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Message-ID: <52289asstr$1130245801@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: "Carol C" <cobillard@hotmail.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} More puberty, more theology, more communion, more semen
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Date: Tue, 25 Oct 2005 09:10:01 -0400
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Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
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Reading is like a sex act with the erotic body of language; it is 
unpredictable, fleeting, and culminates, like orgasm, in its disappearance.
-- Roland Barthes, Le Plaisir du texte (1973)

There is no trophy so lovely as a penis, erect and moist, fresh from your 
lovemaking, eager to be kissed by you.
-- Mom's Friend, A lecture to her girls, June 19, 1996


Readers of my prior autobiographical essays in this series ( 
http://www.angelfire.com/co4/cobil ) -- based on my childhood diaries -- 
will know that I grew up in the shadow of the Children of God, a church my 
Mom had joined and done flirty fishing for, out of which she became pregnant 
with me. And that she'd left the Church after I was born partly in response 
to Moses David's increasing penchant for child sex abuse. She remained 
firmly convinced that (1) sexual arousal and intercourse were manifestations 
of God's immediate intervention, and orgasm proof of communion with God and 
of His pleasure; (2) semen represents the Host of Holy Communion; (3) at the 
first signs of puberty, boys and girls should be introduced to sex; (4) oral 
sex is an essential part of foreplay; (5) adolescents need to experiment 
with multiple partners within a closed, healthy community; (6) there is no 
place in life for modesty, inhibition or chastity.

It follows from the notion of sex as a form of prayer that family members 
can and should enjoy nudity and should have sex in each other's presence, 
the observer taking vicarious pleasure in the orgasm and semen of a loved 
one. Mom, together with her landlord from the time I was 13, in 1993, had 
developed a theology that departed from Moses David's in that (a) sex was to 
be consensual and orgasm always mutual; (b) the female was to be dominant 
and would orchestrate the movement of penis at mouth and vagina; (c) that 
sex for minors must be strictly consensual and same-age. As with the CoG and 
seemingly religions everywhere, puberty is the defining moment for a child: 
the difference with us is that we are free to act according to our sexual 
impulses and urges because we believe them to be divinely inspired.

All of us learned to banish inhibition, false modesty and any sense of the 
shame invented and imposed by traditional religions. Moreover, from the 
earliest age every one of us came to think of virginity and the hymen as an 
obstacles to free use of our bodies and to the Holy Communion we saw 
evidenced in the faces of older kids having orgasms. We would look for signs 
of puberty on our bodies and those of our friends because we saw that a 
growing penis and growing breasts were the keys to adult fun. I dearly 
wanted boys to have erections over me. I had fear, at the age of 10, of a 
penis, and yet I wanted to be able to play with one and see semen come out 
of it. I wanted my vagina to a source of pleasure, the way I saw Mom's be: I 
wanted breasts that would captivate boys and make them kiss me and my 
vagina. I wanted to be beautiful and have romance and be closer to God.

Indeed, to me and those around me, penis and vagina were beautiful -- 
juxtaposed they were gorgeous. The sight of semen in Mom's mouth and seeping 
from her vagina; the sight of a sticky penis close to her: these were signs 
of romance and passion and pleasure and religious witnessing. As I grew up, 
I saw girls and boys of 11 or so become excited over the coming changes in 
their bodies and over the pleasure they saw that sex could give. Sure 
enough, within months sex would become a focus of their lives, a parade of 
penises and rivers of semen a source of pride and joy.

I had my own first sexual experiences at the old house at the age of 11 -- 
first helping a boy masturbate, and then, in an accidental nude tumble, 
finding a boy's penis in my vagina. That brought a realization that I had 
the capacity, and so I went on to experiment and found I liked playing with 
penis and having it ejaculate in my mouth and vagina. And that my magical 
clitoris could do what Mom had said it could: give me fabulous shivers. 
There was no going back. Boys and their penises became as much a focus of my 
life as I and my vagina were of theirs. By the time I was 12 I was confident 
that I knew more about the penis and about the vagina, about orgasm and 
semen and puberty than any boy, and I was happy to share what I knew with 
anyone who would listen and would watch. And I could try out my theories on 
virgin boys who struck my fancy. I became, even at that age, a campaigner 
against social hypocrisy; I was a missionary giving an opportunity for  sex 
to pubescent boys with cute penises that I adored, boys I would find around 
the houseboat. I would then send the boys on their way to seduce other girls 
and to spread my faith of sex as religion through "flirty fishing".

Soon thereafter, Mom and I moved from the houseboat to Mom's Friend's House, 
where boy-girl relations were structured and organized in support of the 
theology I described above. There was, for the girl who wanted it, a 
coming-out party where she could celebrate her defloration and her new 
freedom, showing off her vagina as her first penis penetrated it. There were 
regular nude dances; and there was a swimming pool in the back yard (a "nude 
zone") where we could swim, get sexually excited, and pair off to have sex.

By then, indeed even long before then, in 1993, my breasts were a source of 
pride to me for their attraction to boys. I was amazed how, if I could get a 
boy to stare at my breasts his penis might get erect and his demeanor to me 
change entirely. It was great to be nude and free. There was new respect for 
me, a new attention ... and a new need. I developed a certain sexual style 
and attitude and posture and confidence. I had lots of friends from within 
our own "postmodern", post-CoG movement. For all of us, our relationship 
with our mothers was precious. It is a reflection of the total confidence we 
shared with our mothers that when we had sex we were happy for them to be 
watching over us, keeping us safe. Although I must have known that to the 
outside world it was kinky, to us it was absolutely normal and correct for 
our moms to be there while we flirted with a boy, played with his penis, 
made it stiff and took it into mouth or vagina to make it ejaculate. With 
Mom, or our friends, there, it was certain that the boy would kiss and make 
love to my clitoris, my vagina, and make me happy.

Most of those who came to live at or to visit Mom's Friend's House were 
offspring of '60s children -- former members of the Children of God or 
former members of communes. Some, probably most, of the kids had grown up 
amid nudity and public sex. Others were parents of single mothers who were 
open to our free-sex ideas. When Mom's Friend had joined the CoG, her 
parents had set up a trust fund so that she could not touch the capital and 
give it to the Church as so many other members had done, indeed as we were 
expected to. When she left the Church, her trustees bought a big house for 
her to live in and she had a monthly annuity. With that, she could and did 
subsidize likeminded women and their children who weren't so fortunate. But 
to live with her was to accept her philosophy and live according to her 
terms, to raise kids her way, which included making the onset of puberty the 
major event in one's life. And the showing off of an erection, of an 
ejaculation as appropriate, indeed holy; the public taking of a penis into 
her mouth and vagina the sacred duty of every pubescent girl. There were 
always mothers and kids coming and going. I haven't written about the 
internal house politics; you can guess, Dear Reader, that the benevolent 
dictatorship and its sexual theology were not well received by all, even by 
those who needed the charity. Mom was one of few who would stay forever, not 
counting the kids who were more or less abandoned to Mom's Friend's care, 
like the 12-year-old couple I've written about from time to time (see 
below). Our nude dance parties and our outdoor activities attracted kids 
from other free-sex groups and homes, and we always had responsible fun: 
responsible, because we were a closed circuit of adolescents from 12 to 18.

In the past I have tried to set out the intellectual and theological bases 
for what many would call licentious, indeed promiscuous, behavior, but which 
to us was beautiful and devout and normal. Indeed, hard-wired in our 
humanity. For us, penis and vagina represent ultimate beauty and holiness; 
the erection is proof of God's presence and women's power and function. It 
all starts at puberty -- a life change recognized by all religions. I have 
devoted a large part of my writing to anecdotal analysis of this aspect of 
our beliefs and practice: how children of 9 or 10 or 11 would start to pay 
attention to their mothers and siblings and other teens making love and 
then, suddenly at puberty, perhaps with a mother's coaching, would awaken to 
potential of their own changed bodies. And, inevitably, wonder why he or she 
didn't start a week, a month, even a year, earlier. Like most other 
religions we discouraged masturbation; but unlike those others we offered 
something different and better: oral and vaginal sex right at puberty. We 
didn't ban monogamous relationships -- and indeed for some time I was more 
or less faithful to the 16-Year-Old Boy except on occasions when Mom or 
somebody importuned me and led me to a different penis for urgent fun. But 
Mom and Mom's Friend correctly argue that adolescence is a time for pleasure 
and learning. And they say that sexual pleasure depends not at all upon 
love, but rather on romance and on passion.

There is no better illustration of the distance between us and mainstream, 
hypocritical, religion and parenting than a coming-out party to celebrate 
the willing defloration of a young girl. A girl of, say, 13 might choose (as 
two or three or even four a year did over the time I lived at Mom's Friend's 
House) to make a party of her first sexual experience. With her mother and 
her closest friends, boys and girls, seated around her, the candidate would 
sit at the end of a bed while a nominated boy entered, lowered his 
underpants and offered her his penis. Perhaps (if he was 14 or younger) his 
mother would escort him; if not, she might be seated among the other guests. 
The girl would kiss and cuddle the penis; then the boy would kneel in front 
of her and make love to her clitoris and vagina with lips and tongue. When 
the girl arrived at the cusp of climax he would rise up and thrust his penis 
dramatically inside her. The plunge of penis and the piercing of hymen would 
take just a second; the realization by the two lovers of what they've 
accomplished would take a lot longer. Typically, as the penis moved in and 
out, the two of them would alternate their gaze among penis, lover's face 
and mother until the point of ejaculation. Then, with the withdrawal of the 
penis, came the real "trophy", as Mom's Friend characterized it: the lovely, 
semen-coated penis to be hugged and kissed. The sight of it would bring me 
every time to thinking of my own lover's penis. That of course was the 
point, and it's why the debutante would have invited not only her closest 
friends but suitable partners for those friends -- so they could have sex 
too and ratify her defloration. I thought it was particularly nice when the 
debutante stayed behind a few minutes to watch her friends make love: to see 
how her defloration had aroused them, to see penises in vaginas and moving 
in and out, ejaculating semen, bringing joy.

------

I've written often enough of how brothers and sisters would come to be 
comfortable making love in each other's presence, their own orgasm enhanced 
by the sight of an excited brotherly penis or sisterly vagina. This occurred 
because boys could generally not join us unless sponsored by a girl, so 
siblings and cousins were often pressed into accompanying an eager boy who'd 
been invited to one of our nude dance parties. It also happened when a 
mother brought her whole family; and of course there were brothers and 
sisters who'd been with us since toddlerhood. For mainstream families, 
brothers and sisters having sex in proximity may violate a social norm, but 
it's a ridiculous norm easily discarded once brother and sister are nude 
together, once they are aroused in a sexy environment. And for kids brought 
up nude together, taught to watch for the signs of puberty and appreciate 
the development of secondary sex characteristics, it is even more normal and 
lovely. It was really cute to hear brother-sister banter over the loveliness 
of a partner, over the state of a penis, over the sight of semen. There is, 
in fact, nothing nicer for a girl than to see her brother's penis in the 
vagina of her best friend; or for a boy his best friend's penis in the 
vagina of his sister. There would be many different motivations for mothers 
to bring their kids to us, the most common being a background in the CoG and 
free sex, interrupted perhaps by some time (years or months) in a "normal" 
relationship. With a marital breakup, mothers might come to us out of 
intellectual or financial need, out of religious commitment, out of spite, 
or simply out of concern for her children's sexual development. It was for 
this latter group that the occasional "introductory lecture" talks were most 
useful.

The "spite" cases are among the most interesting. I recall one mother who'd 
been active in the CoG as a teen and come to enjoy having sex with new 
partners day by day. She married and was faithful but after a few years 
caught her husband philandering. At that point she reverted to her past 
type, and her husband absconded: a classic double-standard situation. The 
mother came to live with us for a year while she went back to school for 
retraining and then looked for work. Her first move was to send her kids, a 
boy of 12 or 13 and a girl of 14 to hear Mom's Friend and "Rev. X" speak at 
the start of one of Mom's Friend's "summer camps". These holidays at Mom's 
Friend's House were (in addition to ordinary fun and games) a mixture of sex 
education, religious indoctrination and New Age enlightenment. The kids did 
not disrobe right away, although Rev. X made clear his view that you are 
closest to God when you are "undressed, as you came into the world" and that 
that communion with God is a matter of a collectivity of males and females 
"in pairs as one" rejoicing "bilaterally but communally", whatever that 
meant. He was leading up to the point that orgasm is Holy Communion and that 
semen is the Host and that sexual joy is multiplied when it is shared -- 
when couples have sex in tandem.

First there would sex-ed films and transparencies, including some really 
clever productions that ought to be shown in schools: pseudo-time-lapse 
photography showing the passage of a boy and a girl through puberty and the 
development of their sex organs. I guess they must have been made with 
artistic software of the kind missing persons bureaus use for "aging" facial 
images. I know that breasts can be enlarged via software, but the really 
clever artistry was showing penis and testicle development and pubic hair 
growth, including showing how the penis looks when erect at various ages. 
Mom's Friend said that now was the most important part: we'd see (as if we 
didn't already know) how that penis would be made to give a girl semen. 
There was a film of a pair of 18-year-olds who looked more like 14 doing 
what we do: with friends about, everybody nude, the couple performed oral 
sex by way of foreplay. Then the boy acted out a defloration, positioning 
the girl's vagina just right and pushing his penis into it while she looked 
on apprehensively. When he was done, there was semen and blood and 
everything visible. The girl got really excited over the penis afterwards 
and started cuddling it. The message, of course, was for the girls: that 
defloration doesn't hurt and that you can indeed have an orgasm the first 
time and every time thanks to oral sex as foreplay. A slight exaggeration 
perhaps, but reassuring for the girls in the audience. There was a video of 
a circumcision. Mom's Friend was very firm about the contribution of 
circumcision to good health, safe sex and maximum pleasure and in the past 
some mothers had to have their boys circumcised before they would be allowed 
to live with us and join our parties. This is best done before puberty. The 
main point was that passionate sex as Holy Communion, starting with loving 
caresses of tongue on penis and clitoris and leading to penis in vagina and 
ejaculation of semen, should be like a tent revival, leading to a crescendo 
of faith, commitment and salvation.

There were practical lessons on what goes on inside the body. On the 
assumption that even if they have a course in sex ed at school boys know 
less than nothing about menstruation except the base canard that it is 
somehow dirty, Rev. X had a boy come forward and change a girl's tampon. 
Later, that boy would have to bring her to climax with oral sex, proving the 
falsity of those religions, Judaism in particular, that disallow sex during 
periods and impose a ritual bath on girls and women.

The spite-case mother's visit had been impelled by her daughter having 
walked in on her brother while he was masturbating. The daughter found the 
incident highly amusing, but hearing about it, the mother remembered an 
early argument -- not necessarily in the CoG but more likely from Mom's 
Friend -- that masturbation (onanism) was wrong and boys and girls who are 
seen doing it should immediately be introduced to boy-girl sex. It was this 
that brought them to the camp. Even before they came, the mother had 
assembled her two kids and told them everything they had ever heard about 
sex was incorrect, and that they needed to re-learn it all. She also said 
that since the daughter had seen her brother's penis it was time for all 
three of them to practice family nudity. They would start by visiting Mom's 
Friend's House for nude swimming. Apparently she didn't mention then that 
they would probably be having sex; that was left to the professionals, Rev. 
X and Mom's Friend, to explain.

I was more or less in a relationship with the 16-Year-Old Boy at that time, 
but I was happy at Mom's Friend's request to look after the new boy. The 
16-Year-Old Boy was to see to the new girl. Neither of us would have been at 
the lecture if we hadn't been assigned to escort -- and to seduce -- those 
newcomers. I think the lecture on the nature of the penis as Messenger of 
God and semen as His message was largely lost on the new kids, but I did see 
various mothers nodding approvingly at appropriate times. Then there was a 
discussion of puberty (based on the pictures) and of biblical stuff: the 
meaning of the duty to be fruitful, the debasement of semen when it is lost 
on the ground, and so on. And a discussion of the ages of Biblical 
characters when they first had sex. And the definition of "marriage", a 
sacrament only in formal Christianity; for most religions just a contract. 
One hardly had to mention pre-marital sex: I don't think there are any 
virgin brides in America anymore; certainly not if they aren't allowing 
13-year-olds to marry. By now I think all the kids were both excited and 
apprehensive about the prospect of sex, which was, of course, the point. But 
first they had to have lunch.

There were sandwiches in the back yard, and nude swimming. Inevitably, some 
of the newcomers felt discomfort in being told to undress completely. Those 
who hesitated found that there was no provision for bathing suits and that 
once underpants get wet they don't conceal very much. By now, no girl was 
wearing a bra because Mom's Friend and the various parents -- naked 
themselves by now -- had made them take them off. Soon the few boys and 
girls still wearing underpants looked out of step, their crotches more 
objects of examination than they would have been uncovered. Each new kid had 
been paired off with a potential partner, the purpose ostensibly being not 
to coerce the newcomer into having sex but to make it easy for him or her to 
choose, and to provide the instrument -- penis or vagina -- for choosing. 
And for girls to see the mechanics of the penis, and to want to make friends 
with it. Rev. X, whom some called a "dirty old man" behind his back, walked 
through the crowd inviting girls to "get to know" their partner's penis, 
repeating over and over that the penis is God's instrument. He pointed to 
his own penis, and said that hiding or suppressing an erection is 
"nonsense": it should be a source of pride and is sacred, pleasure-giving, 
beautiful. It was a ludicrous exhortation, I thought: literally true, but 
his penis was an inappropriate example and the context was wrong. The kids 
anyway ignored him and took their cues from the mothers who were there and 
from each other. One of the mothers decided that the best way to get Rev. X 
out of the picture was to have sex with him and so she took him off, penis 
and all, to a corner of the back yard not to be seen again that day. I 
personally don't know why Mom's Friend put up with Rev. X for so many years. 
Nor do I know why I myself would let him put his penis inside my vagina on 
my 18th birthday, but that's another story.

I was, as always, eager to show a virgin boy his potential. As was so often 
the case, my nudity and the fear of not being able to cope seemed to have 
made the New Boy too nervous to have an erection. But by now I could see 
very clearly the outline of his penis, a lovely penis, circumcised as I 
could see from its outline in the nylon, manly except that he had little 
pubic hair. Still, there were obvious fears of inadequacy with his sister 
and his mom looking on. I pressed my breasts against him, rubbed my hand 
over his clothed penis, and invited him to play with my body. When he 
started to do that I said I definitely wanted to see his penis, and I pulled 
his elastic away. I reached in and fondled his penis and his balls, and 
kissed him. Then, ignoring his anxiety, I knelt and pulled his briefs down. 
That brought my mouth level with his penis, and I started to kiss and suck 
on it. Even a reluctant or apprehensive penis can generally be excited and 
made erect that way. And then even if it isn't fully erect it can be made to 
ejaculate in your mouth. With luck, once a boy has come in your mouth he'll 
have another erection soon after -- born of his new confidence -- and then 
his penis will slide nicely in your vagina, still be wet and slippery. In 
this case I didn't have to go through all that. Even with his sister and the 
others looking on, I succeeded in making New Boy's penis stiff. He was then 
happy to play with my vagina and, after a moment's hesitation, to kiss it 
the way he'd seen done on screen. This, he averred, was going to be a lot 
better than masturbation.

By now New Boy had apparently forgotten about his sister and his mother; 
anyway he had stopped glancing over at them and worrying about them 
watching. His penis was sticking out only slightly drooped from 90 degrees. 
I lay down, pulling him with me, and I stuffed his penis inside my vagina. 
He took the initiative from there, pumping up and down. He was going faster 
than I would have liked, but this was his day so I said nothing. He had his 
first ejaculation inside a girl, me, and I saw a bizarre expression on his 
face. I thought I would try something heroic, to make him overcome any 
reluctance he might have to taste his own semen in my vagina. This was 
something every boy should be taught. I had him lie back, and then I got on 
top of him with my vagina at his mouth and his penis at mine. Not only did I 
want to experience the traces of his semen, above all I wanted him to give 
me an orgasm. It might not be my best orgasm ever, but it would be good 
enough. And the whole enterprise was a good and sexy show for the other 
kids, and a memorable event for the mother and sister who by now were paying 
close attention. By the time we were done, most of the others were having 
sex except the sister and the 16-Year-Old Boy. He was watching me with an 
expression of mild jealousy. And New Girl was holding on to him impatiently.

New Girl didn't have any measurable breasts but she did have biggish nipples 
and an attractive vulva. She was naked, lying back, and her legs were spread 
apart with her inner labia exposed. The 16-Year-Old Boy positioned her on a 
low serving table we often used for sex when we wanted it to be in full view 
of others. From where they stood, New Girl's mother and brother would have a 
direct view of the action. The 16-Year-Old Boy had her brother and me steady 
her legs as he knelt down, put his head between them and began kissing and 
licking her pink parts. Before, New Girl had been tense; now that she was 
feeling tongue on clitoris she began to relax. It didn't seem to matter that 
her brother and mother were there, nor that her sex parts were exposed to 
the whole world. All that mattered was the sexual electricity that was 
building up.

New Boy stared at his sister's crotch; I told him jokingly that it was rude 
to stare, especially with his penis sticking out the way it was. He took me 
seriously and turned his head away, but continued watching out of the corner 
of an eye. The 16-Year-Old Boy's tongue was now inside New Girl's vagina and 
moving about, in and out and around. He jerked his head about a lot and 
lifted it up from time to time to inspect the state of his girl's vagina and 
so we could see most of what he was doing. Her spread-apart labia, all her 
lovely pink parts inside, saliva and mucus dripping down -- it made for a 
beautiful, sexy sight. At this point the 16-Year-Old Boy's grand penis was 
sticking out impressively and I felt an pressing need to see it penetrate 
her. I had no feelings of jealousy whatsoever; rather, I was delighted to be 
seeing from close up the technique the 16-Year-Old Boy had so often used on 
me and to make me happy.

When the cunnilingus reached its apex and New Girl began to sigh and cry 
out, the 16-Year-Old Boy stood up and showed her his big penis. She nodded 
and he leaned forward, plunging it firmly into her vagina. It was lovely and 
dramatic, done with force enough to break through the most resistant hymen. 
Minutes later but soon enough, in the manner of the sex performer who calls 
himself Prick James, the 16-Year-Old Boy ejaculated and pinkish semen leaked 
out of the vagina for all of us to enjoy. 
http://www.creampie.com/tour/video/kayla_paige05.ram It was a fantastic 
moment, the more so because New Girl had been able to watch the penis moving 
in and out and because her mom and her brother had been there to remember 
the moment.

Ejaculating just inside the vaginal opening so semen will spill out is a 
trick boys learn once they get used to being watched. When they've figured 
out, or been told, how extended oral foreplay increases their semen 
production and provides extra liquidity to facilitate seepage they quite 
naturally fall in with the sexual agenda that Mom and Mom's Friend promoted. 
Now the 16-Year-Old Boy pulled New Girl from the table onto the ground and 
helped her into a kneeling position, her face directly at his penis. He took 
his penis, wet and sticky, and brought it to her lips. She dutifully opened 
her mouth and took it inside and, following the girl she'd seen on the film, 
tasted the her own fluids together with his semen. She looked the 
16-Year-Old Boy in the eyes, and smiled. I was amazing to me that she had 
not only acquiesced to trying a lifestyle that must have been foreign to 
her, but that she so gleefully accepted it.

I wondered whether the 16-Year-Old Boy hadn't taken his cue from me in what 
he did. At least he gave New Boy and New Girl something to talk about, an 
experience to share of semen as Communion Host, semen in mouth, at the 
moment of their abandoning virginity. I had to give Rev. X credit for 
something: many or most mainstream girls aren't willing to take into their 
mouths a sticky penis just out of their vaginas, or boys put their mouths to 
a vagina that is full of their semen.

New Girl's mom had, by this time, discovered one of the college boys who had 
once been regulars at our activities but were now past their 19th birthday 
and on their own. She was now playing with that boy's penis Mrs. 
Robinson-fashion. I don't know if this was the first time she'd lounged 
about in the nude in front of her kids, but their expressions made it 
obvious that they'd never seen a penis in their mom's mouth before. More's 
the pity, I should think: my Mom kept no secrets from me, and wanted me to 
know how people make love, and how lovely it, and semen, are. And how a 
penis belongs in her mouth. The point is that a penis -- most penises, 
anyway -- fit nicely in a mouth and are responsive to a girl's tongue and 
lips. And any girl who has not been conditioned by social engineers to be 
horrified by sex parts and by semen will take naturally to a penis sliding 
into her mouth and will close her lips around it and make it ejaculate for 
her. Whether she swallows all the semen or not she can and should taste and 
enjoy and swallow enough to bring her to a contemplative, sacred and 
passionate state. This is what New Girl's mom did. She had possession of a 
really lovely penis and she kept it aroused and stiff and delayed its orgasm 
forever. And then she began moving her head more rapidly and semen began to 
rush into her mouth, some spilling out for us to see, and it was beautiful: 
penis and mouth and semen and the expressions of both lovers. When she had 
finished licking off all the semen that had dripped onto penis and balls her 
boy knelt in front of her chair and kissed and licked at her vagina, 
stroking it all over with his tongue. It was an expression of romantic 
appreciation that was very gratifying because it told us that sex and orgasm 
are for life, not just for adolescence. I have to attribute dysfunction, 
common as it is in the outside world, to the secrecy and closed doors of 
most parents and friends and older siblings. Most kids who start sex early, 
say at 11 or 12 or 13, take naturally to oral (and relatively safe) sex. If 
parents were to be open about sex, and to teach that sex is as much about 
sharing and seeing and being seen, and supervise and encourage safe 
practices, "underage sex" would be turned from a danger and a liability into 
a family delight and a normal part of emotional and physical development.

The point is that kids need to learn about compatibility and technique so 
that, given that we think eventual monogamy and the founding of a family is 
a good thing, young people will have adequate criteria to judge potential 
life partners. We all know that many marriages fail because of sexual 
incompatibility. Ineptitude and dysfunction are demonstrably reduced among 
those who come early to sex, and more especially among those who attribute a 
religious significance to orgasm and who understand the need for sharing and 
for community. As usual, an event with many new kids meant new assignations, 
new opportunities for pairing off. There is, as I have often written, no 
"best" penis, although I once sponsored a spoof contest that pretended there 
was. http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2004/47514 I have my preferences in matters 
of size and shape, and I think (based on practical experience as well as 
esthetics and the best medical information) that circumcision is vital, but 
variety is otherwise nice. That said, with experience once learns that, 
within limits, functionality is more important than appearance: beauty 
fades, dumb is forever, etc. A penis should be big enough to manipulate and 
to maneuver, and it should impress when it is seen entering a girl's vagina 
and look nice when held and displayed after sex. (When it comes to penis in 
mouth, size relatively unimportant, and huge size is a disadvantage.) But 
judgment is subjective and relative in these matters. As a girl who in her 
early teens made love to dozens and dozens of pubescent, growing penises I 
can affirm that the excitement is in the anticipation and pleasure is in the 
sharing of orgasm and the exchange of sacred bodily fluids. So, on that day 
as at all the events we had, whether coming-out party, picnic, barbecue, 
sports day, nude dance, and so on, while we were bound to a single partner 
for that day we were always looking at penises and faces and thinking of 
tomorrow.

------

One of the delights of our nude dance parties was the opportunity to show 
your boy's penis off to other girls: a penis stiff just for you, desperate 
to be inside your body. In this situation, some girls did indeed insist that 
"biggest is bestest". It's perverse, but girls gain stature through their 
ability to keep their partner's penis erect for long periods of time. I can 
understand better the credit due to a girl for manipulating the penis with 
her mouth and making a display of ejaculation and being dainty and holy as 
semen collects at the bottom of her mouth. But the simple fact that she 
keeps him on tenterhooks all night, constantly teasing his penis into 
erection, shouldn't affect her place in the pecking order. It's a game I 
never played, with the result that I was usually one of the first girls at 
the party to have sex. My reward was that often we'd recover our libido 
while the party was still hot, and we'd have a second round of sex while 
some others were having their first.

Getting back to my story, on the day in question I discovered one of the 
cutest penises I have come to know. A 14-year-old boy had been brought to us 
by his divorced dad. He was one of those fathers who contrive to make sex 
available to his son as soon as the son reaches puberty, and apparently he 
had moved to Our Town and resumed an acquaintanceship with Mom's Friend. 
Later he would often come by to take out one of the various mothers staying 
with us; and I would see him occasionally having sex off in a corner of the 
back yard. He had a background consistent with ours, and apparently had 
brought up his son the same way, or as much as can be done in mainstream 
life. The boy was paired with one of the sexy but vapid girls who were 
always around and always preening, and whom I almost never mention in these 
stories unless it is to describe in clinical detail a penis that is inside 
her. The boy was standing behind her, with his hands fondling her breasts 
and from time to time his penis, ramrod stiff, would wave at me, peeking out 
from behind her hips. It wasn't particularly long, just about 6 inches I 
think. What was interesting about it was that it was about an inch in 
diameter at the base, widening to seemingly (but probably not in reality) an 
inch and a half at the tip; and the tip was almost perfectly round -- very 
kissable indeed. His balls seemed large, although I would discover that 
their appearance was deceptive and they were ordinary size. It was his 
scrotum that was large, or loose anyway, and which gave his testicles free 
rein to move about. I found that unlike a lot of boys he was scarcely 
ticklish at all, and I could play with them to my heart's content.

The boy was somewhat shy and seemed embarrassed by my staring at his penis; 
he looked to his girl for protection. She, however, was too busy to help, 
showing off her breasts and inner labia and thinking of her next date (well, 
weren't we all). Perhaps she was annoyed to be partnered by a naive, 
inexperienced boy. Meanwhile, I used the excuse of his shyness to confront 
him, to set up a potential future liaison. While I tried to be discreet 
about it and not insult or turn him off, it can't have been 
confidence-building for New Boy that I was staring at another boy's penis 
and that I asked that other boy whether he wouldn't like to listen the next 
day to my CD collection. I desperately wanted to touch and feel and hold 
this special penis that looked so much like an ice-cream cone. I wanted 
desperately to inspect and lick and taste it, and to give and get pleasure 
with it. I even hoped I could get to see semen flowing from it that day. But 
it came to me that I had an obligation to New Boy next to me, and that he 
had something to offer, too, and that weaning him from masturbation to 
girl-sex was my responsibility and I should make the whole day a fun time 
for him.

For us, below driving age, there was total dependence on our parents to get 
around, at least in respect of visits to and from the homes of kids who 
lived away from our part of Our Town. Either Ice-Cream Boy's Dad or my Mom 
would have to bring him. I decided to arrange a sleepover, and a half-dozen 
kids -- in fact four girls and two boys -- were assigned partners at random 
by me. And I assigned myself Ice-Cream Cone Boy. So, on Saturday at noon he 
and the others would come by for a barbecue, and the 12 of us would spend 
the afternoon at sport and the evening listening to records and enjoying 
penises and vaginas and at night we would pair off into our single beds and 
cuddle naked.

I never cease to be amazed at how scrotums shrink when cold and wet. I told 
Ice-Cream Cone Boy, when he came out of the pool, that something had to be 
done to warm him up. He said he wasn't cold, but I pointed to his balls and 
dried them off with a towel and cupped them with my hand. His penis started 
to get excited, which was a good sign; and as I saw it fill out and rise up 
I got aroused too and forgot about my mission. Then I remembered my policy 
of not allowing a boy, the first time we had sex, to ejaculate before I at 
least came to the threshold of climax. I was on the ground seated, and I lay 
back against a tree, my legs bent, and spread them wide and asked him to 
play with my clitoris and to kiss it. His hesitation told me that he needed 
some training, so I pointed to what I wanted him to do, and asked if he 
didn't believe there was something holy about our sex parts and that I 
thought his penis was lovely and couldn't wait to have it in my mouth. 
Feminist confidence and male lust usually get the boy's tongue where you 
want it to be in such a situation, and this was no exception. His jerky 
movements had made kids stop and look, and so he was under peer pressure to 
perform. It turned out not to have been the first time he had kissed a 
vagina, but the girls he had done it to either hadn't shown proper 
appreciation or hadn't made it sufficiently pleasurable and rewarding for 
him; anyway the taste of vaginal fluids and blood and the occasional taste 
of one's own semen are acquired tastes, and lovely because of their context 
and their sacred origins. I only wished that he'd had me, or someone like 
me, to initiate him, the way I had initiated New Boy a few days before. (New 
Boy was there on that day, and, wanting perhaps to show he was more eager, 
and therefore more deserving, than Ice-Cream Cone Boy, he had positioned his 
girl on the ground put his mouth over her vulva and his tongue inside, and 
was in the process of moving his legs over her and his stiff penis, pointing 
directly downwards, over her mouth.)

Within a minute or two, Ice-Cream Cone Boy had overcome his hesitations and 
his tongue was dancing in my vagina. After a while I had him concentrate his 
tongue on my clitoris. I must have been the first girl to give him explicit 
instructions and to tell him exactly what felt the best, and to make him do 
it. I was feeling very warm inside, I didn't think it would take me very 
long to reach climax. Meanwhile I took New Boy's initiative at mutual oral 
sex as a challenge: after all, hadn't I taught him everything he knew, and I 
hadn't done "69" with him -- he must have learned it by watching others. In 
fact, he was wise to approach the girl from above, because for young boys 
that's more practical; also it gives him more control of what is happening 
to his penis and, if he is really clever, enables him to try to time his 
orgasm to the pace of his girl's.

I thought Ice-Cream Cone Boy's penis would look grand in mutual oral sex 
with me on top, and it was certainly large enough for that position. So we 
went about it, and now, having learned his lesson, Ice-Cream Boy took almost 
my entire vaginal area into his mouth and kissed and licked it and I began 
to feel that I was losing control and would have my climax right away. Which 
is exactly what happened. I don't usually shriek much, or at all; but that 
time I did and it caused people to stare. Which perhaps was just as well, 
because I got back to attending to my responsibilities and began treating 
his penis like the ice-cream cone it resembled, running my tongue around and 
around its tip. Then I got more serious with it and pressed my lips tightly 
against it, running my tongue over its slit and moving my head up and down 
in a regular cadence timed to match Ice-Cream Boy's hip movements. It did 
not take more than five minutes for his semen to stream out into my mouth, 
spurting in response to each of my downward strokes. With the oral foreplay 
he had built up a lot of semen, and there were four or maybe five spurts -- 
a lot, I thought. In reality, once I moved over and sat up and measured the 
semen on my tongue, it couldn't have been more than a teaspoon plus whatever 
had leaked out and glistened on his penis and scrotum. But I felt it was a 
great success, and after showing off to everybody what was on my tongue, I 
swallowed it. Then I kissed and licked his penis once more, and made him put 
it in my vagina. He didn't last more than a dozen strokes that way before he 
had to stop. He lay next to me for a few minutes and then came back to life 
and wanted to play with my breasts and run his fingers through my pubic hair 
and along the crack of my vulva. I watched his penis, relaxed and curled, 
and I admired his testicles as they moved about in response to his 
heartbeat. I'd had enough for the moment and I knew I should let my boy 
recover his strength and his libido so that we could have more fun that 
night during the sleepover. Meanwhile it was enough that we were naked 
together and that everybody could admire his lovely sticky penis, my trophy.

My day with New Boy, although "imposed" on me by Mom's Friend, and my day 
and night afterwards with Ice-Cream Cone Boy more or less marked the 
beginning of the end of my relationship with the 16-Year-Old Boy, who would 
soon be going away anyhow. Mom was glad to see an end to my "monogamy", just 
as I think she was glad (for a different, indeed opposite, reason) to see an 
end to my period of recruitment and seduction of pubescent boys. Indeed that 
might have been a reason, beyond the end of her affair with its owner, for 
our hasty departure from the houseboat. She encouraged and approved of 
"controlled multiplicity" of adolescent sex partners: one was too few, and 
going outside a closed circuit of boys known to be healthy and known not to 
be having sex outside the group was too risky. It goes without saying that 
such assumptions could only work if kids' sexual activity was parentally 
supervised and approved in the first place. For me to rush over to Mom, as 
an 11- or 12-year old, with a boy whose penis had just ejaculated semen 
(whether a drop or a teaspoonful) into me, and for her to show delight in 
the boy's wet, half-erect penis, was a matter of assuring my own security 
within our "rules" and recommendations. The same is true of a young girl's 
pride in the semen she has taken into her mouth to swallow, allowing 
rivulets to trickle down onto her breasts in testimony. Let it not be 
naively assumed that such a practice is totally outr�: much of what happens 
in American subcultures has to be seen and/or experienced to be believed. 
Think, for example, of the "toothing" story, supposedly "invented" as a 
journalistic parody or joke. Here's an article from an Israeli newspaper 
that I found on the Internet about that: 
http://www.angelfire.com/co4/cobil/toothing.html

------

I haven't much talked about the adults in our lives. Our ethic considered 
(and considers) "monogamy" as an "ideal" for adult -- but not adolescent or 
pre-adolescent -- relationships. The fact remains that most but not all the 
girls and boys who came to Mom's Friend's House to live or to visit were 
from single-parent families, more often than not headed by single mothers. 
Most, but certainly not all, the mothers had been free and open in front of 
their kids in their sexual relationships and had encouraged nudity about the 
house, so when they came to Mom's Friend's House there would be seamless 
assimilation. A girl or boy who was comfortable seeing his or her mother 
playing with a new partner's penis, kissing it, and then happily receiving 
semen from it, will grow up both sexually aware and sexually confident, as I 
have shown in previous essays, citing literature and experience in support. 
Obviously no population of human beings is free from stupidity, unsocial 
behavior, ineptitude and venality. But the nature of our population -- 
intellectual, generous and kind, for the most part -- limited the size of 
the disruptive and anti-social element that we had to exclude. A child who 
is comfortable naked in front of parents, siblings and friends and who knows 
that she or he will, at the age of puberty, begin having sex in their 
company, one who is happy to show and discuss his or her sex parts in front 
of family and close friends -- such a person is bound to have a special 
personality and a positive attitude and outlook. He or she is also likely to 
accept a parent's or an older sibling's need for regular sex as a normal 
part of bodily function and personal pleasure. Even small children are 
capable of appreciating these facts. For them, the sight of mature penis and 
vagina is boring once basic biological curiosity has been satisfied. Years 
later, though, they -- we -- retained the lessons learned and, lessons we 
would in due course put to good use.

Thus: kids scarcely took notice of their parent(s) and other adults who took 
advantage of the easy nudity and the presence of similarly-minded potential 
partners. Adult sex was not flaunted although neither was it hidden. I think 
most kids were quite pleased to know what the adults were doing -- and 
content pretty much to ignore it in favor of sex play with their own peers 
and, perhaps, observing the antics of those a year or so older. No child was 
ever threatened by an adult erection or an adult libido or an adult sex act 
because none of these was ever directed at an infant. Or, indeed, at any but 
a member of one's own peer group. This is the beauty of Mom's Friend's 
concept of romance and lovemaking and religious manifestation, and it is 
where she came to differ, and to part ways, from David Berg and the CoG. And 
other churches that make claims to be sexually different.

Among these, the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints, Colorado City, 
Arizona, has been in the news lately. I've mentioned it before, and it is 
worth mentioning again to stress how we differed from all abusive sects. 
Like Moses David, the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints 
http://www.angelfire.com/co4/cobil/coloradocity.html is sex-driven, although 
it doesn't admit that, and its adherents dress modestly in public. It is 
also polygamous and centered around underage sex -- but, as in the old CoG, 
that involves mostly older man and adolescent, indeed pubescent ("trainee 
wife") girls. Needless to say, I have nothing against pubescent girls having 
sex but their sex should be with boys their own age and without coercion. 
And in lieu of polygamy, or rather polygyny, I would say that there has to 
be mutuality: the girl, too, is entitled to multiple partners at her whim 
and fancy. She should not be kept in submission and ignorance; she must be 
assured personal autonomy and sexual equality. Co-ed nudity and sexual 
freedom, not long dresses and purdah -- are what assure her entitlement.

It is fairly easy to identify the motivation of the leaders of the 
Fundamentalist LDS church, as it was to spot the motivation of David Berg: 
lust and greed, to the point of misogyny. Mom's Friend and her colleagues 
agreed with Berg's theological basis for early and easy sex. Beyond that, 
Mom's Friend particularly -- a few girls characterized it as "hysterically" 
-- promoted oral sex as foreplay to implement her vision of semen as Host 
and also to compensate for difficulty many of her girls had in achieving 
orgasm. The main thrust of her argument is, however, that of mutuality, 
reciprocity, and feminism: that girls can should take the dominant role in 
directing lovemaking; that girls can take the role of Priestess; that her 
manipulation of the penis and her taking it in her mouth is the ultimate 
exercise of control. Her reception of the Communion Host, her partner's 
semen, makes of her a holy vessel, a sacred chalice. Semen inside a woman 
marks her as servant of God; her pleasure in receiving it is her reward for 
obeying a Biblical command. That's why she must be seen when she takes the 
penis in her body: by parents, friends, family, audience of past and future 
lovers and of loving members of her circle. Sex must never be humiliating 
and it must never be selfish: a girl must welcome the penis and be seen to 
welcome it, which is why she must always kiss and cuddle and take it in her 
mouth, and the boy must kiss and lick her clitoris and place his tongue in 
her vagina as a prelude to coitus. The notion of semen in a girl's mouth 
cannot be humiliation when it represents Holy Communion. And it is the 
essence of adolescence to share, to change partners, to come to know many 
boys, many penises.

Mom didn't approve of my limiting myself -- for the months that I did so -- 
to the 16-Year-Old Boy for the very reason that, as she said, adolescence is 
for evangelizing, for sharing ourselves and our "good news", for "flirty 
fishing" that Moses David ordained, all within our circle of friends of 
faith. There was no place among us for jealousy or for claim to exclusivity. 
I think that was why she and Mom's Friend so undermined our relationship, 
such as it was. There were also the points that the 16-Year-Old Boy was 
Mom's Friend's nephew and that his was virtually the only case where the age 
rule (that a girl under 18 should have sex only with boys within 10% of her 
own age) was regularly relaxed or ignored. Exclusivity leads to pride and 
arrogance, she said; and I think that's correct. Those two kids still 
growing up at Mom's Friend's House -- the ones who watched me at sex all 
those years ago and who one pubescent day showed off their own oral and 
vaginal sex to Mom and me -- are a special exception for the obvious reason 
that by the time they reached sexual maturity they were virtually the only 
kids still there.

(I was away much of the time either at college or at work, and so every time 
I would visit I would marvel and delight at the growth and development of 
their bodies -- penis, breasts, height, sexuality. Here's what I wrote about 
them back in 2002 when they really were about 12; they are, of course, older 
now:

("The kids occasionally watched us having sex after that but I do not 
remember them asking more questions about it. But very recently, when I was 
back in Our Town for a long weekend, I was sunning myself in the garden 
along with Mom, both of us nude, when the girl and the boy, now almost 12, 
came dancing out holding each other's hand. They told me they had something 
they wanted to show me. The boy and girl were both in mid puberty. I could 
see her cute little breasts and her wisps of pubic hair; I could see his 
penis in mid-growth and that he too had just a bit of hair there. They held 
hands and smiled, and then he was on the ground on his back and she was 
reversed above him, her mouth at his penis, just as I had shown them so many 
years ago. Her legs were spread wide apart, knees on the ground at either 
side of his head. All of her vaginal area was exposed, a lovely 
11-1/2-year-old pubescent, angelic vagina, and the boy had his tongue 
already in it moving in and out and around and his lips were sucking on her 
labia, her clitoris, her vulva. She was sucking on his penis and it was 
growing hard; she started moving her head up and down its not-yet 
fully-grown length. She meanwhile groaned with obvious pleasure. After 
several minutes had passed she cried out "now" and did a gymnastic flip, 
landing on her back alongside the boy, her legs wide apart with knees bent, 
her vagina open, waiting expectantly. The boy quickly turned over and around 
and mounted her, his penis sticking out downwards very stiff, wet from her 
saliva. She guided his penis into her vagina, and he proceeded to pump her 
as she acknowledged his thrusts with more sighs. After a couple of minutes 
of slow thrusts he speeded up his pace, grunted, gasped and rolled over next 
to her, sitting up. He caught his breath, rose and pulled her to her feet 
with one hand. The two of them skipped over to Mom and me. I was so happy 
for them. I hugged them closely. The boy's penis was glistening wet all 
over. Not five inches long, it remained erect, quivering. I wanted to close 
my hand around it and squeeze it tenderly, to stroke its glowing tip, to cup 
his cute testicles. A drop of liquid flowed out of the little opening. I 
would touch it, it would stick to my finger, and I would put it on my tongue 
and smile. I kissed the boy and the girl on their cheeks and told them I 
loved them both, that they were beautiful. It was one of the most fabulous 
moments of my life." http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/38098 )

It's three years later and those kids are still there, the only teens left. 
True, we have an annual reunion and lots of friends and former residents and 
visitors bring children and even grandchildren. But that's about the only 
time there are other sexually-aware and -active teenagers about, and it's 
only for a weekend. I have never asked, and don't know if either or both 
have sex with others. I do know that they look lovely together and even 
lovelier when they are in the throes of sex. My Blond-Haired Boy, originally 
seduced by me on the houseboat close to his 13th birthday 
http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/37597 saw them having shameless sex -- saw 
the boy's memorable penis push its way into the girl's vagina and saw on 
their faces the same magnificent innocence I had seen when they were 12 
years old. And the expression of incredible pleasure, as if it were still 
their first time. With the boy's penis now out of her vagina and sticking 
straight up in the air, they asked if we wouldn't like to be having sex too. 
We couldn't resist, much to Mom's amusement. I felt like a teenager again, 
kissing by boy's penis, having him kiss and lick my vagina, and then seeing 
his penis
approach and enter. The two kids watched us, probably to remind themselves 
of what they looked like with penis in vagina, and smiled broadly when they 
saw that we had climaxed.

I like to take credit for having taught those kids about sex when they were 
still toddlers and I couldn't complain if they wanted to be reminded of what 
they had seen. The only others whom I taught and still see are the Blond 
Haired Boy and Terrific Girl, who look upon me as a mentor and who watched 
as I experimented with that sleeping boy's penis to see if I could make him 
ejaculate without waking him. http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/37631 I guess I 
shouldn't have been surprised that exposing Terrific Girl to an adventure 
would draw her into having sex. Right away her attitude towards penises 
changed and she gradually became fixated. As she later said, she developed a 
urges to play with a penis that, in due course, she couldn't resist. And why 
should she have?

You can read Terrific Girl's own words about how she came to make oral love 
to a penis for the first time, and how she followed up with vaginal sex: 
http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/38968 . Her first period had been a brief 
source of embarrassment, followed by a awareness of opportunity and 
emotional extravagance. She quickly learned how to sit cross-legged with her 
inner labia showing and how she could be sexy even before her breasts 
reached optimum size. Her father posted a chart for her to mark her 
measurements on, month by month, and she began to keep a diary like mine, 
which graded all the boys she had sex with, including comments about their 
penis and their tongue. But that all came later: her first sex was, like 
mine, an act upon an inspiration and an impulse. A boy's penis had responded 
to her nudity and was pointing stiffly at her; on impulse she took it in her 
mouth. And all the while, she says, she could almost hear Nat King Cole and 
Mom's Friend in chorus singing "Too Young", but really taking delight at her 
adventure. When the day was done and we were in bed, we made Terrific Girl 
re-live the entire party and describe her every action and feeling. I think 
it was then that we convinced her that like Nabokov's and Humbert's Lolita, 
her vagina was perfectly able to accommodate a penis, especially a young 
teen's penis, and that her hymen was holding her back from serious fun and 
pleasure.

Normally, even though I had my first sex at that age, I would not have 
sought to induce an 11-yar-old to start having sex, especially vaginal sex: 
I think 12 or 13 is better. But Terrific Girl had been close to me, and she 
had acted so sexy the night of the oral sex on the sleeping boy. It's true 
that her breasts were tiny; but breasts are not the sole measure of 
maturity. I was convinced her vagina was ready for a penis and that once she 
started having vaginal sex she'd be a great asset to our group. She wanted 
to attend a nude dance party, but she was only 11 and that's really too 
young for a party where most of the kids are over 13 and are having 
sophisticated, confident sex. I don't think it's a good place for a 
defloration if the girl is under 13. But Terrific Girl didn't want the 
formality of a defloration party: I think it was, in fact, because she 
wanted the option to change her mind at the last minute. So we planned a 
pool party for her, and this gave her lots of time beforehand to start a 
course of oral contraceptives. We didn't present it to others as a 
defloration event, and she could indeed change her mind on the day, with 
only one disappointed boy to account to.

The 10% age rule meant that there were few eligible boys for her to have sex 
with. We fixed her up with the cute and shy 12-1/2-year-old brother of a 
friend of mine. Like many of the kids who would hang around Mom's Friend's 
House during their teen years, he had been brought over to play by an ex CoG 
mother from the time he was a toddler. But, perhaps embarrassed (although he 
shouldn't have been) by the undeveloped state of his penis at age 10 and 11, 
he stopped coming. Now his sister brought him back with the promise of fun; 
she thought that now that he had pubic hair, even if his penis was only 
half-grown he should be making love. And she wanted to be there for his 
first time, to watch his penis become erect, see it enter his girl, 
celebrate his ejaculation.

(It was not uncommon for kids to resist visiting once they reached the age 
of, say, 10 and until they showed signs of puberty and either their mother 
pressed them to return or they began taking an interest in things sexual. I 
think that without encouragement, many wouldn't come until their genitals 
reached adult size. The expectation of sex, though, and peer pressure did 
bring them around by age 12 or so. Some of those kids might also resist 
participating in family nudity -- another reason why making body part 
measurement and collective nude photos an inescapable part of regular family 
life is a good thing. Parents need to know how their children are developing 
sexually so they can provide advice, introductions and opportunities. Often 
a kid will not yet feel ready for sex, but almost every kid has renewed 
curiosity about it by the time of his or first pubic hair. No amount of 
maternal haranguing can accomplish what a few weekends among sexually-aware 
peers would do, and that's why Mom's Friend's annual summer camp sessions 
were so popular.

(Mom's Friend, like Moses David, thought it important for toddlers and young 
children to be exposed to the romance, passion and lovemaking of teens and 
adults. But Mom's Friend, unlike Moses David, did not want them engaging in 
physical sex. It may occasionally have happened that immature kids would, in 
fact, try oral sex or even try to fit an immature penis into an immature 
vagina. But such instances were rare and must have happened in the absence 
of a responsible adult or teen. One girl told me that she'd experimented 
with oral sex with a boy when the two of them were only 10; but that hadn't 
been at Mom's Friend's House and in her particular case I didn't know 
whether to believe her or not. Kids that age would gawk and titter; but 
those pre-teens who lived with us or who visited pretty much kept to 
themselves and engaged in innocent play like any other naturist kid -- 
ignoring the adolescents playing a different game for different stakes. (I 
thought it interesting that pre-pubescent girls and boys would ignore a 
boy's involuntary erection; I wondered if less knowledgeable little girls 
would be so nonchalant about infantile erections.) For what it's worth, the 
earliest that any girl I know had sex was 11-1/2, and the earliest any boy 
did was 12, or very close to it. Most deflorations would be at the age of 
13, give or take a few months. By that age most any girl is developed enough 
and wise enough to deal with a penis and sexually attractive enough to 
provoke erections. And by that age most boys will have a penis of 5 to 6 
inches, quite capable of satisfying her after oral foreplay. 
http://www.coolnurse.com/penis_size.htm )

You can tell when a boy is inexperienced and embarrassed by his 
inexperience, or his diminutive penis, just by the hesitant way he 
undresses. And then by the way he shields his penis and what he stares at 
and how he avoids eye contact. His sister was totally nude but he still had 
nylon briefs on -- actually they looked much like bathing trunks -- when I 
brought Terrific Girl over to him. He was shorter than she, and all 
smooth-faced. We could see the outline of his penis through his underpants. 
By now, Terrific Girl was gazing at them, and the boy's sister was getting 
impatient. She walked up behind him and just pulled down his pants and threw 
them aside. He was startled at first, then came to terms with his nudity and 
the critical stares of the girls. We could see his penis in the flesh, and 
it looked really nice. Terrific Girl was smiling in anticipation and touched 
him by way of encouragement. I knew right away that the penis would be 
sufficient once erect to pierce her hymen and, if the boy prepared her 
orally first, to satisfy her. Here's how I described the occasion a couple 
of years ago:

"Soon the boy was fondling The Terrific Girl's diminutive breasts and making 
her smile; then he had one hand at her vagina. They were kissing 
passionately. The Terrific Girl showed her approval by grasping and stroking 
her boy's stiff penis. The Older Girl had suggested that she start with oral 
sex -- either for its own sake or to make vaginal entry easier and perhaps 
painless. She had said, correctly, that oral sex avoids some of the stress 
of the first physical relationship. Brought up to think of sex as wholesome 
and sex parts as beautiful, we were all spared the trauma of those who have 
to overcome an indoctrinated repellence or a presumption of dirtiness. 
Anyhow, whether because he had been told in advance to do it, or because 
Terrific Girl guided his head there, or as a spontaneous act of his own her 
boy had slid Terrific Girl's hips a bit down the chair and his mouth was 
over her vagina, kissing and wetting it. Terrific Girl was running her 
fingers through his hair as she felt the wondrous sensations his tongue was 
causing; every so often he would look up at her. She gazed lovingly at him. 
Her experience was clearly better than mine that day. Her boy moved his body 
upwards to release his big-small penis from its confinement. He took a sip 
of sangria. When he rose from the chair Terrific Girl could better see his 
state of excitement, his penis standing straight up, straining, pulsating. 
She leaned over and grasped it, ran her hand around his testicles, looked 
him in the eye. Then, wordlessly, she put her mouth to the penis, kissed it 
and ran her tongue over its tip, licked it and moistened the glans with her 
lips. She looked at him in the face again and nodded: she was ready. She lay 
back, and as she did so she pulled the boy up by his armpits, positioning 
him exactly so his penis met her vagina. Her legs were wide apart her calves 
bent over the edges of the chair. Very wet and dilated, her vagina, if still 
less than mature was very ready for that penis to enter it. She guided it on 
its way. The Terrific Girl was panting and expectant; her face showed love 
and anticipation. Then the penis was inside her, her hymen had given way and 
the two youngsters were having sex. If there had been any pain, The Terrific 
Girl did not show it. She wanted to get on with it. She lay her hands on the 
boy's buttocks as he rode her, up and down, in and out. She smiled, almost 
laughed, gazing in the boy's eyes. She kissed him passionately. She moved 
her hands to his penis, grasped his testicles and held them as the boy 
continued his movement. The boy ejaculated and I could see semen seeping out 
of The Terrific Girl's vagina; but he did not stop his thrusts yet. He 
waited until The Terrific Girl signed deeply and signaled that she had had 
enough. Later she said that she'd had a rush of pleasure and wasn't entirely 
sure whether it was an orgasm or not, but she'd loved it." 
http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/38098

I doubt whether the boy could have produced very much semen at that stage of 
his development. But it's actually best for an 11- or 12-year old girl when 
she hasn't got to deal with too much semen dripping from her vagina or -- 
especially -- slurping around in her mouth while she builds up the 
confidence and commitment to swallow it. I told that boy later, as I told 
every boy who seemed dissatisfied with the state of his growing penis, that 
he should discuss it with his mother, and that he should measure it 
regularly and keep a chart for all to see. This would be 
confidence-building. I also told such boys that if they could give a girl to 
orgasm and some semen nothing else much mattered. I would tell boys that 
mothers, even more than fathers, are well positioned to advise on these 
things. The most well-adjusted boys I've known have been those who've been 
free to discuss such worries with a mother or older sister. Especially the 
ones who practice family nudity, so the mother or sister is familiar with 
his body and his state of penile development and, perhaps, have seen him 
with erections, especially in the morning. Some boys took my advice; a few 
actually posted charts in their room. Later, when I came upon parents who 
took regular nude family photos and, sometimes, penis (or, less 
contentiously, breast and hip) measurements I realized that it makes a lot 
of sense. Most people can't remember their puberty, but their parents can -- 
if they are allowed to see it happening. And so can the girl who's 
celebrated it with a coming-out party, one commemorating not her calendar 
age but her physical and emotional readiness for penis in vagina.

(I am always struck by the narrow frontier between "appropriate" and 
"inappropriate", even unlawful, parenting in matters of sex. Today, and 
probably when we had them too, a defloration party could lead to prosecution 
if a mother is there. In many or most states though, a bunch of 12- or 
13-year-olds paired off and having sex in a room with the door closed and 
the mother able plausibly to deny any knowledge would lead to nothing 
harsher than a lecture on birth control and STDs. As for prosecutions for 
parents having sex in the presence of their children, they are exceedingly 
rare, and usually undertaken out of spite by some ham-fisted, Bible-confused 
prosecutor. Lawrence v. Texas comes to mind: 
http://www.justia.us/us/539/558/index.html )

I could recount the events of Terrific Girl's defloration in detail because 
my own sex at that party was less than satisfactory and beginning midway 
through the process I started ignoring the boy with his penis inside me and 
started watching Terrific Girl. I saw that her boy had manfully taken to the 
task and that, by dint of having closely watched the rest of playing with 
penises in the past, Terrific Girl knew what to do and when to do it. 
Starting by having the penis dance on the end of her tongue, then closing 
her lips tightly around its tip. The nice thing was that her boy's erection 
had started spontaneously even before she touched the penis and so neither 
boy nor girl had to worry about failure. His scrotum was all scrunched up 
and almost out of sight, but that's normal at a pool party even if it leaves 
less to play with. She kept taking the penis out of her mouth to stare at as 
if she couldn't believe her good fortune. As she told me later, she wanted 
us to see that she was every bit as capable as we were of satisfying a boy, 
and she felt she needed to catch up on all the orgasms she'd missed and all 
those she'd only experienced vicariously, watching us at sex play.

She was right, of course: watching another girl play with a penis is not the 
same as holding one in your hand. That, indeed, is why pornography and 
onanism are so pitiful. This wasn't the first penis that Terrific Girl had 
played with, and that was an advantage. She could take her time, and she 
could lengthen the moment and tease the boy. She licked and licked his penis 
to the point where I worried he might come to soon: you could see that 
distant vision on his face, watching for his orgasm to "come around the 
mountain"; you could see that his eyes were unfocused even though they were 
pointing at Terrific Girl's tongue and his penis. The whole process of the 
penis at her mouth being made ready to deflower her probably lasted less 
than two minutes, but Terrific Girl always does have a purposefulness about 
her, and every boy she makes love to is led to think that she is his alone 
now and forever even though he has to be aware that tomorrow she may have 
his best friends' penis in her mouth -- and that it almost certainly won't 
be his penis because she'll have fobbed him off on another girl, and then 
another, until someday she wants to have sex with him again. Boys who chose 
to put up with us had to accept that they are disposable: they are part of 
our crowd, and their penises belong to us; but they cannot own us or lay 
claim to any particular girl on any particular day unless she agrees. Or, in 
fact, initiates the action. In either case, faithfulness is for that day 
only.

Anyway, with the penis having come inside her and Terrific Girl touching, 
feeling and then tasting the semen at her vagina, her puberty was complete. 
She had joined us as a woman, and we loved her for it. She could walk about 
more confidently, her breasts growing day by day and more and more boys 
coming within her circle of friends. Boys were now free to take her 
seriously, to enjoy the sight of her body, and to approach her to see if she 
was receptive, or not. She was in play. A boy could have an erection in her 
presence, smile shyly, be taken seriously, and perhaps be allowed to put his 
mouth and penis to her vagina. Terrific Girl became, rather quickly, 
Heartbreak Girl: not only would boys, even virgin boys, gladly perform 
cunnilingus for her on command, but having ejaculated in her mouth or in her 
vagina, or both, they would -- contrary to every rule in our book -- get 
possessive and want to take title to her, or at least to be with her again. 
This she would not allow: I don't think she ever had sex with any boy twice 
in the same month during her teen years. This didn't stop boys from trying, 
nor stop them from offering her lavish presents.

When Terrific Girl's dad (Mom's Friend's partner) came back from the 
business trip he was on, he was surprised by how his little girl had grown 
up. I think he realized what had happened even without being told: he came 
in to the back yard still dressed for a business trip, and there was his 
nude daughter with a new confidence, rushing over to kiss him, boy in tow. 
To help him celebrate, we had a barbecue. Mom and Mom's Friend, both nude 
under their barbecue aprons, presided. Their respective partners -- Mom's 
boyfriend of the moment and Terrific Girl's father -- helped out. This meant 
that instead of manning the barbecues they would be moving about among the 
nude girls and boys and adults. Mom and Mom's Friend, pranksters in this 
sort of thing, would play with their penises from time to time, forcing them 
to go around serving drinks with their penises still erect and setting the 
atmosphere for what was to come. A middle-aged penis is scarcely sexy to a 
teen-aged girl, but this was meant as a fun symbol, to provoke giggles, not 
arousal, and also to prove that sex is not just for the young. This erection 
had a totally different connotation and association from that of the Rev. X 
at that other gathering.

After lunch, as if on cue, the kids formed a circle and Terrific Girl and a 
boy we'd chosen for her marched to its center. Because of the Age Rule, he 
had to be within 10% of her age, and he was just 13, But his penis was 
really nice: longish but not too fat, so it would fit nicely inside her. 
Actually, you couldn't tell how long it would be unless it was erect; as I 
saw later it was one of those penises that shrink quite a lot. The boy had 
already been walking about with an erection for some time, inviting glances 
because it was practically vertical and when it would start to wilt, he 
would rub it just enough to restore it to stiffness as if he were fearful 
that if it went away he couldn't recover it. It was totally smooth and, 
indeed, he still had very little pubic hair and what he did have was thin 
and light in color. Because his balls were scrunched up, there was just this 
big round fixture beneath. Now he stood there, his shoulders tilted back, 
waiting for Terrific Girl to make the first move. In another context I would 
have called that arrogant, but he was just awaiting directions on how to 
proceed. Terrific Girl knelt down and took his penis in her mouth and gave 
it just a half-minute of kissing and loving before lying down with a couple 
of cushions under her buttocks and her legs wide apart, and stretching out 
her arm to her boy. He moved on top of her, put his penis over her mouth and 
his mouth over her vagina and proceeded gently to coax her vagina to arousal 
and dilation. From time to time he would move his head up so we could see 
his progress. Terrific Girl was sucking on his penis and pressing against 
its tip with her lips while encouraging up-and-down motions of his hips. In 
that position, she her body looked even younger than she was, but her 
movements were very mature and it was obvious that she was enjoying the body 
contact and that his penis and his tongue were making her very happy. I saw, 
though, change her cadence from time to time and, indeed, stop massaging the 
penis for several seconds, presumably this was to delay his ejaculation. I 
thought she had technique beyond her years, and surmised that it was due to 
her having spent so much time with me and my friends while we did those same 
things, things I categorize as "style" and "class".

After a while and without warning, Terrific Girl began to shriek in ecstasy. 
Her boy spontaneously moved around, his penis waving in the air, until his 
face was at hers and his penis was at her vagina. He fumbled his legs a bit, 
put his lips to hers, and she grasped his penis to guide it home, then 
braced her legs around his. It was lovely to see the head of his penis pass 
into her vagina; gratifying to see how snugly it fit. Her father happened to 
have a good line of sight and I saw his hips and erect penis moving in 
response, and wondered if that was proper fatherly conduct. (I remember now 
something called "genetic attraction" which causes siblings and even parents 
to be sexually attracted to each other when they've been apart for years. I 
wonder if that was happening then. We have always been cautious about the 
presence of unrelated adult men during our sex parties; this is just a 
matter of biology and of avoiding potential problems.) Meanwhile, the 
innocent expression on Terrific Girl's cherubic young face made this just 
like a coming-out party. She looked as she had looked days before: like a 
girl glad at last to be rid of her hymen. It was a reprise of the pool party 
-- a reprise that told me Terrific Girl was a great actress. In fact, after 
her boy dismounted she didn't want to move from where she was until the 
audience tired of admiring her wet vagina. Her father meanwhile couldn't 
keep his hands away from his penis. Mom's Friend's finally took his hand and 
put it to her breasts, then her vagina. My Mom whispered some words to the 
two of them and then to the great surprise of all of us -- because parents 
never had done this before -- Mom's Friend and Terrific Girl's dad crossed 
over into the center of the circle and lay down, her man underneath and 
Mom's Friend on top. Older Girl and Terrific Girl joined the circle 
celebrating the middle-aged couple's fun. It is no secret that when you have 
just had an orgasm you want to see everyone around you enjoy one too: that's 
indeed the essence of our faith. The best orgasm ever is the one you just 
had; you want, naturally, to share your bliss with family and friends by 
sexually arousing them.

For the first time, our adults were making themselves the focus of attention 
during their sex rather than making love discreetly, within our view but off 
in the shadows. Mom's Friend's mouth was over her partner's middle-aged 
penis and she was moving her head rapidly up and down. Terrific Girl's Dad 
had his tongue in her vagina, and then all of her sex parts were in her 
mouth. The beauty of vagina and penis is totally independent of age. It was 
so lovely to see, close up, Mom's Friend's clitoris and vagina being kissed 
and pleasured. Much of the time we couldn't actually see much of what was 
happening: like a duck's feet paddling rapidly out of sight, a man whose 
mouth covers a woman's vagina hides the activity of his tongue. We did get a 
good view of his penis, though, because Mom's Friend knew exactly how to 
manipulate it with her hand and mouth so that we could follow the action, 
showing off the glans and, by adjusting her cadence, suggesting her man's 
proximity to orgasm. I could see that unlike our young-girl teasing and 
carrying on, she was stimulating his penis with no nonsense and at a steady, 
rapid cadence that meant he would ejaculate soon. She obviously didn't care 
about trying to synchronize her own orgasm to his. Even so her timing was a 
bit off and I think his ejaculation came sooner than she expected. A splash 
of semen suddenly cascaded out of her mouth, down his penis and over his 
balls and down onto the beach towel. Mom's Friend must have been embarrassed 
that she had let so much escape because right away she lapped up all that 
she could and ostentatiously swallowed it. Her vagina was still held captive 
in her partner's mouth, but that mouth was scarcely moving, immobilized by 
the anticipation of orgasm.

Now Mom's Friend turned over on her back and her partner knelt between her 
legs with his face pushed against her crotch and his tongue worked furiously 
inside the crack of her vulva until at last she smiled broadly, sighed 
deeply, and threw her arms aside. Her breasts had flattened against her 
body; only her nipples were erect. She breathed heavily, then looked towards 
her partner, at his tongue now licking his lips as if to capture the last 
traces of vaginal fluids, and at his soft penis and she sighed again. I 
supposed that last sigh was because she had determined he wasn't up to 
putting his penis into her vagina. That was a pity, because it brings a 
beautiful sense of completion to lovemaking when a man ejaculates both in 
his partner's mouth and in her vagina. But Terrific Girl's dad just sat by 
her and stroked Mom's Friend's hair; she leaned her head over and kissed and 
licked his penis. And the rest of us went about our business, reassured that 
sexual pleasure does not diminish with age and all that Mom's Friend had 
taught us about sex as a keystone of religious belief is right and proper.

I had a strong feeling of solidarity with Mom at that point. I wanted to be 
close to her, and for us to climax next to each other and at the same time. 
It was nice lying near her, our respective partners kissing our vaginas and 
giving us pleasure. And it was nice, afterwards, playing with their penises 
in tandem and receiving semen as a blessing. Every so often we'd look over 
at what the other was doing, and smile. Not the guilty smile of the mother 
or the daughter caught in flagrante delicto with her boyfriend, but the 
knowing and confident and approving smile of a loved one. We had enjoyed sex 
together before, and to this day I think it represents some of our best 
mother-daughter moments. The recognition that you have both, in each other's 
presence, enjoyed a climax, received semen and felt God is incomparable. 
These are the fondest memories that we share and that we still talk about 
together. (It's not the same with fathers and sons, something I know from 
experience but will save for another day's tale.) I wonder how many other 
girls have that experience and whether, in the fake New Morality that the 
social engineers of America are promoting and legislating, future 
generations of girls can experience it. Most of all, I wonder how many girls 
and boys share with their mothers the confidence and trust that I share with 
Mom. And how many, as a result, get, and can give to others, the best that 
life has to offer.

Notwithstanding she had grown up in surroundings of liberal sexuality, 
Terrific Girl found, as we all do, that the loss of her hymen was a 
life-changing experience. Overnight, she ceased to be just a voyeuse and now 
would be in daily physical contact with boys -- with all the emotional and 
tactical changes that implied. She still had lots to learn, but she also had 
lots to teach us, both boys and girls. The first thing she wanted to know 
was whether a girl could identify a boy just from his penis. To find this 
out, she organized a contest. Six girls, including me, and six boys were 
recruited and the girls were blindfolded. We then had to try to figure out 
the identity of the boy who would put his penis in our mouth. We were 
allowed to play with our boy's penis and testicles, and we could take as 
much time as we wanted pondering the taste and smell of his semen once he'd 
ejaculated into our mouth. There were no other hints other than, of course, 
knowing the identities of the six boys.

We sat on six folding chair and Terrific Girl put the blindfolds on us. I 
could hear whispering but couldn't make out anything being said other than 
by Terrific Girl as she went from chair to chair telling each girl in 
sequence to open her mouth for a penis. I heard a bit of slurping and 
grunting, and then she was at my side, telling me to open my mouth for my 
boy to put his penis in, which I did.

The penis in my mouth was not big or long -- certainly not long enough to go 
way down my throat and gag me -- but not too small either, and it was very 
smooth. I guessed the boy was 12 or 13, although that would have made him 
too young for me under the 10% rule. I ran my tongue over and over its head, 
and my hand around my boy's balls. I pressed my lips against the tip, trying 
to discern its shape and maybe provoke some seminal fluid to emerge. There 
seemed to be no hair at all, which convinced me that my boy was quite young. 
His erection was very strong; when his penis slipped out of my mouth at one 
point it snapped up against his body, and in grasping it to put it back in 
my mouth I notice my boy had little or no body hair. On the other hand, when 
at last he ejaculated, he did so with sophistication, with panache I 
thought, yielding the maximum number of spurts and hence the maximum 
pleasure for himself. And there was more than a teaspoonful of semen, which 
suggested a certain physical maturity of the prostate. I always had thought 
I could tell a boy by his semen, but this time I was stumped. The image in 
my mind didn't resemble any of the six. So I made an educated guess from 
among the younger boys of the six.

I was wrong. So were all the other girls except one. And because she was a 
newcomer who'd only had sex with her boy once before, I'm convinced she just 
made a lucky guess. My boy was 14 and I must have had his penis in my mouth 
two dozen times before, including once at a nude dance party. I just 
couldn't identify it by feel and taste alone.

So much for trying to identify a boy by his penis.


Love,
Carol

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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