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From: "Stasya T. Canine" <stasyatk9@juno.MUNGED.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} NEW <*> Biolab 69 - Bio Partners - Sascha and Robert 1/? Sascha! (M-Bitch zoo/best)
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Date: Tue, 17 Jun 2008 09:10:01 -0400
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Released to the public domain 
-------

Biolab 69 - Sascha and Robert
Sascha!
----

I was groggy and my thoughts were muddled as I regained consciousness.  When
I tried to move my legs the sudden pain made me scream.  The adrenalin rush
brought me the rest of the way awake--and I realized I hurt all over, not
just in my legs.

I was alive, after all.  Tim!  Where was Tim?  I rolled my head back and
forth, seeking until I spotted a bloody, headless pile of golden fur.  

I moaned as the emotional pain swept through me, leaving emptiness in its
wake.  

Then I cried.

I wished I'd been killed, too.  Without Tim's always cheerful canine
smile--and his love, I had nothing to live for.

When I wasn't fighting off the waves of pain, I was trying to understand what
had just happened.

BP medical teams are, even when we are under contract to act as scouts,
treated as neutral non-combatants.

When we'd stopped to treat the battle casualties we'd stumbled across, we'd
called our position in.  

Minutes later, the artillery had come screaming in, as if we'd been
deliberately targeted.

It wasn't supposed to happen.

It shouldn't have happened...

At that point in my thinking I was distracted by a pain filled whine.  

Sascha and Illya!  I'd forgotten about them!

I looked around, trying to locate either one of them.

Nothing.

Again, the whine and this time, words.  'Illya.  No.  Come on.  You can't be
dead...'

I winced at the pain in Sascha's low voiced protest, then remembered more of
what had been going on when the artillery strike had landed on us.

Sascha and Illya had been tending their wounded, just as Tim and I had been
tending ours.  Then, the unforgettable sound of incoming shells...

And darkness.

I heard the whine again, and the plea.

I needed to distract her, so I found the strength to force out her name.
"Sascha!"  I knew it had been the barest of whispers, but I was counting on
her ears, and her training.

The whine stopped.  "Robert?"

"Yeah.  Are you OK?"

There was a long silence.  Then...  "Illya's dead.  Everyone else is dead,
too.  I couldn't save any of them.  I couldn't save *him*."

I winced at the lost sound in her voice.  "I'm sorry.  It looks like Tim
never had a chance.  I hope..."  I took a deep breath.  "I hope he never felt
it."

"What about you?"

I sighed.  She would ask me that.  "I can't move.  Both legs..."

I felt a nose touch my cheek in a familiar gesture but the voice that
followed wasn't Tim's.  "I can see that."

"Can you do anything?"

She settled next to me.  "Depends on the damage.  Some shrapnel destroyed my
waldo.  That's what saved me.  I'm only bruised."

I sighed and she responded by resting her chin on my chest and whimpering. "I
could have saved him if my waldo hadn't been destroyed."

I reached and stoked her great head.  "I'm sorry, Sascha.  Stay with me?"

"No.  I'll go get help.  Will you wait for me to get back?"

I sighed.  "Give me a reason.  I lost Tim."

"I lost Illya.  I don't want to lose you, too.  Can you sit up if I help?"

I gaped at her, then started laughing bitterly.  I had to quit before the
pain made me pass out.  "Sascha.  I'm gay.  And yeah, I might be able to do
that."

"Good.  I'll bring what we need and you can help me put on the tourniquets."

She was gentle while we struggled to stop as much off my bleeding as we
could.  I was amazed at how much she could do with her teeth and paws.  I
really think she could have done it all by herself if she'd had to, but in a
strange way, we both needed to save my life.

Maybe it was some sort of weird bonding ritual because we were both battle
casualties.

Whatever it was, when we finished I was pretty certain I wanted to live,
because she wanted me to.  She'd babbled about her past with Illya while she
worked and by the time we were done, I knew how important I was to her, now.

Without me, there would be nothing in her life she felt strongly enough to go
on living for.  I also knew I was starting to feel the same way about her.

Once she was satisfied there was no more we could do, she stood over me and
lifted her lips in a slight smile.  "I don't think you're gay.  My nose tells
me you aren't.   Anyway, I'm willing to take the time to find out."

Another wave of pain knifed through me and I shuddered and gasped until it
subsided a little.  "Tim never mentioned I might not be gay."

"He wouldn't.  Goldens are like that.  We Rotts are more pragmatic.  Will you
stay alive, now?  For us?"

I sighed and looked away from her worried eyes.  "Do I have a choice?"

"Yes.  But if you let yourself die, Illya and Tim will have died for nothing.
So will we, because I don't plan on outliving you by longer than it takes me
to suicide.  Without you..."

I nodded tiredly.  "You've made your points, Sascha.  I'll hang on."  I
touched her nose lightly.  "When I'm able, be gentle, OK?  I've never been
with a female."

She nuzzled my cheek.  "I'm violent enough for both of us, Robert.  But, in
some things, I have always been gentle."

She looked at me through pain filled eyes.  "Robert?  You're sure?  You'll
wait for me to bring help back?"  She was repeating herself a lot, but I
wasn't in any shape to keep track so I could mention it.  

Besides, I wasn't exactly tracking well myself.  All I could think about was
Tim's body, and the fact we'd never be together again. 

I winced, more from my own pain than hers.  "Yeah, Sascha."  I took a deep
breath.  "Tim would have wanted me to keep going...  Get the hell out of here
and let someone know what's happened..."

I hesitated and then managed to get my next words past my tears.  "Partner,
do what you have to do.  OK?"

Her head tilted in inquiry before she smiled bitterly.  "Though we may die in
the attempt to succeed in our duties, we will die knowing our deaths meant
something."

I nodded.  It was part of the Bio Mate's bonding oath.  "Go, my future love.
Give our lives meaning again."

She nuzzled my cheek gently, then she was gone and all I could do was watch
her powerful body lunge across the broken ground in an all out run.

I drifted in and out and was mostly out when she returned, guiding an evac
team.  I winced when I recognized the unmistakable combat biosuits worn by
the elite BPS combat teams.  Sascha must have been eloquent, even for her.
Those folks seldom got involved in the petty disputes the Bio Partners
usually found themselves mixed up in.

"What are you folks doing here?"

The woman laughed grimly.  "Sorting some folks out.  We lost one of our teams
here.  Hate to say it, but one of our enemies doesn't care about incidental
casualties if they get some of us at the same time."

"Shit."  Then I remembered something.  There'd been more pain in Sascha's
whine than would be caused by bruising.  "How's Sascha?"

"She's OK.  Rotts are almost as tough as wolves.  Cracked ribs but all she
wanted was some pain killers until we got back to you."

I sighed.  "Me?"  They'd been working on me and I was floating outside the
pain, finally.

"Depends on you.  We can save everything, but you'll never be quite as agile
as you were.  Worry about it later.  You'll have plenty of time for that
while you recover and go through rehab."

I nodded tiredly.   "Thanks..."  I felt a sting and that was it.

* * *

When I woke up I found myself staring at a white ceiling, the kind I had
usually seen when we brought in patients.  It was obvious I was in a
hospital.

"Welcome back, Robert."  It was Sascha's voice, but it was curiously muffled.
"The bed controls are next to your right hand.  *Those*, at least, are
standard."

"Sascha?  Something's wrong with your voice."

I fumbled, found the controls and went through the litany I was used to
giving others.  Right.  Let's see if using them was as easy as I'd been
telling people.  I managed to raise myself until I could get a better view of
the room I was in.

It didn't *look* like any hospital room I'd ever seen and my jaw sagged when
I recognized a BP Security biosuit.  "Is that you, Sascha?"

"Yes.  It was the easiest way to immobilize everything while my ribs heal.
That sprint to get help didn't improve things."  I heard a faint whir of
motors as her head tilted slightly.  "Saved your life, though."

"Thanks."

"None needed.  Without you, I would have suicided."

"Yeah.  I remember you talking about that."

"Don't worry about it.  Think about us."

I finally looked at my covered legs.  "Looks like I'll have plenty of time
for that.  I miss Tim.  A lot."

"So do I.  I miss Illya.  We were partners since I was a puppy."

I sighed and changed the subject.  "What the hell happened to us, anyway?"

She moved closer and rested her chin on the bed so I could reach her head.  I
smiled a bit sadly and petted her gently.  Eventually she closed her eyes and
sighed.  "BP calls them 'Wolf-Killers'.  They're more than that.  It's a
tightly organized group of people who hate any of the Biolab animals and
teams.  Mostly, they go after the security folks but when they found out they
had three teams in the same area, they leveled it and traded a suicide team
for the chance to get us all."

"Damn.  How come I've never heard of them?"

She opened her eyes in surprise.  "You didn't know?"

"Tim and I were medics.  This was only the second time we contracted to scout
and our first in such a hot combat zone.  We spent most of our lives since
training providing escort and medical support for survey missions."  I let
some of my anger show in my voice.  "Nobody told us there were folks who
ignored the protocols.  If we'd known, we wouldn't have been there."

She sighed.  "Illya and I knew about the Wolf Killers.  Unfortunately there
was an emergency call for a combat trained team, and we were available.  As
far as we knew, the Wolf Killers weren't in the area, so I accepted the
contract."

There was a cynical weariness in her next words.  "This isn't my first time
in a Biosuit.  I seem to have a knack for picking the wrong assignments. Last
time, I was nearly killed.  This time I lost Illya."

She closed her eyes and fell silent for a long time, whimpered some and then
licked my hand.  "I'm glad you were there, Robert."

The pain in her voice made me wince again.  "Yeah.  Life is hell sometimes.
Thanks, Sascha, for saving my life.  I guess we'll find a way.  I don't know
about you, but I don't want to do any more scouting if I can avoid it."

Someone turned on the room light and then came over to study us.  "That
sounds like a good entrance line.  Sascha, Robert.  I'm Jack and this,"  he
gestured at the largest Doberman I'd ever seen, "is Duke.  If you two are
interested, we have a job offer."

I looked at my new partner.  "Sascha?"

She shrugged with her ears.  "If it doesn't involve hot combat zones, I'm
interested.  That's assuming I've fulfilled my previous contract and I'm
otherwise available.  Robert?"

"Yeah.  I just woke up so I don't know if I'm actually available yet.
Although..."  I winced and went on.  "With Tim dead, I suppose his
obligations are moot unless there's an idiot out there who wants me to finish
out our contract.

"May I interrupt?"

We both turned our heads to study Duke.

"You're free, and already registered as a convalescing team."

Sascha said it for both of us.  "Someone worked fast."

He nodded.  "We did.  Of course..."  His sudden grin unnerved me.  "Both
sides agreed that the consequences they already faced wouldn't be improved if
they insisted on holding you to your contracts after what happened."

I goggled.  How had they managed to break what had to be one of the most
stringent performance contracts written for the BP teams?

I felt Sascha's head shift as she moved to stare at him and inhale through
her nose.  "I remember you.  You went berserk and got yourself retired from
field work."

While she and Duke studied each other, I kept my mouth shut.  Something odd
was going on and there was no way I wanted to be in the middle.  I'd seen the
vids of fully operational biosuits and their destructive capability  when
worn by an experienced operator was enough to make me wish I was a long way
away and running fast, not confined to a support bed.  To make it worse,
Sascha was quivering enough that I could hear the servos as they reacted to
her jittery 'almost movements'.

He settled on his haunches.  "I did.  BP Security made us an offer we
couldn't refuse.  We're in charge of the new diplomatic division.  We're also
very interested in recruiting you as a team.

"Are you interested in learning how to go pick up the pieces or, preferably,
stop things before there are any pieces to pick up?  One of the perks is
living 24/7 with your own BPS bodyguard teams."

I spoke up.  "Where are yours, then?"

Jack gave me a one word answer.  "Discreet."  Then he followed it up.  "And
keeping yours company."

"Oh.  Yeah.  Fanatics, right?"

Jack continued his briefing.  "Yep.  The Wolf-Killers are slow to learn but
they do learn, eventually.  They prefer easier targets, when all's said and
done.  Besides, people who kill accredited diplomats find it difficult to
find new recruits.  Not to mention the fact these folks aren't so fanatical
they want to find themselves involved in a BPS vendetta.  Anyway, regardless,
protecting diplomats is a protocol even the terrorists and fanatics honor
these days."

I nodded thoughtfully.  Then my medical training kicked in and I realized how
odd this was for me, personally.  "Wait.  I shouldn't be this alert."  I
turned to Sascha.  "Why am I thinking so well?  I should be dopey and not
tracking all this."

She sneezed.  "You've been in and out of it for the last month.  It's about
time you came out of it completely."

"A month?"

"Since they woke you up the first time."

I sighed.  "Enough games.  How long has it been?"

She settled her head on the bed with a drawn out sigh.  "Just over two
months.  You were a mess."

"Oh."  I touched her head lightly.  "Well?  You're the one in charge of the
team.  Tell me what we're going to be doing."

She was silent a long time.  Then she closed her eyes and whispered:
"Learning a new career.  I'm tired of being one of the pieces--and even more
tired of spending time in this damn Biosuit while I recover from finding
myself in situations I didn't create."

Duke came over and put his front feet on the bed, opposite where Sascha had
her head, then leaned across my body to nuzzle her.  "Thanks."  

He pulled back and gave us both the stunningly evil grin again.  

"Diplomatic Lesson One:  The more unpleasant the option you're discussing,
the bigger your grin.  Take advantage of the fact people automatically assume
teams that have survived combat are dedicated killers.  Don't waste your time
trying to prove otherwise.  They'll never believe it, even if they have full
access to your records.  Who's going to believe a 150 pound Rott in the prime
of her life--is a pacifist?  Makes about as much sense as a Diplomatic
Doberman, doesn't it?"

He laughed, then with casual power pushed himself away from the bed and
headed for the door.  Jack joined him and as they went through the door he
casually shut off the main lights.

"That,"  I observed, "is a dog I never want to see angry.  Handsome though."

Sascha sneezed her agreement.  "When he thought a Wolf-Killer had killed Jack
he shredded her throat, then ripped her body into pieces.  Very small pieces.
The final result was extremely messy."

I'd heard about Dobermans and their agile lethalness.  Duke's grin had made
me shudder, even though I'd known it was friendly and not a combat reaction.
What she'd just told me about his past only confirmed what I had heard from
combat vets over the years, and reminded me that I wanted no part of actual
combat--or its aftermath--ever again.

That thinking reminded me of what I'd shared with Tim, and how I'd lost it
all because we'd decided to go where we felt we were needed most, this time,
instead of sticking to our usual routine of only taking the safe assignments.

Sascha's laugh pulled me out of my despondency.

I glared at her.  "What's so funny?"

"You are.  The drugs you're on are supposed to temporarily eliminate your sex
drive.  You reek of testosterone.  Besides, those two are monogamous."

I sighed.  "Is it OK for me to dream?"

"Wouldn't you prefer some reality?"

"In a hospital?"

She pulled her head back so she could study me.  "This isn't a normal
hospital.  We're in a room that's part of the BP team recovery facility."

"So?"

She grinned at me.  "So there are options available here that aren't
available to the general public."

She made the odd head twist I recognized as the activation signal for the
waldos on her suit.  Without moving from where she was, she used them to open
one of the drawers built into the bed, then reached in and lifted out a field
emergency kit.

At least that's what I thought it was at first.  When she set it on my chest
and I got a look at the labeling, I started laughing.  I couldn't help it.
There, in bright red, were the male and female symbols, linked together.
There was also a stylized human and a stylized canid.

"Sascha...  Sex toys for zoos?  You're kidding, right?"

"No.  This is the basic kit, complete with wireless interactive feedback.
There's a sleeve and a dildo.  You wear one, I insert the other."

She looked at me.  "We can use these, or I can sit on you.  Biosuits have an
override circuit included that can be enabled for sexual situations."

"Sascha, there's no way I want my first time to be anything other than with
the real thing."

I smiled at her.  "Move your head so I can get this blanket off me.  You say
I've been here two months, and I'm supposed to be on suppressants, yet I reek
of testosterone?  I haven't abstained that long since I discovered
masturbation."

She moved and I flipped the blanket away.  I looked down at my flaccid penis
and sighed.  "I'm a bottom.  I don't know if I can penetrate you."

She moved her head back next to my crotch and sniffed deeply.  "You let me
worry about that problem.   My preference is to be cuddled, and fucking while
we're on our sides facing each other, but Illya and I did spend time
exploring other methods..."

I flinched a little when her tongue first touched me, then I felt the
stirrings that told me my penis was willing to take note of what was going
on.  Her tonguing got more enthusiastic and I responded.  At least I still
worked.  That was nice to know.  As for the rest of it?

Only time would tell.

I'll say this much.  We tried.  I should say Sascha tried, since there wasn't
much I could do to help.

Unfortunately, every time she moved so I could line up and penetrate her, I
went limp.  With all the drugs in my system, and the experience being so
unfamiliar, there was no way to figure out the real reason I was unable to
fuck her.

After the fourth try I sighed and told her to give up for now.  We settled
for a 69, and then she carefully stretched out next to me for a cuddle that
was more unsatisfying than the sex because she was in the biosuit, but at
least we were next to each other.

"How much longer will you be in that suit?"

"Couple weeks."

"K.  I think it's mostly the suit.  I'm used to the tactile feedback.  I need
the feedback from your body, I think.  This felt..."  I searched for the
right words and winced when I found them.  "Sorry about this:  'Too
mechanical'."

I went on slowly, remembering what had been, and trying to see a future. "Tim
and I never did learn how to use the biosuits.  All he ever trained with was
the waldos.  Sometimes we made love while he was wearing his, but most of the
time he was naked.  I needed to know it was him mounting me.  His fur... His
weight..."

I lost it and cried myself to sleep.

When I woke, Sascha was gone from the bed. "Sascha?"

"Over here, Love."

I positioned the bed and myself so I could see her.  She had the biosuit
locked and she was standing there, gazing out the window at the night.

"What time is it?"

"Late.  Are you ready to try eating something?  They said you can try some
solid food."

I thought about it.  "Maybe later."

She nodded.  "I've been thinking about what happened this afternoon."

I sighed.  "And?"

"I did some checking.  There's a solution, if you're willing to try something
new.  It will be a new experience for me, too.  We can't try it until you get
out of that bed and the doctors ok you for some physical activity."

I looked at myself and sighed.  "I'm not used to celibacy, and I want to be
your full partner.  If you've found us a way...  Yeah, I'm willing to try
it."

She came over and settled her head on my chest.  "I'm not used to being
celibate this long, either.  Illya and I were pure het so there are a lot of
alternatives we never knew about.  After you went to sleep I did some
research into the alternative sexualities, and the solutions they've found."

I studied her.  I recognized that serious but whimsical tone.  It seemed to
be, as far as I could tell, a sense of humor all the biostruct canids shared.
"Am I going to like any of these 'solutions'?"

"Maybe."  She turned slightly and showed me a grin.  "I know I'm going to
enjoy the experimenting.  They sound like fun."

I shuddered.  "OK.  I know what 'fun' means when I say it.  You?"

She laughed and came over to the bed, then settled her chin on my thigh.
"Incredibly erotic.  I had trouble believing some of the toys the teams have
designed over the years.  Would you believe there's a special strap on double
dildo for bitches, with wireless feedback and double sets of sensors so both
partners can share what's happening while she fucks her male or female
partner?  The full kit lets the user decide what penis style she wants to
use, dog or human, in either position.  There's a slip on knot and penis ring
a man can wear.  There's also a sleeve that can be linked to either or both
of the dildos on the double so the wearer of the sleeve can feel as if he's
fucking himself, or the bitch--or both at the same time."

She paused and shifted so she could watch my face.  When she continued it was
wistfully.   "I wish I'd known..." 

"What?"

"There are custom molded prosthetics that  a man or dog can wear when they
want to impregnate their female partner with semen donated by someone else."

She sighed.  "Illya and I never knew..."

"Oh."  I reached and stroked the exposed portion of her head while I sorted
though the images her words had created in my mind.

Finally it came down to one set of images.  "So there's a way for you to be
top to my bottom, and use my penis to help satisfy your own desires at the
same time?

"Yes."

My fingers stilled while I thought some more.  Then, firmly:  "Hopefully,
someday, I'll be able to fuck you for real.  In the meantime, let's
experiment.  I really do need to be a bottom."

"I know.  Just remind yourself of this:  You're not really a gay bottom.  My
nose says you're a slightly transgendered bisexual, if you'll give yourself a
chance."

"That's a mouthful.  I've always thought of myself as a gay bottom.  What's
the difference?"

"You're young, yet.  The difference is mindset, I suppose."

"Now, I'm really confused."

She faced me.  "You see yourself as male, right?  No feelings that you are
wearing the wrong body, gender wise?"

If I could have shrugged, I would have.  "I suppose so.  I enjoy having a
penis and I wouldn't trade it in for a cunt, if that's what you are asking."

"And you did, sometimes, fuck Tim?"

I winced at the memories of what I'd recently lost.  "Yeah.  Quite often,
really.  It's just that...  Most of the time I needed to feel like he was in
charge, taking care of me, and I needed to be protected, loved, and cared
for."

She nodded.  "That's the transgendered part of you, maybe.  If you were
primarily focused on females, I'd be certain.  If it helps any, it's not that
unusual for Bio Partners to change their sexual identity when they change
partners.  We seem to pay even less attention to physical shape as it defines
sexual identity than people who stick to humans.  The current theory is that
once a person internalizes the mindset that ignores physical shape when
choosing a mate, they soon accept that sexual identity isn't fixed by shape,
either."

Her words made some sense but at the time all I could feel was a sense of
loss and failure.  

So, I thought about Tim and lost myself in the memories we'd created
together.  Sascha left me alone and at some point I fell asleep again.

* * *

When I woke up it was daylight.  There was something odd nagging at me,
something I'd sort of noticed the previous day and then forgotten.  I finally
pinpointed it when Sascha came over to my bed.  "Here's your medicine."

I smiled at her whimsically.  "Are you my beautiful nurse, then?"

She sneezed.  "They *do* have other patients, I'm a medic--and most
importantly, I happen to have a personal interest in my current patient."  

She posed for me.  "You'll have to decide if I'm beautiful."

I studied her, then lost some of my whimsical feelings.  There was no point
in lying to her.  "I don't know if you're beautiful, Sascha.  I've never been
interested in bitches enough to know what 'beautiful' means."

Her head sagged briefly, then it came up and tilted slightly while she
studied me.  "I never thought I'd have to explain 'beautiful'.  Do you enjoy
watching me move?"

I smiled.  "Yes."

She nodded.  "And when we cuddled, did you enjoy having me there?"

"Yes, again."

"Then as far as you are concerned, I'm beautiful, and that's good enough for
me."

She said it lightly, but her body language told me she was immensely pleased
with the situation.

I moved the bed over to the window and raised myself until I could look
outside.  "Reminds me of some of our first contracts.  I learned to love
forests and grassy meadows."  I chuckled at a memory.  "We were medics for a
BP survey expedition.  Tim couldn't howl, but he managed to learn how to
croon.  

"Fifteen teams, including us.  The evening serenades were magical.  The party
at the end of the survey was incredible.  Someone decided it should be a
cross between a Roman festival and a medieval tournament.

"Tim and I recorded as much as we could, then the teams contributed stuff
from their combat monitors.  The result is an incredible mix that showcases
both the combat skills of the BP teams and love we all have for each other."

I sighed...  "There was a down side, though.  While were in the area, there
was a supposedly minor earthquake."  I let some of my bitterness show.  "It
was 'minor' only if you didn't live in the area.  Several villages were
destroyed and in one town, most of their animals were killed or seriously
injured when the communal barn collapsed.

"Tim and I lived on stay-awakes for seventy-two hours while we did what we
could.  We all knew it wasn't enough.  There was no way the townspeople would
be able to harvest enough of their crops to survive until they could rebuild
and bring in replacement animals.

"The teams decided to do what they could to help with the harvest and
followup planting, then someone had the crazy idea of wearing their biosuits
while they worked.  While Tim and I were doing what we could, the teams
helping with the harvesting lived in their suits and *ran* as they helped the
villagers.  Then they turned themselves into living tractors and did the
plowing and seeding for the next set of crops."

Sascha had come over while I was talking.  "I've never heard about that."

I smiled, not seeing her, but seeing the night we found the destroyed town
and decided to help in any way we could, damn the survey goals.  "It was
never reported.  Somehow we lost calibration on the sat link and all our
monitors went dead at the same time.  Our excuse, when the relief teams found
us later, was that we'd been too busy to take time to fix things.  BP was
almost ready to write us off as lost by the time we were 'found'.

"Those of us who happen to be available at the time, go back on the
anniversary of the day we showed up."  I blushed.  "There's a monument
honoring the expedition.  A couple of BP wolves in their biosuits pulling a
plow that's being guided by their human partners, also in biosuits...  And
statues of Tim and me, working on an ox."

I looked down at my covered legs, then at her.  "I'd like to go, but it's up
to you, now.  I'd be late anyway.  I'll have to send my apologies.  Not the
first time."

Another memory made me laugh gently.   "BP had to build a dedicated training
center nearby.  The regional one couldn't handle the constant load of
volunteers.  Word has it, over eighty percent of the applicants are
accepted."

That tidbit of news caused her to jerk her head around so fast the servos
whined.  "Eighty percent?"

"From what I hear, yes."

"Incredible!  The worldwide average is under five percent."

She turned back to gaze out the window.  Eventually she shared some of her
memories.

"Both of our families have a tradition of service.  Illya helped fit me for
my first working biosuit.  It was my 'coming of age' gift.  He already had
one.  Our parents always teased us and kidded us about being the first BP
cyborg team because it seemed like we lived in our suits most of the time.

"We never doubted we'd partner when we were old enough to join BP.

"When we were old enough, we applied as a team, and were accepted.
Unfortunately, because of all the time we'd played by ourselves, they
declared us unsuitable for command track. We had the wrong mindset."

She sighed.   "Losing our dream hurt both of us, but after counseling, we
were able to accept what had happened.  It wasn't anyone's fault, really.
None of our parents had been highly placed in the command structure so nobody
realized Illya and I should have been spending more time in groups while we
played.

"If it hadn't been for that, we would have gone from basic training directly
into the command team training program.

"Anyway, Illya and I met all the requirements for a career we'd never
considered.  I was offered the chance to become a bodyguard and sniper."

Her voice was low and I could sense she was drifting in her memories again.
"Illya and I went back to our quarters and talked through the night.
Ultimately, it was our combined sense of duty that made the decision.  If we
could do it, we would.

"It was that simple after all we stripped the non-essentials away from the
arguments for and against."

She sighed deeply and gazed out the window in silence for a long time.

When she started speaking again she was facing the window and shivering.  "We
were fresh from training, and I'd accepted a bodyguard assignment in a 'low
risk' combat zone."

She faced me and I could see the pain in her eyes.  "A suicide squad of Wolf
Killers hit our position one night, just as we were rotating the sentry
teams.  Illya and I saved the people we were protecting, but we all had
serious injuries.  Illya and I nearly died.  Would have if we weren't so used
to working in our suits that our reflexes were spinal instead of reasoned.

"I did have to replace my first suit, though, and this one was built for me
while we recovered.

"The next assignment was the same as the first, bodyguard duty mostly, with a
couple of quiet 'assigned targets' missions.

"So it went for the next few years.  We found out that we loved the thrill of
the stalk and assassination as much as we enjoyed the sex when it was safe
again."

She was silent a long time, and I left her to her memories.

"It was supposed to be a 'pick up and extract' mission.  Simple.  Find a
young woman with important information, and escort her back to the combat
teams.  They'd take it from there...

"Except it didn't work out that way.  It was a trap, set up by the Wolf
Killers.  We had misread our directions and when the suicide bomb went off,
we were three blocks away."

"Illya and I did what little we could, but our best guess is that at least
fifteen people died because we didn't have the skills to save them.

"When it was over, we applied for training as scout medics.  We never really
discussed it, but we didn't have to."

She turned back to face me again.  "We gave up everything we believed in so
we could save lives instead of taking them.  Our families have never
understood that decision."

I raised a hand and then let it drop.  I wanted to touch her so I could
reassure her that I understood--but she was too far away.

She saw the gesture and nodded her awareness of what I had wanted to do.

Then we both looked out the window again.  We didn't need the words between
us, or the touches.

We knew who we were, accepted the knowledge, and for now, it was enough.
----

"Community togetherness can lead to a consensus outlook that seeks and destroys any dissident element, no matter how small and really harmless"

Dean R. Koontz - "A Darkness in My Soul" - published June, 1972

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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