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Subject: {ASSM} (song fest) rp Words of Wisdom (furry M/vixen rom nosex) Stasya
Date: Sun, 10 Nov 2002 06:10:03 -0500
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<1st attachment, "wordsofwisdom.txt" begin>
Song Fest (mood challenge) furry M/vixen rom nosex (RP)
-
This one has a rather unusual history, even for one of my works.
Merlin is one of my talker personas. Lady Chrystal, aka Velvet,
is lifted from 'The Tails of Rabelaisia, a furry world/series in
which I and another author collaborated or wrote individual
stories. Lady Kay is based on, with permission, a woman I have
known for years.
The closing scene, ie the arrival and greeting ceremony, is
'lifted' from a longer story I did for 'The Fantasy Train' but
never posted. After consideration, I realized that so many of
the references in it were linked to posts in ASSD that unless a
person had read the posts indirectly refered to, the story would
be almost meaningless to a casual reader. The story was a
mystery that had Merlin hosting a group of people from ASSD as
they solved it. (It was also my first attempt to write a
mystery.)
I appeared as Merlin but used my regular nym. Lady Kay was a new
character, developed deliberately, as were the twins Cathy and
Becky.
Then, there is the matter of just *who* my guests were. <vbg>
In order of appearance: Lord Shon, Maria Gonzales, Starshadow
(from my 'Starshadow and Friends' series), Virago Blue, Lord
Malinov, Miss Behavin', Frank Mcoy, Bronwen.
Oh, the 'train' was also special. You see, I borrowed none other
than 'Dorable Dora...
In a concession to ah... discreetion, I decided that it would
not be wise to post it because I was fairly new to the group and
some of these folks might take offense to the way I 'saw' them in
this situation (no sex btw, except for what Merlin and his people
get involved in). OTOH, if enough people request it, I can knock
the dust off and post it. :/
Anyway, as someone else says: "That's my story--and I'm sticking
to it!"
----
Words of Wisdom
Merlin and Lady Chrystal
by: Stasya T. Canine
---
"When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom
Let it be
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom
Let it be"
-
Quoted from the song 'Let it Be'
copyright by the Beatles
----
I lean back with a sigh and let the words and music wash over me
as I sit and gaze out the window at the passing scenery. For
thirty years those simple words have been my means of 'summoning'
the only person to ever become *my* 'Mother Mary'. There is
nothing more for me to do - except wait.
The subtle scent of sun-warmed fur is the first thing to impinge
on my awareness and let me know someone is near. I take a deeper
breath and 'taste' the subtle nuances that include something
barely detectable. Female. One I know and love.
Delicate paws flow around my neck and pause before gently pulling
me back against her warm, fur covered body.
"Hello Merlin. 'Times of trouble'?"
"My personal 'Mother Mary'. Hello, Lady Chrystal." I reach to
gently enfold her fur-covered paws in my hands. "You knew?"
Her voice is calm. "Of course. I knew before you 'called' me."
I feel her body shake briefly and then it stills. "Kay and the
twins said you needed me. I was planning to join you anyway. I
also, have needs." There is a long silence as I consider her
response. During that silence, she has pulled free and begun
massaging my neck and shoulders. Instead of worrying about my
problems, I return to gazing out the window at the scenery and
relax into her gentle ministrations.
"Merlin?" She stops massaging me and slowly walks around to
settle in my lap. As she leans into my chest, I wrap my arms
around her and tenderly hold her as she begins to shiver. "I
need more than your 'words of wisdom'. I need you." She leans
to the side and turns to bury her face in my shoulder. I feel
her shaking as she sobs. I have to strain to hear her next
words because they are gasped out in a whisper that is nearly
overwhelmed by her need to cry. "Alex. Is. Dead."
All of my own problems are forgotten. I squeeze Vel in a gentle
hug and gaze off at nothing while I wait for her to recover.
Eventually, as the train cruises through darkness, she explains.
"I knew it would happen someday. It's not what you think. He
led a full life and died of old age. I thought I would be ready
when it happened."
She takes a deep breath and wipes her eyes with the back of one
paw. "I wasn't."
Under other conditions, her closeness would inspire other,
pleasanter, thoughts. Instead, all I can think of is our shared
past. Alex, her mate on Rabelaisia, knew of what she and I shared
and approved of the relationship. He and I had several quiet
talks over the years. One of those talks was about the
relationship Vel and I share. He had been pragmatic about the
situation. 'You walk in a world I can only dimly glimpse. I
wish fate hadn't chosen Vel to walk there but I can rest easy
knowing she has a guide worthy of her.' I had not expected
that. 'Alex, often it is she who guides and comforts me. Lady
Kay has ties to my heart and the twins have a claim on me that
cannot be denied. In addition to the love we share, Lady
Chrystal has a unique claim on my soul.' I had taken a deep
breath. 'We are one in a way that few would understand. I am
what she would have been had she been male and living in my
world. She is me, as I would have been had I been female in
yours. We discovered that bond after we fell in love with each
other.' His huge head had nodded and then he had smiled. 'She
*is* lovable, isn't she? Take good care of her when I'm gone.'
I had not trusted myself to speak so I had returned his nod. It
was the last time he and I spoke of our shared love for Velvet,
his mate.
"Vel?" No answer. I look at her and can't keep myself from
smiling. She fell asleep while I was letting myself remember.
The sunrise is glorious but the only sunrise I want to see is the
one that used to live in Vel's eyes.
I barely remember the first time I lost a woman I had loved for
years. Now, after a long life, the pain is muted but still there
as a reminder of part of the price those such as I and Vel pay
for who and more importantly, *what* we are.
It is this experience that tells me she will recover from the
pain of her loss. Eventually.
I feel her body shift as she begins to wake up. She stiffens
slightly and then, before her eyes open, her arms pull my face to
hers and we share a kiss. As her eyes open, I see the barest
glimmer of the inner light I am used to.
"Merlin? You once offered me the haven of your castle."
"Yes."
She nods slowly and turns her head to look out the window.
"Sunrise. Beautiful."
I wait.
"Lady Kay and the twins?" I realize she is asking if there will
be problems.
"Of course they will welcome you as a resident. You don't need
me to tell you they love you."
"Be right back." She gets to her feet and heads for the
bathroom. I smile slightly as I get up and do the same. When I
return, she is settled in the chair opposite mine and a table has
been placed between them. With their usual efficiency, the
porters have brought us breakfast. As we nibble, we talk of
many things. Gradually, I learn she has severed all ties with
her own world. "I set it up as if I had vanished at sea. The
family business has run itself for years. I took a small, one
person sailing vessel out in order to be with my thoughts. Those
voyages are something of a tradition in our family. This time,
the boat sank during a storm." She smiles sadly. "I did listen
closely when you chose to talk of your own past. Perhaps, my
solution was easier to find. Rabelaisia is a harder, yet kinder
world. People will wonder what happened to me. I imagine most
will assume that the storm that came up was stronger than my
skills." She pauses. "By all reasonable standards, I have
already lived longer than I should. Some will speak of 'it was
time' and eventually I will be only a vanishing memory."
"So, here you are. Eating breakfast with an old man." I let the
context speak for itself.
"Well, I did wander your world for a few months. I wanted to
meet the people you live with." A bit of her old self returns to
her eyes.
"I knew about Kay and the twins. I spent a month at your castle
before I came to you."
I look at her in surprise. I've been wandering the world for
over a year without any messages or other contact with Kay and
the twins. Kay, or the twins for that matter, will make the
decision to interrupt my infrequent 'vacations' only if there is
great need. Belatedly, I realize I shouldn't be surprised at
her delay in letting me know she was on Earth. I finally nod and
indicate she should continue. "Merlin?" She holds up those
delicate paws in a gesture I have seen her use in my dreams. It
is something done formally and only if there is great emotional
commitment between the people involved. "No ceremonies. I would
feel trapped right now. We're already mated anyway. Now?" Her
eyes shrug as her paws remain in place. "I've had a lot of
years to think about us. I knew the first time we met. It is
our way." She tilts that vulpine head sideways and studies me
thoughtfully.
"And?" I look at her paws and then at her.
"The formal recognition gesture of mind-mates that also asks if
the other is willing to link their lives together. There are no
ceremonies on my world. This... Is the closest thing we have to
a bonding ritual that is as sanctified as your more formal
ceremonies." For a long time, I've known what Vel means to me.
"I never felt we needed any ceremonies. We know what we mean to
each other." I hold up my hands and carefully position my
fingers. Once sure I have things right, I lean forward and
gently touch her paws. As I do so, our fingers slowly
intertwine.
We hold that pose for minutes and then she gently pulls herself
free and leans back with a slight smile.
"I won."
"Hmm? Won what?"
"The twins bet me you wouldn't recognize the gesture and know
what to do. Kay agreed with me. She said you loved me so much
that you would have long ago learned our customs."
"Nikki taught me when I asked." I settle back after finishing my
food. Thoughtfully, I swirl my juice. "He was 'gently amused' by
my eagerness to learn your world's more formal customs."
"I think he knew. If he didn't, I'm certain Ash did."
I get a warm smile that turns wistful.
"Vel? Be grateful you had a whole new world and someone who
loves you, to turn to."
"I said I've been here for months." She shrugs. "I needed the
time to rediscover my center. I loved Alex. I still do. But,
once you and I realized how my future had changed when we met, I
started preparing myself. Alex's pragmatism near the end helped.
Just before he died, he told me of his request and your
promise." Her lips quirk slightly. "Not that I needed his
reminder of what you and I mean to each other. I would have
turned to you anyway."
"Now? Kay and the twins helped - a lot. Still, they aren't you
and they understand that. The twins wanted to let me have you
exclusively until I was ready to share." Her eyes come alive at
some memory. "I reminded them that our worlds differ in many
important ways."
"Anyway, here I am." She sips at her own glass of juice.
"My troubles will take time to be dealt with. I know that.
Shall we move on to the reasons you need me?"
"Always my Vel. Always the consummate Bard." I get a wan smile
for my compliment.
"I was thinking about emigrating to Rabelaisia." It is a quiet
comment that gets Vel's full attention. "My first thoughts were
that on your world, it would be easier to quietly live my life."
I gaze out the window and see nothing but my memories. "It
wouldn't have worked, of course."
"No." Her voice is filled with a wry agreement. We share sad
smiles.
I continue with my thoughts. "Here, until recently, the use of
power was almost unknown. Discovering your world changed that.
How long would I have remained undiscovered on a world where
power is a part of daily life?"
"Your aura is almost unique. You would have been spotted and
welcomed as soon as you landed." She indicates she needs a
refill. While her glass is being topped, we study each other.
"I wouldn't have been able to hide who I am for very long.
That's only *one* of the reasons I severed my ties to my home."
I nod. "About what I had figured out after I reconsidered
things." There's no need for either of us to speak of the main
reason. Once I had accepted I couldn't go to her, I had settled
myself to wait for her arrival on Earth.
I pause and gaze into my glass. Softly, I begin to tell part of
my own story.
"You know me as Merlin. Long ago, I was known by another name.
That name isn't important."
"No, that's not quite right. It became meaningless as a natural
result of the path a young man chose to walk. I was not the first
person to be known as 'Merlin'. I am not even the last or the
only."
"You see, for many centuries, Merlin' has been a title. One that
honors the one who set our goals and searched for companions who
would be willing to trek down an often hidden path to a future
none could clearly see."
"We are, in some ways, responsible for things in much the way the
Bards on your world are. We are seekers after knowledge. We are
the keepers of a dimly remembered past that in all honesty, we
never expected to be needed or used again. Unlike the Bards, we
do not guide. We are not here to remind people of their past
mistakes or gently guide them to some vision of the future. We
gather the bits and pieces of knowledge and we observe.
Sometimes we might become a 'bringer of luck'. We can't be
everywhere and we don't try to influence the course of destiny."
"We collect the past and save it. We feel life's flow but we do
not try to move it in any way. Sometimes, one of us will quietly
collect a person who has found this path on their own."
"Above all, we simply hold our knowledge in trust in case a time
comes when it will be needed again."
"The discovery of Rabelaisia changed everything. Not just our
world was changed. The discovery of Rabelaisia and the
subsequent coming of the Bards to Earth removed any need for the
Merlins."
I look up and see eyes that slowly fill with understanding.
"I gained the fulfillment of my most cherished dream when I met
you. At the same time, once I learned of the 'Bardic Way', I
knew I had lost the reason for my existence."
"My vacation has been more than that. Like you, I have been
coming to terms with a great change in my life."
"I have lost my purpose." I let the long suppressed tears flow
freely.
Kay and the twins had been nearly hysterical when I showed up.
All they could tell me was that something was bothering Merlin.
Outwardly, he was still the pillar of wisdom and strength that
was the creator of so many legends. Still, as lovers often will,
they knew something was bothering him. Kay had reluctantly
admitted she couldn't get Merlin to confide in her. "Lady
Chrystal." It was the first time I had seen her famed grace and
poise crumble into nothing. "He loves me and I love him. But,
ours is an unconsummated love. By mutual choice, we agreed that
some paths were best left untrod. I have often wished otherwise
but... We have reached our balance. Until you came, he would
confide in me. After?" She smiled to let me know she wasn't
bitter. "Something changed. Some great burden came to rest on
his shoulders. A burden he refuses to share. You brought him,
and us, great joy and for that I am grateful beyond anything you
can understand."
"Somehow, I *know* that his joy is also the cause of his pain."
"Merlin loves me. He also loves the twins. You..." She hugged
me and cried. "You are his mate."
I held Kay close. "I'll see what I can do." In the depths of my
mind, I completed the promise. 'It is not as a Bard that I
promise this. It is as his mate.' "Kay." I leaned back to
look into her eyes. "Something you should know. I am here to
offer myself as his mate. Alex is dead and I have severed all my
ties to my birthworld."
She gasped in pain.
I nodded and smiled bleakly. "I am not ready to see him yet.
The
pain is still too fresh in my soul. I promise you, when I am
ready, I will
seek him out. I need him as much as you hope he will confide in
me."
She nodded slowly, reluctantly. "That changes things. We knew
that eventually you and Merlin would be together." She shook
herself slightly
and studied me. "Yes, I sometimes have the sight. You must be
sure when
you see him next." She gazed off and said no more.
"Sure? Of what?" I am not used to the 'seeings' that some
Earth-humans are able to do. We have nothing that is equivalent.
Still, I have learned that when one such as Lady Kay speaks from
within this 'other sight', there is great personal peril in
failing to heed their words.
Her smile was less forced. "Return to your center else all will
be lost between the two of you."
Now, looking at Merlin and his tears, I understand her cryptic
words.
"So. Fate, in her attempt to be kind, is once again being her
cruelest." I smile slightly as Merlin looks at me. "I am
reminded of a time in my own life, nearly forty years ago now,
and the events that took place when I returned to my family home
- with Alex." He looks puzzled. He knows the story of how
slavers assassinated my family and tried to make it appear the
work of the assassin's guild.
"There was more. A hidden story that that only a few know of."
I gaze off and remember my shock at Nikkolai's tale of recent
change. "The Bards' stubborn adherence to the original 'Bardic
Way' - almost became their downfall. In short, they were quickly
becoming useless and if not for the vision of two lonely Bards,
would have lost their relevance and their purpose."
"Indeed? You're saying that in your, forgive me this, short life
you have been faced with this loss of everything you have lived
for?" He's quietly studying me.
"In a way. Nikki presented the problem and the already
implemented solution at the same time. He had to. It was
essential that I knew what had happened before I made my own
decisions. There was another reason as well. I became one of
the 'Council of Three' at that time."
"Oh?"
I sigh deeply. "Yes. The thing is, what happened then was
nothing like what you and the other Merlins are experiencing. We
were able to adjust by redefining our relationship to our people.
We didn't suddenly lose our sense of direction. Our people had
changed and we unexpectedly discovered that the values we
carefully remembered had become a normal part of everyday life.
We were no longer needed to remind people of the past and their
responsibilities."
"Anyway, the ultimate result was that Bards could live as
ordinary people who happened to have some unordinary skills. The
people of Rabelaisia had long ago accepted that while we are
Bards and bearers of great responsibilities, we are also people.
They accepted that there would be times when we would have to act
as a person rather than as a Bard. They accepted, long before we
did, that a Bard acting as a person facing a personal crisis
should not be held accountable for those actions - as a Bard. As
a person, yes."
"It took an internal crisis within the guild before the Bards
could accept that in order to live in the world we had worked
for, we too had to change."
"I don't see where you are headed with this." He's leaning
forward slightly. It's as if he thinks he could see my purpose
by getting closer to my words.
"It took one Bard to see the coming problem and eventually he and
his son found a solution." I look at him and sigh deeply. "That
is the position you are in now. You see a problem nobody knows
exists. Or have the others seen it as well?"
"I don't know. Unlike the Bards, we are completely independent.
It is often decades between our infrequent contacts." He sighs
and settles back. "We are equals but we also have our
specialties. Something as major as the end to our purpose would
be cause for a call to meeting. None has been issued."
"Indeed?" He nods slowly in response to my question.
"That explains much I could not understand."
"Merlin." My voice is gentle. "I suspect the others see it too.
Like you, they are so used to working alone they are probably
trying to find a solution - on their own."
I gaze out at the passing scenery and let my thoughts wander for
long minutes before I turn back to him. "Do you trust me?" He
looks startled that I would ask such a question. I hold up a paw
to stop him from answering immediately. "You aren't going to
like what I have to say." His mouth snaps shut. It is my turn
to wait. I watch as he shakes his head as if to clear it of
unwelcome thoughts.
"You are my mate. You are also a Bard. I will hear what my mate
has to tell me and know that she is speaking as a Bard. This...
Should make the lesson more palatable."
I smile reluctantly. "You sound like a Bard."
"Very well then. To business." I lower my voice. "Listen
carefully."
I reach for his hands and hold then gently. "You haven't lost
your purpose, you've completed it. It's time to retire and
follow your desires rather choose your path as a result of some
long ago vision. Let the past become the past and become the
person you were meant to be."
I squeeze his hands as they tremble. "I will be there with you
as we look to the unknown future--together."
Eventually, as trains will, we arrived at our destination. I've
deliberately not talked about what Vel told me and she has
respected that silence. During the last few days we've cautiously
felt our way to a new balance in our relationship. Before, we
were lovers and close friends who seldom had time to be with each
other. Duty had prevented us from taking the time to relax and
intertwine our lives. 'Be myself'. I think Vel's assessment
of the situation is correct. There are things I have to do
before I can take that step but her gentle words did point out a
new path. Those words were the the first she had spoken to me as
a Bard. Now, I am beginning to understand the reasons the
'Bardic Way' had the power to change a world that was born in
war.
It gives me hope.
* * *
It's late afternoon and a whimsical breeze swirls around us in
greeting as we step through the doors and to the ground.
After we step on the platform, we pause to savor the heady tang
of country air. The train pulls away and enters a tunnel arch
that swallows it a car at a time. A last, trailing whistle and we
are caressed by the sounds of a rural silence.
Before us is a gravel driveway that passes through lawns, shrubs
and carefully maintained flower beds to...
Home.
We wrap our arms around each other as we stroll up the driveway.
"I give you Merlin's Castle. Be welcome My Lady Chrystal."
I turn my head slightly to see tears begin to flow. "It looks...
Different somehow. How come so formal?"
Before us is a stone castle with all the trimmings. Banners and
flags are draped and hanging from poles. The groundskeepers are
lined up on either side of the walk that leads to the drawbridge.
"The 'difference' as you call it, is one I don't think you've
seen before. There is a formal welcoming ritual that Lady Kay
and I perform when I return after a long absence. She 'knows'
when I will be arriving and she and the others take the time to
deck the place out in full display." I give her a slight
squeeze. "Since you will be calling it home, she will insist on
getting together with you and working out your own welcoming."
We pause and gaze at the sight. "Formality is very important to
those who live extended lives. We design rituals that remind us
of our purposes." The two stone Irish Wolfhounds that guard
the entrance suddenly shimmer and come to life. As they run
towards us, they are barking joyfully. I kiss Vel and barely
have time to disengage from her embrace before the wolfhounds hit
me at the same time and knock me down. A couple of licks in
greeting and they shift again.
Once fully shifted, two hermaphrodites fall on me and begin to
nuzzle and otherwise make it clear that I am very, very welcome.
I hug each of them, bestow some deep kisses and then pull back a
bit.
"Cathy, Becky. There will be some changes. Changes I imagine
you already know about. Lady Chrystal and I are now mated."
They look at each other and then nod. "Yes, we hoped it would
happen."
I hug them both and then smile. "As much as I would enjoy
staying here, the gravel is digging into my back and I think Kay
would like a chance to officially settle Vel in her new rooms
before everyone gets involved in the welcoming party. You know
how she gets if we ignore protocol."
"Help me up, you two."
A final hug, quick kisses and we are standing once again.
I glance at Vel and get rewarded with a tolerant grin. Cathy and
Becky flank me and I put an arm around each slender waist. Once
we settle our positions, we continue our sedate stroll to the
drawbridge.
Cathy and Becky are a part of my life that Vel has known about
for many years.
I whisper to Becky. She grins at me and then turns her head to
smile at Velvet.
"Lady Chrystal. Until the formal announcement of your new
status, we could only hope that things would work out between the
two of you and you would join us here."
She hesitates. "Thank you for returning the true Merlin to us.
We have missed him."
I look at her and can't help my slight frown. I glance over at
Vel and see that she too has caught the unspoken nuance in
Becky's statement. I relax and shake my head slightly. It is
something she will need to know anyway. When we reach the edge
of the drawbridge, we stop. Becky and Cathy pull away and
carefully straighten my clothing. Once finished, they blur into
their wolfhound forms and settle on their haunches beside me.
I turn my head in Vel's direction. "My Lady Chrystal. Please
pause here and enjoy the view. There are certain formalities to
be observed. I imagine that it won't be long before you, Lady
Kay, the twins and the rest of the staff build your own
traditions."
In the following silence, I make one last check to be sure my
clothing is just so. I take a deep breath and begin.
I start with a rising sweep of my right hand that leaves it
outstretched as my formal cloak appears and settles over it. I
put the cloak on and carefully arrange its folds. Next, I clap
my hands together sharply from left to right. As I draw them
apart, a traditional wizard's hat is revealed. It gets carefully
placed on my head.
Another clap, this time from high to low, produces my wand.
With studied calm, I use the wand to produce an arch of water
that extends from each side of the drawbridge to a peak 15 feet
above it.
As one, the hounds and I step under the arch and wait.
The polished oak gates swing open to reveal a woman dressed in a
simple country dress.
She walks forward until she is in the middle of the drawbridge.
She curtseys and then speaks.
"Merlin - and Master of The Castle."
"As always, as Lady of the Castle, I greet thee in thy return."
"As it was. As it will be, I bid thee welcome to this, thy true
home."
She raises her left hand and holds it there, palm towards me.
I raise my right hand and walk forward until our palms touch.
"Lady Kay.
"Keeper of Merlin's Castle. Keeper of my true home."
"Keeper of my heart."
"As it was. As it shall always be, I greet thee and thank thee
for thy welcome."
We drop our hands, briefly hug each other and turn to face Lady
Chrystal.
"Now that the formalities are over, enter and be welcome - My
Lady."
------
Stasya T. Canine
July 19-21, 2000 - revised August 6-9, 2000
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