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From: swagato86@yahoo.co.uk (Swagato)
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NNTP-Posting-Date: 6 Nov 2001 12:50:01 GMT
Subject: {ASSM} Ladies' Tailor: Part-5 <*>
Date: Tue,  6 Nov 2001 11:10:09 -0500
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Hello,

Sorry for being late. With festive season on in Kolkata , "Aziz
tailoring shop" is really very busy. Please visit my shop to believe
my words. I had promised to post the next parts of "Ladies' Tailor"
couple of months back, but I had too many orders to do.  And then I
had to study "Differential Calculus", which is so tough for a high
school dropout like me ! Today, I just managed to write the next part
and  I post it for your pleasure. Let me know if you liked it or not.
But before I begin the story, here are my  warnings. Follow these VERY
STRICTLY.


NOTE:-

1. THIS STORY IS EXCLUSIVELY WRITTEN FOR FUN AND ENJOYMENT ONLY. I
WISH TO PAY MY DUE RESPECTS TO EVERY COMMUNITY, SEX, RELIGION,
PROFESSION AND DO NOT WISH TO OFFEND ANYBODY.

2. THE WORK IS FULLY COPYRIGHTED BY THE AUTHOR. PLEASE DO NOT POST OR
PUBLISH IT ANYWHERE WITHOUT AUTHOR'S DUE PERMISSION. POSTING THIS IN
ANY PAY SITE IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED.

3. THE STORY MAY CONTAIN SEXUAL DESCRIPTIONS OF EXPLICIT NATURE. IF
YOU ARE BELOW THE AGE OF 18 OR FEEL OFFENDED BY WRITINGS OF THIS
NATURE PLEASE DO NOT PROCEEED ANY FURTHER.

Please continue to send your comments at 

swagato86@yahoo.co.uk


It's me, Aziz.




*******************************Ladies' tailor:
Part-5*********************

One of my readers was too curious to know  why am I a high school
dropout. I never told you the sad story about it. Hope you will
sympathise with me after listening to it. Keep a handkerchief ready,
since you may feel like weeping.

Let's be serious now.

Not once, but twice I was driven out of the school. I was in the
seventh standard, when it happened for the first time. I used to go to
a co-ed school. We had gents as well as lady teachers there. Our maths
teacher was a lady and she was our paper-setter for the annual exams.
While  writing my  exams, I thought that before solving the arithmetic
sums, I should rather attempt my most favourite part, that is
Geometry. If you have read my earlier parts carefully, you would soon
recollect my passions for Geometry.

After having a look at the questions, I found that I knew the
definitions by heart and decided to attempt those straightaway. The
first question was : "Define isosceles triangle."

And I wrote, "A triangle having two of its sides as equal is called
isosceles triangle."

I was perfectly right, isn't it ? I knew that every definition should
be illustrated with example. So, I neatly drew an isosceles triangle.
Normally people show the vertex on the top, but I just drew it upside
down, that is base on top and vertex below. It makes no difference,
because it was still a perfect isosceles triangle by definition and I
verified it with the ruler. To impress the examiner more, I thought I
should cite some practical example and so I wrote,

"For example, the pubic triangle of a woman is an isosceles triangle
with clit as the vertex. In this figure, let A be the clitoris and BC
be the line segment where the bushes begin. Then, triangle ABC is an
isosceles triangle  having AB=AC . To illustrate more lucidly, I drew
a bushy texture inside the triangle with my pencil.

I wasn't wrong. Was I ? Didn't I deserve full marks in that ?

But, I wasn't rewarded for what I wrote. Instead, the lady teacher
refused to examine my answerscript and sent it straightaway to the
headmaster with a note of complaint. I went to the school to collect
my annual exam reports and  I was summoned to the headmaster's room.
When I went in, I found our lady maths teacher there and both were
furious with me.

"Aziz ! How dare you write such nonsense in your annual exams
answerscript ?" the headmaster shouted at me at the top of his voice.
His face turned red in anger.

"Bb...but Sir, was I wrong ? Isn't it an isosceles triangle ? Ask
madam !"

"I am not saying you haven't drawn isosceles triangle, but who asked
you to write  these ?" The headmaster showed me the answerscript,
where the words "pubic triangle" and "clitoris" were circled by the
examiner in red.

"But Sir, isn't that an isosceles triangle ? If madam proves to me
that she doesn't have isosceles triangle there, then you punish me" I
said in my defence.

"WHAT !!!! How dare you say that ? You are being expelled from this
school. Just get out !" The headmaster almost exploded in anger.

Tears were rolling down my eyes. Even now it's rolling down, as I
narrate this sad story. Excuse me, if this tragic story made you weep,
please use your handky.

As I was walking out of headmaster's room with tears in my eyes, I met
our class teacher. He was a nice man and quite affectionate to me.
When he heard about the incident, he said, "Aziz ! You could cite a
man's pubic area as example. That wouldn't have offended the lady
teacher. Perhaps, for all you know, she would have liked it."

"But sir,..." I paused as I was unable to control my emotions and then
I continued, "In that case, how would I specify the vertex ?" My class
teacher couldn't disagree that my example was the most correct one. If
our maths teacher wasn't comfortable with her clitoris, she could take
any other suitable point, say her pee hole as the vertex. Isn't it ?

Anyway, headmaster's decision on expulsion was final and I had to
leave the co-ed school.

Then, I got admitted to a Boys' school. Only boys were my classmates,
only gents teachers were there. So, there were no risks, no
complications. I was quite happy there and comfortable with all the
subjects - Geometry, Chemistry, Physics etc. I happily continued there
till Class IX.

One day, there was a notice that the Inspector of Schools would make a
visit. So, all of us were asked to come to the school in neat and
clean dresses, keep our classroom clean etc. When Inspector's car
arrived, we realized that there was no inspector and she was an
inspectress. Quite a good looking and glamorous lady she was.

When she came to our class room accompanied by our headmaster, Physics
class was going on. Our Science teacher was teaching the chapter on
"Expansion of solids". All the forty students of our section were
present on that day and all (even me !!!) were listening to the
teacher very attaintively, or at least pretended that way.

The  lady inspector wanted to ask some questions to the students to
make sure that the teaching standard of the school was upto the mark.

"Can anybody give examples on solids that expand on heating ?" she
asked.
Several hands were raised, including mine. It so happened that the
lady inspector thought that I would be the most intelligent one. "Yes,
you there in the last bench....tell me" She was inviting my prompt
answer.

Believe me. My answer was too prompt. I quickly said, "Cock". 

"How funny !" she giggled. "I have never seen a cock expanding....."

What a poor unfortunate lady she is ! I felt so sorry for her. 

Our science teacher whispered into her ears, "Madam, he is talking
about 'nunu'", explaining the term in Bengali.

Only then I realized that before our Science teacher had explained,
the lady didn't understand the vulgar meaning of cock . She thought I
was referring to male domestic fowl and found my answer rather funny.

Within seconds, the inspectress' face turned red in rage. She was
boiling with anger, as she shouted, "Headmaster, why don't you
immediately expell this boy from the school ? Otherwise, I am going to
 cancel affiliation of your school" and walked out of the classroom in
a haste.

I was called inside the headmaster's chamber shortly. The lady
inspector had left the school by then.

"You, you have let me down. You have let the school down. How am I
going to face the inspector ?" The headmaster was looking sad and
dejected.

"But Sir, tell me, am I wrong ? She had never seen any cock expanding,
but we could show her 42 cocks expanding if I had taken out this
magazine and showed the pictures to the entire class. She could have 
verified that all 42 were solids and hot. Cocks always tell the truth.
42 cocks can not tell a lie." I displayed out a porno magazine, which
I had secretly purchased from the street corner just a few days back
and kept it hidden inside my school bag. That only complicated the
matter.

In the end, the headmaster decided to expell me from the school, as he
was under pressure from the inspector. Since then, I am a high school
dropout.

Forget about my ill fate. Since you asked me, I narrated this  sad
story. Use your handkerchief, if you have tears rolling down. Don't
weep for me. Calm down please. Wipe your tears off.

Let me come back to business. As I always say, I mean business.

As I told you last time, I need to stitch panties for madam. It should
be just tight enough to keep her buttock in prominence and loose
enough for a rhythmic swing as she walks. Pair of buttocks is a curved
3-D object and  I have to work out its derivatives to successfully
tailor a panty for her. That's why I took so much of time to study
Differential Calculus. In the end, I gave up. I found out that
derivatives can be calculated only for continuous curves and surfaces.
So ass cheeks are okay, but continuity fails at the ass crack. There,
we have to determine the limits. Limit exists, that I know, but where
? Finally, I concluded that I must visit madam's house once and
properly measure her buttocks.  I thought I should ask for an
appointment since madam is a busy person. I dialled her telephone
number from a public booth.

"Hello", I heard a female voice. The line quality was poor, nothing
unusual about Kolkata telephones.  Line disturbances were interfering,
but  I had to bear with it.

"Madam, it's me, Aziz." I said.

"Oh, that's nice of you. How do you do ?" Her voice appeared different
from her usual one. But, that's because of poor line quality I
guessed.

"Madam, I want to come to your place soon, maybe tomorrow evening if
you are free for sometime."

"That's fine, you are welcome tomorrow at six in the evening. Would
you like to know anything specific ?" she asked.

"Oh yes, ma'am. Differential Calculus. I want to measure your
buttock's curvature." I explained her clearly.

"Differential Calculus ? That's okay, but I couldn't follow what you
said afterwards. Would you just repeat ? I can't hear you clearly."

"Yeah, I want to measure your buttock's curvature, determine it's
centre of curvature etc." I re-explained. What else to do when the
line quality is so bad ?

"Curvature ? Yes, I understand. But .............. butter ?" she
asked. The line quality was so annoying ! I  couldn't follow what she
said before "butter." I only tried to guess what it would be.

" Butter ? Okay ma'am, keep  a 500 grams pack ready. You will at least
need that much, since your surface area  is quite large. Then the
discontinuity, the limit..." It wasn't a tailor's job I know, but
okay, just to keep my customer happy, I don't mind.

"Oh you want to know about limits and continuity too ? Then  I need to
spend at least two hours with you. It's okay with me, but I still
don't understand why you are talking about butter ?"

"It wasn't me, ma'am. You only suggested." I clarified.

"Then ! What were you talking about ? I couldn't follow you clearly."

"I said I'll come to see your buttocks tomorrow."

"See what ? Hello,.....hello,......oh no, the line quality is so bad !
Hello...hello..."

"Buttocks......ma'am can you hear me please,.....PAACHHAA ! PAACHHAA
!! I'll butter you there with a 'Manly Massage', if that is your wish.
But remember to keep that- I mean the 'butter'   out of the
refrigerator at least two hours before. " I was shouting at the top of
my voice to keep myself audible at the other end. All the passers-by,
ladies gents- everybody, were looking at me with surprise and
curiosity.

 The Bengali translation of buttocks definitely helped her to
understand.

"Ashish, how dare you say all these ! You come to the class tomorrow,
I'll take you to the Principal." This time, the voice was  clear.

Then only I realized that I was talking to some lady maths teacher and
Ashish was her student. I remembered my sad past and I didn't want to
be responsible for yet another drop-out.

"Ma'am don't punish Ashish. He is innocent. I'm not Ashish. I am Aziz,
the tailor. Sorry for the wrong number. Please don't mind.", I said,
before going off-hook.

After this confusion, I decided that from now onwards, I am always
going to say,

"It's me, your tailor, Aziz."

Katie, if you are reading this story, don't mind. Since you are my
pal, would you mind if I be your tailor ? As long it is a doctor or a
tailor, there is no reason why you should mind.

I dialled  correctly next time and spoke to my madam. She told me,
"Aziz, I just can't wait. My husband is out of town now. You can come
early in the morning if possible. Have breakfast in my place."

"So nice of you, ma'am. Don't make any elaborate arangement for us.
Just bread, butter and banana will suffice."

"Okay, surely I'll keep those ready."she said.

I didn't specifically mention about juice. I thought madam would keep
it ready for us anyway.

I made all my plannings for panty measurements. Before leaving for
Madam's house I checked that everything was there inside my kit - the
order book, a piece of thread and a ruler. The blouses which I
stitched for madam were also ready and I packed those. Then I told
Pintu to get ready, "Aabe Pintu, jaldi taiaar ho jaa...."

"Boss, let me pee at least......", he answered from the bathroom.

*************************End of Part-5. To be
continued**************************************

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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