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NNTP-Posting-Date: Sat, 23 Oct 2004 21:54:53 -0500
From: hungry@stoolmail.zzn.com (Hungry)
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Subject: {ASSM} {ASS} BIG MUTHA TRUCKERS (Hungry Guy) {MF BF WM COBOL CDL interr true slow oral cons rom}
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Date: Sun, 24 Oct 2004 02:10:05 -0400
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{ASS} BIG MUTHA TRUCKERS (Hungry Guy) {MF BF WM COBOL CDL interr true 
slow oral cons rom}   
BY:  Hungry Guy (hungry@stoolmail.zzn.com)

Author's Notes:  Truth is stranger that fiction!  This story is based 
on the less-than-illustrious career of a friend of mine who, like me, 
has been a computer programmer his whole life.  And like me, he's 
also an aspiring writer, though as far as I know he's never written 
any pr0n.  For various reasons, he isn't at liberty to write about 
some of these events, but I have no such restrictions.  I also wish 
to thank him for giving me examples of mainframe code and 
terminology.  Up until the moment when Einreb meets Tamila, all the 
events depicted in this story are absolutely, positively, 100% true!  
The names of individual people have been changed to protect the 
guilty, but the locations and company names have been kept true. 

Operators of erotic story web sites, whether free or fee-based, have 
my permission to post my stories for public reading, provided that 
credit is given to "Hungry Guy" (hungry@stoolmail.zzn.com) as the 
author, and as long as you don't make changes other than fixing 
typos.  Even beware of fixing typos, for I occasionally use local 
slang and dialects that may be flagged by your spell checker.  
Thanks.

My stories can be found on: 
http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/HungryGuy/www.
http://storiesonline.net/library/author.php?name=Hungry_Guy
http://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=171541

    #### 

    Einreb parked his little yellow Beetle in front of Troll 
Associates' Lethbridge building in Mahwah and made his way to his 
cubicle, as he had done nearly every workday for the past 10 years.  

    "Morning Yrral!" Einreb said as he passed Yrral Allemoc's cube at 
10 to 9 on a Monday morning.  

    "Morning Einreb!" Yrral called back.

    "Where's Gerg?" Einreb asked. 

    "I don't know; he's going to be late in a minute," the boss said. 

    Sure enough, the receptionist then announced over the PA system, 
"Attention please!  The time is now nine o'clock!"

    Einreb poked his head into Yrral's cube, "Didn't Gerg say he was 
going to a Grateful Dead concert over the weekend?"

    "Yeah, I think so," Yrral answered. 

    "Ah!  He must be out buying a new car again." 

    "Mmm," the boss muttered.

    Einreb stopped over at Tnecillim's cube.  "Hi Tneci!  You got the 
wall textures for Monster Maze for me?"     

    "Yup!  Here!"  She answered and handed him a floppy diskette. 

    Einreb booted up his computer and began to merge the artist's 
graphics with his assembler code when Evets popped into Einreb's 
cube, handing Einreb a floppy disk.  "Here's the background midi for 
the boss fight."  

    "Thanks, Evets!" Einreb said as Gerg wandered in. 

    "Morning everyone!" Gerg said.

    "Morning Gerg," Yrral answered.  "What happened?"

    "Sorry I'm late.  I, er, had an accident this weekend." 

    "Hey Gerg!" Einreb called out.  "That's three-for-three now.  
Three Dead concerts and three wrecked cars in the past year.  Maybe 
there's a pattern there you can do something about..."  
   
    "Shut up!" Gerg sneered back. 
 
    Einreb loved his job as a computer game programmer for Troll.  
Sometimes he longed to work for a company that people actually heard 
of, like Atari or Activision, who made games for the Atari 2600 that 
people actually wanted to buy.  Still, he counted himself lucky to 
have been recruited by Troll before he even graduated from Orange 
County Community College 10 years ago.  Though graduating with Honors 
and on the Dean's list didn't hurt either.  

    That the receptionist announced the start of work, breaks, lunch, 
and end of day, was a joke among the professional staff.  Still, it 
was a great working environment.  Most of the times, it was very 
laid-back.  Though things heated up as year-end ship-dates 
approached.  Still, writing computer games for a living sure beat 
cranking out business reports and statistical analysis that was the 
norm of most programmers.  Headhunters often called him nearly every 
night trying to lure him into taking a higher-paying mainframe COBOL 
job at UPS, A&P, or BMW.  He always politely refused.  "COBOL?  Ugh!"  

    He and Yrral often played Flight Simulator in linked mode during 
lunch hour together.  And it was a running joke how Gerg Xeurt 
_always_ wrecked his cars coming home from Grateful Dead concerts.  

    Being a young group, the guys often invited each other to their 
bachelor pads for parties.  

    Evets had invited the group to his house one Friday night after 
work for a little party.  Einreb, Yrral, Gerg, Mit, Ycnan, and 
Tnecillim were all sitting around Evets' coffee table one Friday 
night after work as Evets came out of his bedroom and lit a joint. 

    When Einreb's turn came around he said, "No thanks."

    "What?  You don't party?" Gerg asked in shock. 

    "I don't.  But it's okay; I'm a Libertarian!  I've no problem 
with what other people do for fun.  But I don't do drugs, myself."  

    "Oh, come on!  One joint isn't going to hurt!" Evets insisted. 

    "You guys enjoy!  Don't mind me!" Einreb replied. 

    As it was, the party ended early and Einreb headed home in his 
yellow bug.

    Autumn was well under way when Yrral was promoted to marketing 
Analyst, and Gerg was promoted to manage the game development group.  
 
    The drop-dead ship date was 24 hours away and Einreb still hadn't 
fixed that bug that the testers had found that caused the boss 
monster to run around in circles when he was down to 1 hit point.  

    The receptionist announced five o'clock over the PA system on 
Wednesday evening, but Einreb stayed at his desk.  Within five 
minutes, the building was completely empty.  

    Einreb continued to run compiles and tests.  "Damn!"  

    5:00 PM quickly ran into 6:00 AM when Einreb finally got the game 
done.  

    Rather than drive home and then drive back to work again in a few 
hours, Einreb curled up on the floor under his desk and fell asleep.   

    When Gerg came to Einreb's cubicle at 4:45 on the following 
Friday, Einreb had a bad feeling.  Whenever someone got fired from 
Troll, it was _always_ at 4:45 on a Friday.   

    "Einrneb," Gerg started.

    "What, Gerg?"

    "I'm sorry to tell you, but we had a meeting with Yrral and got 
approval from Mr. and Mrs. Retcehcs, and have decided that we no 
longer need your services."

    "What!" Einreb said.  "After I just put in a 32 hour day to get 
that game done!"

"That has nothing to do with it."

    "You're damn right about that, Gerg!  It's because I won't smoke 
drugs with you!"

    "Clean out your desk and come with me, Einreb!" 

    ### 

    "I didn't do it!" Einreb pounded on the table in the 
interrogation room at the Piscataway police station.   

    "We have several witnesses who overheard you make a terrorist 
threat this morning," Detective Llemtrac sneered back. 

    "It wasn't like that!  We all knew that AT&T was handing out the 
layoff notices this morning, and we were all making jokes about it; 
you know, gallows humor.  No one was making any terrorist threats!"

    "But you did mention a bomb." 
 
    "Well, yes.  But they tricked me!  I didn't realize they were 
steering the conversation to trick me into using the 'b' word until 
the police showed up at my house!  I was so close to saving the 
princess in Super Mario World, too!"    

    "Why would they do that to you?" 

    "I explained that to you already!" Einreb said through clenched 
teeth.  "It's all because of the hazing!  I told you that after I 
complained about the Birthday Beatings to Dref..."
 
    "Who?" the detective demanded.

    "Dnanidref.  He's the manager of another development group in the 
department.  I never worked under him, but we were sort of friends.  
I had asked him to see if he could do something about the Birthday 
Beatings."

    "Why didn't you ask your own manager?" 
 
    "Mij Htims?  He was in on the hazing as must as the rest of the 
bunch!  They all said they were going to get back at me for asking 
Dref for help..."    
    The detective leaned forward and stared into Einreb's eyes.  "If 
you're making accusations at your manager to get out of this, you're 
gonna be in even bigger trouble!" 
 
    "Then give me a lie detector test, that'll prove I'm telling the 
truth!" 
 
    The detective ignored Einreb's plea and pressed on.  "Were you 
ever in the military?" 

    "No." 

    "Do you own any guns?"

    The detective grilled Einreb on and on and finally left him alone 
in the interrogation room for another half hour, then drove him back 
to the AT&T building and turned him over to corporate security.

    Lien Tnaf and Adnil Regnettip, the executive management team of 
the division, were there and slowly read the report handed to him by 
the detective.  "Do you know evacuating the building this morning 
cost AT&T over $100,000?"

    "You're blaming _me_ for _your_ paranoia!"_ Einreb asked the 
suit.  "You made the decision to evacuate the building, not me!"  
 
    "You're suspended until further notice," is all he said in reply.  

    "I gave five years of my life to AT&T, Lien!  I deserve better 
treatment than this!" 

    The suit turned his back and left, and corporate security 
escorted Einreb out.  
 
    Einreb cried all through the night.  Six bottles worth of Nytol 
pills sat, uneaten, in a big pile on his night table.  He didn't even 
get a chance to say "goodbye" to Airam.  Being a shy loner, she was 
the closest he had to a best friend, whom he went out to lunch with 
once a week or so.  Had she not been married, he often wondered if 
their friendship could have turned into something more... 

    Eventually, though, things improved.  His suspension ended and he 
returned to work at AT&T, but assigned to a different department.  
Most of the people he had known before had been laid off that fateful 
day.  "Good riddance!" he thought of most of them -- though he never 
got up the courage to call Airam back again, nor did she ever call 
him.   

    Einreb, however, didn't make it through the next round of layoffs 
that AT&T held five years later.  Largely, he suspected, because of 
the lawsuit he had brought against AT&T for the Birthday Beating 
hazing and for his false arrest.  

    ### 

    (Hey!  This is supposed to be a sex story!  So where's the 
frigging sex?)
    (Just hold on!  It's coming!)

    #### 

    After being unemployed for nearly a year, and beating Metal Gear 
Solid, and Final Fantasy VII and VIII, Einreb had found a clerical 
job at Guardian Life through Kelly Services.  

    A few weeks earlier, Knarf Ollurec, the department head, offered 
him the job immediately at the conclusion of the interview, and he 
accepted it.  The two-hour commute to Bethlehem was horrendous, but 
at least he was doing a reverse commute from Piscataway to 
Pennsylvania along I-78.  The traffic in the opposite direction 
crawled toward New York in the morning, and crawled back toward 
Pennsylvania in the evening, but for Einreb traffic was light except 
for the occasional big rig pulling out of the truck stops that lined 
the expressway.    

    Einreb parked his big white Cadillac DeVille behind the Guardian 
building and headed toward the employee entrance.  It was a 
relatively stress-free clerical job, although it barely paid above 
minimum wage.   

    "Hey" Nairb called out as their paths converged toward the 
entrance of the office, "Nice car!  How's a clerk afford a Cadillac?" 

    As part of the settlement agreement, Einreb isn't allowed to talk 
about his settlement with AT&T (but Einreb's friends are :-), so he 
just told a different truth, "I got a good severance package from 
AT&T." 

    Once inside, Einreb and Nairb went their separate directions as 
Einreb settled into his cubicle for the day. 
 
    "Hey Einreb!" Naoj called out from the cubicle across the aisle. 
 
    "What's up?" Einreb asked.
 
    "How do I find special characters in SPF edit again?" 
 
    "Type _F P'.'_ ." 
 
    "Thanks!"
 
    "No problem."

    At work, the programmers around him had discovered that his 10 
years of mainframe programming experience at AT&T, and 20 years 
programming overall, came in handy when they needed to know some 
esoteric detail about ISPF, COBOL, PL/1, JCL, VSAM, DB/2 or CICS.
 
    "Hey Einreb!" Rehtse asked while leaning over the cubicle wall 
from her cubicle adjacent to his.  
 
    "What's up, Rehtse?"
 
    "Do you know an easy way to insert sequence numbers into a flat 
file?"
 
    "Sure, you can do that with ISPF.  Just edit the file, turn 
number mode on, then turn it off again."    
 
    "I already tried that.  The file is too big for SPF, and I don't 
want COBOL numbering."
 
    "You could always use Syncsort."    
 
    "Syncsort?  You can't put sequence numbers in a file with 
Syncsort!"    
 
    "Sure you can!  I've done it plenty of times to build test data."
 
    "Then why isn't it in Quick-ref?"  
 
    "It's in Quickref, but Quickref doesn't explain clearly how to do 
it."  
 
    "You're pulling my leg, Einreb." 
 
    As a clerk, Einreb didn't have a TSO ID.  "Let me sit at your 
terminal for a moment, and I'll show you how."   
 
    "I don't really have time for this, Einreb," Rehtse said.  "But 
suit yourself."
 
    Einreb sat at Rehtse's terminal and typed the following JCL into 
a member in her JCLLIB PDS:
     
        //SORT     EXEC PGM=SYNCSORT,REGION=4M          
        //SORTLIB  DD   DSN=SYS1.SORTLIB,DISP=SHR  
        //SYSOUT   DD   SYSOUT=*  
        //SORTIN   DD   * 
        /*   
        //SORTOUT  DD   DSN=REHTSE01.TEST.SORT,   
        //         DISP=(NEW,CATLG,DELETE),  
        //         UNIT=DISK,SPACE=(CYL,(1,1),RLSE),  
        //         DCB=(RECFM=FB,LRECL=15,BLKSIZE=0)  
        //SYSIN    DD   *
         SORT FIELDS=(0001,010,CH,A)                
         OUTREC FIELDS=(SEQNUM,5,ZD,START=8,INCR=3,0001,010)   
        /*

    "There," Einreb said.  "Change the START and INCR values to suit 
your needs, put a JOB card on it, put some test data in SORTIN, print 
the output file with a GENER, and run it."

    Einreb returned to his cube to continue transcribing his minutes 
from this morning's budget meeting into an email to send out to all 
the managers.  

    The rest of Einreb's day was filled by reserving conference rooms 
for upcoming meetings, calling Xerox to request a technician for a 
belligerent copier, and confirming that the cafeteria will serve 
coffee at tomorrow's executive luncheon. 

    Ever since his gall bladder surgery a few years back, when he had 
medical insurance at AT&T, Einreb sometimes has bouts of diarrhea at 
the most inconvenient times.  Taking Imodium helped when he had plans 
to do something on a Saturday afternoon, but he didn't want to be 
dependent on pharmaceuticals to live his day-to-day life.  That 
evening, about a 45 minutes into his commute, nearly half way home, 
Einreb stopped into Truck Stops of America along I-75 to use the 
men's room. 

    After doing what he had to do, he browsed through the small 
truckers' store for a few minutes.  Like a quickie-mart, they sold 
snacks and soda, but they also sold truckers' log books, maps, CB 
radios, mud flaps depicting naked women, and assorted other "truck" 
stuff.  He excused himself past the truckers browsing around, all big 
burly guys whom he wouldn't want to piss off.

    When he arrived home, he was thrilled to have a phone message 
from a recruiter who had found his resume on programmingjobs.com.

    He called the recruiter back and, about 15 minutes later, had 
lined up an interview with Unisys in Trenton the following day for a 
permanent programming job with benefits.  
 
    With his interview suit still freshly pressed, he called in sick, 
headed down Route 1 past the Quakerbridge Mall, and got off north of 
Trenton.     
 
    The HR manager, Nerak Klov, met him in the lobby and showed him 
in to a conference room.  She talked briefly about company benefits 
and such before leaving to bring in the management team who would 
interview him. 
 
    The management team filed in and introduced themselves to Einreb.  
The manager was Nylorac Nesredna, and the other members of the team 
were Ennayd Yksnad, Ekim Sirrom, and Lav Veyilas. 
 
    Nylorac started by asking him what utility he would use to create 
a VSAM file.
 
   "Everyone knows that!" Einreb answered.  "You use IDCAMS."
 
    Nylorac laughed and said, "Not everyone knows that."
 
    The technical questions were pretty basic, but the pressure was 
building during his first shot at a programming job in over a year.   

    "What is the difference between a join and a union?" Ekim asked. 

    Einreb answered, "A join takes two different tables and connects 
them side-by-side, using keys in each of the tables to match up 
corresponding rows, to make one wide table.  An inner join only 
returns rows where keys match on both tables, but an outer join 
returns every row of both tables, even if there's no matching key on 
one table."  He knew his answer was somewhat imprecise and there was 
more to it than that, and he could go on about left and right joins, 
but he didn't want to make a mistake and say something wrong, so he 
left it at that.  Besides, unions and joins are really inefficient 
SQL, and no one hardly ever uses them if they can help it. 

    "And what about a union?" Ekim persisted.

    "A union takes two tables with similar characteristics and stacks 
them to make one long table."  Again, he knew the answer was somewhat 
imprecise.  Most programmers would create a VIEW of the tables and 
create the JOIN or UNION from the VIEW rather than the table itself, 
but anyone who knew DB2 would know what he meant.   

    Ekim continued asking about cursors, DML vs. DDL, SPUFI, DCLGEN, 
and other aspects of DB2 programming.   
 
    Then their focus changed to CICS questions.  His mind froze when 
Ennayd asked him what TRANID he would use to debug a CICS program.  
He knew the answer.  It was on the tip of his tongue.  But all he 
could say was, "Sorry, my mind went blank." 
 
    Still, he knew that he had answered most of the technical 
questions correctly.  
 
    The personality questions came next.  First came the dreaded, "Do 
you prefer to work alone or in a team?" question.
 
    Einreb was a programmer through and through.  Like any self-
respecting techie geek, he loved nothing better than to be given a 
set of requirements, a deadline, and left alone to code.  "I love to 
work with people," he answered.  "I've worked on large teams, and 
I've worked alone.  I work well either way." 
 
    "What was your favorite assignment?"  
 
    That was easy. "The time I was the last remaining programmer on a 
small project as a result of downsizing.  I was assigned to a manager 
who knew little about my project, so I met with my users, did 
software maintenance, ran the daily production cycle, and my desk 
phone was the help line for the system."      
 
    The questioning went on like that for about an hour, then they 
asked him if he had any questions.     
 
    Of course, he wanted to ask them the really important questions, 
like how long the workday was, if they can wear jeans to work, and 
how many vacation days they got a year.  But he knew better.  "What 
challenges will I face on this assignment?" and "Have you done a risk 
analysis for the work, and what contingencies have you identified?" 
 
    The interview finally ended and they thanked each other for their 
time. 
 
    Einreb started his car and his eyes suddenly brightened.  He 
rolled down his window and yelled out, "CEDF!" as if the people on 
the 4th floor of the distant office building could hear, while 
drawing curious stares from passers-by on the sidewalk. 
 
    Upon returning home, he made a few changes to the thank-you 
letters he had already saved in his PC, printed them out, and dropped 
them in the mail.  
 
    Upon arriving at work the following day, Noaj called over to 
Einreb from her cube.  "Hey Einreb, can you come over for a second?" 
 
    Thankful to take a break from figuring how many bagels he needed 
to order from the cafeteria for next week's department status 
meeting, Einreb across the aisle.  "What's up, Noaj?"

    "My TSO session's locked up recalling an HSM'd dataset!  Ever 
since Desktop Services re-imaged my PC to XP last month, I lost my 
PA2 key!  They say you're good at this PC stuff too.  Do you know how 
to get my PA2 key back?"

    "I'll try.  Let me have a seat," Einreb said.

    Einreb had never used _IBM Host On Demand_ before, and he 
preferred Rumba, but he knew that these TN3270 emulators all worked 
much the same.  He clicked on EDIT, then PREFERENCES, then KEYBOARD."

    "I tried that," Noaj said,  "I don't see any of the AID keys 
listed."   

Einreb clicked on the drop down menu under CATEGORIES and selected 
HOST FUNCTIONS.  He scrolled down the list until he found PA1 and 
highlighted the row.  He pressed ALT and F1 together, but nothing 
happened.  He rubbed his chin and then clicked on ASSIGN KEY.  Again 
he pressed ALT and F1 together and the key sequence appeared in the 
row for PA1.  He repeated the steps for PA2 and PA3.

    He clicked on APPLY and ended out of the menus back to  Noaj's 
TSO session.  Pressing ALT and F2, he broke out of the HSM wait.   

    "There!  ALT-F1 is your PA1 key, F2 is PA2, and so on." 
 
    "Thanks Einreb!  You're a life saver!"

    "No problem," Einreb answered and went back to counting bagels. 

    ###

    After several days had passed, he sent an email to Nerak Klov 
asking her if they had reached a decision yet.

    Her reply the following day was that they had chosen another 
candidate.

    He replied asking her for some feedback why he was passed over, 
and she replied again saying that he wasn't very strong technically. 

    "Damn!"  Einreb said to his computer.  "I'm as strong as anyone!  
I'm just not a good salesman."

    ### 

    Several weeks passed without any further job leads when Mit 
Nahanahs, his immediate supervisor at Guardian, stopped by his 
cubicle and asked to see him privately.

    Mit spoke in his thick London accent, "Einreb, we've had some 
complaints from the head of maintenance about the bathrooms."

    "What about the bathrooms?" Einreb asked.

    "He says you've left messes in the bathrooms on two occasions."   

     Einreb thought quick.  There had been a few times that his 
diarrhea after an occasional heavy lunch had overwhelmed a toilet in 
the men's room and caused it to overflow.  But remembering advice 
that his lawyer gave him after the settlement of his frame-up by 
AT&T, he knew the best defense against almost any accusation was 
complete denial.  "You've got the wrong guy, Mit.  I don't know 
anything about any messes in the bathrooms!"     

   "You were seen by the security guards on two occasions leaving the 
bathroom.  The cleaning lady complained, and the head of maintenance 
made a big stink to Knarf."

    "But I don't know anything about this!  What does the head of 
maintenance have against me?  What did I ever do to him?"

    "If you were a regular employee, you'd be able to appeal.  But 
since you're a temp, we have no choice but to let you go."

    "What!  You can't be serious, Mit!  Over a toilet overflowing?"

    "I need your badge, Einreb.  Please follow me out of the 
building."

    In addition to heavy eating, stress also triggered his ailment.  
He pulled into the truck stop on his way home early that day.  Einreb 
pondered his predicament while sitting on the throne.  "Could I sue 
Guardian for violating the Americans With Disabilities Act?  I wonder 
if lacking a gall bladder counts as a legal disability.  With my 
luck, I bet it doesn't!  Shit!"  

    On his way out, he stopped at the Burger King counter and ordered 
a burger and fries.   

Making his way to the little dining area, he took a seat and watched 
the big rigs drive in and out of the truck stop through the plate 
glass window while he ate his burger.  "Well," he thought to himself, 
"I have plenty of time to finish playing Halo.  Maybe I'll stop at 
the mall on my way home and pre-order Halo 2." 

    He felt conspicuously out of place sitting among the grubby 
looking guys, presumably all truck drivers.  But he kept to himself 
while he nibbled on his burger.

    "Hi there," a voice came from behind him.

    Looking up from his burger, a tall black woman was standing over 
him carrying a tray.  "Want some company?" she asked.

    "Uhm, sure," Einreb replied, quickly studying the muscular woman 
wearing a gray coverall and heavy black work shoes. 

    Sitting down, she said, "I'm Tamila."

    "Einreb," Einreb said looking into her eyes and guessing that she 
was about his age. 

    She leaned forward and whispered, "You're cute."  

    Einreb gasped, "Really?"  He picked a little trucker slang in the 
handful of times he had browsed through the truckers' store, and 
wondered if she was what they called a lot lizard.

    "Yeah, you're the first guy I seen in here in a long time what's 
got all his teeth," she whispered and laughed. 

    That wasn't totally true, Einreb thought; most of the truckers 
seemed to be reasonably ordinary looking guys.  Though there was also 
more than a few who seemed rather seedy, with a fair share of visibly 
missing teeth.  At that, Einreb took a closer look at her.  She was 
fairly attractive, though not glamorous.  And, yes, she had all her 
teeth, all pearly white.  Her hair was in cornrows on the top, and 
hung down all in braids along the side and back.  "Well, you're 
pretty attractive yourself," Einreb said. 

    "Thanks," she said.  "So what you drive?"

    Einreb leaned back.  "Drive?  Uhm, a Cadillac.  Why?"

    She let out a loud laugh.  "A Cadillac?  That's a good one!"

    "What do you drive?" he asked. 

    "A Volvo," she said with a smile.

    "Oh?"  Einreb remembered considering between the Cadillac, BMW, 
Benz, Volvo, and Lexus, when he bought his Cadillac.  "Volvos are 
really nice."

    "Yup!" She said, "The best!  And I only got 185,000 miles on it."

    "Oh?  So you've had it for quite a few years then!" 

    "Nope!  Bought it brand new last year," she said, beaming with 
pride. 

    "Last year?" Einreb choked back his amazement.

    "Yeah, got an Eaton-Fuller ten-speed and a Cummins 540..." 

    Einreb was never one to trick out his cars, and so had no clue 
what she was talking about.  

    "...and," she reached out and slid her index finger down his hand 
toward his fingers, "a double sleeper condo upstairs." 

    "Oh!" Einreb stammered, finally catching on.

    Finishing their burgers, Einreb was frantically trying to think 
of a way to get out of there without causing a scene.

    "So," she said with a grin, "your truck or mine?"

    Einreb, having no truck, said, "Your Volvo sounds good."

    "Then come on!"  She grabbed his arm and practically pulled him 
through the truck stop, into a hallway in the back, past a lounge 
where truckers were watching a big-screen TV, and out into the 
parking lot in the back, jam-packed with 18-wheelers.   

    She led him to a truck emblazoned with the logo of a gigantic 
woman carrying a truck trailer on her back like Atlas carrying the 
Earth.  The name under the logo said, "Big Mutha Truckers." 

    "Welcome to my home," Tamila said upon entering the cab of the 
truck, whereupon she wrapped her arms around Einreb and slammed her 
mouth against his. 

    Mouth to mouth, Tamila pulled Einreb up into the sleeper berth up 
above in the back of the cab.  A little 9" TV hung down from the 
ceiling facing the head of the bed.

    Einreb didn't know where to begin.  He had never been with such 
an aggressive woman before.  And he had never known many black 
people, let alone had had a black girlfriend.

    "You're shy!" she suddenly said as they fell into the bed 
overlooking the interior of the truck cab.  "That makes me so hot!"

    Before Einreb had a chance to react, she had unzipped her 
coverall down to her navel letting her bulbous breasts wiggle into 
view.  Her nipples had already swollen bigger than he had ever seen 
nipples be.

    "Like 'em?" she asked.

    "Yeah!" Einreb said.  "They do look tasty!"

    "Then what you waiting for?"  She leaned forward pressing him 
onto his back and pressing one of her coal-black nipples tightly down 
against his mouth.

    Einreb sucked the huge nipple in his mouth for all he was worth, 
causing it to swell even bigger.  

    A few moments later, she lifted her muscular chest up and lowered 
the other nipple to his mouth.

    By then, she was laying on top of him.  After he had teased her 
other nipple to swollen proportions she lifted up and said, "So, you 
going to show me what you got, or what?"

    He was already harder than he had ever been in a long time, and 
he hoped she would be impressed, or at least not disappointed.  He 
sat up, pilled off his shirt, kicked his shoes off, unbuckled his 
belt and started to pull his Dockers down.

    "Hurry up already!" she said.  With a laugh, she added, "I got to 
get my load to Detroit by tomorrow!"  

    Einreb pulled his Dockers off, then she grabbed his BVD's and 
finished the job, letting his member spring to attention before her 
eyes. 

    "Ohhhh!" she said with a grin and grabbed his cock.  She stroked 
it a few times, and Einreb felt the pressure building quickly.  In 
another second, he was going to explode into her hand.

    She stopped, and kicked her shoes off, letting fall to the floor 
below, then unzipped her coverall all the way off and tossed it down 
too.     
 
    She swung her naked black body onto his, with her ass over his 
head and her head at his crotch, and settled onto him.  

    He gasped as she pressed her muff against his mouth, squeezing 
his head between her thighs, as she looked up directly into her deep 
dark black ass crack hovering just above his face.  Then he moaned 
when she plunged his cock into her mouth.  She took it all the way 
down her throat and began to suck on it.  Being well primed already, 
he let go, exploding deep into her throat, with spasm after spasm.

    She sucked him dry, then sat up, sitting on his face.  

    "Now you eat me!" she commanded.

    Her soaking pussy was pressing down directly against his mouth 
with the force of the, not inconsequential, full weight of her body.

    He began to lick slowly, then more forcefully.  He wasn't a total 
dweeb, and so knew his way around a woman.  He licked up and down her 
slit, poking his tongue up into her pussy, then down again to flick 
her clit.  

    "Oh!  Just do that!" she moaned.

    He flicked her clit a few more times, then drew it into his 
mouth, sucking on it like a lollypop.  He continued to suck it deeper 
and deeper, while flicking, licking, and teasing it with his tongue.

     "Oh yes!  Oh yes!" she screamed.

    Einreb continued, and was soon rewarded with her quaking madly 
while sitting on his face.

    Einreb was about to pass out from holding his breath when she 
fell forward again.  She lay on him panting for a few moments, then 
crawled around on top of him to lay back on him facing him.

    "God!  You know you're good at that?" 

    "Actually," he admitted, "I've been told by past girlfriends that 
I'm pretty good at giving head."

    "Damn right you are!" 

    Again, she leaned down and began to kiss him once more.  They 
spent a good five minutes swapping spit and wrestling tongues when 
she lifted her torso up and reached up into a compartment over the 
bed.  

    Einreb recognized the little packet as she asked, "Ready for the 
grand finale?  Or do I need to get you hard again?"

    "It's been a while, so I'm hard again right now."

    "So you are," she laughed, squeezing his hard cock between her 
thighs.  "You want to put it on, or me?"

    Einreb smiled.  "You can put it on if you want."

    "Then hold your breath again," she said as she quickly swung her 
ass around and sat on his face again.

    The intensity of her weight bearing down on his face as she 
unrolled the rubber onto his cock almost made him come a second time 
before she was done.  Fortunately, she put it on him quickly and 
lowered herself onto his lap.  

    She grabbed his cock and slowly lowered herself onto him, guiding 
his member into her pussy as she settled onto his lap.

    Feeling himself deep inside her, he began to thrust into her, 
lifting her with each thrust, and even causing the massive truck to 
shake with each thrust. 

    Once again, she drained him and then fell on top of him.  For the 
third time, she planted her lips to his and sucked his tongue into 
her mouth.  They kissed a little more and then she rested her head on 
his shoulder.  "Good night, lover."

    "Good night," he answered, but she had already fallen asleep on 
top of him. 

    ###

    Einreb awoke to the sounds of trucks idling outside.  The part 
about "sleeps two" was a tad of an exaggeration.  Tamila was still 
lying on top of him when he awoke. 

    Tamila let out a yawn, kissed him, and leaned up, her ample 
breasts jiggling in his face.  "Morning, lover!"  

    "Let's get the inspection out of the way before we go have 
breakfast, okay?" 

    "Sure." 

    "Help me do my inspection, and we can have more fun before we go 
our separate ways.  Okay?" she asked.  

    "Okay." 

    She slipped back into her coverall and climbed out of the tractor 
cab.  "Check my brake lines and the fifth-wheel for me, while I check 
the back of the trailer." 

    The truck had 18 wheels, and Einreb had no idea which one was the 
fifth.  At least, he saw her glance between the back of the cab and 
the front of the trailer at the red, blue, and green coiled cables 
that connected the truck together, so he climbed up and looked them 
over.  The green cable just pulled out of the plug when he tugged on 
it, so he plugged it back in snugly.  The red and blue cables were a 
little odd; he managed to twist one off and realized that they were 
air hoses.  He wondered why on earth the trailer had to be connected 
to the tractor with air hoses, but he twisted the connected back on 
snugly.  He did the same with the other, and they seemed to be 
connected securely.

    Tamila had walked around the trailer.  "Start the truck for me?" 
she asked.

    Einreb shrugged; how difficult could it be to just start a truck?  
His Beetle had a stick, so he knew how to start a standard.  But man!  
There were more gauges than on a jet plane!  He wondered what the two 
big knobs were for -- the red one shaped like a stop sign, and the 
yellow diamond; they looked pretty important so he figured it was 
best not to touch those.  He jiggled the stick shift and wondered 
what the switch on the knob was for.  He stepped on the brake and the 
clutch and reached around the steering column, but couldn't find the 
key on the column.  Looking closely, he saw the key hanging from a 
simple keyhole under the dash.  He turned the key, but it only went 
one click and wouldn't go any further.  The truck didn't start.  And 
some alarm started buzzing loudly.

    Tamila climbed in the passenger side.  "Something wrong?"

    "Look, Tamila.  I got to tell you something."

    "What?"

    "I'm not a truck driver.  I just stopped in to the truck stop 
yesterday to get a burger at BK.  I haven't a clue about trucks."

    "Oh?  Then what do you do?"   
 
    "I'm a programmer."

    "Yeah?  Where?"

    "Well, do you want the whole story?"

    "I'm all ears, sugar!" 
 
    "I started at a company called Troll up in Mahwah.  I refused to 
do drugs at a party at this guy's house after work, and when he got 
promoted, he fired me."

    "Shit!"

    "Then I worked at AT&T in Piscataway until I complained about 
some office hazing."

    "Double shit!" 
 
    "Then I got a clerical job at Guardian out in Bethlehem; but I 
got fired because I had diarrhea a few weeks ago, and the cleaning 
lady complained about me causing the toilets to overflow."

    "Man!  Talk about a hard luck story!  Hey!  So you know what 
discrimination feels like now!"

    "Well, I guess your right.  I guess I do."

    "Going to sue the bastards?  I ain't no lawyer, but what that 
last company did was definitely against the ADA!"  

    "Yeah, maybe.  But I don't want to play victim or sue anyone.  I 
just want to put it behind me."  

    "So what you going to do now?"

    "I was on my way home to sign up to collect unemployment, that's 
what."

    "I got's a better idea than that!"

    "What?"

    "Ride with me!"

    "Ride with you?"

    "Yeah!" 

    "You mean, in a truck?  This truck?" 

    "Sure!  Lots of people team up.  Make more money that way!" 

    "But I don't know how to drive a truck!"

    "Then I'll teach you.  It ain't hard.  And I'll do all the alley 
work until you get good at it.  And you don't got to put up with no 
corporate bullshit no more!  C'mon!" 
 
    "Well, okay.  If I can hook my XBOX up to your TV in the back, 
you got yourself a partner!"

    "Yeehaw!  Let's sign the deal with a kiss."

    * END * 

-- 
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