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From: "T Bone" <terb02@lycos.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} Revolution {terb02} (f/M fdom inc? spank) [1/1]
Date: Sun, 30 Dec 2001 00:10:09 -0500
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In silence I sat on the sofa with my 15 year-old daughter, 
neither of us moving or speaking, my eyes not daring to look 
away from the TV screen where the unrecorded portion of the 
videotape was playing itself out.  The tape which my wife 
had left for us to watch.

We were sitting side by side but not touching.  At some point
Kimmie had drawn her legs up onto the sofa.  Now she sat there
quietly in her cut-offs, hugging her bare knees to her chin.
I seem to have shrunk into my clothes next to her, drawing away 
guiltily as we had watched the scenes unfold.

Little more than an hour earlier she had called me at the 
office to ask that I come home.  She wouldn't tell me what it 
was over the phone but insisted that I get there as soon as 
possible.  I left immediately, asking Flo to cancel my
afternoon appointments and my raquetball with Dave at the club.

Kimmie met me in the living room with my jacket still draped 
over my shoulder and my tie barely loosened.  She had a strange 
look on her face.  "Mommy has left," she said.

"What do you mean 'left'?  And why are you here instead of
in school today, young lady?"

"Mommy said she needed to keep me home today," explaining her 
informal attire.  "And she's gone.  She took Jeffrey with her.  
Oh Daddy, I'm so afraid!"

I could see she was trembling and took her in my arms, while
turning over her strange news in my mind.  Left? gone?  Surely 
she couldn't mean that Vivian was deserting us!  So gone where?
And why had she taken our son along? 

But I wouldn't be able to coax any explanation out of Kimmie
in her present state.  "There, there," I held her tight, swaying 
back and forth like when I was a new father and she was the 
sweet baby I had first sung lullabies to.  Just as then, she 
finally calmed down, her shoulders heaving in one last sob 
before she lay quietly against me.

"Do you love me, Daddy?  Will you always love me?"

"Of course, Kimmie.  You're my darling little girl and I will 
always love you forever and ever, no matter what."

Seeming reassured, she slowly drew away from me.  Taking a
deep breath she turned, then walked over to the coffee table
and picked up a package.

"Mommy left this.  She said we should watch it so we can 
understand.  How things have changed.  She said it would explain 
everything."

So we had watched it, and now everything was changed.  

As I had absorbed Vivian's words, as she had stripped and laid
bare the intimate secrets of our relationship for an audience 
that included our daugher, as I had witnessed the scenes with 
her and Jeffrey and the others, I was overcome with shock and
horror -- and desire.  I was stunned and aroused at the same
time.  Some sickness awakened within me that welcomed this
humiliation, that conspired and reveled in the ruination of
my life.

But not quite everything had changed, not quite yet!  There
was still one further step.  And it was like a step over a cliff, 
for once it was taken it could never be reversed.  And if I 
threw myself off the cliff, would Kimmie come to my rescue?

We didn't look at each other, yet the tension between us was
palpable.  Heavens knew what thoughts were going through her
mind.

But the tension within me seemed even greater.  I was her father, 
her protector, the guarantor of her stability.  The sole guarantor
after what Vivian had done.  Yet now it seemed like a few words 
from me could destroy that role forever.  It was my duty, I told 
myself, to pull myself together, to try to restore some semblance 
of sanity and normalcy for the two of us who were left, to speak 
the words that would reassure my poor child.  

But my lust offered the fulfillment of my deepest desires against 
which sanity and normalcy were just synonyms for frustration and 
cowardice.  My lust spoke in my wife's voice with her trace of
contempt.  I felt I would inevitably choose the cowardly route, 
but I sat there paralyzed, clinging to my fantasy, unable to do 
the safe thing just yet.

I realized that I was quivering, almost convulsive, no longer
in control of myself or able to make rational decisions.  Then 
it's like something in me snapped and started making decisions
for me.  I was like an observer in my own body watching it do
things that I could never do.

Kimmie sat beside me quietly, sighing every now and then, not
speaking but waiting almost expectantly for what would come next.

Shakily, I stood up and turned around to face her.  She stared
back at me with an expression I could not read.  I lowered my
eyes, then unfastened my belt with trembling fingers and let my 
trousers drop to the floor.

"Kimmie.  I want you to spank me."

Silence.  

She pouted while considering, her eyes never leaving my face.  
I could feel my face reddening under her gaze, and lowered my 
head again.  Then she unclasped her knees and slid her feet off 
the sofa.  Her voice was a husky whisper when she finally spoke.

"Yes, Daddy,"  bending forward.  "I think," as she caught the
fabric of my boxers, "that I would like that," and she slowly
tugged me towards her lap.



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