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Message-ID: <33073asstr$1003968602@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: sandia@texas.net
Subject: {ASSM} "Radio Star"        [F/F, M+/F, voyuer, sex dares]  Reformatted
Date: Wed, 24 Oct 2001 20:10:02 -0400
Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail
Approved: <assm@asstr-mirror.org>
Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d

"Radio Star"
by Sandia.

Copyright 2001.
Do not post to pay sites.

Storycodes:  F/F, M+/F, voyeur, sex dares.

As ever, comments appreciated at sandia@texas.net.


If you've done something you're ashamed of, (or even if you just want to), and 
you'd like to see it posted as a story, write me at sandia@texas.net.  
Anonymity assured.


"Radio Star"

In St. Paul, where I used to live, there's a DJ who wanted to be the next 
Howard Stern.  He used to call women and ask them to talk dirty, or try to get 
them to come into his studio and strip for him, that kind of thing.  I had a 
boyfriend who used to like him, and he'd tell me about his stunts.  He called 
himself Johnny Firm.  (The DJ, not the boyfriend.  The boyfriend's name is 
Sidney.)  

A couple of months before I left St. Paul, he began promoting what he called 
his "Ultimate Sex Dare Contest."  The prize, he said, was fifty thousand 
dollars.  He told his listeners to persuade their wives and girlfriends to call 
in, and my boyfriend began pressuring me to do it.  

Sidney knew I needed the money.  I owed him fifteen hundred dollars.  I'd also 
borrowed from my parents and my friends.  After I'd dropped out of college, I 
couldn't find a job, and I'd maxed out all my credit cards.  I'd finally 
settled for a job as a receptionist, but the pay was lousy.  I couldn't support 
myself and I was getting further and further behind.  When they started calling 
about the student loans I started to get desperate.  

So that's how I found myself trudging through downtown Minneapolis to get to 
the studio.  I was pretty miserable.  Sidney had promised to drive me, but 
something had come up.  It was bitterly cold, as it almost always is there, and 
I was dressed indecently under the warmest coat I had, which wasn't warm 
enough.  By the time I got to the building I was shivering uncontrollably.  I 
wasn't looking forward to the "audition," but I really needed the money.  At 
least that's what I told myself.  I wasn't what you'd call "experienced," but I 
figured I could do what the other girls could do.  It wasn't like my parents 
listened to the show.  

Firm's producer was surprisingly nice to me, when I met her.  She was a 
friendly older woman in a business suit, and carried a folder full of papers 
and legal forms.  She sat me down in a little crowded room and fed me donuts 
and hot chocolate.  She seemed so "normal" I was a little embarrassed when I 
took off my coat and she saw what I was wearing.  Sidney had helped me put 
together an outfit to make me "competitive."  I was wearing a Hooter's style 
tee shirt, which was much too small and tight for me.  The skirt he had me wear 
was barely a skirt at all, it was so short and revealing.  I'd completed the 
outfit with some thigh-high stockings and a pair of fuck-me pumps.  She seemed 
unfazed, however, and smiled reassuringly.  

She explained the screeners would put the harder dares on hold, to make sure we 
started small.  "We don't want to lose you all on the first caller," she 
smiled.  She showed me a list of dares they'd prepared.  They were things 
like, "Do you swallow," and "How big was the biggest guy you've had."  She 
warned me, though, that Johnny was hoping to get to real callers quickly, and 
that he was counting on the show to really boost his ratings.  "He's hoping the 
show will stir some controversy," she told me.  She assured me they'd only use 
our first names on the air.  

Soon another girl arrived, much prettier than me, I thought, with sleek black 
hair and a kind of "Elvira" thing going.  She was dressed sexy too, though not 
quite as slutty as me.  She was wearing thigh-high black leather boots but her 
skirt was longer, and she'd covered up her top.  I complimented her, and she 
admired me in turn.  "I wish I had boobs like yours," she smiled.  Three more 
women showed up while we chatted.  There was a blonde woman with obviously fake 
tits, a petite, gorgeous Asian, and a disheveled looking child who looked badly 
in need of a fix.

We waited a little longer, but finally the producer handed out the legal forms 
and questionnaires.  She explained the rules of the game again, and explained 
the show would retain the rights to everything we did while we were on the air, 
including the right to rebroadcast, or sell the show to other media.  We 
promised to hold the show harmless, and said we were acting voluntarily, and 
that we were all of age.  She told us they didn't want any professionals, and 
we had to sign something saying we weren't strippers or hookers or porn stars.  
She said they'd "discreetly" call our jobs to confirm we worked where we said 
we did.  (The heroin addict lost interest at that point.)  When that was over, 
we went to another room, where we met with Johnny and his production team.

I got the impression they were disappointed there were only four of us.  Johnny 
was a surprisingly ordinary looking guy, though he did make a point of 
undressing me with his eyes.  (Not that that would take long!)  They had us 
stand up and turn around for them, and asked us if we'd be willing to take off 
our clothes.  They complimented me on my outfit, and asked me to wear it to the 
contest.  They asked us a few awkward questions, like whether any of us had 
ever been with a woman, and whether we had ever wanted to.  I told them "no" to 
the first question, but admitted I had thought about it.  They reviewed the 
sexual history forms we'd submitted.  When it was over, they told us to tell 
our friends to call, and that they'd let us know in a couple of weeks.  It was 
easy.  

Sydney was excited for me when I told him.  I met him at an old warehouse, 
where his band went to practice.  He made me describe the other girls, and the 
clothes they were wearing, and asked me what Johnny was like.  He told me I was 
sure to make the cut, and complimented me on the outfit he'd picked out.  When 
I told him about "Elvira" he said she was right about my boobs, and started 
trying to fondle them right there in the warehouse.  I practically had to fight 
him to get him off of me.  

He made love to me enthusiastically that night.  He even gave me oral sex, 
something he almost never did. 

I remember thinking afterwards how proud I was of myself for having gone 
through with the audition.  I'd finally solve my money problems!  I'd finally 
be out of debt!  I fell asleep imagining all that money, and how nice it'd be 
to be able to get on with my life again.  

They called me two weeks later, and told me I'd been selected.  

So that's how I came to be in the studio, in November, wearing the same slutty 
outfit I'd worn before.  Sidney was able to drive me this time, but they 
wouldn't let him stay.  I was just as glad.  I wasn't sure I wanted him to see 
it anyway.  He kissed me and said he'd hook up with his friends, and they'd 
listen to the show.  

They set up an elaborate buffet for us, and we ate shellfish and fruit 
cocktail.  I was impressed with the service, and felt better about being 
there.  They'd fashioned something called they called "Kiwi Passion," which 
seemed very strong but went down easy.  I was thankful for the liquor.  I 
figured I could use all the "liquid courage" I could get.  The other girls 
seemed to feel the same.  There were six of us.  

I was happy to see "Elvira" had made the cut.  The Asian woman was there too.  
Her name was Misha.  Tiffany was a cute redhead, with green eyes and a flawless 
complexion.  She wore a green, velvety, strapless cocktail-style dress.  It 
came down to about mid-thigh, and really hugged her figure.  I couldn't help 
but admire her.  There was a tall, elegant black woman, who didn't smile much 
and didn't drink.  She was sexy, in an aristocratic way, but I couldn't imagine 
what she was doing there.  There was a very young looking girl with straight 
blonde hair and a perfect cheerleader body.  She was even wearing a skirt and a 
sweater like a cheerleader might wear.  Her name was Tonya.  She looked sixteen 
to me, though she must have been at least eighteen to have made the cut.  I 
felt a little better after seeing my competition.  They didn't look like porn 
stars or hookers to me.  I felt like I could beat them.    

They led us to the studio, where they'd set up six stools with microphones in 
front of each.  They gave us each a glass of water and a taller glass of Kiwi 
Passion.  We sat in front of Johnny, who had a big desk, a swivel chair and a 
bank of studio equipment around him.  I saw a man with a camera in the studio, 
and I asked the assistant about it.  "Yeah," she said, "they're going to make a 
tape of the show."  She shrugged and continued what she was doing.  I looked 
around at the other girls, but they didn't seem to mind.  I realized now what 
they'd meant by "other media."  I shrugged myself.  It wasn't like what I was 
about to do was private.  What difference would it make if a few more men would 
see it?

Besides, I thought, it was too late to back out.

Then I wondered if Sidney would buy the tape.

The show started soon after that, so I didn't have much time to worry.  Johnny 
introduced the show, and explained the rules of the game.  He introduced us and 
described us each in turn, reading parts of our biographies.  He described me 
as a "well-formed" strawberry-blonde, and made a guess at my bra size.  "It 
says here" he said, "you like to fantasize about women."  I laughed nervously, 
but admitted it was true.  He asked me about my bra size and I told him I was a 
little bigger than he'd said.  He asked the others similar questions.  When 
Tiffany said she was married, he asked if she ever "took it up the ass."  She 
seemed embarrassed, and said she didn't do that.  To my surprise, the Asian 
girl would later volunteer she was an "ass fanatic."  

He introduced the "judges," and said they'd help him with the dares, and 
resolve any conflicts.  The place had gotten pretty crowded.  Aside from the 
judges and camera men there were a couple of technicians, a sound guy, and the 
assistant--a girl who filled our glasses or did whatever needed doing.  There 
was also a group of men watching us through a plate glass window.  

He said we were all anxious to be there, and made a joke about our promising 
not to sue.  He told his audience we were all "real women," and none of us were 
strippers or whores.  Then he went into a pitch about the video, and gave out a 
number to call to order it.    

He asked if we were ready for our first dare, and we nodded yes.  

The first few dares were pretty easy.  They had us tell our favorite sex 
positions, and describe our favorite cocks.  I said missionary, though that 
wasn't strictly true, and described Sidney, to the best of my ability.  

I found out some things about the other girls.  Like Tiffany, Elvira was also 
married.  She said her husband was a biker, and claimed he'd be the first to 
buy the tape.  Tonya said she was 19, and needed the money for school.  Tiffany 
said her husband was an electrician, and had been injured on the job.  She said 
they'd hoped to start a family.

I wasn't surprised when the black lady was the first to go.  She left on an 
easy dare--we had to choose a girl and "passionately" kiss her.  The judges were 
to determine whether the kiss was passionate.  She gave up after her second 
try, leaving to a chorus of boos.  

I was relieved to see her go.  The sooner the other girls dropped out, I 
thought, the sooner I'd win the money.  

Misha chose me to kiss.  I stood up as she approached me.  She leaned into me, 
folding her hands behind my neck and pulling my face down to meet her.   In a 
moment I felt her tongue probing against my lips.  I did open my mouth for 
her.  It was strange having a woman's tongue in my mouth, but not unpleasant.  
I wanted to go along.  I could feel her body pressing up against me.  Her hands 
slipped down my back, and then over the curve of my ass.  She cupped my cheeks 
in her hands and squeezed.  I began to feel uncomfortable.  Then I felt one 
hand slip below the hem of my skirt.  She touched my naked thigh and rubbed her 
hand against me there, pulling my skirt up behind me.  The judges cheered for 
us.  I was embarrassed, of course, but pleased to have performed so well.  

As I watched the other girls kiss, I was surprised at how turned on it made 
me.  The girls all put on quite a show.  Even Tiffany, who seemed the most 
reluctant, squeezed her partner's breast.  They all rubbed up against each 
other and kissed with open mouths.  I could see the men around us were getting 
off on it too.  Even the assistant, who was mainly filling our drinks for us, 
stopped to watch the show.

When it was my turn, I kissed Tiffany.  Her lips felt soft and full, and I 
could feel her breasts pressing against me.  I touched her there on impulse, 
feeling the softness of her tits.  I opened my mouth, and sucked her lower lip, 
caressing it with my tongue.  I slipped my hands around her back and caressed 
her, as Misha had done to me.  She pressed herself against me and rubbed 
herself against my thigh.  When I sat down I swallowed, breathing deeply.  I 
took another drink.

Soon they had us take our blouses off.  I'd expected this, of course, and had 
chosen my prettiest bra.  I wasn't surprised to see the other girls wearing 
sexy bras as well.  This wasn't so bad, except for Johnny's commentary.  

Tiffany had to go first.  She is very well endowed, and was practically 
bursting out of the skimpy bra she was wearing.  Her fair skin looked lovely 
against the lacy powder blue fabric.  She began to flush as Johnny described 
her tits on the radio.  He and the judges decided they were real, and said she 
looked better than most porn stars.  They began to talk about how good it'd 
feel to titty-fuck her, and asked her how often she got her titties fucked.  
She was blushing furiously, but hesitantly did admit how much her husband liked 
to rub himself against and between her breasts.  Johnny told his listeners how 
cute she looked, "blushing like a schoolgirl." 

When it was my turn, I was determined not to be embarrassed, but my breasts 
popped out of my too-tight tee shirt as I struggled to get if off, and bounced 
around obscenely.  The camera guy was kneeling down in front of me, and grinned 
as I struggled to sit still.  Fortunately, Johnny didn't grill me like he'd 
done Tiffany, though he did compliment me on my boobs.  I didn't worry too 
much, especially after what Tiffany had gone through.  I knew they'd likely 
soon have my bra off me too.

I did blush later, though, when Tiffany caught me staring at her boobs.  I 
couldn't help myself.  Her tits really were attractive.  

They asked a few more questions, then Johnny said the next dare was to take a 
public spanking.  Looking back, perhaps this was a turning point for me.  If 
I'd seen it done to another girl first, perhaps I would have backed out.  As it 
was, once I'd gone through that, I found myself more determined than ever.  

I was the first to get my spanking on the show.  They made me bend over 
Johnny's desk.  I was facing him.  I remember thinking what a show I was making 
of my tits for him.  Perhaps it was the alcohol, but I didn't even think of 
what my other half would look like.  They made me bend down until my nipples 
touched the wood.  I had to spread my legs until my hips were even with the 
desktop.  I gripped the edge of the table as I prepared myself.  I'd expected 
an open-handed slap.

I yelped when I felt the stinging pain on my backside.  I hadn't expected it 
would hurt.  I craned my neck and saw the man had a ruler.  Johnny grinned.  He 
got up and walked behind me.  I heard someone laugh.  I thought of backing out, 
but it seemed silly, having already gone this far.  I clenched my teeth.  I 
laid my cheek on the desktop and closed my eyes.  I had two more to go.  I 
strengthened my grip on the table.  I got through the next two without 
squealing again.  I found the anticipation was the worst.   

I'm sure the spanking sounds played well on the radio.  Afterwards I touched 
myself where he'd hurt me.  Johnny laughed.  "She looks like a naughty little 
girl," he told his listeners.  I was determined not to cry.  I adjusted myself 
to my seat.  My butt was still stinging from the slapping.  The other girls 
didn't look at me.  

Elvira was supposed to have gone next.  She looked very unsure of herself as 
she approached the desk.  She glanced at the man with the ruler.  I saw her 
glance at me.  I'm not sure if it was the embarrassment of getting spanked like 
that or the evil look of the man with the ruler, but she quit the game.  I was 
glad to see her go.  I didn't really want to see her go through what I'd been 
through, and besides, there were only four of us now.

Tonya went next.  She looked much more determined as she bent over and spread 
her legs.  There was some discussion among the judges before the spanker 
flipped her skirt up.  That's when I realized what I'd looked like from 
behind.  My own skirt would have been far too short to have covered anything.  
Now she was clearly visible through her panties.  They barely covered her butt, 
and were stretched tight against her vulva.  Her blonde hair curled out from 
around the material.  She made a move to cover herself, but they warned her not 
to.  They waited while the cameraman knelt to get a better shot.  I was 
embarrassed all over again when I realized this was how I'd looked.

She was tougher than she looked.  She didn't make a sound.  I admit I was 
disappointed.  I'd wanted her to quit.  

Tiffany was a different story.  She bravely spread her legs like I had done, 
and touched her nipples to the wood.  She lay there calmly while she was 
uncovered.  But you could see her trembling, once they raised the skirt.  

Her cheeks began to turn red even before they spanked her.  When he finally 
brought it down it made it made the loudest noise so far.  She jumped and 
squealed.  She started to stand up.

 "Quit...  quit..." I remember thinking.  But she forced herself back down and let 
him flip her skirt up.  There was a clear red mark across her butt where he had 
slapped her.    

Johnny walked around behind her and blocked my view.  I stood up so I could see 
around him.    

"That red really matches her hair," he said.  "Will they be able to see that on 
the video?"  The cameraman nodded yes.  "I think she's almost done quivering," 
he said, "She's ready for another."  They made her ask please to be hit again.  
She did it, sobbing between her words.  I began to wonder if her situation was 
as bad as mine.  She seemed desperate.  I felt a little sorry for her.  I still 
wanted her to quit.  I promised myself I wouldn't quit no matter what.

She was a mess when they were done with her, her mascara running down her 
cheeks.  

When we were off the air, the assistant asked if she was sure she wanted to 
continue.  She nodded yes.  The assistant cleaned the makeup off her face.  
None of the guys were any nicer to us when we were off the air than they were 
when we were on.    

Misha was the last to go.  I was deeply disturbed by her show.  She was wearing 
a black g-string underneath her dress.  She looked back and smiled at the man 
with the ruler.  "Mmmm," she said, after the man had hit her.  She rubbed her 
thighs together.  She didn't even act like it hurt.

Even Johnny could only stare.  Afterwards, he said she took it like a "perfect 
little slut," and described her as a "winner."  She practically strutted back 
to us.    

I didn't let it faze me.    

The next dare was to put on a sex show.  We each had to pretend to be a man, 
and simulate sex act with one of the other women.  We were to be judged on 
how "realistic" we made the sex act seem.  Johnny said if the "woman" failed to 
go along, she would be out of the show.  "This is your chance to eliminate the 
competition," he grinned at us.  

Misha picked me again.  I began to wonder if she was out to get me.  

"She has to do whatever I say?" she asked, and Johnny nodded and grinned at 
her.  

"Make her your bitch," he said.  

"I want her up on your desk again."

I wondered if she was going to try to spank me. 

Nervously I approached the desk.  As I leaned over I wondered if my ass cheeks 
had red marks on them like the ones they'd given Tiffany.  Johnny stared at my 
tits as I bent over in front of him.  He licked his lips lasciviously.  "I'll 
bet there isn't a guy out there who wouldn't trade his wife to be where I am 
right now," he said.  

I heard Misha's heels clicking on the floor behind me.  She put her hand on my 
back and pushed me down onto the desk.  "I want her to spread her legs some 
more," she said.

She pushed my butt down until my clit was pushed up against the edge of the 
desktop.  In this position I was totally exposed and open.  I could feel my 
panties stretching and pulling across my butt.  

"That's good," Misha murmured.  

"Spanking is not a sex act!" I said.  Johnny and the judges laughed at me.

I stayed like that for that for a while.  I wondered what she was doing, but I 
kept my chin on the desk, staring at Johnny's tie.  

Then I felt Misha's hand on my butt.  She began to caress me there, along the 
edge of my panties.  She was squeezed and massaged my butt cheeks, letting her 
fingers slip between them.  I gasped a small protest.  She giggled and squeezed 
harder.  

"I can't wait to fuck this ass," she announced, in a mock man's voice.  She 
laughed again.  She slipped her hands along my panties, fingering my clit and 
pussy.

Despite the humiliation, her caresses began to excite me.  I could feel my 
nipples hardening against the wood.

 "Get ready for me, BITCH," I heard her say.  Her hands left my ass and grabbed 
me by my hips.  She began to thrust her pelvis against my ass and pussy, like 
she was fucking me.  My feelings of pleasure evaporated.  She was really 
banging herself against me, forcing me painfully against the edge of the 
table.  I managed to lean back a little, to get myself off the edge.  "Oh, you 
like that bitch?" she asked.  "You like my cock in your pussy?"  I gritted my 
teeth.  I really hated her.  

She slipped a hand between us, underneath my panties.  I felt her fingertips 
touch my pussy lips.  

With my hips away from the table's edge, and her fingertips on my pussy, I 
found it hard to deny the pleasure.  She would rub herself against me, and 
stroke me with her fingers.  The friction of her pelvis and the touch of her 
fingers was starting to make me wet.  Each thrust would push her middle finger 
deeper inside me.  She continued talking dirty, talking me what a juicy cunt I 
was and how good her cock felt inside me.  I hated myself for it, but the 
feelings she was giving me still felt good.  She told me she was going to come 
inside me.  At this point I closed my eyes.  She grunted and jammed her middle 
finger while she pretended to come inside.  After, she wiped her middle finger 
on my panties.  She slapped me and told me what a good fuck I'd been.  There 
was silence when I got up and took my place.

"Wow," Johnny breathed.  "Guys, you'll just have to buy the video to see that 
one."  I wondered how much of what she'd said to me had played out on the 
radio.  I took another drink.

I thought about picking Misha, but chose Tiffany instead.  

I had her get on her knees in front of me.  I looked down at her tits, and felt 
a little quiver between my legs.  She looked up at me.  I could see fear in her 
face.  

I made her pretend to blow me.  I put my pussy only inches from her face.  I 
made her open her mouth as I talked down to her.  I told her my big fat cock 
was gonna feel great sliding around in her mouth, that I was going to come in 
there and make her swallow.  I told her I was sliding my sticky cock across her 
face.  She blanched and I took her face in my hands and began to pretend I was 
really fucking her face.  She didn't try to get away.  I was rubbing my pussy 
against her face and really getting off on it.  I told myself I was trying to 
make her quit, but I also enjoyed the feeling of her lips and nose rubbing me 
through my panties.  

When it was over, she wiped her face with her hand.  She was kneeling on the 
floor.  I realized I'd soaked right through my panties, leaving my cunt juices 
on her lips and face.  

"At least I didn't stick my finger up your pussy and slap your just-spanked 
ass," I thought as I turned to take my chair.  I finished off another Kiwi 
Passion.  

I watched Tonya give up, and then there were three.  

We took a series of stripping dares.  First we stripped off our bras, then we 
took our skirts and panties off.  Once I was naked, I could see the slickness 
between my thighs.  They had us dance for them.  Misha openly stroked herself, 
and when it was my turn I dipped my fingers in my pussy.  They came out wet and 
slippery.  

Tiffany squeezed her breasts for them, but had trouble keeping her balance.  I 
wondered if I'd looked as drunk as her.  I looked around at the girl to bring 
me another drink.   

My memory after that becomes increasingly spotty.  The assistant did bring me 
another drink, and I drank it all without stopping.  I remember I felt like 
looking down on myself, like I wasn't really me.  I can only blame the Passion 
for the things that happened next.  

I watched Tiffany get her pussy fucked.  

They spread her out in front of us.  Her pussy was gaping open.  One of the 
judges, a tall thin black man, positioned his cock against her opening.  She 
was sobbing quietly.  I remember watching in fascination as his long dick 
disappearing into her pussy.  She became still soon after she felt him enter 
her.  

Once his dick had disappeared inside her pussy, he stroked her thighs and ass 
with his hands.  He told her she had the best feeling cunt he'd had in a long, 
long time.  He pulled himself out of her just as slowly as he'd stuck it in, 
and I could see her juices shining on his cock.  The cameraman focused in on 
them.  Then he began pushing himself back into her.  Gradually he increased his 
speed and tempo, until he was really fucking her.  Tiffany responded.  You 
could see her beginning to enjoy it.  You could hear her grunting and sighing 
quietly.  When he came inside her, I thought she might have been coming too.  
But afterwards she broke down sobbing, crying about her husband.  The assistant 
eventually had to lead her away.  I don't remember seeing her again.

I knew I was going next.

The next thing I remember I was already on the table, waiting for my turn to 
get fucked.  I remember thinking, "This isn't really me," as I felt his 
cockhead touch my opening.  It must have been a big fat cock, because it hurt a 
little going in.  I don't know who's it was, but I do remember the moment of 
clarity, as I felt him going in.  It faded as he started fucking me for real.  
I remember thinking, "It's between me and Misha now," when he started to come 
inside me.  

They had us eat each other's cunts.  Misha's was slimy and gross.  I didn't 
care, though.  I ran my tongue all over her, swallowing the sticky disgusting 
mess that wound up coating my tongue.  I'm sure she was freshly fucked.  

I imagine I was just as disgusting when she did me.  I really enjoyed her 
tongue inside me, though.  We were supposed to try to make each other come.  

At some point the show degenerated into a regular gang-bang.  They took the 
stools away, and I lied down on the floor for them.  I fucked myself with 
bottles and other things they handed me.  I let them come on my tits and face, 
on my pussy.  I licked their cocks and balls for them.  Then I was back on the 
desk.  I don't remember how long I was there, but I remember getting fucked 
like that for what seemed a long time.  They also fucked me up my ass.  I think 
I squealed when I felt it there, but I was past resisting.  I don't remember 
any pain.  I may have even enjoyed it.  I still had the come in my ass the next 
day.  

At some point Misha was gone, though I don't remember her leaving.  When every 
man in the room had had me, and maybe every man on the floor, they declared me 
the winner.  They said there'd be a check in the mail.  They put me in a cab 
and sent me home.  

The next morning was the worst.  I was stuck to my bed sheets.  One of my eyes 
was stuck shut.  My hair was a tangled mess, with gobs of dried come.  My 
breasts, my stomach, my pussy were all covered in dried and congealed spunk.  
There was a pool of leaked out come between my legs.  My bed, my blankets, my 
clothes were ruined.  

I took a scalding shower.  I douched, I scrubbed, I took an enema.  I tried to 
remember what I'd done, and then I stopped trying.  I threw my clothes and 
sheets and blankets away.  I sat on the couch and cried.  I called my boyfriend 
and left a message.  He never called me back.  

It wasn't long before I left Minneapolis.  Everyone at my job knew about what 
I'd done.  Once I ran out of sick leave I quit.  I couldn't bear to see them 
again.  I spent a lot of time in my apartment.  The newspapers used my name in 
their stories.  The FCC investigated.  Radio stations stopped carrying Johnny's 
show.  

My check didn't come.

I live in Memphis now.  My lawyer says he's still negotiating.  Their last 
offer was $5000 cash and a percentage of the tape sales.  He says they have no 
income, and may be out of business soon.  He's advising me to take it.  

The weather is much warmer here.  I've learned you can walk away from debt, but 
it's much harder to forget the things you've done.  Even the things you can't 
remember.

I still communicate with my lawyer.

There is one bright spot, he says.  "At least your tape is selling well."

-- 
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reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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