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From: "Canyonero" <prefectbert@excite.com>
Reply-To: "Canyonero" <prefectbert@excite.com>
Subject: {ASSM} Slide-All (MF)
Date: Wed, 12 Dec 2001 22:10:06 -0500
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Warning - The following story contains a door-to-door saleman

Slide-All (MF)

I rang the doorbell.  I waited patiently and tried not to fidget.
It's always best to appear confident in front of the customer.

The house was just like all the other houses in the tract.  Three
bedrooms, two car garage, one and a half baths.  Suburbia, USA.

The wood door opened with an annoying squeak.

An attractive brunette woman appeared before me.  She looked about
25-years old with straight shoulder-length hair and attractive green
eyes that made you want to gaze into them.  She wore a light buttoned
blue blouse and a matching wraparound skirt that came down to just
below her knees.  She probably just got off work, I surmised.  I
noticed her B-sized tits that stood out firmly.  Full and pert. Her
attractiveness startled me and I had to force myself to refocus on the
reason I was here - my job.

"Good afternoon, ma'am," I said as I started my spiel, "I'm here to
introduce you to Slide-All, the most amazing lubrication product ever
on the market.  Much better..."

"Excuse me...," she interrupted, sounding perturbed.

"Much better than WD-40 or...," I continued on.

"Didn't you see the 'No Soliciting' sign?"

Undeterred, I answered, "Then you wouldn't have had a chance to know
about the amazing Slide-All."  I opened up my shoulder bag and pulled
it out.  It looked very much like a toothpaste tube, but twice the
size and a more narrow opening.  I opened the tip and squirted a few
drops on her door hinges.

"Listen to this," I said.  I moved the door back and forth.  It was
completely silent.

"Very impressive," she said, sounding unimpressed.  "Please go away."

She sounded sad to me.  I looked into her face and tried not to gaze
to long in those mesmerizing green eyes.   I wasn't sure if it was
the sun, but her eyes looked watery.

"Have a hard day?" I said, in my professional salesman feigned concern
voice.

"Yes."

"Could I talk to the Mister?" I said in sudden changed tactics.

"There is no 'Mister'"

I could feel a potential sale, ever one's a potential sale after all,
slipping away, but I wasn't ready to give up.  Sales are done by
persistence.

"So what do you do?" I asked, looking for points of commonality with
a prospective customer.

"I'm a teacher."

I was quick on my feet with a joke.

"Well, Slide-All can make your door silent, but it can't make your
kids silent," I laughed.  "So what do you teach?"

My joke only returned a grimace from her.

"Eight grade english," she said.  "Now could you leave?"

"Tough grade."  I said, in purposeful ignorance of her request.
"Tough kids."

"Most of them are good," she defended.

"Something happen today at school?"

She stared at me as if to ask "Why do you keep asking questions, you
don't really care?".

"Alright, Mr Salesman," she said.

"Hogan, John Hogan," I quickly interrupted.  "And your name?"

"Alison Rogers," she said.  "Alright, Mr. Hogan, if it will make you
go away.  One of my students was mad and he told me to 'go stick a
ruler up your ass'.  Happy now?"

"And this was offensive to you?" I asked.

Her face looked startled.

"What?" she said.

"It sounds like the boy has a crush on you."

She looked at me like I was crazy.  "You're crazy," she said.

"Allow me," I said.

I took a step forward and she took a natural defensive step backwards,
and then I was in a prospective customer's house, an important phase
in making the sale.  I slipped past her into her house.  To my right,
I saw a dining room table with some of her school papers.  I also saw
a foot long plastic ruler on it.  Probably, the very one the boy
commented about.  I veered to the table, picked up the ruler, and
went into her living room.  I sat on one end of the couch and put my
Slide-All product bag next to it.

She followed.

"Mr. Hogan," she said irritated.

"Ms. Rogers," I said, "Please have a seat."

I directed her to the other end of her couch in her own home.

"Well, Ms. Rogers, did you know that Slide-All is the first multi-
purpose lubricant that is completely safe to all types of biology
whether plants, animals, or people?"

She looked at me blankly.

"That makes Slide-All the first all-purpose lubricant.  It replaces
all other lubricants you have in your house which saves storage space
and this little tube..." I held it up. "...lasts a year with average
use."

"Okay," she said, as if she didn't understand my point, nor that she
cared.

"So let's see about this ruler thing."  I slid rapidly over to her on
the couch.  I had a tube of Slide-All and the ruler with me."

"Mr. Hogan!" she said in surprise and began to stand up.

I put my hand quickly on her thigh and she sat back down with my
slight encouragement.

"Please allow me to spend the time to demonstrate the superior
qualities of Slide-All," I insisted.

"Um..."

"I am positive that Slide-All can even show that your student's
comment was a compliment."

"Oh, really!" she said in disbelief.

"I think the boy is uninformed, but allow me."  I put a hand on her
waist and on her back.

"Please turn over, Ms. Rogers." I pulled and pushed on her body.

"What are you doing?" she protested, but she turned for me.

"Turn lengthwise," I said.  I slid down a little to give her room on
the couch.

She rested on her elbows on the arm of the couch and she was up on
her knees.

"This in most unconventional," she said, "And I'm very tired from my
day."

"Well, Slide-All is not an ordinary product.  It is not conventional,
it is revolutionary."

"Can't your company just make an infomerical?"

"And sell it like a cheap pocket fisherman?  This product is so good
we bring it to the people.  It must be seen to be believed."

"So Ms. Rogers," I said, "you are a very attractive woman.  I'm
positive from looking at you that it's common for the boys to spend
some extra time in the bathroom stalls during the break between
classes.  Otherwise, they walk around awkwardly and painfully during
the day.

She said nothing, but just looked back at me with annoyance on her
face.

I flipped up her skirt onto her back.  She wore generic department
store-brand white panties.

"I'm not sure this is proper," she said.

"Don't worry," I replied.  "Slide-All is a wonderful product.

I put my fingers into her elastic and deftly pulled her panties down.

"You have a very nice firm ass," I observed.

"Well, I do workout," she responded.

"I can tell," I complimented.

I poked the ruler at her asshole and she flinched in her response.

"Mr...!"

"Now obviously," I quickly said, "this won't go up your ass, right?"

"Uh...er...yes," she said, relieved.

"You don't actually believe it will, do you?" I asked, to obtain
certainty of her own opinion.

"No, I don't."

"I agree.  I'm going to put a few drops of Slide-All on your asshole
now."

I quickly put a some drops on her asshole before she could speak.

"Oh," she said in surprise when she felt it.

"Now just rubbing it in."  My thumb touched her hole and I started
to rub it in small circles.  She recoiled and tensed at first, but
then later relaxed as I continued.

"There," I said,  "Well, rubbed in."  I heard her exhale when I
stopped.

I picked up the ruler again and lightly poked her asshole with it
again.

"Now obviously even Slide-All, the world's best lubricant, won't let
a ruler go up your ass.  A ruler is not made to go up an ass.  Would
you still agree, Ms. Rogers?"

"Yes," she said.  "I would still agree."  She didn't sound so angry
now.  Her voice sounded almost sultry, though I think I imagined it.
Perhaps I would make a sale after all.

"Now most eighth grade boys are immature and ignorant.  They are
just beginning to understand about sex and are completely driven by
hormones, but they have no idea that a ruler will not fit up an ass.
They are young and stupid.  Following me?"

"Er...?"  she said.

"The boy in your class today innately knows the pleasure of the ass
and is naturally aroused by yours, but doesn't know how to properly
express it.  He's stupid."

While I talked, I put several drops of Slide-All on my right index
finger.

"Do you consider your ass sexy?" I asked.

"Well, I..."

"Because it is,"  I just rambled on in salesman speak without
realization that I rarely let her formulate an answer.  It's all
about the sale.

"Your ass is very sexy and the boy wasn't smart enough to say
something proper like 'Teacher, I'd like to stick my finger into your
ass'."

I easily slid my finger into her ass.  Her response was to exhale in
surprise.

"Can you see how this might be the case?" I said with my finger all
the way inserted in her ass.

"I really don't think the boy meant..."

I slid my finger outward which interrupted her words.  With that
interruption, I spoke again like any salesman loves to do.

"Your student's remark has given me the perfect opportunity to
demonstrate the biological compatiblity of Slide-All to you."  I
started to slowly slide my finger in her ass.  "You see, not only can
Slide-All replace such lubricants as WD-40 and 3-in-1 Household oil,
but it makes obsolete such products as KY and AstroGlide.  All this
in one little tube."

"It does appeared to be an amazing product after all," she groaned.

"So you see how easily my finger can slide in your ass?"

"Well, not actually see," she said.  She paused as her body had a
slight tremor.  "But I can feel it.  Does it allow you to go faster?"

"Certainly, Ms. Rogers," I said.  I moved my finger in her ass
quicker.  "Would you like to buy the product?"  I tried to close
the sale.

"Another question," she said.  It appeared that she had to really
concentrate to speak.

"Of course," I replied.  I'd answer as many questions as was
necessary to make the sale.

"If I have a tight place and I need to squeeze a large thing in to
it, can your product do it?"

"Oh, yes," I happily replied, "Slide-All can help squeeze things into
the tightest of places."

"Would you demonstrate?" she said.

"Certainyly, I can demonstrate, Ms. Rogers."

"I just need to know if Slide-All is truly all the product you say
it is, Mr. Hogan."

"You appear to have a very tight place right here," I observed.

"Yes," she said, "that is where I would like you to demonstrate."

I pulled my finger out of her ass, unbuttoned my pants, and pushed
down my underwear.

"I'm just going to put some more drops of Slide-All on your tight
place and then rub some Slide-All on the object I am going to insert
into it."

She turned her body and looked back.  "That looks like a very large
object to put in such a tight place."  She smiled.

"I assure you that Slide-All is an amazing product."

"You keep saying that, Mr Hogan," she said with urgency, "but you
still haven't demonstrated if it actually works."

I hastily rubbed it on my cock and her ass.  I lined up my cock to
her asshole and started to push in.

"Is this a tight place that has had large objects placed in it
before?" I inquired to the prospective customer.

"Only small objects and that was unsatisfactory," she answered.  She
grunted as her anal ring started to open for my pushing cock.

"Ow!" she cried.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I've never...the tight place has never been stretched like this
before, so it hurt briefly, but please keep demonstrating."

"Are you experiencing first hand what Slide-All can do for you?"

"Oh, yes," she practically purred.

She pushed back on me and my cock slid into her.

"Ahhhhhhhh, that's better," she said.

"So you can see..."

"Feel," she interrupted.

"Er...yes, feel," I said.  "You now know Slide-All is an excellent
lubricant."

"and one hundred percent biologically safe, right?" she replied
with part of my spiel.

"Exactly," I said.

"But how easy is it for this large object to move around in this
tight place?  Can you show me?"

I slowly moved my cock inside her ass.  I never pulled my cock head
past her anal ring.  I moved easily inside her.

"As you can see...tell, Ms. Rogers..."

"I think it is better if you call me Alison now, John," she
interrupted.  "After all, your cock is now in my ass."

"Uh, yes," I said.

"Please continue, John."

"I can easily move the large object in the tight place.  Is this
satisfactory to your expectations, Alison?

"Perhaps," she moaned, "but I was wondering if there might be an
additional lubricant placed in my ass... I mean the tight place."

"There is, but it is not something manufactured by Slide-All
Industries," I explained.

"But if Slide-All allows that additional lubricant to be manufactured,
even though it is indirect, isn't that a benifit of your product."

"Why certainly," I said "I would agree with you."

"Then," she growled sensually at me, "why don't you get serious about
your demonstration and fuck my ass."

I had no response to that.  Well, no verbal response to that.   I
put my hands on her waist and started to thrust harder and faster into
her ass.

She began to moan and arch her back and then thrust her ass back at
me.

"Oh, yes!  Oh, shit!" she moaned.  "Harder, harder."

I fucked harder.

"I'm coming," I cried.

"OHHHHHH!" she cried, as she came and her body shook.

I exploded inside her.  My come...my additional lubricant shot into
her ass.

She collapsed down and I collapsed down on top of her.  My limp cock
head lay just inside her anal ring just waiting to be pulled out.

"So," I said, as I laid on top of her and tried to catch my breath,
"Would you like to purchase some Slide-All?"

She took a moment to catch her own breath.

"Sorry, no sale.  I need you to come back tomorrow and make another
sales presentation."


THE END.

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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