood it when, in those years
while the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis was among us, girls
felt an urge to put his big penis in their mouth, and he had a
different girl to make love to every day of the week. And the
others would watch, and not mind at all, not be jealous: because
that's the way they had been raised, that's the rule Rev. X and
Mom's Friend had inculcated in them. And how lovely it is to
banish vanity, jealousy, Shakespearean rage, and as many of the
Seven Deadly Sins as we can.

By the way: those who would say that the kind of free love
growing-up that my Mom and her coterie of friends promoted,
drawing from the CoG of years before, damage the psyche of
children and make them sex criminals when they are older should
take note of the present status of the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the
Big Penis, now a medical student, and so many of the girls to
whom he made love, one of whom is now a successful politician, a
winner of elections as a Democrat in classically Red state.
Others are law students and worse.

Breasts. If the lovely, holy triangle of passion is the symbol of
manly romance the reciprocal is the incitement, excitement of boy
passion by bringing nude breasts into his personal space.
Terrific Girl, with her silver-dollar nipples and nice if not
huge breasts was ideally placed to test the lust and the passion
of the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis. But before passing
judgment, have a look at a book written by a Times of London
staffer during a workers' strike in the 1970s: "Domes of
Fortune", why breasts are so important:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Domes-Fortune-Alan-Brien/dp/0704332787
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/obituaries/article400372
3.ece
But now hear this: the sexiest and most delicate breasts I've
ever seen were on the body of a Jewess. How does that relate? I
saw the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis making love to her,
and it was fantastic, his semen spurting into her and then
dripping out. But where does that leave Jesus? She did not share
our faith; her only connection being her Mom's ex. We shall have
to look into this.

Much as the story and the lessons of Terrific Girl and of the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis are heartwarming and lovely,
reflections of the last years of Mom's Friend's experiment in
religion-based sexual liberality for pubescent and adolescent
boys and girls, there may be a more important message. I
mentioned the Mrs. Robinson phenomenon where mothers of some of
the very kids who were cavorting in sex were seducing and being
seduced by 19+ year old boys, those who had "graduated" from the
nude dance parties and were in the last years of college. I like
to think that the respect and reciprocity shown by these boys was
a product of their growing up in our environment. These women
had, for the most part, been in the CoG or in various sexually
liberal communes. They were without inhibition; excited like the
audience at a Chippendales event, only these women did not need
to limit their antics to stuffing banknotes into g-strings: they
were free to stroke and to caress and to fondle: to lower the
underpants of a target boy and to play with his penis.

I don't know how many affairs resulted; I do know of one or two
pregnancies; there probably were more. By the time I was 16
though, I really had little interest in watching 12 to
14-year-old girls fumbling with penises and I had more in common
with adults and with college-age girls. It had occurred to me
that women over 35 have a sexual need and a sexual ability that
transcends triviality and superficiality. To see a 35- or a
40-year old woman playing with a college boy's penis and
experimenting with different tongue strokes to make the boy crazy
with delight. And then to make his semen catapult into their
mouth. They are, I think, sending a message to their daughters,
and even to their sons, that they are not over yet, that sex is
not a teenage thing but something for life. As well as giving
life in the first place.

I can envisage my Mom sitting on the lap of one of the older
boys, her legs straddling his, and his fingers cuddling and
caressing her vagina. As I read my diary now, I see a note that
she told him that if he kept it up that would be masturbating and
that instead he should put his penis in. But he didn't want to
wear a condom (which as regular readers will know, all the boys
were supposed to wear once they began having sex outside the
safe, enclosed community), so she put his penis in her mouth
instead. After a while he ejaculated in quantity and Mom couldn't
keep it all in her mouth and it spilled down his penis and onto
his balls and pubic hair. And, smiling, Mom didn't want to waste
any, so she licked and sucked it all up. And then the boy
reciprocated with her, his tongue lapping at her pink vagina and
up and around her clitoris until she made loud noises of
pleasure. And then, in violation of everything, I saw his penis
in her vagina after all. Mom didn't wash for the rest of the day:
she wore dried semen on her body as a badge of pleasure. The next
day I saw the boy consorting with college girls of his own age;
Mom smiled at them all and, now showered and fresh and clothed,
wore her memories as a medal. It is wonderful when a girl or
woman can walk about with pride in her own community, all those
she passes knowing that she enjoys romance and passion, everybody
having seen her making love to a penis and receiving its
blessing, its semen. In fact, all the boys and men Mom made love
to would be likely to remember her as she made a point, whenever
she had a penis ejaculate in her mouth, to keep enough semen in
her mouth to share with its donor when she would kiss him
afterwards.

(For my Mom, these are fond memories. She's disabled now and
hasn't had sex in a couple of years. I wonder: how tragic is
that? Is the denial of sex worse for men than for women?)

I can understand Mom's pride in showing off the traces of her
lovemaking. A lot of times, as a young teen, I've pranced around
outdoors at Mom's Friend's House with semen still dripping from
my vagina, hoping people would notice, sharing smiles when they
did.

The presence of the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis and of the
girls within his "same-age" cohort vying for his attentions was
mirrored by the contest among the middle-aged moms for the
attentions of the college boys. I think this was a good thing:
suddenly women were going to the gym; their bodies were
competitively presented. The women with the nicest boobs, the
most promising vaginas and the most interesting personalities set
the pace for what we -- girls lower down the food chain, so to
speak; or just younger and still working towards our missions in
life and our places in society -- could aspire to. And it
reminded us that, as I said before, we will be charmed by penises
like that of the 11-Year-Old forever.

I think, in retrospect, that the cult of youth, invented and
perpetuated by advertisers on behalf of peddlers of fake youth,
is evil. Until she became disabled, I saw my Mom present her
breasts and her vagina to countless men of her own, and of
younger ages. There was real beauty to her sex parts, greater
beauty even when they were in proximity to a penis; greatest of
all when they were drenched in semen. So was it with all the
other moms at Mom's Friend's House when, spirited by the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis -- a symbolic renewal of all
of them, I think -- they rediscovered their own deflorations,
their own discovery of sex and of sex as evangelism and as a
gateway to Jesus.

Dear Reader: think of your own mom, needful of fulsome romance
and passion, eager for a big penis to dance for her. Think of a
devout man, devoted to God and, for now, to her, kissing now on
the lips, now on the vagina, offering her his penis for
lovemaking; and think of semen streaming into her mouth as, with
his tongue he brings her to ecstasy. Such a lovely thought; such
a wholesome, holistic, holy making of love and testimony to
Jesus's power. And to make love to a penis in homage to a new
generation coming up, in response to arousal at the sight of the
11-Year-Old-Boy with the Big Penis and, say, Terrific Girl with
the fine breasts and the sensuous technique and a real
appreciation for religiosity as a part of sex: that is the
epitome of life everlasting and love eternal.

I hope you understand.

Love,
Carol


P.S.: One of the unfortunate consequences of the modern failure
to distinguish (as we are seeing in the matter of the
Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints and other recent
cases) between religious-based sexual mores and pure child abuse
is that the Authorities are willy-nilly targeting sexual activity
by minors. Mom's Friend's commune is closed; the free-sex
communities I've seen have either gone abroad or abandoned
parental oversight and left the teaching and the supervision to
the teens themselves. More's the pity: I know that I benefited
from Mom being there when I was experimenting with sex; and I
know that Terrific Girl and all my other friends were kept safe
by the fact of Mom's Friend being around. And all of us were
charmed and inspired at the sight of the 11-Year-Old-Boy with the
Big Penis. Sexual activity by teens is more, not less, common now
than ten years ago, and we should all regret that Mom's Friend's
rules on same-age, consensual, safe sex despite having so much to
recommend them, are (like sex ed generally under the Religious
Right and the Sarah Palin constituency) targeted as the cause of,
or the encouragement of, "sin" rather than as matters of health,
safety, welfare and pleasure. And, above all, recognition that to
make love is to obey God's command; that puberty brings with it a
sacred obligation to make love and to propagate the faith, to be
seen pursuing orgasm.

PP.S.: While the First Amendment and the lapse of time (nothing
in these stories happened less than ten years ago, everybody is
now an adult and, as far as I am aware, happy with her (or his)
early sexual awakening, I bring to your attention, Dear Reader, a
recent prosecution in England for an Internet account of a
totally imaginary story:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tyne/7649231.stm ("A civil
servant is being prosecuted over an internet blog which detailed
the kidnap, torture and murder of the pop group Girls Aloud.") I
have repeatedly said that my essays are the embellished
compilations of historically factual events, buttressed by
references to the theological, philosophical and legal issues
behind them. And so they are. Today, as I have also said, it is
less safe and hence less common for mothers to be present for
their daughters' deflorations. But many girls still choose to
come out with friends around: the tradition lives on. And in most
places from age 16 on there is no risk of State involvement in
consensual, same-age sex in front of the parents. It is, after
all, unthinkable in this day and age that a liberal boy or girl
will still be a virgin at 16. And given the opportunity to show
that she is not, to play with a penis, to make it ejaculate for
her and to enjoy its semen and to be recognized for her
sensuality properly aware girls will do as we did at all those
nude dance parties: dance, exchange oral sex, and at the moment
of their orgasms take their boy's penis in their vagina for all
their friends to admire. Just as at the coming-out parties, the
nicest position is when the girl is on a bed or soft table, her
friends help her lift her legs high, and the boy, after kissing
and exciting her vagina and clitoris rises up and puts in penis
inside, and manages his movements so we see the head of his penis
from time to time, and so that we get to see the semen when it
comes. And then the girl demands to see the penis up close and
kiss it and put it in her mouth and taste the semen that has
blessed her.




_________________________________________________________________
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