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NNTP-Posting-Date: Wed, 19 Sep 2007 08:00:04 -0500
From: "Elf M. Sternberg" <elf@pendorwright.com>
Subject: {ASSM} Journal Entry 120 / 00413  Kathy On The Beach, Reprise and Epilogue (MF (SM))
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Date: Wed, 19 Sep 2007 13:10:02 -0400
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Kathy On The Beach, Reprise and Epilogue
Aldea, Narnya 22, 0413
OUTSIDE: There is a strong preference on this ship for the forward
lounge, and I suppose that's normal, being an exploration vessel. Most
people prefer to look ahead, to where they're going, to watch the stars
approach and fly by.

But me? At the moment, I'd rather sit in the aft lounge. It's emptier,
the bartender less busy, and the music a little more subdued. Besides,
we're two days out of Pendor, and Ian is taking it a little more slowly
than usual. He's cautious, but more than that he knows that in two days
all this that has been built on his ship will end. 1107 people crammed
into a microscopic society, much of us very dependent upon the decisions
Ian, Wendy, and the Engineering crew make. We depend on Wendy to make
sure nobody does anything stupid, like double-cycle an airlock, or
overcharge the carbon releases into the s-space fusion drives. We hope
Ian negotiates properly, and that the navigator won't aim us right
through the heart of a star or something. To quote, "That'd end your
trip real quick, wouldn't it?"

But more than that, we've come to rely on each other to maintain the
semblance of sanity we call "ship's role." With only 1107 people to
choose from, and nowhere to go to get away from everybody else, there's
a lot of need for understanding, compassion, and tolerance. Especially
since there are ten-plus different races on board, everything from Ian
to the delphin s-space pilots. 648 days may seem like a long time, but
it can seem longer if you're not just getting along. And if you're like
me, trying to manage or juggle your relationships takes effort,
practice, and a really quick tongue.

So I like the aft lounge. It lets me see where we've been, when our
forward-looking attitude becomes almost a parody of what we are. And in
two days, all these relationships come to an end. We'll be home. And
some won't reapply for another trip out, and new people will be on
board, and when we land we'll be surrounded by people we knew when we
left, people who, like us, have gone through over two years of change.
Ian knows all this, and gave us two more days to talk it out,
peacefully, under real calm Corrane-I drive that requires virtually no
engineering crew and literally no bridge crew. This is a time for us to
be together, before every relationship on board comes crashing down.

Like mine. And Kathy's. As I watch the stars recede, I waited for her.

I don't remember how long I was waiting before I heard her voice. It
wasn't that long. "Hi."

I looked up at her young and pretty face. Only eighteen years old now, I
wondered what she was going to do when we got home. Kathy's a spacer,
there's all there is to her, and I know when she gets home she's going
to walk right into Ian's office and say, "please?"

"Hi yourself, beautiful. Sit down?" I motioned to the chair opposite my
own. In the subdued lighting she looked magnificent, her long blond
tresses glinting merrily.

She smiled. "Sure." She sat and ordered herself a tall mug of Orc Tea.

"How can you drink that stuff?"

"What? Iced Mate'? It's good."

"It's boiled tree bark."

"Oh, yeah, and this is coming from a human who drinks kfi."

"Hey, I like kfi. But I suppose our eternal argument about what is and
is not good food isn't really why you asked me to meet you here after
your shift."

She smiled again. "No, it isn't."

"Then, what?"

She paused, staring off at the far wall for a few seconds, then she
sighed and said, "In less than two days, we're going to be in orbit
around Pin. We're already inside Pendor Controlled Space. We passed the
Oort cloud about an hour ago, it's on the PBBS."

"I suppose this is the discussion that's going all over the ship. What
are we gonna do when we get home, right?"

"Well...Yes. And no." I raised my eyebrows. "I know almost exactly what
we're going to do when we get home. You're going to go back to P'nyssa
and M'Ress and Paul and your home and settle down for another century or
so, until you get bored again. And we both know that I'm going back out
into space as soon as possible, although I'd love to go with Ian if I
can. He likes me, and I like him, and all personal feeling aside, he's a
great captain. Wait, please, I can see you're dying to interrupt me. I
love you, Ken. You know that, and I know that, and I love you, too. The
times we've had aboard the Eldarfaroth are unforgettable, and in my
case, pretty indelible."

I smiled. The rings I'd pierced through her labia were constant
reminders, to both of us, just how far we'd explored her need to give,
and my strength to control. I wore the keys to her heart, almost
literally, around my neck.

She continued. "So don't tell me what you feel, and that it'll be all
right, and give me all of the Shardik bullshit you're so good at, and
you know it." I kept smiling, and nodded.

But she didn't say anything further, so I said "So?"

"So." She smiled. She rested her elbows on the table and leaned over to
me, and in a soft voice she said, "I want one more thing from you..."
and she whispered the last word, "master."

I raised my eyebrow again, and said, equally softly, "And what would
that be, my slave?"

"I want a brand."

I paused. I wasn't sure I'd heard that right, so I played her words over
again in my mind. I'd heard it right.

"You want a... brand?"

She nodded. "Mm Hmm."

"Like in a burn mark?" My voice was a little closer to stage whisper
now.

"Yeah." And when she said that, her eyes lit up, like they had when
she'd asked for the piercing.

I thought about it for all of three seconds. I could see in those eyes
that there was no way I was going to talk her out of this one, like I
hadn't been able to talk her out of the last one, the piercings. Okay,
then. I said, "What kind?"

"Eldar, four stars." She smiled back.

"My personal symbol." My brows knitted. I thought about it. It made
sense, but I didn't like it. Every lover she'd ever have would know that
at one point somebody had burned Shardik's personal symbol onto her,
probably Shardik myself. In any event, they'd be sure to ask about it.
Not many people walk around with brands, to be sure. I've never heard of
one. More painful than tattoos, I imagine. I wouldn't know, I've never
had either.

"Yeah." Was all she said, and her eyes again lit up.

All I could do was nod. My slave had more control over our relationship
than I did.

            *            *            *

INSIDE: It was a different beach, on a different planet, in a different
part of the universe. The sand was crystal white this time, and the
ocean really was blue, and the trees were your standard palms. This is
Pandora, a green world of my desire, made because Pendor lacks some
things, things which we can live without, but I'd rather not. Pandora
adds to the system that is Pendor, allows for a special kind of
variation that is absolutely necessary. Without Pandora's gravity,
Pendor would never have tides and her beaches would be stagnant and
unwashed. Pandora also has something unique... sunrises and sunsets.
Pandora is deliberately geologically unstable, kicking overlarge amounts
of volcanic dust into the atmosphere, so depending on where you stand,
the sunsets are spectacular blue-greens or red-yellows.

And tonight's sunset was magnificent. A spectacular blue sinking into
the horizon, the momentary green flash as it refracted in the atmosphere
and finally disappeared out of sight. I paused to watch it, and then sat
and waited. This time there was no shimmer of transport. We were within
Pin's rays, and everything was accessible by stepping disk. Kathy merely
appeared to my left, on the beach. Naked, she fell to her knees.

I rose from the sand and approached my thrall. She kept her head down,
her hands in her lap, waiting for the pain she had requested I inflict.
I walked around her, admiring her beauty, not for the first time, and as
I walked behind her, I slid my fingers under her hair and grabbed a
handful. She gasped, a delicious shudder running through her. "Slave,
crawl."

She lifted a knee and slid forward. On her knees, I directed her over to
the unlit bonfire that I had erected on the sand. "Stop." She did, and I
said "See that? Tonight, in there, is your request. A mark, a sear to
remember me by as you travel back out to the stars. Is that what you
want?"

I barely heard her over the surf. "Yes."

"Then watch." I gestured, and a small charge in the center of the
bonfire lit, flicking about, light the rest of the fire. We sat,
waiting, as the flame grew. I spread a blanket on the ground near the
flame, and directed her to it. A large foam wedge supported her head and
back, and I spread her legs. With a small watercolor pen, I marked a
small dot on her thigh, about two inched below her cunt, right where I
was going to put the tiny brand I'd had fashioned. A Ssphynx I trust,
who makes his own leaded typesets, made the design for me, and another
smith, this one a Uncia, made the brand for me from Maccus' design. I
had built the fire in a tepee design, so that inside lay the small alloy
form, less than an inch high, of the Eldar, my symbol, heating until it
was glowing white.

As the fire blazed, I slowly stripped off my clothing. I don't need all
that absurd costumery most purveyors of D&S seem to feel I do; she was
my slave, she had been for almost two years now, and that was that. I
glanced over at her, leaning against the pillow, her legs carefully and
deliberately splayed open. I had long ago removed her pubic hair as an
impediment, and her excitement was hotly evident in her swollen inner
lips and the firelight glistening of her juices.

I reached back behind my neck and undid the clasp of the chain. The tiny
key on it slid down into my hand. I crouched down between those lovely
legs and with one hand lifted the lock closing her labia while with the
other I slid the key into place. She sighed silently as I slid the lock
out of its place of honor. I stroked her between her lips with one
finger, parting those inner lips, passing over her vagina, but I didn't
penetrate her, not yet. That was for later.

I reached back into the bag with which I'd brought all of tonight's
paraphernalia, and brought out the black sash. She looked up at me, and
I allowed it, as I slowly tied it around her eyes and secured at the
back of her head, threading it partially through her hair. The last I
saw of her eyes before I put the cloth on, they were bright and wet and
afraid, but they also trusted me. She began to sob quietly, a small tear
slowly leaving a trail down her cheek as it dropped from behind the
blindfold. I leaned over and lightly kissed her cheek, and she turned
her head to meet my lips, but I was already on my way down her neck, and
her back arched towards me, encouraging me to lick her nipple, but just
before I reached one I pulled away. She sobbed anew in frustration. I
smiled.

I rarely blindfolded Kathy. There was something in my nature that said
she should always be allowed to see what was going to happen to her, but
tonight that sort of personal taboo made violation all the more
delicious. I was pulling out all the stops tonight. It was our last,
most intense night in a long list of intense nights and I wanted her to
feel the fear, love, pain and pleasure we always shared, more than ever.

I reached into the bag again and took out the extension tongs and the
small wooden block I had brought to hold the brand. Deep inside the
fire, it was glowing and ready.

"Slave?"

"Yes Master?" she replied, the fear in her voice thick. She'd asked for
this, but even she knew that she didn't really know what she'd asked
for.

"Are you ready?"

"I...I think so."

"Not gonna back out on me, are you?"

"No, master. I will not."

"Good." I took the tongs and reached into the fire. I turned the hot
metal over so that the insert was face up, picked it up in the tongs and
brought it towards me. I held the block of wood in my left hand and
pressed the insert tab into the hold in the block and turned, securing
it onto place. I turned and shifted the searing cast to my right hand,
and I leaned over and aimed at the mark I'd made earlier with the pen.

And I pressed.

She screamed, a pure, pealing thing of pain and terror, even as I
watched with fascination at her flesh vaporizing away in wisps. I
removed the brand, tossed it carelessly into the ocean. I'd never need
it ever again, didn't want it ever again.

With a bottle of alcohol, I cooled and cleaned the small mark. As the
alcohol evaporated, I examined my work. It was small, clean, and
clear...a perfect Eldar, four small dots around that may as well have
been stars. My sign. Burned into her flesh. I cursed a little wryly at
my erection, betraying the fact that somewhere deep inside, I had
enjoyed the pain I'd inflicted.

I reached up, and tears were streaming down her cheeks when I reached
for the blindfold. I slowly untied it and took it off. I reached out for
her and she rushed into my arms, crying. She sobbed for a long time, and
I slowly leaned her back against the cushion. On top of her, I parted
her legs and slid my erection into her.

She sighed, her eyes closing in pleasure, her arms wrapped around my
neck. I held there, my cock nestled up gently against her cervix. She
opened her eyes and looked into mine. "So good," was all she whispered.

"I'm glad." I replied, slowly stroking myself into and out of her, her
satinlike sex holding onto me. She wrapped her legs around me as I began
to fuck her, watching her face glow red with pleasure, the heat of our
bodies starting to outwarm the fire.

I supported my weight on my hands and pushed up to look at her, lowering
my head to lick and tease her nipples, and small groans of pleasure
escaped her.

"I love you, Kathy," I said, my tempo increasing, my need to come
growing.

"I love you too," her voice rising in pitch, in need. Her hips began
thrusting against mine, and the sensations running along my cock were
growing, becoming stronger, and I could feel the tightening in my chest.
Faster.

Faster, harder, fucking my slave, my thrall, my beloved. She became my
universe, my attention focused on her, her open mouth, breathing hard as
we pushed against each other. I could feel it more, now than ever.

I began to pound. I felt I was going to hurt her, and as I passed the
point of no return I stopped and stared into her eyes, my cock
positioned to thrust one last time. I felt like I as on the edge of a
great cliff.

I pushed. I fell. I screamed, releasing into her, coming. She sighed as
I collapsed on top of her, my last desperate thrusts pushing my orgasm
on and on. I felt I was dissolving. I was losing consciousness. I was
going.

Deep in the back of my mind, the circuits kicked in, saying "I will not
pass out" over and over, and I shook my head to clear it. I smiled, and
looked down at her. She smiled back, and we laughed and wrapped our arms
around each other, holding and laughing until tears streamed from our
eyes. I slowly raised myself back until I was kneeling on my knees and
looked down at her, lying against the cushion. She pushed herself up
into a sitting position and looked down at her right thigh. She trailed
a finger slowly over the blackened burn. "What do you think?" I asked.

She hummed a little, a sigh maybe, and said, "Oh Gods, Ken, I think it's
incredible. I don't think I can ever come close to telling you how
wonderful it is."

"I'm glad you like it."

"Like? I love it! And I love you. Thank you."

"No, Kath, thank you. You've been wonderful to me."

"And you to me."

            *            *            *

EPILOGUE 171 / 0413 I stood out on the balcony of my domicile. I'd been
home for almost two months now, but Kathy and I hadn't seen each other
because she'd been busy taking her academy exams. She'd shown up last
night in her active duty uniform, with Ian's personal signet on her
chest, to tell me that Ian had accepted her as an engineering research
trainee, and that she was shipping out tomorrow. That is to say, today.
In fact, according to my watch, the Eldarfaroth transits to hyperdrive
in four minutes.

P'Nyssa came up behind me and I heard her put two glasses of something
down on the table. She wrapped her tens around me and leaned up against
me. I leaned back, still looking up the night sky. I know, it's
illogical to look up since there was no real way to know what direction
the ship was going, and the ring points in but Ian's headed out, but
still I looked up at the stars showing beyond the rim of the ring. Stars
I might have been to. Stars Kathy might be headed to.

Nyss rested her head on my shoulder and sighed quietly. I echoed her
sigh, and said quietly, "It is impossible to love your wife without
loving all women somewhat."

"Uncle Lazarus?"

"Uncle Robert. Yeah."

"You're going to miss her, aren't you?"

"A little. No, that's not true. I'm gonna miss her a lot. Our affair may
have been a bit... strange, but I did love her, and I know she loved me,
too. I don't think anybody could have done for her what I did, and vice
versa."

"I don't think so either."

"I know we haven't talked much about it, but does it bother you what we
did?"

"No, I don't think so." She smiled a little. "I know you well enough to
know how you express yourself. You're too smart for that kind of
bullshit."

"You know what, Nyss? It's been a few hundred years since you moved in,
and I've never been happier to see you than today."

She smiled again, pulled back, and handed me my glass.

"I know," was all she said.

----------------------
The Journal Entries of Kennet R'yal Shardik 
and Related Tales.

The entire archive of stories can be found at:
http://www.pendorwright.com/journals

Copyright 1991 Elf Mathieu Sternberg.
Distributed under the Creative Commons License BY-ND-NC/1.0
Some Rights Reserved. 

--

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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