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From: "R Jacobin" <jacobin2k@hotmail.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} Had to Be (mf inc rom, repost)
Date: Thu, 15 Mar 2001 14:10:03 -0500
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Had To Be
Jacobin
jacobin2k@hotmail.com


Standard disclaimers regarding sexually explicit material apply. The good 
reader is reminded in particular that works of fiction often neglect 
real-world risks and consequences which should be taken into consideration 
in any re-creation or work-inspired acts.

This was originally posted 6/2000. This 3/2001 re-posting corrects some 
minor typos and random like errors that I was really sorry about and that 
made it through the first set of buxfixes (but then, this was the first 
story I ever posted, so cut me some slack). As this was my first work of 
this kind, feedback is appreciated at jacobin2k@hotmail.com

This work is copyright (c) by the author. You may download and keep copies 
for your personal use as long as the author's byline, disclaimer, e-mail 
address, and these three paragraphs remain on the copies. Posting to 
newsgroups or on websites is permitted as long as no money is charged for 
access and as long as the author's byline, disclaimer, e-mail address, and 
these three paragraphs remain on the story.  Please respect my work as much 
as I've tried to respect the reader.

--

"You've grown so much, Jack," my aunt said to me, smiling. She was sitting 
with my uncle across from me and my parents, visiting, and had run out of 
weather and trip-related smalltalk.
"Yeah, I guess," I said, and nodded. I tried to make eye contact with them 
both. Sitting in front of me on the floor, leaning back against the couch, 
was my beautiful cousin Jessica, nineteen like me, who was wearing a 
tank-top that did little to conceal a delicious set of pert, stand-out 
breasts framed by her shoulder-length black hair. If I concentrated, I could 
keep from looking down her shirt and embarrassing everyone. I was good at 
focusing, but this was testing. The choice between pretending to be 
interested in this kind of chit-chat and finally seeing my favorite cousin 
had turned into all curves in the interval between letters was no choice at 
all. "I've been thinking of taking up smoking, now that I'm eighteen, try 
and put an end to this growth spurt."
I blinked. Where had that come from? The adults all looked at me, not sure 
whether to laugh or gasp in shock.
"It has been years," Jessica said, looking back over her shoulder at me. I 
had to turn to her, trying to meet her twinkling brown eyes, but there they 
were, just behind her chin, and I looked before I could stop. There was a 
bra, low on the breasts, but the cleft between the two was so smooth, the 
curves so delicious, when I looked back after what must only have been an 
instant I snapped my head and felt myself starting to blush.
"Yeah," I managed.
She smiled. "It's nice to see to see you again," she said. She looked across 
to her parents. "It's a shame you haven't had them over before."
I shifted in my seat, feeling my erection rise, twisting up in my shorts. I 
leaned forward for my Sprite, took a drink, sat back, a little more 
comfortable now. Jessica talked to my parents about her college plans, my 
college plans, something else I couldn't concentrate on, and I drank my 
Sprite and looked around the room when my concentration waned, anything but 
stare at Jessica. My uncle kept getting me more Sprite, and before too long 
I was battling a wicked erection and a pain in my bladder, unable to get up 
or stay there, downing more cans nervously. When I finally convinced my 
erection nothing was doing and it started to calm, I was able to walk down 
the hall to the bathroom.
I sighed with relief as I pushed the door shut and saw myself in the mirror. 
I looked terrible, stressed and in pain. I pulled my half-limp dick out of 
my shorts and let loose an epic piss, the most relaxing I've ever had, and I 
felt then that everything would be okay. We'd be here for two days, nothing 
was going to happen, and I'd go home where I could lust after people not 
related to me. It was going to be fine. I took a deep breath as I finished 
and thought it through it again: it was going to be fine. I reached for the 
lever.

Jessica blew through the door, and as I looked over, my heart skipped a 
beat. I would never, ever, live this down. I was stunned, standing there, 
jaw open, dick out and in hand, looking like an idiot. I was never going to 
get through.
"Oh!" she said, jumping, her face going back in shock. She put a hand to her 
chest, and tried not to but then looked down. "I'm -- oh." She tore herself 
away from looking at what I was holding and concentrated on my face. "I'm 
sorry, I'll --"
"It's allright, I'm uh, done, so..."
She looked down again. "Wow," she said. She didn't move. My pulse was 
pounding.
"What?"
Instead of coming to, backing out the door, she took the step forward, 
looking at me, my penis, me. "It's... can I?" She put a hand out, low, and I 
gulped, taking shallow breaths. She wrapped her long hand around the shaft. 
Her hand was cool but I hardly noticed.
"My ex-boyfriend's wasn't ever this long, and you're... " she was still 
looking down at her grasping hand and then at me. I could see her nipples 
through two layers of clothing, rising and falling with her short breaths. 
"I..."
"Maybe you should get the door," I said, and then realized that while a 
practical idea, I might have just blown everything.
"Yes," she said, and closed it, then pushed on it until it latched with a 
loud click. She smiled at me. "You have to push it all the way," she said. 
"I should have told you." She started to laugh nervously but stopped.
I didn't know what to say. My prick was starting to rise again, and I was 
standing there in the cold bathroom, balls out, not knowing what to do.
"Let me just.." Jessica said, coming back to me. She put her hand back on 
it. Now that I was erect, her hand barely wrapped. It's never mattered 
before, but I was well-endowed, maybe a full ten inches when I was dying for 
it. I was dying for it. I felt like my boner wanted to jump out of skin too 
tight for it, and I could feel everything about her touch, the way she held 
me just tightly enough to let me know she meant it, her soft hands.
"Yes," she said. "Can I help you with this?"
"Please," I said.
Jessica smiled her killer smile at me, put the seat and seat-top down and 
sat down on the john. Her smile was just above my tip as I looked down. She 
worked my shaft slowly, looking up at me for approval, which I was too 
blissed-out to give. She started to jerk me with two hands, breathing hard, 
her whole body moving as she worked my hard-on, and I started to groan and 
move with her hands, closing my eyes and looking up, stretching my neck. She 
glared at me to be quiet and I nodded, brought back to the room. She moved 
faster, both hands gripping me tightly, and when I looked down she had her 
lips open and was staring at the clear semen starting to leak. The room 
smelled of my erection and her own arousal. It was a cramped, tiled heaven.
"Can I..." she asked, not looking up.
"Yes," I said.
Jessica popped the head into her mouth and started to work up and down, 
pausing to lick around the head, still working the shaft with one hand and 
cupping my balls with the other. After only a few seconds I knew I wasn't 
going to be able to hold on any longer.
"I'm gonna --" I whispered, and she worked fast, moving to lick me up and 
down my shaft, and then working my record hard-on with both slick hands and 
bobbing her head frantically on my head. I tried to swallow my groans of 
pleasure. Jessica came off for just a second and I could feel her breath 
cool across my spit-slick head, her hands still moving fast, and I shot the 
first burst of semen across her lips.
She let out a half-yelp, put her lips around my head as I kept coming, and 
kept jerking me like a hose until I stopped twitching. I was breathing hard, 
my teeth aching, feeling as if I'd dried up entirely, and looked at Jessica, 
still sitting in front of me, licking and sucking on my dick, popping the 
head in and out of her mouth, stroking me slowly with her off hand, and I 
saw her right hand was down in her shorts as she rubbed herself. I reached 
down and worked her tank-top and then her bra off. She never stopped rubbing 
herself and only let go of my dick to let her shirt off.
Her breasts were just as beautiful as I could have hoped, almost moving up 
as if they were happy to be free, and her nipples were amazing, wide, 
aroused areolas around bubble-gum pink beauties out in the air. I could feel 
another erection just beginning. Jessica was rubbing faster and was making 
low moans herself. She stared at my dick as she stopped sucking, her hips 
starting to buck with her hand, still pulling on me with her other hand.
"So big," she said. "Oh, Jack.. so... big." She put her mouth back down on 
my dick and started to go down on the shaft as far as she could, faster and 
faster, her left hand holding the shaft at the base, and I could feel her 
moan as she went down on me, until finally she stiffened, gave an audible 
groan of pleasure, and suddenly I was coming in her mouth again, without 
warning, and she moaned with me, bucking her hips against her hand as she 
sat, until finally she sat back, half-naked, sweating, and licked her lips.
"Wow," she said in a whisper. She blinked and smiled at me.
"That was amazing," I said.
"Oh yeah." She nodded. She finally took her hand off my hilt, almost 
reluctantly. "How do I look?"
"Beautiful," I said honestly. I pulled up my shorts and buttoned the fly. 
Jessica put her top back on and pocketed the bra.
She smiled wider. "I think we should leave. I look worse than you, so I'm 
just going to go to bed. Clean up as best you can, go back, excuse yourself, 
and then come see me."
I stared at her. "What? I don't think."
She shook her head. "We have to. I have to. If I don't, I'm never going to 
let myself forget it. I'll wonder forever. You'll wonder forever. I need to 
feel you, and I'll bet you need to know what I feel like."
I stood there, leaning back against the counter, feeling my clothes cling to 
me with sweat, and couldn't think of what to do next.
"You need to get out there," she whispered quickly. "They're going to start 
making jokes about you falling in soon. We can discuss this later."
She got up, kissed me on the cheek, and left quickly. I turned the fan on, 
found some Lysol and sprayed it everywhere to try at least conceal the 
scent, washed my face, tried to unmuss my hair, and went back out to the 
parents.
"You okay, Jack?" my dad asked me, setting down his glass of wine. "We were 
worried you might--"
"I don't feel so good," I said. I tried to look embarrassed and pained at 
once, looking around the room as if I didn't want to talk about, but should 
mention it. "I think lunch isn't agreeing with me."
"I'm always telling you not to eat the French dip," my mom said, knowingly. 
The others nodded at her. "Maybe you should go to bed."
"Yeah. Yeah, that's a good idea. Where am I sleeping?" I said, immediately 
thinking that the answer might not matter.
"Downstairs, in the family room -- the couch pulls out, I've put sheets out 
for you," my aunt said. Jessica's bedroom was downstairs.
I nodded, excused myself, and found the family room. I pulled the couch out, 
stood there for a minute, thought, went to the blankets, tossed them on the 
crappy mattress. I wasn't going to sleep well anyway, I thought, and feeling 
the steel supporting rods wasn't going make it any easier. I sat in the dark 
for a minute, and then went down the hall.
I knocked softly on Jessica's door.
"Come in," she said.
I entered. She was lying forward in bed, book up against the footboard, 
reading. Her body had a smooth arc, like the inscribed curve of the horizon, 
the barest of arches, and looking at her there, smiling, her hair tied back 
in an elastic, I was happy but afraid, because I knew nothing I was going to 
say really mattered.
"Hi," I said, and then grimaced. I sat down on the bed, back to the 
headboard. Jessica's feet laid on the pillow next to me.
"How are you doing?" I asked. I took one of her feet in hand and started to 
rub it gently.
"Fine, thanks. That's nice."
I nodded, searching for some way to make this less awkward.
"I'm sorry about what happened," I said.
"No you're not," Jessica replied, closing her book. "You're sort of scared, 
like I am, and maybe you wish you hadn't gotten into the situation in the 
first place, like I do, but you're not sorry for what happened."
"No," I said. "I'm not. But it was the right thing to say."
"Jack, look. I've loved you for years, you've loved me for years, we've 
always been warm towards each other, but we're not going to go out. Other 
foot."
I switched feet.
"We're never going to get married," she continued. "All we have is tonight. 
But we can do this, for one night, because it's good, Jack, it feels so 
good. This has to be."
"It did feel good," I said. "And we can get married in some states. Alabama, 
I think."
Jessica laughed. "We're not getting married," she said. "You're a good 
foot-rubber. Can you turn off the lights? Switch is behind you."
I did.
"Now take off your shirt," she said, moving at the other end of the bed.
I did.
"You get yours?" I asked.
"Yes," she said, as if the answer were obvious.
I felt her then, just above me, her breasts just touching my stomach, barely 
touching as she came towards me, and it felt like she was running 
electricity through me. All the little hairs in little hair places came off 
my skin, and when she came up to eye level, she put her weight on me, and I 
could feel her soft breasts pushed against me, and as I ran my hands up her 
strong legs to her stomach, we both sighed in pleasure. She looked up at me 
and I kissed her softly, and then she kissed me sweetly, and then harder, 
and we kissed longer and deeper, and I caressed  her body, moving my hands 
up her legs under her shorts to hold her taunt cheeks, moving her up to sit 
on my stomach.
At last, I got to cup both breasts in my hands, and it felt wonderful, 
perfectly sized to fit in my hands. I leaned up to take one and then the 
other into my mouth, kissing and then teasing her nipples as she made soft 
noises over me. Still sucking gently, I pulled her loose shorts off with her 
underwear, and she helped me wiggle them off. I rolled over, cupping her 
breasts - she was smiling down at me with a mischievous, expectant grin, and 
I obliged, moving down to kiss her thighs, my hands under her ass.
"Oh, come on," Jessica said, laughing.
I moved in and kissed down from her stomach to her clitoris. The smell was 
intoxicating, and as I softly kissed my way further down, I found that I 
could hardly restrain myself, because her sweet taste was more than I could 
bear. As I licked around her lips and moved into her with my tongue, Jessica 
started to writhe and my own arousal was starting to come out of my shorts 
on its own, poking the head out the waistband as if to get a look around. I 
kissed her clitoris softly, and then worked around it, until finally she 
leaned forward to put a hand on my head, keeping me at it, and shuddered 
again and again, gasping. She let go of my head and fell back.
"Jack," she said. "Wow." She looked at me in the dim room and her eyes were 
alight. "Lay down," she said. I did. I could still taste her on my lips. She 
was still delicious.
Jessica moved down on me, pulling my shorts off, and then rubbing my 
erection gently, slowly. It was beautiful torture. She would slowly increase 
her pace until I started to move myself or groan, and then slow way back 
down. She would look at me, smiling, trying to judge my facial expression so 
as not to go too far, drawing it out for as long as she could. It felt like 
an hour there on my back, on the verge of orgasm, before she let go and 
pulled herself up my body until we were nearly even, her head above me, the 
tip of my penis hot against her slick lips. I brought my hands around from 
her shoulders to her hips. We were both breathing quickly. I smiled at her.
"Anything else you want?" she said.
Her hips in hand, I pushed up and into her. We both moved together, 
foreheads just touching, and moaned. It was the most incredible sensation 
ever, all of my skin tingling, the warmth spreading from my loins through my 
blood like I was on fire.
"Oh Jessica," I said. "I can't believe it."
She rubbed her forehead across my cheek. "Ah."
I blinked and stiffened. "Is this safe?"
Jessica looked at me, serious. "I'm on the pill," she said. "I used to have 
the worst cramps..." she closed her eyes and sighed. "I'm sorry, that's not 
very romantic. Are you?"
"Clean, yes," I said. "I.. Very rarely, and never as good as this."
She drew up so I almost fell out and then slowly moved back down on me, and 
I rose to meet her. It felt better than the first entrance. "Good to know," 
she said. "You feel so good."
"I'm not going to be able to take much more of this," I whispered, biting 
her earlobe. She came up, her breasts sliding across my sweaty chest, and 
then we came back together.
"It's okay," she said. "Neither will I." She moved up, slowly, both of us 
savoring the move, and paused. As she moved down I came inside her, long and 
then over and over, and the electricity across my skin seemed to go with it, 
leaving me in bed, with fire in my veins, my heart bounding, panting.
"That was nice," Jessica said. "Hold on a second." She leaned back, and then 
ground herself against the base of my cock, rubbing back and forth until she 
bit my shoulder as she came, like me, over and over, trying to choke her 
screams.
Then she rolled over and snuggled up to me. I put an arm around her and drew 
her closer. With her warm next to me I closed my eyes and happily fell 
asleep.

She pushed me off the bed at four in the morning. I woke up in midair, 
yelped, and smacked my head on the floor. She giggled and grinned.
"What? What?" I said, grabbing frantically for my clothes.
"Get back to the family room, Jack."
"Where?" I looked at her and my brain gave me a quick recap. "Holy shit!"
"There's not going to be much to say if they can't find you in the morning 
and you're in here, in these sheets."
I pulled my shorts on backwards and my shirt inside-out. "Okay, I'll, uh..." 
I had no idea what to say. I leaned over the bed and kissed Jessica softly.
"Yeah," I said. "Okay." I turned to go.
"I lied to you," she said.
My eyes went wide and I went cold. Lied about which part? I turned around.
"I said we only had last night."
"Huh?"
"We have tomorrow night, too," she said.
"Oh," I said, my jaw down, looking stupid.
"Think about that when your parents drag you to the winery or... or 
wherever."
I stood in her doorway, smiling like an idiot, nodding, my clothes on all 
wrong, looking at my favorite cousin naked, glowing, giving me the arched 
eyebrow and the look, and I laughed.
"I will," I said, and I did.


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