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From: rache <rache696@yahoo.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} Amoure-Propre by Rachael Ross (M/F, Romance, Caution)
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Date: Sun, 03 Jun 2007 06:10:01 -0400
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Amour-Propre

Copyright 2007 Rachael Ross all rights reserved. Intended for adults
only.
Story Codes: M/F, Romance, Caution

Note: I'll tell you right now that there is nothing extreme in this,
nothing graphic to get squicked about. But, a young woman does go to
unusual lengths to feel better about herself. This is fundamentally a
feel good romance and it isn't a very serious story. I just wanted to
fall in love today. -rr


Amour-Propre
by rache


Have you ever wanted to change something about yourself? Like your
nose maybe, or the color of your hair. Be a little taller, of have
bigger breasts. I did. I saved for it, the way other girls saved for
college, or a car, or even a pony. I saved for self-improvement and
I'd look through magazines like Vogue, rich with tall wisps of
supermodel beauty, and I'd try to imagine myself like that. All pale
and blonde with puffy lips and big tits, with big hard nipples...But it
never worked.

It isn't healthy looking at magazines like that, not when you're 5'3"
tall and all of a hundred pounds, wrapped up in brown skin and thick
black hair. I'm Amerasian, and my Asian half is Filipina, so most
people in pasty Seattle thought I was a Mexican. I was attractive; I
knew that, I just didn't believe it. And so I was determined to do
something about it, even if it meant going to Sweden, of all places.

I couldn't wait to tell my boyfriend. I'd told him I was getting a
boob job for my 18th birthday, a gift from my father, which it was.
But neither of them completely understood my intentions. My father was
a little surprised when he picked me up at the airport. I was wearing
a tight pink tank-top that clearly showed my complete lack of breasts,
or even nipples. I'd enjoyed the looks from men, women, even children
as I traveled back home, but my father's look was priceless. He just
stared in disbelief.

I ran up to him, smiling and giggling happily, wrapping my arms around
him and hugging him, even though there was still some soreness.

"What do you think, Daddy?" I posed for him and grinned.

"I, well, uh...I thought you, uh...What happened?" He finally said.

"I got my boobs done!" I practically squealed. "Aren't they great?"

We didn't really talk after that. When I got home I called my
boyfriend and he said he'd be over in an hour so we could go out and
celebrate. From the tone of his voice I knew he meant we'd stay in and
celebrate. I'd been walking around the house topless, wearing just my
skirt, and my father was clearly disturbed by this, but I didn't stop.
I wanted him to get used to the fact that I had no breasts. None.

My boyfriend's eyes practically popped out of his head when he saw me.
I answered the door wearing a very slinky dress I'd found at Heathrow
waiting for my flight home. It was royal blue and I'd paid too much,
but it was beautiful and it had a bust line that plunged to my navel.
It revealed exactly the flatness of my chest.

The saleswoman, an older lady, prim and proper and oh so British, had
tried to talk me out of it. She was very sad, asking me if it had been
cancer. I told her yes. It was just a little white lie to make her
feel better. I made it seem as though I was buying that dress to help
me deal with it, like it was therapy. Her eyes were sympathetic and
the lady hugged me, giving me 25% off the E730.00 price tag.

"What the...fuck?" My boyfriend was pale and eyes were wide open.

"How do you like it, Mark?" I smiled and put my hands on my hips.

"Why?" He asked.

"I told you, I didn't like my tits." I shrugged.

"But I thought, I...why didn't you get bigger ones?" He looked ready to
cry.

"Why would I do that?" I was starting to get angry, actually,
realizing that my boyfriend liked my tits more than he liked me.

We both looked down at my chest.

"I thought you'd be happy for me." I looked at him. "For us."

"Well, baby...I'm not." He turned around and left.

My father was there, just around the corner and I ran to him, hugging
him as I started to cry. He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my
head.

"Hmmm, that went better than I expected." He said.

I couldn't help but giggle then, just a little. But I was still
hurting, still crying. I changed clothes and we went to McDonald's. I
needed some French fries. They have the best and they always cheered
me up, even though they gave me pimples if I ate too many.

My boyfriend screened his calls and wouldn't pick up. A week later it
wasn't even his phone number anymore. He'd changed it and the one time
I'd thought about going to his house to confront him, I chickened out.
I had the taxi drive past and then take me back home. I was a little
broken hearted, but I got over it, I think, sort of. Perhaps it was
for the best, really. But it did send me into a bit of a dive.

By the time I'd started college though I was better. I still felt good
about myself, especially since my father had at least outwardly seemed
to come around. At first I knew he wished I would wear a maiden form
bra when we went someplace together, just to give the appearance. But
I wouldn't. My only compromise was that I'd occasionally where
something loose and baggy, like a big sweatshirt. But eventually even
that attempt at normalcy was forgotten.

I was proud of my body and I especially liked wearing tight t-shirts
and low cut dresses. As I'd always detested women who pushed their
large breasts in everyone's face for attention, now I was guilty of
the same thing, in a manner of speaking. In my case though it was the
lack that drew second glances and curious stares. I was not an object
of lust, obviously, more a curiosity, but it was interesting how often
and quickly that could change.

My first real experience happened at a shopping mall of all places.
Lynnwood Mall, just South of Everett. I was drinking an orange juice,
wearing a short white skirt that showed off my legs and ass, and a too
small halter top that exposed my stomach and gave proof to the fact
that my chest was flat as a 12 year old boy's. I looked nice though,
although my hair was back in a ponytail and I wore no makeup at all. I
wasn't looking to get picked up, and that is probably why it happened.

"Hi." This guy was suddenly next to me and I was a bit surprised I
hadn't noticed him. He was tall, with short brown hair and nice hazel
eyes. Not bad looking, mid-twenties probably.

"Hello." I replied.

"I hope I'm not bothering you, but..." He smiled a little awkwardly. "I
just want to know your name. I mean, I'll be wondering for the rest of
my life and..." He faltered and shrugged.

"And I couldn't have that on my conscience?" I smiled and teased him a
little. As far as pickup lines go it wasn't bad, really. But it might
have been my mood too.

"Right, yeah." He grinned self-consciously. "I sound like an idiot,
huh?"

"Oh, I don't know." I twirled my straw.

"Can I sit down?" He looked at the chairs around the small table.

"I was just getting ready to leave." I looked at him as he lifted his
eyes to mine.

"Really? I wish you wouldn't." He sat down. "I was thinking about
going to a movie, but I hate going alone, you know?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"Do you like movies?" He smelled good, I noticed. Most guys don't
really smell like anything, or else they smell bad. This guy smelled
clean, like after shave cologne kind of. The way my father did after
his morning shower. It wasn't anything exotic, or erotic, just a
pleasant thing that I found comforting.

"Sometimes, yeah, I do."

"Would you like to see one with me?" He was smiling a lot. I liked
that too.

"Now?" I shook my head. "Nah, I should probably get going."

"Where?"  He turned his head, looking at the mall around us. "What
could be better than this?"

I laughed at his smile and made a gesture of futility. "I don't know."
I admitted. "Maybe home."

"Yeah, well, hard to beat home. Yeah." But he didn't sound so sure.
"Can I take you home?"

"I don't know, I..." I smiled a little shyly for some reason, maybe
because it felt really good to have someone interested in me for a
change.

"Please? I have a bus!" He grinned.

"A bus?" I laughed. "Okay, yeah...me too."

We walked together through the mall, towards the exit where the busses
stopped. There was a drug store at that end and we stood near it,
looking outside through the big windows. There weren't any buses yet.

"Which one is yours?" I asked.

"Uh...you don't know?" He looked at me and we laughed.

"Nooo...you're taking me home...remember?" I gave him a sideways look.

"Oh." He thought about that for a second. "Oh! Um...the downtown one
and then, ah, we have to get on my other bus. The west Seattle one."

"Ohhh...You have two buses. Okay." I nodded.

"Yeah." He was nodding too. Both of us just smiling.

"Can I ask you something, sort of weird?" I looked at the man. Not
totally sure I wanted to be doing any of this, but I did, you know?

"Personal?" He looked back.

"Yeah. I guess so." I shrugged and he nodded. "Do you have any condoms
at home?"

"What?" His eyes. Those hazel eyes. That was why I was doing it.

I pointedly looked at the drug store next to us and he followed my
gaze. He didn't say anything, he just walked in and I followed him,
rather enjoying this. It was something new to do.

He found the aisle with condoms in it and he scratched his head a
little, glancing at me, and finally picked two small packages up,
lifting them in his hands as if he were weighing them. He tried it
with a couple other brands, apparently having no preference and
fearing I did. Also a little afraid to ask, I suppose. I just watched.

"These people look happy." He finally said, holding up a little box of
a dozen ribbed and lubricated and ultra-thin condoms of one sort or
another. The box had a couple, naked the both of them, kissing.

"Yeah." I shrugged and laughed.

He took his little box to the register and there were a few people
there, a couple women, one young, like me, except she had boobs and
too much makeup, and an older one. She looked like she was bored and
in a bit of a rush, tapping her credit card on the counter. Behind it,
ignoring all of us was another woman, a girl really, who looked like
she'd just dropped out of high school because she heard you could
steal a lot of cool stuff if you had a job in a drug store.

"Hi Lonnie." I smiled at her.

"Hey!" She looked at me, past and between the two women. "Shit! What
are you doin' here?" Lonnie grinned at me and I knew she was stoned.
I'd gone out with her brother a few times when we were in high school
together, they were twins.

"Just buying some rubbers." I bobbed my head. "Waiting for the bus.
You know."

I was peering around the women and I wondered what Lonnie would think
of my new tits, but she didn't even notice. That was disappointing.

"Yeah, cool!" Lonnie reached out between the two women and took the
box and a ten dollar bill from my friend. "Gonna do it on the bus,
huh?" She laughed like that was funny as hell. "I done that! Nine
eighty five."

"Hey!" The impatient woman stared at her.

Lonnie ignored her. "That gonna do it for you?" She smiled and dropped
the condoms in a plastic bag and threw in a handful of other stuff, a
key chain, some cheap sunglasses, and an air freshener.

"Love this job." Lonnie gave him the bag and his change and ignored
the woman's dirty looks. "You want drugs let me know!" She giggled at
me. "It's a freakin' drug store!"

"Weird." The guy laughed as we walked out. He opened the bag and put
the sunglasses on. They were tortoise shell reading glasses for old
women and I laughed at him.

We got on the bus, sitting together and it's a long ride from Lynnwood
out to West Seattle. We changed busses downtown and it was starting to
rain.  But we didn't do it on the bus, there was no way. I wasn't like
Lonnie and I breathed a sigh of relief. We didn't even talk very much,
which was strange for me because I'm a talker.

My dad told me once, out of pure frustration, "You know sweetie, you
don't have to fill in every blank space." Meaning he wanted to hear a
little silence for a change. I'd largely ignored that advice and my
dad lived with it.

"Can I ask you something weird now?" He was holding my hand, which was
nice, and we were climbing a hill in West Seattle, walking in the
street because the sidewalk was too narrow to walk side by side.

"Personal?" I asked him with a little smile.

"Yeah."

"Sure, I guess so." I nodded.

"You uh, you are a girl, right?" He was blushing a little. "I mean if
you're not, um..."

"You'd still take me home?" I laughed.

"Well, yeah." He laughed too.

"What if I'm a boy?" I asked, just to tease him.

"I'll turn gay." He gave a tiny shrug. "But only for you."

"You don't have to." I squeezed his hand. "I'm a girl."

"Good." He really did laugh then.

"Nice to know it doesn't matter though." I said huffing a little cause
it was a long steep hill.

"Oh, I didn't say it didn't matter!" He grinned at me. "I'm just
really glad I don't have to buy the Village People's greatest hits,
you know? I don't really like those guys."

"Me neither!" I giggled.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

His house was large and not very empty. He had a lot of stuff, not
anything specific, just...stuff. He gave me the tour, after we'd
caught our breath and had some cold water to drink. We were both
flushed and a little breathless from the climb and I told him he
should move a little lower, but then I saw the view and changed my
mind.

"Pretty nice, huh?" He was smiling and we were standing in his
bedroom, facing the southwest through a huge picture window. Or a
dozen of them really, smaller windows caught in an ornate lattice of
ancient wood to create the whole.

"Gorgeous." I nodded. It was a clear day, falling into late afternoon,
and the Olympic Mountains looked close enough to touch.

"You should see them at sunrise." He nodded, and then smiled shyly. "I
mean, I didn't mean like..."

"I know." I giggled, turning towards him. "Maybe I will."

"You stand there like that and you look...I don't know." He was
looking at me, the mood changing and he was shaking his head.

"Like a 12 year old boy?" I put my hands on my hips, striking a little
pose.

"No." He licked his lips. "Like an angel, I think."

"An angel?" I rolled my eyes a little, but he was serious and I liked
it a lot. "Do you want to see me?"

I felt a little shy, and my heart was going now, I could feel it
inside, beneath my smooth flat chest. I was in his bedroom, and he had
a nice one, with a big bed, an antique maybe, with four big posts. The
walls were papered in red and salmon, one of those Victorian designs,
with surrealistic flowers folding around and into themselves, very
much like a woman's sex. I was damp just standing there and it had
been so long since anyone had looked at me the way he was.

"Yes." He didn't even smile, his pretty eyes just got big and he stood
there, watching me framed in that big window.

I undid my ponytail and brushed my hair with my fingers, pulling it
back so I could see him while I removed my shoes slowly, bending over
in that short white skirt, legs straight for him, and I undid the thin
leather straps, smiling behind the veil of my long black hair. And I
stood up, wiggling my little brown toes for a moment upon the rough
knotted Persian carpet that filled the large room.

I unbuttoned my skirt slow and deliberately, partly for him, but also
for me. This was all new, the new me with a new man, and I was
frightened, just a little, knowing he liked me and afraid he wouldn't.
I let my skirt fall down my legs and bared my small pink panties. I
smoothed them with my fingers, swallowing nervously and pushing my
pelvis out, so he could see the swell of my sex prominent and beneath
that, between my slightly spread thighs, nothing at all, just my
panties pulled snug to my shaved sex.

My fingers traveled lower, without any real thought of my own, to feel
the small knot of my clit beneath the soft cotton, and then to my
slit, pressing my middle finger across it, between it as my folds were
plump already, and the fabric clung to my damp lips. When I moved my
hand away I knew he could see the shape of my pussy, the faint outline
of my cunt and perhaps the small dark stain growing there as my sex
quivered inside.

I left my top on, the thin baby blue halter stretched tight around my
chest, and my panties as well, walking towards him slowly. He didn't
move, but only watched me, his lips smiling and his shoulders rising
and falling with every breath. I knelt for him, pressing my hands to
his flat stomach and then his thighs, seeing the lump in his pants. He
was hard for me, excited and ready, but oh so patient and he'd wait
for me. I could do anything and he'd content himself to watch, but I
wanted him.

His penis was long and hard and I freed him awkwardly, opening his
pants, and helping him step out of them, and then his boxers. His cock
moved, bobbing up and down, swinging left and right, and it brushed my
cheeks and hair. I chased it with my mouth, giggling softly and
keeping my hands on his thighs. I caught it between my lips, steadying
his penis and kissing it then, tickling along the shaft and around the
swollen head with my tongue.

Precum was leaking from the tip of him and I caught some of it upon
the tip of my tongue, swallowing it for him while he held my hair,
pulling it from my face so he could see me. I took him in my mouth
finally, his smooth cockhead sliding between my stretched lips, over
my tongue and filling my hot wet mouth. I sighed around it, enjoying
the feeling of having a man inside me like that, in my mouth which
always seemed much more personal, more intimate to me than merely
fucking. I made love with my mouth.

"Oh, that's good..." He whispered, stroking my head, not pushing or
puling, or even moving his hips.

I looked up at him with my eyes, moving my mouth back and forth,
digging my fingers into his thighs, feeling the muscles hard and tense
beneath his warm soft skin. I didn't try to take all of him, it wasn't
necessary and he was thick anyway. I just worked my mouth over him,
taking half of his cock and pulling back to hold just the head,
swiping my tongue over it quickly before doing it again. I was nursing
on him, drinking spit and precum, breathing easily through my nose,
and we were like that a long while.

He was moving, just a little then, and if I'd wanted to use my hand as
well as my mouth I could have brought him off quickly. Taking his warm
seed deep into my tummy. But I wanted him inside me first, to feel his
cock between my legs, in my sex, and reluctantly I pulled away from
him. I gave his cock a soft kiss, just on the tip, and smiled and
licked my lips, still kneeling and staring up at the man.

"I want you inside me." I told him and he reached behind him, for the
condoms in their box sitting on the bed.

He handed one to me and I giggled and he smiled, both of us feeling a
little self-conscious suddenly and I rolled my eyes, feeling the mood
only slightly spoiled by this necessity. But when I pinched the tip
and rolled the clear latex over the head, it was alright. This would
still be good and I used my mouth, my tight pinched lips to take his
cock into my mouth again, following that thin sheath slowly down the
shaft.

I pulled off him and went lower, wanting to taste his skin one more
time, so I kissed his exposed cock, near the base and trailed my
tongue through his soft pubic hair to his balls, kissing them as well.
I worked them with my tongue and pulled one of his balls gently into
my mouth, sucking it and washing it with my tongue. And then the
other, caressing his testes through that soft sack of skin, getting
them wet and warm and his cock was throbbing and heavy across my
cheek.

After a few minutes he reached with his hands to take mine, pulling me
up so he could kiss me.

"You're so beautiful." He kissed my lips, running his tongue across
them and I opened for him, moaning into his mouth.

I felt his tongue filling me, exploring the place where his cock had
so recently been, playing across my teeth and tickling the roof of my
mouth, and he was turning me, so that I twisted my head to keep us
together. I sucked his tongue slowly, pressing my lips as far along
that wet pink muscle as possible, and sucking it hard while my tongue
fluttered beneath it. An his hands were on my hips and then my tummy
and then one went low, to press against my sex and I pushed myself
against him with a low groan.

His other hand went to my top, feeling my flat chest, exploring my non-
existent breasts. Underneath he went, working his hand beneath the
tight material, against my hot skin and I was grinding my panty
covered sex against his hand while we kissed. I could feel his cock
hard and hot and just a little wet, trapped between his lower belly
and the small of my back. His fingers played with my slit, rubbing my
clit through the cotton and my knees were weak, but he held me up with
his hands.

I felt my stomach fluttering, tight and then loose, my body shivering
from the inside out as the man's gentle hands held my body, his palm
against the place where my left breast would have been. He gripped me
hard like that, his fingers just beneath my arm, pulling my flushed
skin taut. I was going to cum, just like that, just kissing and being
touched and his fingers were between my swollen labia, pushing against
my panties, working that wet barrier a fraction inside me. It was a
tease for us, a delightful frightful tease as he tried to penetrate me
fully and couldn't.

And I wanted him so much right then. He'd removed his shirt before,
while I'd sucked his cock, and now he was taking off my halter. We
broke our kiss and his head was next to mine, his chin on my shoulder
as we looked down at my body. He untied the strings blindly, slowly,
and finally my top fell loose and then away, landing at my feet. We
could see the pale flesh it had covered, smooth and flat, without even
nipples to mar the beauty of my new body. He breathed heavily and his
hands caressed me, his fingers exploring me there, feeling nothing at
all but the lack of my womanhood.

"You're incredible." He whispered and my heart was pounding, my whole
being thrilled at his words.

"Do you like me?" I asked him, needing to hear it, desperate for his
acceptance.

"Oh yes, I love your body..." He pinched his extended fingers together
hard, gathering small bits of my skin between them, and it was a warm
aching sensation that made me shudder.

"...I love everything about you." He was kissing me, my neck and cheek
and I wanted to turn my head towards him, but the sight of his hands
playing on my empty chest was too good.

I moved slowly, pushing my panties down while he held me still,
bending with me and I just got my panties down far enough that I could
spread my legs for him, with my damp underwear pulled tight just above
my knees. I bent over further and he was moving, knowing what I needed
and I groaned as he moved his right hand away from my chest, cradling
me with his left arm, so that he could bring his cock to my sex from
behind.

My pussy was wet and eager for it then and I moved my ass slightly,
rolling my hips as I felt his blunt round cockhead rubbing across my
sex, searching for the small entrance to my womb. He found it and
pushed the tip inside me, splitting my labia around it and making me
gasp. I was nodding and licking my lips and looking at him over my
shoulder, begging for it with my wide brown eyes.

He pushed his cock inside me slowly, feeling my tight cunt resisting
at first and only reluctantly yielding to the delightful pressure of
his swollen cock. I pushed back a little as well, feeling a small
discomfort, but beyond that a delicious warmth. He was opening me
slowly and it was hard, so hard for him not to thrust his cock inside
me all at once, I knew. Just as I had to restrain my own sharp desire
to push myself against him, to impale myself on his beautiful cock.

"God, you're tight...hot and tight..." He was holding my chest now,
his hands beneath my body, holding my weight easily as I let myself
go. I just stood on my legs, bent over with my hands on his. We
massaged my chest together, our fingers entwined, marveling at the
sensation of expecting breasts and hard urgent nipples, but finding
nothing there at all.

He was fucking me now and I was in a dark cloud of passion. My long
hair fell around me and I was breathing hard, rocking my body against
his cock as he'd worked himself completely inside me. My vaginal
muscles had protested and then surrendered, and now they hugged him
tightly, embracing him tenderly. I was hot inside and wet for him, the
juices spilling out me, running down my thighs while we fucked and he
wasn't going to be very long now.

I was cumming hard, my breath coming in sharp gasps every time his
cockhead brushed the bottom of my cunt, my cervix, and my body was
vibrating with excitement. My ears filled with the soft slapping sound
of his body against mine and I moved against him harder, writhing in
his strong grasp. My pussy clasped itself to him, fighting to keep his
cock deep inside me while I had my orgasm, squeezing him and aching to
feel his release. He groaned and dropped his stomach to my back,
kissing my neck as we hunched over, very nearly collapsing to the
floor.

He was coming as well and I could feel his swollen cock jerking inside
me, pressing against the walls of my cunt as his sperm rushed up from
his balls. He was kissing me through my hair as I turned my face to
find his. Long black strands were caught between our lips and our
tongues played through them. I had my eyes closed and my knees felt
weak and my lungs burned while we made love in those few brief moments
of perfection when we climaxed together.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

I thought of staying, and he wanted me to. But how much better to have
our sex, to have our magic, and keep it forever? I dressed without
bathing; I wanted to keep that scent upon my skin, the wetness of my
orgasms still inside me and glistening on my thighs.

"What's your name?" He was lying down with his head propped on his
elbow, watching me dress. We'd made love again, on the bed, and it was
disheveled and warm and I missed it already.

"Shhh..." I smiled at him. "We'll be wondering the rest of our lives."

I left him there, naked and alone and feeling both happy and unhappy
all at once. He watched me leave, hoping his silence would make me
stay. And it was raining now, the way it does in Seattle. A rain like
nowhere else in the world, penetrating and cleansing and so cold you
can feel it in your soul.

It washed me clean while I waited for the bus and I wondered if he
would catch me in time.


end
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
rache696@yahoo.com
www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/rache/www/index.htm

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