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From: "Highlander JM" <highlanderjm@hotmail.com>
Subject: {ASSM} (NEW!) "Island Paradise: Revisited"  Part 20
Date: Mon, 31 Dec 2001 07:10:05 -0500
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(IPR-X-20.TXT)

____________________________________________________________

Story Name: "Island Paradise: Revisited" (Part 20 of ??) -
               M/F, F/F & just about everything else
_____________________________________________________________


   As I stood atop the ledge of the highest cliff on the
island, I looked down and watched the ocean's waves crash
into the large boulders embedded there.  There was a good
3,000 feet separating myself and rock bottom, but I felt
somewhat at ease surrounded by the red sky as twilight
settled in. For the first time since yesterday, at least.
Why?  This was the end of the road for me.

   Since Pamela left my life forever less than 24 hours ago,
I had given a lot of thought to everything which took place
over the past seven months.  Perhaps she was right, and I
had been too blind to even see the most obvious things.
   During the summer-time, there was such a feeling of
camaraderie amongst the girls.  Pamela, Lindsay, Amy, Torrie,
Trish, Lisa and Christina - all of them, for the most part,
got along so wonderfully.  There was such a sense of love
and sharing amongst that group, until Trish ultimately had
her disagreement over Lindsay with Amy near the end.
   I did not count that, however, because mostly everything
before that had went so beautifully.
   Of course, I wanted to re-create those happy feelings
when bringing Torrie, Amy and Trish back to the island for
the winter, along with newcomers Cassidy, Stephanie and
Devon.  They were to join Lindsay, Pamela and myself - and
my goal was to not have a single problem between any of us.
   But there had really been nothing but minor squabbles and
heated arguments amongst the ladies since the winter began.
First, it was Torrie and Amy - not so much of an argument,
but simmering, bitter feelings between the two.  Torrie was
angry at Amy, thinking she had lured her into the porn
industry while not caring about her one bit.  Torrie said
that Amy only did it for her own good.
   Then, of course, Torrie had her series of meltdowns once
she learned that Trish was coming back to the island.
Torrie finally thought she had a chance to get in with
Lindsay - her secret crush in life - but knew that went
out the window once Trish - Lindsay's favorite lady - made
her triumphant return to the island.
   Who could forget Devon and my suspicions about her?  I
thought she had her sights set on harming my marriage with
Pamela, and I came within an eyelash of sending her home
because of it.  I had a nice, long talk with her, though,
and we ironed everything out.
   There was the infamous night when Pamela basically beat
Devon up too, and bloodied her in the process.  Pamela was
afraid that Devon was out to end our marriage as well (which
I found quite peculiar now, considering what happened here
yesterday), thanks to Cassidy and her false rumors.
   Things between Devon and Pamela were eventually smoothed
out, but the complications of that evening still seemed to
linger between them until the very end.  Of course, I sent
Cassidy - who admitted to being a compulsive liar - home
without even a second thought.
   Things kind of exploded once Pamela snapped at Lindsay -
of all people - telling her that she wanted to spend the
evening alone with Trish.  The end result of the discussion
between Pamela and Trish was that I no longer had a wife,
because Lindsay's soulmate had run off to Canada with her.

   Just a single thought about the horrific events of
yesterday sent absolute shivers down my spine.  While
standing atop that cliff which overlooked the ocean, I
watched a flock of seagulls drift by.  What was it like, I
thought to myself, to be able to fly so freely?

   Of course, here I stood - a shell of the man I was just
24 hours ago.  My wife had left me for another woman, and I
didn't even see it coming.  I was too blind, too naive.  My
ex-fiancee, Victoria... she left me for another woman, too.
   I never thought I could have had a more worse, pitiful
feeling than I did when Victoria left me standing at the
altar some eight years ago.  However, Pamela saying that
my marriage with her was nothing more than a mistake and
then her leaving me for another woman - just like Victoria
did - the feelings within me were a million times worse.
   Dear, sweet, little Lindsay... she had not stopped crying
since the events of yesterday.  I felt terrible for her
because Trish had stabbed her in the back, and then ripped
her heart out again - just like in the summer-time.  Lindsay
deserved nothing bad to happen to her.  Seeing her in pain
only added to my own pain...
   What I once thought of as island paradise had suddenly
been transformed into an island of bickering and horror.
Arguments and problems were abound since the winter began,
and then that absolute bomb was dropped yesterday.
   I had worked so hard to promote a feeling of togetherness
and love amongst the girls... but failed.  Even where what I
once thought of as my "save haven" in life - this island - I
had failed.  I felt so sick inside that it actually hurt.
   I took a deep breath while watching one of the waves
crash into the series of thick, jagged rocks below me.  The
sounds being created were peaceful, but I knew what I was
debating in my mind right now was anything but.

   "Jump," I said to myself.

   Why not?  Pamela had tore my heart out and sent it through
a meat grinder with what she did to me yesterday.  It was bad
enough that Pamela left.  It was even worse when she claimed
she never really loved me in the first place.  Our marriage,
in her own words, was a mistake.
   "Jump," I told myself again.  "Do it."
   Without me to ruin her life, Lindsay would be with her
family right now in Ohio.  She would be a college student
and, of course, the most popular co-ed on campus.  Lindsay
would be leading a much happier life if I had never brought
her here, and ruined it for her.  She wouldn't have had to
go through all this bickering and heartache.
   She would have never met Trish, and her life would be
better now because of it.
   "Jump, you loser," I said, getting more and more agitated
with myself.  "End it.  End it now.  Jump!"
   If I were to take a swan-dive off of that 3,000 foot
cliff, I would leave Lindsay and the other remaining girls -
Amy, Torrie, Devon and Stephanie - behind.
   "They'll find their way," I summarized outloud.  "All it
will take is a call to the mainland authorities."
   Of course, the main reason why I was contemplating suicide
at this very moment in time was because of the extreme pain
and hurt which had flooded my body.  I just couldn't live
like this.  I gave everything that I could possibly give to
Pamela - and she said our marriage had been a mistake.
   I shook my head while looking downward.  There was no
need to have a second thought about Pamela, or anything else
that happened to me.  It was too painful, and not worth my
time.  None of this, in fact, was worth my time.
   "Jump.  You'll be in a better place because of it.  End
the pain.  No one will care that you did it, anyway."
   I closed my eyes and prepared to do the unthinkable...

                           * * *

   "JEREMY!"

   The loud, deafening scream sounded like a firecracker had
just went off.  "JEREMY!"  Opening my eyes and taking a step
back from the ledge, I turned around and noticed Lindsay
running toward me as fast as she could.  "JEREMY..." she
said once in front of me, leaning over and holding onto her
knees, trying to catch her breath.
   "What are you doing here, Lindsay?" I asked her, angry.
I was too irrational to feel otherwise.
   "I... f-found you... with the voyeur room," she replied,
still short of breath.  "Whew... what a run.  Where have you
been all day?  We've been worried si-sick!"
   "What are you doing here?" I reiterated, my arms folded.
   "Oh my God..." Lindsay said, looking up at me and shaking
her head.  "You were going to do it.  Weren't you?"  She
paused and added, "You were going to... jump."
   I held back a laugh and countered, "So?  It's not like
anyone is going to miss me."
   "I'd miss you, Jeremy," the 19-year-old said, reaching
out and lightly grasping my wrist with her hand.
   "No you wouldn't," I told her, my mind too hazed to think
straight.  "No you wouldn't.  No one would."
   "How can you say that, Jeremy?" she asked, looking hurt.
   "Maybe because it's the truth?" I told her.  "No one
cares what happens to me.  No one ever has.  First it was
Victoria, and now Pamela.  No one cares."
   "I'm not Victoria or Pamela," Lindsay countered, shaking
her head in the process.  "I'd never hurt you, Jeremy."
   "I thought the same way about them," I said, turning my
face to the side.  "I thought I was going to grow old with
Victoria.  We were going to have kids, a happy family.  But
it never happened.  Pamela?  We were going to spend the rest
of our lives together in paradise.  A beautiful, tropical
paradise.  I loved her.  But she simply tolerated me.  Our
marriage, she said... it was a MISTAKE."
   "I love you, Jeremy," Lindsay shrieked, tears forming in
her eyes.  "I'd never do a thing to hurt you..."
   "Go back to the mansion, Lindsay, and let me do what I
have to do," I told her bluntly, my mind still too whacked.
"The pain will be gone.  I'll be in a better place."
   The little blonde looked at me for several seconds, and
then started to cry.  Still too intent on what I wanted to
do myself, I did not pay her a lot of attention.  I turned
my face to look back down at the rocks thousands of feet
below, but then got a rather harsh wake-up call.

   Lindsay grabbed ahold of my shoulders and steered me
away from the ledge, then extended her right hand and
slapped me across the face as hard as she possibly could.

   "DAMNIT, JEREMY!" she exploded, my eyes wide in response.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?  Look at what happened to
me, will you?"  She punched my shoulder and continued, "Look
at what happened to me!  NOT ONLY DID I LOSE TRISH, BUT I
ALSO LOST PAMELA!  In the same day!  I LOVED TRISH SO MUCH,
AND PAMELA WAS MY SECOND-FAVORITE AMONGST THE GIRLS!  I've
spent nearly seven months of my life with Pamela!  MY GOD,
JEREMY... YOU LOST YOUR WIFE, BUT I LOST TWO PEOPLE!  I'M
NOT STANDING AT A CLIFF, READY TO JUMP OFF!"

   I was too stunned to even say anything in response to her.
I had NEVER seen Lindsay so harsh and angry before...

   "I can't stop you," she said seconds later, her voice much
more calm and relaxed.  "Not physically, at least.  But if
you jump, Jeremy... I'll follow you down.  I'll jump, too."
   "WHAT?" I managed to get out, taken completely off-guard.
   "I'm not losing the three most important people in my
life, in less than a 24 hour span," she replied, starting to
cry again.  "Pamela and Trish were bad enough.  But... I
can't lose you too, Jeremy.  It would destroy me.  I... I
couldn't handle that.  I... just couldn't."

   Lindsay's slap to my face, followed by her punch upon my
shoulder and then those powerful words...  Fortunately, she
had managed to bring back my sanity.  And, there wasn't a
better time for her to pound some sense into me than now...

   "I'll jump right after you do," she reiterated, shaking
her head through a sheet of tears.  "I love you, Jeremy.  I
love you more than anything.  I haven't always said or
expressed that as much as I'd like, because Pamela was your
wife and I didn't want to cause friction."  Lindsay shook
her head once more and started crying even harder.  "I'm not
losing you too, Jeremy.  I'll go to Heaven or Hell with you,
either way.  You jump... and I jump."
   "I love you too, sweetheart," I told her after several
seconds of silence.  Finally, I had regained my mind.  "I...
you... you saved my life."
   "I know how much it h-hurts..." Lindsay cried, stepping
forward and hugging me.  She jammed the side of her face
into my chest and continued, "I feel it just like you d-do,
Jeremy.  Pamela was your wife, but Trish was a wife to me.
I lost her, and Pamela too.  Pamela was... my best friend."
   Lindsay broke off our embrace and looked into my eyes,
saying, "B-But you know wh-what?  Even though both of them
stabbed us in the back... we'll make it through.  You and
me, Jeremy.  We'll do it... t-together."
   As the 19-year-old's cries reached their apex, it was if
her legs had given out underneath her.  Lindsay crumpled to
the ground, and I went down with her.  I hugged her tightly
and started to cry myself.  "As long as I am with you, sweet
thing... yes, we'll make it through," I said.  "Together..."
   Lindsay and I cried together, embracing one another
tightly, for a good ten minutes.  At the same time, I openly
wondered to myself if this was the person - Lindsay - that I
should have been with from the very beginning.

   Lindsay saved my life...


                  <<<- End of Part 20 ->>>


---------------------------------------
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   http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/HighlanderJM/

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