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Message-ID: <37930asstr$1029733807@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: Peaches and Cream  <peachescreamreviews@yahoo.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} {REVIEW} Peaches and Cream Reviews: #18
Date: Mon, 19 Aug 2002 01:10:07 -0400
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Hi! We're Peaches & Cream. We're just two ordinary Joes who like
reading and romance. Recently, there was a Summer Solstice Romance
Festival on ASSM, and it caught our attention. We started discussing
the stories and our reviews were born. Our format is simple: one of us
starts the review, the other chimes in, and then the starter finishes
it off. Because this is all about romance, we'll be scoring with 0-5
kisses. We're changing our format to include more than one story per
issue. There is a website devoted to the festival where you can find
all the stories we will review. 

http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Rui_Favorites/www/RomFest

***

Peaches & Cream Reviews: #18

In her first passion woman loves her lover,
In all the others all she loves is love.
--Lord Byron (1788-1824), English poet.

Stories to be reviewed:

French Lessons by Couture
It Started With A Kiss by Neil Anthony/Dr. Spin
Knowledge Too Soon by El Gato
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
French Lessons by Couture
(FFM, Femdom, TG, Rom)
http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Couture/www/FL.htm

***

Peaches:

An admitted kept man gets more than he bargained for when a french
maid is added to the household. For me, this story is strictly stroke.
Its purpose is to arouse those who are interested in the type of story
that fall under its coding. If you're looking for that type of story,
then I highly recommend this one. It's written better than most stroke
stories. Its plot is humorous and titillating. There's never any
confusion on what orifice is being used or for what purpose. I did
have some difficulty with the time factor--within two days, we have a
man going from macho gigolo to simpering sod. I should think at least
a week would be required.

There are other problems, but I don't find it necessary to list them.
Those that want to read stroke don't normally care much about
believability or inconsistencies. They want action. This story gives
it to them.

Unfortunately, if you're looking for romance, as we are in this forum,
you'll not find it here.

1.5 Kisses for Romance
4.0 Lashes for Stroke

***

Cream:

I don't have much to add. I couldn't really understand why the guy
went along with the maid's requests. Maybe it was the allure of the
French.  Maybe something got lost in the translation.  Not too far
into this story I lost interest in the characters. Halfway through I
lost interest in the plot. I think you're right, Peaches: the story's
purpose is primarily to get us into the sex scenes. The setup and the
conclusion aren't horrible by any means, the writing is skillful,
fluid.  My disappointment is probably a measure of my own stroke
preferences. 

2 kisses

***

Peaches:

The allure of a french maid was the only reason I could come up with
as to why he so willingly went along with everything. I kept looking
for some secret concoction she was feeding him, at least. To tell you
the truth, French is a beautiful language, but I was really getting
annoyed with it by story's end.

***

Peaches: 1.5 romantic kisses 4.0 lashes
Cream: 2 kisses
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
It Started With A Kiss by Neil Anthony/DrSpin 
(MF)
http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/36953

***

Cream:

This is a story you and your partner or lover should read and then
discuss.  And then you can fuck each other's brains out.  It's not
that the story is especially sexy; there's not lots of juicy
detail--the descriptions and accounts aren't likely the appeal to your
prurient interests; and it's not that the chemistry between the
characters is infectious or even perhaps that you'll really care about
them a whole lot; and it's not that that the plot is going to twist,
spiral, and wring you through romantic deliriums or that the climax is
breathtaking in the least.  It's just a really well-written story
about the nature of love and sex and how things work out sometimes.

In grade school Cherie gives Ian a kiss, and he's smitten.  They grow
up and grow apart: Ian loves Cherie, but to her she's just the best
buddy.  By high school less than that:

>Somebody had a birthday party, and Cherie got drunk and pulled a train. Not a long one. 
>Just four or five guys. I know all about it because I was there. Saw it happen. Tried to 
>stop it, but she was mad and beyond listening or caring. They queued for her outside a 
>bedroom in the guy's house. The door opened for the third guy in the line-up, and I 
>elbowed him aside and barged in to rescue her. She was naked, flat on her back, tits 
>glorious, long legs spread, with a stupid and vacant smile on her face. 

>"Ian Mackintosh," she slurred at me as I stood at the foot of the bed. "Well, why the hell >not?" 


Sixteen years after that first kiss, Ian runs into Cherie, and she
doesn't seem to recognize him. That's how the story starts. Maybe it's
her turn to rescue him.

4 3/4 kisses.

***

Peaches:

It is a very well-written story. It isn't romantic in a traditional
sense, and yet, maybe it is. What is more romantic then a man who has
loved only one woman all his life?

This story is real, down to the grubbiness-of-life-kind-of-real. It
won't leave you feeling dewy-eyed, but it will make you think.

It's fast-paced, easy to read, and keeps you interested to the last
line. 

4.5 kisses

***

Cream:

Actually this story keeps you interested a little beyond the last
line.

***

Peaches: 4.5 kisses
Cream: 4 3/4 kisses
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Knowledge Too Soon by El Gato
(m/F, Rom, First, Slow)
http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2002/36897

***

Peaches:

His overprotective parents send a fifteen-year-old boy to a summer
program at a nearby college, where there is no supervision. While he
is there, the boy meets the college girl of every fifteen-year-old
boy's fantasy. She takes him under her wing and teaches him everything
he needs to know. 

The story is tender and gentle and very, very slow. It's nearly 10,000
words in length and after reading it, I know little more about Don
(the boy) than I did when it started. And the only thing I really
learned about Dee (the college girl) is she says, "baby" and "lover" a
lot.

There's a lot of repeating of words and ideas in the same paragraph or
in neighboring paragraphs that lead me to believe this story could be
pared down by a quarter.

The sex is sweet for the most part, but we jump into some anal sex
(not in the codes.) It seemed unwarranted, almost as if because the
narrator had warned from the beginning that he had learned a lot, (I
counted at least 3 times this point is stated) the author felt it
necessary to add the anal sex. If we were to follow this couple, the
anal sex would seem a natural progression. As it's written, it seems
tacked on.

With some slashing, this story could be excellent. It's too long, even
for a fantasy of a lifetime for a young boy. 

One extra note: I appreciated how the author blended in some reality
issues such as, the boy ejaculating almost immediately the first time,
and later, the girl having a period.

3 kisses

***

Cream:

The main problem with this story is the writing and the organization.
I can really believe this was written by a 15-year-old high school
student.  Problem is, the story is supposed to be narrated by someone
older and wiser.  But I really did enjoy the two main characters and
the sex.  I agree, Peaches, the story could use some trimming, but
more than that it needs a good polishing and better organization. And
we need more to keep us reading than just the promise of sex.
Although the whole story is really an extended flashback, the author
misses a good bet: he should have started the story with the girl's
wedding and mixed scenes of history with scene of the present.  Maybe
just a few scenes of the present.  And if he really wanted to be
naughty, he'd let us learn only at the very end that he's the groom.
But even without that kind of twist or that kind of structure, this
story really needs something to keep us from nodding off.

The girl gets 5 kisses
the sex gets 4 kisses
the guy gets 3 kisses, and
the writing gets 1 kiss.  
Average: 3.5 kisses  (For you math majors, here's a tip: girls and sex
are more important than guys and writing.)

***

Peaches:

Obviously, you like the girl a lot more than I do. Maybe she fits
right into a fantasy from your youth? I think that just might be the
selling point for this story. It's a fantasy come to life.

Sex is more important than writing? 

***

Peaches: 3 kisses
Cream: 3.5 kisses

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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