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From: "Stasya T. Canine" <stasya.nospam@counsellor.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} We Moved as One - Man and His Muse Series (M/Muse zoo/best) Stasya T. Canine
Date: Sun, 16 Dec 2001 06:10:12 -0500
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We Moved as One
Part of the 'Man and his Muse' series
by: Stasya T. Canine
---

"We moved as One."  I shrug slightly, laugh softly, somewhat
cynically at my presumption--and turn to face the other half of 'we'.
I raise my eyebrows in a silent question.

"Indeed."  Mahika twitches her ears into what I know is part of her
way of showing her inner amusement.  "Now convey the true miracle of
something *we* consider routine--to those who only *think* they have
experienced it."

"Bitch."  The epithet is routine and only one way I have of telling
her I love her.  Sometimes the feelings are so deep that only an
insult will serve to convey those depths.

"Writer."  Her lupine lips peel back into a grin of victory.

I nod my head slightly and grin back.  "A true touch."

Mahika tilts her head slightly.  The game is an old one between us
and she knows I'm not finished.  I let the silence lengthen before I
gently touch my lips to her nose as I hug her.  Without loosening my
hold or shifting my contact from her nose I manage my final comment
just before I can't contain my laughter.  "Muse!"

For the next hour, what we spoke of needed no words between us.  
Anyone who chanced to see us would have wondered at our silence and
lack of urgency.  For two who openly avow a deep love for each other,
I have to admit we often seem indifferent or unaware of it.

Inevitably, we wound up sprawled on the bed, a carefully intertwined
tangle of limbs that had as its primary focus the obvious placement
of my penis inside her warn, receptive vagina.  A secondary but
important connection was her tongue as it wandered within my mouth.  
Even so, the physical was a pale reflection of the emotional reality.

We moved as One.

* * *

Later, once I was settled in my chair and ready to return to my
seemingly impossible task, I glanced sidelong at the bitch who was
next to my left elbow.  "I won't even try to tell them."

One eye opened to watch me.

"Who invented 'The Bardic Way'?"  I smiled as she sat up in surprise.

"For once, I don't see..."  She chopped her words off and I could
see she'd finally realized what I was planning on doing.  "Of course!"

I turned back to the computer.  "Mahika, for a Muse, sometimes you
can be far too human."

I felt her chin on my shoulder.  "For a human, you can be
infuriatingly frustrating.  I'm going to enjoy this one.  Type!"

"Yes, oh infuriated one, whom I love."  I didn't need to see her
grin to know it was as feral as my own.

* * *

Journey with me, my neighbors, as we visit the past.  It's *our*
past, when we had nothing more than an unknowable future together.

"Stasya T. Canine, I'm your lover, not an enemy you must hammer into
submission."

"Huh?"  I froze in shock and went limp.

Mahika's lips touched mine in a gentle kiss.  "Lover.  Ask.  Move
with me, not in spite of me."

"I don't understand."

"I know."  I opened my eyes to see tears on her face.

Two words, spoken through tears--and I was devastated.  Even though
we hadn't been together that long, I recognized that she was telling
me I didn't understand something about being lovers instead of sex
partners.

We were both silent a long time.  Finally her arms went around me
and held me while I cried in frustration.  "Stasya, when are you
going to admit how we feel about each other--and make love *with*
me?"  She let go, rolled me over to my stomach, straddled me and then
began a gentle massage.  "I'm touching your soul.  Admit it to
yourself and let yours touch mine."  She paused and then ran her
fingers lightly along my spine.  "It won't hurt.  I promise."

I stiffened as understanding arrived.  "It's not your love that I
fear."

She resumed the massage while she waited for me to speak again.  I
knew she would wait for me to find the words I wanted.

I was almost asleep before I said the words I'd held back ever since
I'd felt the first tendrils of something I thought I'd never feel for
someone else, again.  "I'm tired of giving, only to lose all--after I
give.  I don't want to feel that pain anymore."

"Ah."  Her whisper was filled with the tones of someone who had
suddenly discovered the missing  key that unlocked the door to
understanding.  "A Muse, and I never suspected the depths of your
pain.  I didn't understand that your love for me is greater than mine
for you."

She rolled me over and restraddled me.  There was no sexual intent,
only a warm contact that spoke of other things.  "Look at me, read me
as you've never read me, and understand."

"I am a Muse.  My life is tied to yours no matter who, or what you
are.  Yes, I can break those ties if I wish.  Is that what you fear?"

"No."  I closed my eyes in pain.  "We both know that what I am was
well established before you asked me to be your partner.  I could
live with the loss of your companionship, as a Muse."  I sought the
words I needed.  "That's what makes me hold back.  Don't ask me how I
knew it, but somehow I've always felt that in some ways you defined
yourself through your relationship with me.  You *needed* me.  If
there's one thing that terrifies me and stops me from letting myself
love someone, that's it.  I didn't know that was what was going on
until now.  You needed to force me to realize what I was doing--and
that I was doing it because I love you as deeply as I've ever loved
anyone else."

Mahika's smile was wan.  "I didn't know I was doing it.  Further, I
would have denied it.  Muses *are* and we only know that we need to
be with someone who can understand our needs and respond to them." 
She lowered her head and whispered:  "I never thought a mortal would
see those needs and my dependency as a barrier to love."

I opened my eyes to study her.  It hadn't occurred to me that this
was something she wouldn't have known about.  I thought long and hard
before I responded gently:  "Perhaps it is because I am used to
linking my life to lovers who are destined to die before I do.  I
have been forced to accept the mortality of my lovers.  They are
also, by the nature of the world we live in, forced to be dependent
on me to a degree I find so distasteful that I do everything I can to
reduce that dependency."

I pulled Mahika down to me and kissed her gently before pulling away
slightly.  "Mahika, I am not so arrogant as to think I could have
done *all* of what I have done on my own, without your help.  You've
challenged me and made me find the courage to walks paths that I
would have never discovered without your help.  But, until you
mentioned it tonight, I didn't realize we weren't really true lovers.
I didn't know I was treating you as an adversary rather than a lover."

I saw her nod slowly.  "I never suspected that my 'need' for you and
your efforts would make you hold back your love because you
unconsciously saw me as 'inadequate'."  She kissed me hungrily before
she pulled back and trailed her fingers down my chest.  "I thought I
loved you.  That 'love' pales beside the love and 'need' I have for
you now.  Even a Muse may learn new things about herself."

We reached for each other, merged our bodies and then...

We moved as One.
---

Stasya T. Canine and Mahika
November 24, 2001

---

"Give a minute...
   Give the gift of friendship to a stranger."
     --Stasya T. Canine, September 14, 2001--
~~~
http://storiesonline.net/Stasya_T_Canine
http://www.furnation.com/Nikkolai - Furry, general audience

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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