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Subject: {ASSM} <NEW>"Body Image" by Bernard Sagon 2/4 (MF, Rom)<*>
Date: Wed, 5 Apr 2000 07:10:04 -0400
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======================================================================
Disclaimer: The following story is a work of fiction and contains
sexually explicit adult material. If you are not an adult, do not
wish to view such material, or if such material is prohibited in
your locality, you should exit at this time. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
======================================================================
This is a copyrighted work of fiction and the author retains all
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======================================================================
BODY IMAGE - Part 2 of 4
By Bernard Sagon.
Copyright 2000 - All rights reserved.
Yesterday - Friday night:
-------------------------
He had been standing at her apartment door, returning her from
their latest date, when Caroline had impulsively made her move.
Brandon had kissed her goodnight - not the safe brotherly kiss
he had first given her, but not exactly displaying the height of
passion either. Caroline held him to herself and this time,
instead of releasing him when the kiss was over, she continued
holding on, her arms around him.
"I'd like to thank you for a wonderful time," she said, looking up
into his eyes. "Would you like to come in for a nightcap?"
Like a true gentleman, Brandon replied, "Are you sure? It is a bit
late."
"I insist," Caroline replied, smiling. "I am my own woman. I am
not some high school girl whose parents are waiting inside. And
you're overdue for sampling my bartending skills."
"Just one then," Brandon replied, returning her smile. He watched
her unlock her door and followed her into her apartment, shutting
the door after them. She hung their coats on the rack beside the
door.
"Anything in particular I can interest you in?" she said, leading
him into the kitchen and opening one of the small cabinets above
the counter. "I have rum, gin, whiskey, some Scotch, and a bit of
tequila. Plus some assorted mixers in the fridge."
"How about something simple - rum and Coke maybe?"
"You've got it. Sit down and make yourself comfortable."
Caroline watched him nod his assent and return to the living room.
She then set about her task, first mixing Brandon a stiff drink,
adding almost two fingers of rum to the six ounce glass and filling
it with cola. Then she made another for herself, a bit weaker than
her companion's drink.
She was pleased when she re-entered the living room to see that he
had chosen to sit at one end of the sofa. She gave him her best
smile as she handed him his glass and then sat down next to him,
sharing his half of the seat. She let him take a pull on his
drink, then inquired, "Well, what do you think? Are my bartending
skills any good?"
"You sure don't fool around," he responded, taking a second
swallow. "It wouldn't take too many of these to lay a fellow out."
"Well, that isn't my intention. I'm hoping to keep you fully
conscious. I WANT you to know what I'm doing to you."
Brandon's eyebrows rose at that statement, but he made no move to
leave, took no action to dissuade her. A wordless agreement took
place between them. They both knew it and, having agreed silently
to continue, Brandon was able to relax. Their conversation turned
light - a comfortable banter taking place as they worked on their
drinks and discussed their evening.
Caroline was the first to finish her drink, placing her glass on
the end table next to her. The moment had finally arrived.
Caroline took the now almost-empty glass from Brandon's hand and
placed it next to hers. She turned back to the man beside her and,
leaning into him, kissed him open-mouthed, her tongue slipping
through her lips to pass between his. He responded to her, kissing
back, abandoning the gentlemanly type of kisses they had previously
shared. His right hand slid up to the small of her back, pulling
her closer. They broke from the kiss just long enough to take a
breath, and then their lips became joined once more. This kiss was
deeper and more impassioned, the heat between them rising as
Brandon's hand moved from her back until his palm lightly cupped
her left breast. Caroline offered no protest, and made no effort
to remove his hand. Instead, she bit down lightly on his lower lip
as their tongues flirted with each other. Finally she broke from
him, and slipping to her knees before him, her fingers went to the
buckle on the belt around his waist.
She unbuckled his belt, then unbuttoned the waistband of his pants
and lowered his zipper. She slid both her hands under his
buttocks, indicating that he should rise. He was quick to pick up
on her prompting and raised his hips as she grasped his waistband
and the elastic of his underwear, lowering his trousers and
allowing his semi-rigid cock to spring free.
Brandon groaned softly as her lips slide over the head of his
manhood. "Damn, that's good," he murmured to her as she commenced
ministering to his cock. Her lips slid up and down the hardening
organ, her tongue swirling over the sensitive head at the top of
each bob of her head.
Caroline smiled at his reaction. She was an experienced oral
lover, and was totally confident in her blowjob abilities. No
matter what happened another day - no matter how badly any later
encounter went - she knew that at least he would remember this night
and how well she had done this. His hands once more sought her
body, but she wasn't ready for that, and she deflected them by
bringing her own hands up, encircling the base of his penis with her
fingers. He was forced to settle for placing his hands on her
shoulders and guiding her movements as she blew him.
A change in his responses - an involuntary matching of his thrusts
into her accepting mouth with the rise and fall of her head -
signaled the approach of Brandon's orgasm. Caroline read the
signals of his impending release and responded to them, engulfing
more of his shaft on each down-stroke until she was deep-throating
him, her lips circling the base of his cock, her saliva dampening
her fingers as they grasped him.
"Oh God, Caroline," he groaned. "I can't hold out much longer.
I'm going to have to cum soon."
Caroline replied by sliding her lips back up his cock to just below
the ridge at the bottom of his cockhead, running that sensitive
area in and out of her lips and mouth, providing maximum sensation
to him. That produced exactly the effect she sought. With a loud
groan Brandon came, his first spray hitting the back of her tongue
to be followed by several more as she continued her intense
stimulation. She allowed some of his cum to leak from her mouth
and down her chin, knowing that seeing the overflow of his semen
had a powerful erotic effect on a man. As the bursts tapered off,
she once more engulfed the majority of his cock, applying suction
and swallowing his seed. When his orgasm was finally over, she
looked up at him - just the tip of his cockhead between her
cum-coated lips - with a smile on her face.
"I've been wanting to do this since almost our first date," she
said. "I couldn't wait any longer."
"You don't hear me complaining," he said, his face still flushed.
"Now it's your turn. Come up here where I can touch you."
Her response was not what he was expecting.
"I think we should wait," she said. Then she lowered he head a bit
and continued, "We need to talk. It's important. There is a lot
you don't know about me."
He chuckled, "Don't be silly. I'm dying to make love to you. What
kind of secrets could you possibly have?"
Caroline realized that she had been fooled by his always
gentlemanly manners. She had but to look at him - at his still
present erection - to see that she had seriously misjudged his
staying power. She had initiated this encounter. Could she deny
him now?.
She surrendered to the inevitable. "If you don't want to wait, at
least let me change first. Please? I need to do this my way."
"Whatever you want," Brandon replied, thrown by her request. "Take
as much time as you need."
"Thank you," she responded. "You'll understand everything when I
get back."
Rising from her knees, she went to her bedroom, Brandon's eyes
following her as she exited the room and closed the bedroom door.
He leaned back on the sofa feeling totally confused. He was
strongly attracted to Caroline - strongly aroused by the thought of
making love to her. Now that the moment had arrived, he suddenly
found himself unable to comprehend the events taking place around
him. She was obviously willing, having initiated the blowjob he
had just received. Why was she so nervous?
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Damn! That sure could have been handled better!" Caroline thought
as she latched the door behind her. Her self-criticism continued,
"I should have waited until I'd told him - until after he knew.
What will he do now when he finds out?"
Caroline felt trapped. All she had wanted to do was give him a
blowjob - to show him she was still a sexual being. She had let
her desire cloud her better judgment. Now he wanted more from
her. "I should have foreseen that," she told herself. He wanted
it all. And Caroline knew she would give him what he desired.
It was too late to back out now. She had committed herself.
She began removing her clothing. First was her skirt, followed by
the high-necked white sweater. Then she sat on the end of her bed
and removed her shoes. She stood back up and, hooking her thumbs
under the elastic at her waist, slid her pantyhose down her shapely
legs. She stepped out of them, kicking them to the side. She wore
just one remaining article of clothing. She could see herself in
her vanity mirror as she unhooked the back of the hated padded bra
and threw it on the bed. She shuddered slightly at her reflected
image and, retrieving the heavy terry robe hanging in her closet,
covered herself.
The moment of truth had arrived, coming much sooner than she was
prepared for. Caroline steeled herself and, taking hold of the
doorknob before her, reentered her living room.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Caroline found Brandon still sitting at the end of the sofa, his
underwear and trousers where she had left them, just below his
knees. She smiled slightly. At least he had not left, although
there was no guarantee that he didn't regard her as a madwoman.
She stood before him, her arms folded across her chest.
"Well, I'm back," she said, tentatively.
"So I see."
"Would you mind doing me a big favor?" she said, trying to delay
the inevitable. "I'm really nervous about this. Could you undress
first?"
He looked at her, perplexed, then shrugged and said, "Sure. No
problem."
Brandon watched her mouth a silent "Thank you" as he began
disrobing before her. He removed his shoes and socks, followed by
his underwear and trousers. Moving on, he unbuttoned the cuffs of
his shirt and the buttons down the shirt's front. He removed the
shirt, tossing it into the opposite corner of the sofa. Then
removing his undershirt, he casually leaned back in his seat, nude
before her, awaiting her inspection.
"O.K. I'm done. Now it's your turn."
Caroline tensed, her nervousness showing. "I have to warn you.
I'm not what you might be expecting. I hope you'll try to
understand."
"Well, I'm trying," he said, his confusion growing. "What could
possibly be such a big concern?"
"You don't understand," she replied, breaking eye contact with him.
"How should I do this?" she wondered, her memories of past attempts
with other men providing no guidance. All of those attempts had
ended in disaster. Finally, saying a silent prayer of "Please
God... " and throwing caution to the wind, she told Brandon, "Maybe
it would be best if I just show you."
Still not making eye contact with him, looking at the floor in
front of his feet, she fumbled with the belt of the terry robe
protecting her. Slipping it off her shoulders with both hands,
she allowed it to fall to the floor around her feet. She stood
before him naked, exposed, her secret revealed to his unprepared
eyes.
Throughout high school and college she had been so proud of her
body. She had exercised regularly. She had watched her diet.
Her reward had been a five-foot seven-inch figure that had never
failed to turn men's heads. "If Brandon could only have seen me
then!" she thought. Instead, she stood before him, the proud
thrust of her left breast mocking her. Surgical scars marked her
loss, her right nipple off-center and displaced downward slightly,
out of line with its unmarred companion. Only that and loosened
flesh remained to mark where her right breast had once been,
before the mastectomy that had taken it. Caroline had survived
her cancer, but not intact - not as a whole woman.
She finally looked up to gauge his reaction, fearing what she would
find in his expression, and found all her fears confirmed. Shock
was plain on Brandon's face. He was unable to keep his eyes off
the scarred flesh that marked her missing breast. Finally, she saw
him brace himself, and stood impassively as he came to her and
enfolded her in his arms.
"It's O.K., Caroline," he said, his arms encircling her. "It
doesn't matter." He loosened his hold on her and sought her mouth
with his lips.
But Caroline knew that it did matter. He had managed to recover
well, but the mood in the room had changed in the moment when he
first beheld her misshapen body. He was holding her, but his grip
was tentative and awkward. Still, he was trying. He would do what
was expected of him. He caressed the skin of her back as he kissed
her, his hands sliding up and down her naked flesh.
Only Caroline could not avoid noticing that his hands never moved
toward her chest or nipples.
Brandon managed to maneuver her around and backed her to the sofa,
where he sat her down and, pressing back on her shoulders, leaned
her against the cushions. He knelt at her feet and, spreading her
knees with his hands, placed his head between her legs and began
kissing her inner thighs. Finally, getting down to the job at
hand, he snaked his tongue between the lips of her pussy.
Caroline let out an agonized groan. It was so long since she had
last had sex. She responded strongly, driven by the desire she
felt toward the man whose mouth feasted between her legs. She
grasped his head and pulled him into her vagina, steering his
tongue into the most secret recesses of her being as her lust
built toward its inevitable release.
"Oh God! Eat me. Don't stop. Make me cum. I need to cum so bad!"
Brandon redoubled his efforts, his fingers opening her pussy lips
as she spread her legs wider for him. He ran his tongue from the
base of her vulva to her pubic hair, rasping his tongue's surface
across her clitoris on each upstroke until she suddenly tensed,
clutching him with her thighs as a spasm shook her body, her juices
on Brandon's tongue marking her orgasm. Several more spasms racked
her body before she relaxed, her release over.
Brandon slipped from between her legs and sat next to her on the
sofa. Once more he kissed her softly on the mouth. She responded
by sliding her hand up his thigh until her fingers circled his
erection. She then moved herself over him, straddling him while
he held her waist, guiding her as she directed his cock between her
pussy lips and into her awaiting vagina. She slid down its rigid
length, a moan rising from deep in her throat.
She began to ride him slowly, ascending and descending on the cock
impaling her, almost its entire length slipping in and out of her
tight wetness. Brandon's eyes widened as a frenzy began to
overtake her. Caroline became a banshee as she rode him, her
juices foaming around his cock as she drove herself and him toward
orgasm. There was nothing he could do but lay back and let the
pressure in his groin built toward its release.
"Oh Jesus, I'm going to cum again, Caroline. I can't hold back."
"Oh please, Brandon! Cum in me. I want it so bad. If only just
this once, I want to feel you cum in me."
They exploded together. She could feel him stiffen and fill her
with his sperm as he repeatedly came within her vaginal walls. Her
own climax overtook her and she let loose with a high-pitched wail
as she joined her partner. She clung to him as she came, hanging on
for dear life as their release peaked, then tapered down and faded.
They remained like that until Brandon lost his erection and slipped
out of her flooded pussy, their combined juices leaking from her
vagina and down over his pubic hair.
An awkward silence hung between them. They finally broke it,
saying all the expected things to each other - about how good it
had been and how they had both wanted it, but Caroline was able to
read between the lines. Always the gentleman, Brandon had done
what he had to do, but during all their intimacies, from the point
when he had first seen her nude, he never touched even her single
intact breast. He had done his duty, but she knew that he wouldn't
be staying the night.
"I'll call you tomorrow," he said as he was putting his clothing
back on.
"I'll be waiting," Caroline responded, knowing that at least she
was telling the truth. She now sat in a separate chair, her terry
robe wrapped tightly around her once more as she struggled to keep
up a brave front. She was now ashamed of herself; ashamed that she
had willingly - even desperately - accepted what she could only
describe to herself as a "pity fuck". She had not been able to
help herself. It had been such a long time and she had wanted
Brandon so much. She had wanted to believe that this time the
fairy tale might come true.
But it seemed that Cinderella's carriage had returned to being a
pumpkin once again.
She saw Brandon to the door. He removed his coat from the rack and
donned it, then politely kissed her good night before exiting,
returning to the platonic, brotherly type of kiss he had given her
at the end of their first date. It was not the kind of kiss she
longed for from a lover. She heard the soft click of the latch as
he exited, pulling the door shut behind him.
Slipping the safety chain into place, Caroline turned slowly from
the closed door and headed toward the bathroom, feeling defeated.
She needed to bathe - she could feel the mixture of Brandon's semen
and her own orgasmic fluids running down her inner thighs. She
started the shower, adjusting the temperature to near-scalding.
Slipping off her robe, she entered the shower and begun soaping
her body - soaping her one breast and the empty space on her chest
where it's twin had once been. A sob racked her body and tears
begun running down her creeks, mingling with the water from the
showerhead above her.
======================================================================
Today - Saturday evening:
-------------------------
Time passed, the minutes ticking away, and still the phone refused
to ring. Caroline could feel her hopes fading and the darkness
closing in on her. She had thought Brandon might be different.
She had hoped...
======================================================================
Several years ago:
------------------
She did not always feel like this, even at the beginning, when she
first learned of her disease. She had maintained her spirits
during those trying early days.
It had been Tom, her live-in boyfriend, who first discovered the
lump. She was taking her morning shower before going to work when
she became aware of his presence in the bathroom. She smiled to
herself as she watched the indistinct figure on the other side of
the shower door remove the pajama bottoms that were his only
clothing. He then approached the shower and cracked it open,
slipping in behind her as he closed the door.
Caroline squealed when he surrounded her with him arms and, pulling
her body back against his, pressed the smooth wet skin of her
buttocks and back into the hairy flesh of his chest and abdomen.
She felt his pubic hair tickling the crack of her ass and his
flaccid penis nestling into the space between her ass cheeks.
"Cut that out, Tom. You're going to make me late for work."
"So don't go," he replied. "It's not fair that you have to work on
Saturday. None of the other people in your office do."
"None of those other people are going to be the first female junior
partner in the firm's history. I am. Now let me finish my hair."
"I'll help you," he replied, moving his hands up to her head to
caress her tresses as the shampoo foam ran down her shoulders and
over her back and up-thrust breasts. She giggled as his fingers
followed the stream of suds down along the side of her neck and
around to her front. His slippery hands kneaded the flesh of her
breasts, causing her to sigh softly as he rolled her nipples
between his thumbs and forefingers.
"I told you, we don't have time for this."
"Mmmmm," he replied, nuzzling her neck. His fingers continued
sliding over her soapy tits, massaging the yielding flesh.
She sensed the change in his caress before she actually felt it.
He stopped rolling her nipples, the fingers of his right hand
pressing more intently into the lower curve of her right mammary.
"Damn!" he exclaimed, "I thought I felt something."
Caroline tensed as she felt his fingers pressing into her,
searching the flesh just above where her breast met her chest
wall. His fingers zeroed in - pressing into a single spot - almost
pinching the skin beneath his fingers.
"Caroline, give me your hand," he commanded softly, all playfulness
gone from his voice.
Nervously, she obeyed him. She held her right hand out for him to
take. His masculine hand covered her smaller feminine one, guiding
it as he moved her fingertips to her chest and across the slick
undersurface of her right breast, his fingers pressing hers into
the flesh beneath.
At first she felt nothing, then, as Tom slowly slid her fingers over
her skin, she suddenly became aware of a hardness - a lump about a
half-inch in diameter buried in the fatty tissue exposed to her
touch.
"Did you feel it too?" he asked, concern filling his voice.
"Yes," she replied, her own voice wavering. "I can feel something
inside me. What do you think it is?"
He tried to reassure her - to clam her fears. "I'm sure it's
nothing serious. Probably just a cyst. My mother had one of those
once. They're nothing."
She responded to his encouraging words and his strong arms around
her. "Then you think it's O.K.? I don't have to worry about it?"
"I didn't say that," he replied, softly shaking his head. "I'm
saying you shouldn't worry unnecessarily, that's all."
She tensed at his response. Finally she asked, "So what should I
do?"
"I'd make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.
You'll feel much better once you know it really is nothing."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
She had made the appointment at his insistence. Looking back on it
later, she would recognize that she had entered a state of denial.
She took a day off from work, annoyed by the inconvenience. She
entered Angel Memorial Hospital on Tom's arm, braced for her
meeting with Danielle Marsh, her doctor. Dr. Marsh had previously
examined Caroline in her office, carefully determining the size and
extent of the lump and ordering a full set of mammograms. She now
joined Caroline in the day surgical unit where she calmly and
professionally explained the biopsy procedure as she preformed it,
using a needle that looked the size of a soda straw to Caroline,
who winced as she felt it penetrate the skin of her breast and
traverse the underlying fatty tissue and milk glands until it was
lodged in the lump. Then the biopsy needle retreated the way it
had come, with Caroline feeling its entire journey despite the
local anesthetic that dulled the sensation and the pain. The
needle disappeared into the hands of a nurse, who carried it from
the day surgical unit for its trip to the hospital's laboratory.
Dr. Marsh told her that she would be able to give Caroline the
results within only a few hours.
As Caroline tried to lie back in the recovery room, all her fears
arose to confront her. Even when Tom joined her and held her
close, she was unable to free her mind of the dark "what ifs" that
filled it. Although she had hardly slept the night before, she was
not able to relax. The not knowing was almost more than she could
stand.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
(End of part 2 of 4)
bernard_sagon@hotmail.com
--
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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