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Message-ID: <42590asstr$1053691802@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
NNTP-Posting-Date: Thu, 22 May 2003 16:56:58 -0500
From: Rachael Ross <rache18us@yahoo.com>
MIME-Version: 1.0
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit
Subject: {ASSM} Necromancer (rache18us@yahoo.com) m/f, necro, rom, humor
Date: Fri, 23 May 2003 08:10:02 -0400
Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail
Approved: <assm@asstr-mirror.org>
Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d

Disclaimer: I wrote this because I thought it was funny. Anyone can
read it, but I'd prefer adults with a good imagination and sense of
humor. Read it with a lazy south-eastern kentucky accent.

Written in Seattle 2001

Explanation: This is in the form of a letter posted in a forum dealing
with psychological problems. I really did post it under the nick
"Necromancer" and I laughed for 3 days afterwards as I read the
replies... We call that trolling in the forum business. Most people
don't like it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Necromancer
by Rache

Heya great site I like it lots. Here's one for ya, my girlfriends
dead. yeah no shit. dead as hell but I love her cause she's my
girlfriend. I'll tell you whats goin on then ask my questions cause I
got a bunch.

She's buried and everything like that but I still like to go see her
and bring flowers and stuff. I like to think about her the way she
looked at the funeral was cool she was hot. They dressed her nice and
put a rose on her which was cool cause she's a rose freak she loved
the stupid things and I never gave her any except once or twice. 

But I was at the funeral parlor the day before she was gonna be buried
and it was just me and I touched her a little just her boobs they were
still kinda firm but i think it was cause her dress was kinda tight I
think. I kissed her too but her mouth was closed and wouldn't open I
don't know what those guys do there they glued it or something or is
that like rigor mortis? 

Anyway i kissed her a lot cause she smelled nice and I didn't know
they put all that makeup on dead people I guess they have to I got it
messed up a little but they fixed it. I wanted to do other stuff I
think she looked so hot layin there i just wanted to jump in and give
her some salomi for the trip you know? Can dead chicks get pregnant?
wow thats a rush! What if her little eggs are still alive I heard guys
sperm lives for a month after he's dead like hair keeps growin is that
true? 

It'd be cool to think about gettin her pregnant and then burying her
the next day cause it's not like the kid would live it'd be like part
of me was sleepin with her you know? We always used a rubber though so
I know she wasn't. But i think about it all the time gettin in that
coffin with her and pullin her white dress up and slippin her panties
to the side just shoving my hard cock inside and I know she'd be nice
and warm even if she was dead cause she was always ready if you know
what i mean? 

She was juicy and sweet I love her a lot. I was thinkin all this when
I was looking at her and it made my dick get really hard and I had my
hand in my pocket you know kinda playin with it when her mom comes in
sniffling and cried out mostly but she came right up next to me and
started talkin about how much she liked me and how special she was and
how at least she had a nice guy like me. 

All the time I'm rubbin my dick and thinkin I want to do stuff with
her while she's layin there and then Barb's mom [Barb was my gf] her
mom puts her arms around me and she wants a hug so of course I gotta
pull my hand out and start huggin this lady cause she started cryin
and everything again and I know she could feel my dick cause its like
lumber in my pants!! I could build a freakin house with it you know?

And so it feels nice huggin her and I'm lookin over my shoulder at her
little girl wantin to jump her dead ass right then and I feel like you
know pushin a little with my dick cause mom looks like Barb except
older but still a hottie and I figured she'd slap me or somethin but
she didn't she just pushed me away and she left she didn't say a word
to me for like a month even though i see her every day almost. 

But its ok now cause she told me she understood that some people cope
with stress in different ways than other people. She said those exact
words and I was like huh? Then i figured out cause her husbands a doc
and he talked to me too sayin that it was ok I was feelin aroused at
the funeral home cause my brain was trying to handle a difficult
situation and nerves get confused like telephone wires getting
switched to the wrong houses and he wanted to know if I was ok with
that. 

But hell yeah I was!! I was jackin off nearly every day thinking about
Barbie doll bein dead and me bein in there with her plantin my love
gun in her dead womb but I didn't say that cause he's a doc but he's
got guns too ya know? 

Instead i just said I felt a little guilty and I talked to Father
Duncan and it was ok and I knew it was ok then too for him cause he'd
never say anything to a priest and the priest couldnt say anything if
I really did say something which I didn't. 

So back at the funeral parlor after Barb's ma left I was alone again
every now and then some guy would pop through the door and look and
make sure everything was ok. But I stood by Barbie lookin at her and
touching just a little. The bottom half was closed or else I'd have
felt up her leg too cause she had super duper legs and I always liked
the way she looked. 

I just had to take out my dick so I did that and I was rubbin it a
little and doin stuff. I figured if anybody came in I'd hear it and I
could put it away really quick or fold my hands or do something but
nobody did and I ended up cummin right there in the funeral home
shootin off on my hand cause I didn't have anything else close by. I
wiped it on Barb's dress between her boobs cause she had a white dress
anyway I put a little on her lips too just like glaze for the lipstick
I messed up. They really put way too much I think but I put the rose
back right on top of my spunk and then I figured I best get out of
there cause I could feel wood comin back and I didn't wanna get caught
spankin on a dead chick even if she was hot like Barbie. But at least
I know she got a little bit of me with her I just wish it was more
like inside her ya know? 

So now anyway I got a new girlfriend but when I do it with her I'm
always thinkin bout Barb but not like when she was alive. I think
about her dead. I tell my gf not to move so much and I tried to get
her to shut up too cause she's a moaner I put a sheet over head so it
looks like shes not even there. I just wish she was Barbie and be dead
so its not the best for me anymore.

If i really wanna get off I go to the cemetary like early cause not so
many people around well not a lot anytime but early is the best. The
guy unlocks the gate and then he takes off cause he works down at Mels
supermart. 

I like to go to Barb's grave she has a nice headstone not real big but
it has roses around it and an angel carved too and says ~Beloved
daughter sept 4 1982 - april 16 2000~ which is cool cause I always
used to forget her birthday now I don't.

I like to bring her a rose and stand by her headstone it's just the
right height that I can pull out my dick and rub it on the top while I
talk to her tellin her how hot she is I say 'Barbie you are so freakin
hot, babe!' and I close my eyes and rub my dick all over that cold
smooth rock until I shoot and I make sure I get some right on the
ground and on the rose too if I can cause she loves roses. I do it
every week and I know she likes it cause I dream about her all the
time and she tells me it's ok cause she loves me. 

So is this normal? or am I really all screwed up like beyond the
beyond? Is it possible to dig a chick up and do her? How long til they
really start goin bad? it's been almost a year but I still think about
it cause I got a back hoe and everything. can a dead chick get
pregnant? i mean like how long does it take the eggs or whatever to
die? if she was like 3 minutes dead is it too late? I really like
thinkin about getting a dead girl pregnant. i know that's not normal.
but what the hell i'm not gonna go kavorkian on some chick just to do
it either. and how do I get my girlfriend into it? I told her I like
dead chicks but she thinks I'm joking with her even though I always
tell her to shut the hell up and stop moving. I tried to get her to
fuck me on Barb's grave but she won't go near it. She thinks we're
gonna go to hell or somethin. I think she's kinda jealous. Ok thanks
hope you guys can hook me up with some answers. keep the site goin man
and no ad banners thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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