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Subject: {ASSM} {REVIEW} The Annex Reviews 4/30/03
Date: Thu,  1 May 2003 05:10:02 -0400
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The Annex Reviews, 4/30/03
by Lady Cyrrh (ladycyrrh@aol.com)
Website: http://members.aol.com/ladycyrrh 



The Stories:


Rivals (Vinnie Tesla): M/F, F/F, cons, oral, exhib, 
   humor

It Came (Daphne Xu): teen, nosex, short

The Opening (john): M/F, cons, short

Female Plumbing Problems (Vulgar Argot): M/F, rom, myth, 
   humor

Jena Commits to Six Months, Part 1 (Dave Haugen): M/F, 
   BDSM, watersports, doggirl




Rivals [A] 
Where posted: ASSM 
When posted: 2/27/03 
Author: Vinnie Tesla
Author address: vinnie_tesla@yahoo.com
Type: M/F, F/F, cons, oral, exhib, humor

Burningman is a huge tribal (as in rave tribal, not 
Native American) festival held every Labor Day weekend 
in a remote area of the Nevada desert; it's a modern-day 
freakfest featuring didgeroo players, dreadlocked 
slackers, performance artists, and lots of casual 
nudity. For one week everyone turns out to watch and be 
watched, acting like total asses; then they go back to 
their day jobs, counting the days until next year's 
bash.

The narrator of this story is one of the return 
visitors, and this story describes the adventures he has 
with a female companion at the festival. The oh-so-cool 
Gen-X duo has a casual on-and-off-again sexual 
relationship with each other, but at the heart they're 
really best buds who prefer to hang out together. When 
an attractive female stranger pitches her tent near 
theirs they are both intrigued, and make clear to each 
other they intend to seduce her; thus the rivalry of the 
title is born.

The story was a very good evocation of the strangeness 
and chaoticism of the festival -- I've not attended, but 
I've had friends who have, and am also familiar with the 
peculiar West Coast blend of wheatgrass and weirdness it 
represents -- and in that it was very interesting to 
read, as I've known character types like that in real 
life. But because I knew them, the story got monotonous 
after a while. Casual no-strings sex done with art and 
humor is nice, and the author writes it very well. But 
it also means there's no tension and conflict -- no 
jealousies, no awkward confessions, no daring moments, 
no sudden disgusts or heart-racing attraction. Those are 
the things that interest me as a reader. The story was 
more of a travelogue with sex, in fact, than a story. A 
very good and evocative one (and for that I rated it 
highly) but when all the characters good-naturedly fuck 
each other without thinking twice, how can you 
distinguish Amanda from Tanya, or from the topless 
dancing girl at the next didgeroo booth? I couldn't. 




It Came [B-] 
Where posted: ASSM 
When posted: 4/19/01 
Author: Daphne Xu
Type: teen, nosex, short

It's been a while since I saw a new Daphne Xu story, so 
I thought I'd read this. I've loved the "Teen Blowjob" 
series for years, and so expected something similar... 
deadpan, low-key, shaggy dog, and very funny. 

Young Tony is on the cusp of puberty and is sleeping in 
his bed when he hears moaning noises and wakes up 
drenched in sweat as if from a terrible nightmare. This 
occurs two more times. I expected there to be some 
twist, the moaning and gasping a horrorific metaphor for 
sexual maturity, for example, that would resolve itself 
in some amusing punchline. So I read this to the end, 
and stopped, scratching my head. Uh-huh. Hmm. OK, 
where's the joke? 

Daphne, did I miss something?




The Opening [B] 
Where posted: ASSM 
When posted: 4/13/01 
Author: john
Author address: johndear@softhome.net
Type: M/F, cons, short

A man goes to the opening of a new show by a married 
female artist he knows and is apparently very close to, 
and, it turns out later, infatuated with. Later, at 
another opening, he decides to seduce her. 

This was one of those slice-of-life stories, written for 
a "Thoughts of You" writing challenge; so, I suppose 
that because it is supposed to be someone's thoughts, 
the prose is rather disjointed, as most people don't 
think in a logical, linear way, except when they have 
some work-related problem to solve. But I honestly 
didn't know what to make of passages like this:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Two women.  Cocktail dresses.  Pearls.  Discussed the 
shades of green.  Her wallpaper, it seemed.  The light.  
The empty space beside a cupboard.  To balance out that 
godforsaken chair.  Patiently awaited time to meet the 
artist, rustic in her chambray and her jeans.  Not 
knowing all their questions might be answered by the man 
who stood behind them, listening.  How her paint had 
been applied.  How her colours had evolved.  The 
meanness of a life in far off Renison.  The temper of 
her dog.  Her recipe for moose.  Then spotted friends 
across the room; moved off for second guesses.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

It's evocative, but of what?

After a few more paragraphs like these I felt skittish 
and jumpy, not really in the frame of mind to enjoy a 
nice short sex story. Nice, I guess, in a literary 
sense, but I like plots and characters, or something so 
odd or unusual I don't care if it lacks plots and 
characters.




Female Plumbing Problems [A+] 
Where posted: ASSM 
When posted: 4/6/03
Author: Vulgar Argot
Author address: vulgarargotREMOVEALL@CAPSinsidejoke.tv
Author website: 
http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/VulgarArgot/index.htm
l
Type: M/F, rom, myth, humor

Software engineer Chris is not having a good day. First 
he has to solve a complicated problem from a customer, 
causing him to break a date with a co-worker for the 
third time; then, when he comes home, the plumbing 
breaks down in his house. When he unscrews the pipe, lo 
and behold, the watery form of a river nymph pours out 
to stand at his feet:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
The water was not behaving as water should. Instead, it 
coalesced into the form of a woman, beautiful and 
waifish, with a lilly worn in her long brown hair. To 
Chris (whose full name was Cristopolos,) she looked 
Greek. She was also stark naked.

Chris, too stunned to move, looked back and forth. The 
first words out of his mouth were, "If this is some sort 
of elaborate joke, someone is going to need a 
proctologist to remove this wrench from their..."

"Excuse me," the woman said in a voice reminiscent of a 
waterfall Chris had found once, far back in the woods 
where no one ever seemed to go, "Are you a god?"
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

This was a sweetly humorous story, most of the giggles 
coming from the nymph's maladjustment to the 21st 
century. She can't figure out why modern men don't 
pursue her as the Ancient Greeks did, for example (as it 
turns out improved standards of health and hygiene has 
made modern females as lovely as the nymphs once were.) 
But she copes, discovering that modern men have their 
advantages, too ("Zeus had been a selfish lover, even 
among the gods. Heracles's breath always reeked of 
garlic. And Apollo was all tongue.") Soon,

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Oneone soon felt her body beginning to be shaken by 
waves of pleasure that eddied out from where Chris's 
fingers entered her in orgasmic ripples. She'd felt this 
way before, but only as a river, never as a woman.

"You're so wet," Chris whispered to her.

"Of course," said Oneone, giggling, "I'm always wet."
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The story ends on a bittersweet note that didn't really 
surprise me, but that was the only way it could have 
ended, I think.

Warm and funny, and recommended.




Jena Commits to Six Months, Part 1 [B] 
Where posted: ASSM 
When posted: 4/12/01 
Author: Dave Haugen
Author address: dave_haugen@hotmail.com
Type: M/F, BDSM, watersports, doggirl

Jena is a knockout 23-year-old divorcee interested in 
playing out her submission fantasies in real life, and 
Dave is the top who thinks he can fulfill them... and 
so, like a pig and a pit at a Hawaiian luau, the two 
meet, exchanging long lists of what they will and won't 
put up with from each other ("Dave chuckled to himself 
at the number of MAYBEs in her responses.  It was as 
though she was too naïve to really know what was going 
to be expected of her if she actually decided to become 
his slave.")

I guess I've been reading too many BDSM slave stories, 
because I've gotten mighty tired of them, or at least of 
this particular kind. I call it jerkfic, because the 
male dom is less interested in a cooperative 
relationship with the sub where both roleplay their 
fantasies, and more into asserting stereotypical male 
caveman status. Right off the bat Mr. Smirking Jerk 
whallops his 5'2 95-pound sweetie in the face, then puts 
her in a doggie kennel and gives her a plastic bowl to 
eat in from the floor. He even goes so far as to have 
her download porn for him from the internet, sweating 
diligently over the computer as he relaxes in a La-Z-boy 
lounger watching TV ("For the next two hours, Dave sat 
in his lazy boy sipping port as he watched television, 
glancing now and then at the screen behind the tv to see 
what porn Jena was surfing and saving.  At one point, 
Dave had her sit in front of him so he could rest his 
legs on her ass, while she knelt down, continuing to 
type and surf, albeit uncomfortably.")

If you like the idea of this, go to it; but since jerks 
are readily apparent in real life, I see no reason to 
read about them.

____________________________________________________
Comments to: ladycyrrh@aol.com
Website--->  http://members.aol.com/ladycyrrh

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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