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Message-ID: <33710asstr$1006902607@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: jimmy@jimmy-hat.com (Jimmy Hat)
Subject: {ASSM} Maytag, Where Are You? 2/3 (MMF MFF bond best?)  
Date: Tue, 27 Nov 2001 18:10:07 -0500
Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail
Approved: <assm@asstr-mirror.org>
Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d

Once they alighted, Maytag and Stanton found that there was
indeed a large farmhouse to the garage with a sign that read,
"Bed and Breakfast". Earl mumbled something and pointed at the
car and at the house. 

"I guess we should bring our stuff inside the house," Stanton
said. 

"Resh resh," Earl mumbled. 

Inside, they found Ted and the girls sitting in a parlor just
inside the door. Flower patterned upholstery lined the chairs and
sofa, and a white doily covered the center of a cherry wood
coffee table. Framed needlepoint decorated the walls. 

"Looks like Earl's back," Ted said. 

"That's right," Maytag said. "He's pulling our car into the
garage next to your van?" 

"Still raining?" Dymphna asked. 

"Coming down in buckets," Stanton said. 

"We better put on those parkas, then," Thelma said. 

Dymphna and Thelma threw the covers over their clothes and walked
out the door. 

"What's that all about, Ted?" Stanton asked, taking a seat on the
sofa next to the big blonde. 

"Oh, they're just trying to find out from Earl what all this is
going to cost us, how to arrange payment. Boring stuff." 

"Is that so?" Maytag asked. "How do you usually arrange--" 

"Look, Sloop," Shagger called, interrupting Maytag, "Ted and
Feds! Get it? Ted and Feds!" Slouching, Shagger walked into 
the room carrying arms full of lunchmeat and a
loaf of bread. The dog carried a long pepperoni in its mouth. 

"Shagger, you can't just go in the kitchen and take from this
man," Ted said. 

"I thought--" he looked at Maytag and Stanton then back to Ted.
"Sorry, Ted. But, like, I got hungry. Right, Sloop?" 

The dog settled on the floor and began to devour the meat. 

Shagger held his palms out at the graphic display of hunger.
"See, Ted?" 

"Sloop Dog, no!" Ted called. He reached down to grab the food.
The great Dane was having none of it, however. The beast bounded
off with the pepperoni. 

"Sloop!" Shagger called. 

All four chased the dog back into the kitchen. The hound lost
traction on the floor, and slid along, into an open doorway. It
dropped from view, and a loud crashing sound echoed into the
room. 

"Like, he fell down the stairs!" Shagger exclaimed. 

They rushed to the open doorway, worried for the dog. They found
him at the bottom of the stairs, licking his wounds. After
hurrying down the steps, though, they saw he was eating the
pepperoni. 

"That's our dog!" Ted said, proudly. 

"Like you had me worried there for a second, Sloop," Shagger
said, giving the dog a scratch behind the ears. 

"Hey, look at that!" Stanton said, pointing at a workbench.
"Wigs." 

"They look just like Earl's hair," Ted said. 

"Like, maybe the old guy's bald," Shagger joked. 

"Does his face need covering, too?" Maytag asked, holding up a
fake mustache. 

"This could be some kind of clue," Ted said, holding his chin. 

"Guys!" a distant voice called. "Where are you?" 

"We'd better get back upstairs. C'mon, Sloop!" 

The foursome scrambled up the stairs, with the dog leaping three
or four steps at a time behind them. In the kitchen, the girls
stood in their raincoats, dripping water on the floor. "There you
are!" Dymphna said, with a hand on her hip. 

Earl entered the room behind the girls. He looked Dymphna up and
down and then announced, "Dinner shoon. Rou kidsh clean up." 

"Like, what did he say?" 

"Dinner will be ready soon," Thelma said. "We can clean up."
Thelma looked down at her raincoat. "I think that means he wants
us to stop making puddles in his kitchen, Dymphna." 

"Looks like the dog is taking care of that," Stanton said. 

Sloop had his head down, and was licking at the floor with his
carpet of a pink tongue. 

"I guess pepperoni makes a dog thirsty," Maytag said. 

"Durshty?" Earl mumbled. 

They all laughed. It just felt natural. 

* * * 

After dinner, Earl went back to the kitchen, refusing offers of
help from the gang. "Rour payink fur it," Earl chuckled, letting
them know clearly there would be no discount just for helping
with dishes. 

Instead, everyone went back to the parlor area. There, they
broke up into smaller groups. Maytag tried talking to Dymphna to
learn more about the kids' operation, but spent more time staring
at her legs and telling stories about being an FBI agent. Shagger
and Sloop dog had eaten too much and were asleep on the floor,
leaning against one another. Ted and Thelma, fascinated with real
crime solving, spoke to Agent Stanton. 

"So what's it like tracking down real criminals?" Ted asked. 

"Tracking down real criminals," Stanton repeated, looking around
the room at a napping teenager, his dog, and her partner laughing
with a redhead in a miniskirt. "It's a real challenge sometimes."
She turned a bit to face Ted, and flipped her hair. If she had to
be here while Maytag pursued a boyhood crush, then she could at
least pursue a boy. A Nordic hunk of a boy, at that. 

"When we started this," Ted the Nordic hunk said, "We were just
having a good time, you know? But we've really taken on a
detective's attitude since then, trying to look for real
mysteries." 

"So what do you make of the wigs downstairs?" Stanton asked him. 

"What wigs?" Thelma asked. 

Stanton forgot that the girls were outside when Sloopy had
stumbled in to the basement. She explained their discovery. 

"Why would Earl need a disguise?" Thelma asked. 

"Maybe he's a fugitive," Ted said. "I bet you'd like to get your
hands on Earl's fingerprints, Agent Stanton." 

I'd like to get my hands on something, Stanton thought. First
your buns, then later I can wring Maytag's neck for dragging me
here. "No access to a lab," Stanton said. "But that's the right
idea." 

"Maybe we can look for more clues!" Thelma said enthusiastically. 

"Good idea!" Ted said. "Let's split up! Thelma, you see what you
can find with Shagger and Sloopy in the basement. Dymphna and
Agent Maytag can contact the sheriff to see what he knows about
Earl. Agent Stanton and I can search the rest of the house." 

Stanton liked that idea just fine. 

* * * 

Thelma was growing frustrated with her search partners. "Shagger,
I really don't think you're going to find any more clues here in
the kitchen." 

"Yeah," Shagger giggled. "But we did find this tasty ice cream,
right, Sloop?" 

Sloopy looked up at Thelma and barked, white ice cream dripping
off his nose. 

"You guys are terrible!" 

"Like, we're just into the finer things in life!" 

"That's nice, Shagger, but I'm interested in getting to the
bottom of this mystery, whatever it takes." 

"So are we, Thelma. Like, old man Earl might have hidden his old
ID at the bottom of this tub of ice cream!" 

"Ok, Shagger," Thelma said as she adjusted her glasses. "You stay
here and search through every container in the kitchen. I'll find
try to find some of the others. They've got to be making better
progress than this." 

* * * 

Upstairs, Stanton and Ted stopped kissing for a second just to
come up for air. 

Stanton ran her hands over Ted's burly chest, then moved up to
untie the orange handkerchief around his neck. "I always knew
they split up on the show like that so that you could make out
with the pretty girl." 

"I do appreciate the finer things in life," Ted said. 

Stanton pushed her lips against Ted's and slipped her tongue
along his mouth. Ted responded to her kiss with enthusiasm, and
ran his hands up Stanton's sides to her soft breasts. Ted moved
his mouth down to Stanton's neck and nibbled on the delicate skin
near of her throat. 

"Making out is fun," Ted said. "And you're a very pretty girl." 

"You're a good looking guy," Stanton replied. "And you know what
I like about good looking guys?" 

"No," Ted said, pulling back to look at her bright blue eyes. 

"I like sucking their dicks." 

* * * 

Thelma didn't have a chance to look for anyone before Dymphna
found her. The redhead walked in to the kitchen and fell into a
fit of laughter when Sloop dog lifted his head from a bucket, and
chocolate ice cream dripped from his face. 

"I see you've lost the trail already," Dymphna said when the
giggles subsided. 

"And you've lost your partner," Thelma said. 

"No, Agent Maytag is outside calling the sheriff where Earl can't
hear him." 

"Like where is the old mumble mouth, anyway?" Shagger asked. 

"I don't know," Thelma said. "But I think we won't find out
anything until we get a closer look at Earl, starting under that
cap." 

"Good idea, Thelma," Dymphna said. "Shagger, you wait here.
Thelma and I have a mission." 

"A mission?" Thelma asked. 

"I have a couple ideas on how to get a look under Earl's
disguise." Dymphna winked and grinned. 

"I think you've been hanging out with Ted too long," Thelma
answered. 

* * * 

Ted ran his fingers through Stanton's long brunette hair, and
bucked his hips to slide his cock in and out of her mouth. She
encouraged him by slapping him on the ass or guiding his hips
with her hands. 

"Oh, yeah," Ted groaned. She let him pump his rod into her mouth
and onto the warm velvet of her tongue with no resistance, but
sucked back when he pulled out, stroking him off with the ring of
her lips. "You give such good head," he moaned, turning head into
a word of at least three syllables. 

Stanton accepted the compliment by humming on his cock. She
wasn't ready to let him come, though. One more moan from Ted
and she pulled her mouth away. 

"Let's get onto this bed," she said, "and find out what kind of
head you give." 

* * * 

Dymphna and Thelma headed up the stairs carefully, moving on
tiptoe so as not to make noise. Thelma led the way, with Dymphna
behind her. Unknown to the girls, a third figure ascended the
stairs behind them, dressed in coveralls and a green "John Deere"
hat. The man stayed two steps behind Dymphna, and his head stayed
level with her ass. At one point he might have been able to lift
her purple skirt with his nose. Judging from the way his
attention stayed fixed on her pert little ass, that might have
been his objective. 

At the top of the stairs, Thelma looked back at Dymphna and gave
her the "keep quiet" sign of an index finger resting vertically
against her lips. To make a joke, Dymphna did the same thing, and
almost saw her pursuer before he could duck to the side. 

The girls stepped up into the hallway, providing their pursuer an
opening. He stayed back as they moved in single file. Then he
reached up and threw a switch. Light flooded the hall. Dymphna
and Thelma spun around. 

"Earl!' they said. 

"Rye rus rookin fuhr rou," Earl mumbled. 

"Funny," Dymphna said. "We were looking for you, too." 

"Rye ave shummin fur rou." 

"You have something for us?" Thelma asked. 

Earl held up a length of nylon rope. 

"Earl," Dymphna teased him by looping a lock of hair in her
fingers. "Have you seen the previews for our stage show?" 

He nodded affirmatively. 

Thelma said, "You can get tickets for the play in Lawrence for
ten dollars." 

"Thelma, I think Earl wants a performance right here. Don't you,
Earl?" Dymphna asked, cocking her hip. 

"Resh uhdoo," Earl said. 

"I think that can be arranged," Thelma said, putting her hands
behind her back and throwing her shoulders back so that her
breasts showed prominently. 

"Row much?" Earl asked. 

"Private show, Earl," Dymphna said. "No charge." 

* * * 

Stanton writhed on the bed. Ted had stripped off her clothes and
covered her with kisses, and she did her best to repay the favor.
Broad shoulders and a solid chest made for a lot of territory to
cover, though. Stanton made due with feeling the rock hard
muscles of his upper back while the blond hunk moved to lick her
pussy. 

Ted went at his work with slow swipes of his tongue, the tip
pressed firmly against Stanton's lips. The sensation was more
like being fingered than licked. That was all right with Stanton:
she liked being fingered just fine. 

Ted slid down on the bed and positioned himself squarely between
her legs. With his tongue jutting out for an extended period, his
open mouth began to water. Stanton's pussy creamed. A slick
wetness formed between her legs. There was no doubt she was being
licked now. 

"Oh, yes, Ted," Stanton moaned. 

Ted hooked his beefy arms under Stanton's legs and cupped her
round ass in his large hands. Her legs draped over his broad
shoulders and over his solid back. She hooked her ankles
together, at once spreading her legs farther apart and pulling
the man tight to her crotch. 

For his part, Ted licked with abandon. His tongue circled her
lips, flickered at her pearl, and poked inside her slit. He
massaged her ass. Fingertips as big as thumbs pried open her
labia to let his tongue probe deeper. 

When Heather moaned he licked faster, and when she paused in her
moaning he did something different. It was around the time he
started sucking on her clit that Stanton felt the muscles of her
lower body tense up and the pleasure well up against them. The
muscles buckled and gave in, but Ted's mouth did not, and the
pleasure spilled over her in a strong climax. 

Without waiting for her orgasm to subside, Ted rocked to the side
and flipped himself onto his back with Stanton still wrapped
around his face. Strong arms gripped the breathless brunette
around the waist and moved her smooth ass down his firm chest,
all the way to his waiting, swollen cock. 

"Heather," Ted moaned. 

Seems she wasn't so disoriented that she couldn't grip his turgid
rod and guide it straight up into her wet hole. She sat back on
his rigid tool, and they both took a deep breath before the
fucking started in earnest. 

* * * 

Supine, with arms extended above her head and bound together to
the headboard with nylon rope, Dymphna squirmed back and forth on
the bed. Her breasts heaved against the knit purple dress, and
the hemline inched up on her thighs. Earl was busy holding a leg
down and tying it to a bedpost at the foot of the bed. Thelma
lent a hand. 

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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