case in point, carlee at 14:

i suppose i was sexy, many told me that, my boobs had grown out of a b-cup, but not into a c, maybe a b and a half. my face was alright, i thought, a few blemishes here and there, but i doctored them well and if they were too noticible there was always clear-o-sil to mask the bad spots over. i liked the way i looked in a full length mirror, not as curvatious as i wanted to be, but i think anyway could tell that i wasn't a boy.

i had began to take on a few jobs around to buy a few extras for myself. the colonel was big on this independance stuff, and frankly-i kind of liked the idea myself. most of my jobs were around the neighborhood, cleaning out gardens, and other light yard work. i loved working with flowers, i fancied myself as a flourist when i grew up. i was asked to baby sit a very sweet 3 year old by her mom, mrs. walsh, but i had so little contact with babies, that i declined until i talked it over with my dad. the walsh's were a couple in their early forties, maybe, who lived a couple of blocks from us. i did speak with my dad about, and the colonel said "of course carlee, why in a few years you will be thinking about having children yourself. get all the experience you can dear." dad was always so very practicle, if he didn't believe in anything else, he believed in studying hard and learning. he believed that we were born brain dead-- "a congenital disease cured only by education and hard work." i always thought of him as general george s. patton when he went on this particular tyrade, he was so so serious. god, i loved him, in my fashion. i loved his solidarity and i wished he could have loved me more, but, i knew he was doing the best that he could, and that was alright.

when mrs. walsh phoned me on thursday night, asking if i could watch chelsey for a few hours the next night, i told her that i would be delighted.

"now david can pick you up around six, no problem, and please call me marsha." i had met chelsey one morning at the tennis court. there was a lady that saw to her in the daytime when "marsha" worked (which wasn't very often) the two of them work walk around the neighborhood, chelsey seemed like a very nice little girl.

the next night, mr. walsh knocked on the door about 5:45. the colonel answered it.

"hi, i'm david walsh, is carlee ready?" dad looked so funny, the expression on his face, it was like this man were taking me out on a date or something.

"he's picking me up to baby sit chelsey dad." a look of realism reappeared.

"oh...."

"your beer is in the freezer dad, it will be ready when the timer dings."

"oh, thanks carlee, 15 minutes?"

"yeah, 15 minutes.." he was such a creature of habit, a budweiser in a can, chilled in the freezer for 15 minutes, ready at 1800 hours. it was his way, and i didn't mind, in fact sometimes, i rather enjoyed it. noone could accuse the colonel of "debauchery", but he loved his quiet moments like everyone else.

david walsh was--wow!--what could you say......for a guy his age, he looked great. tall tanned and beautiful, i was impressed. he made me weak actually, and he had the greatest smile. he was dressed in a dark suit with a red tie, i assumed he and his wife were going some where special. we engage on light conversation relative tothe neighborhood. he told me that he had watched me playing tennis back in the spring. hormones got to flowing. he didn't say that i played a good game, so all i could assume is that he was watching me.....

at their house, i met mrs. walsh ""marsha" and miss wolfenbarker the lady that walked around with chelsey. i suppose she was going off duty, and i was coming on. marsha was attractive, but not sexy or aluring, her voice was pleasant but there was a ring to it that i didn't like. david was a foot taller than her and another five inches taller than me.

then, chelsey appeared, clad in a pink pair of pajamas and looking very sweet. she was very verbal for a three year old, and quite easy to understand. marsha told me that chelsey would watch cinderella tonight ("for the 300th time" david interjected)

"oh, that's alright, i've only seen it 200 times" i said. that got a smile out of everyone, including chelsey. the walsh's said that they would be home by eleven, and i nodded in acknowledgment. then, it was me and chelsey, against the world.

cinderella was boring (as usual) but it kept the little girl quiet. actually, she was very sweet, and very intelligent--maybe walt disney was the curer of brain death. about 9:30, she got sleepy, and i took her to bed. she was asleep before i got her to her room. she looked so sweet.

i went back downstairs and sat on the hugh sectional couch, and turned on the tv. i scanned the channels from 0 to 99. the colonel always hated that, he liked to watch the news on tv, but the rest of the channels shoveled shit in louisanna, according to him.

maybe i would call him, tell him about my evening, no, he was in bed at 2100 i wouldn't disturb him. i watched mtv for a little while, no one was on that i liked, i lay my head back on this luxerious sofa, and took a cat nap. it was 9:48 when i awakened, i was scared, i ran upstairs to check on chelsey, she was peaceful in her sleep. thank god....

at 10:30, the walsh's came home. marsha looked very stoned, david, a little behind her.

"did chelsey do alright carlee?" marsha said, her speech was slurred.

"she did fine marsha, no problem."

"i'll drive you home carlee." he said

"you're in no condition to drive!!" marsha yelled as she ascended the staircase.

"i drove you home marsha!" no reply. david looked at me, his dark eyes gleaming with a sparkle to them. he looked dreamy. "well, aren't you the pretty one." he said with a crooked smile..

"i really must go now, mr. walsh."

"i know, hop in my chariot and i'll take you to the moon." we got into his car, mr. walsh and i, david and me....he seemed alright, a little jittery, but ok. "carlee, do you mind if we take a little drive?"

"where to?"

"oh, it's not far and i would enjoy your company, if you don't mind."

well, i had not indicated how late i would be, so i said sure and david hit the gas. he drove over the bridge into the indiana side of the ohio river, then turned left on a gravel road. the banks of the ohio are quite beautiful, the bottom is sand as are the beaches. it feels good against your feet. normally, the beaches (which may be a bad term, sand bars is better) are lit up with mercuryvapor lights, not on purpose, just part of the city lights. david had driven far beyond that, and turned left again onto a dark deserted sand bar. it was warm and the river had little current, the water flowed onto the shoreline, it smelled of fish. he stopped the car and rolled down his window-i did the same. the sound of crickets abounded, and the sweet smell of honeysuckle. it was so very quiet......

the quiet was suddenly blessed with the brilliant display of a shooting star. it lit up the heavens.

"do you know what that was carlee?" he asked.

"yes, a meteor, a very bright one."

"how many light years away?"

"oh, maybe a thousand miles, it's in our atmosphere."

"you are very smart dear, i would have gussed ten light years." i smiled. "do you know how far a light year is away?" i started to say 186,000 miles per second times---but i decided against it, i really didn't want to play this game..

"a long way, i suppose."

"sometimess i would like to be that far away carlee." i made no comment. "did you ever feel that life was passing you by?"

"nope, haven't experienced that much of it i guess." i really didn't want to continue with this conversation, so i got out of the car and walked over close to the water.

i took my sandles off the feel the wet sand, and knelt down to make myself more comfortable, then i sat down, i didn't mind getting my butt wet. it felt so cool and nice.....the heavens were alive, you could see sixth magnitude stars here. i heard his car door close, and he came down to me.

"can you tell directions by the stars carlee?"

"i can tell north."

"how?"

"well, that's the north star (i pointed.)"

"how did you find it?"

"by drawing an imaginary line from the bowl of the big dipper until you reach polaris."

"and that's north?"

"yes"

"always?"

"yes, it never moves, not in our lifetime anyway."

"could you teach me about the stars dear?"

"no, i can't, but there are many way that you can learn." i said stiffly.

"i don't have the time." he answered. oh my god, how many times have i heard that excuse for not willing to take the time to learn what's around us, and how very sad. i was beginning to feel like my dad.......

"i have to pee, do you mind?"

"no, go ahead." he unzipped his zipper, and pulled it out--it was huge, put bryan to shame, i could barely imagine, and he hadn't lied, he did have to pee. i'll bet it had been hours. i wanted to put my feet in front of that golden stream, it would have felt warm and good. i was beginning to feel wet.

david zipped up, and sat beside me. "i've got to work tomorrow and it's getting late, we should go."

"sure david."

"carlee, you are a bright and beautiful girl, may i kiss you?" before i had time to say yes, he did that, he put his arms around me and kissed me like i was the first girl he had ever kissed. his hands slipped under my tee shirt, and he felt of my back. they were so warm, so warm. i felt so special....a song came into my mind, i couldn't think of its name. i was getting carried away, and i knew it, tonight wasn't right, i did know that. i would remember this night though, for the rest of my life. god, i was so hungry to live and understand, and by god, time was not going to stand in the way......

as we sat there engaging in a kiss, i thought that maybe tonight was right afterall.

"carlee, lets move back behind that pile of brush over there, i've got to get out of these pants, my dick is breaking."

hmmmm, well, i wanted to and i didn't......having only a few seconds to weigh the good and the bad, i chose the bad, gave hima quick kiss on the lips and ran for the brush pile. david ran after me as quick as he could.

behind the brush pile was very grassy and very wet. i had left my sandles on the sand bar, and the grass actually felt cool. we sat down, and he slid out of his trousers and underware.

"god, that feels better." he said ---i had never imagined anything like this, it was hard and hugh---he pulled the foreskin back with his right hand, and said he was working a cramp out of it.

"maybe i could help with that david?" i said hungrily. he smiled, laid back on the grass and i put my hand around it, my hand barely fit around it. i worked the skin back and forth, back and forth. it was getting harder. he moaned. i felt his hand touch my crotch, and i gasped. i grabbed his balls with my other hand, and he moaned louder. he was trying to get his hand up the leg of my shorts, and wasn't having much luck. i unsnapped them, and unzipped them and pulled them off-along with my panities. he could feel me real good then, and he did.......such a funny feeling ran up my spine, it was thrilling.

"slow down honey." he said, and i did. i could see some stuff coming out of it, but i felt that i hadn't gone to far yet.

he got up and set between my legs, he put his hands and each of them and gently spread them apart, his right hand went down my leg, and he played with my foot.

"very nice." he said, then he put his head down and kiss the inner flesh of my thigh. he kissed down my leg until he got to my foot and even kissed it. i had never been so wet. he worked his way back up my other leg until he got to --well, you know--he sucked and licked and moaned and purred. when he did my clitoris, i almost came, it was so swollen and so sensitive. it definitely felt better, even better than his tongue in my vagina. inbetween after shocks, i wondered what he and marsha did in their bedroom, i was envious. he raised my top and flipped by b and a half bra up from my breasts and kneeded them until i felt my nipples would explode. suddenly he was on top of me, his thighs so warm against mine. he kissed me and began trying to get that monster in. he was four degrees to the left, so i positioned my right hand under my bottom, and pushed it four degrees to the right. bingo. it went in very well, he was so hot he burned me. further and further upward, until i could feel it hit my cervix, god, was that fireworks. he moved in and out, ever so gently, then picked up speed a little, it was wonderful. i knew that i would feel awful in the morning, but it was great now. he was about a centimeter away from my clit, and i wanted it there, i wasn't sure how to manage that (without coming out and asking him) so i manipulated downward somewhat, that didn't work, i then spread my legs further, and placed them on his back, heels dug into his butt- that did work. with a few more strokes, i felt that i was either going to die or cum, and fortunately it was the latter. i moaned so loud that i just knew that every fisherman on the ohio heard me, it came again, and i didn't care about my noise. i thought that i wasn't going to stop cumming, maybe it would last forever. finally it did stop, but then came the aftershocks; my girl friends didn't know what i was talking about when i tried to describe "after shocks" andmaybe i'm the only one that has them, they are mini-orgasms that i have after the major orgasm, and they are wonderful.

david kept on and on. sometimes, if i wiggled my butt just right, he would hhit a place deep in my vagina, that was especially thrilling, just every now and then. my legs were so sore, i had to let them down for a moment. i felt even wetter than when we started, perhaps some of his juices had mixed with mine. he kept stroking and i kept hunching forward, god, this was wonderful. a second orgasm swelled deep in my vagina, and i didn't fight it. just before it, i placed my legs around david as i had done before. perfect contact, a few more strokes before i would cum, and when it did, it felt so good i could cry. when it was halfway over, he came, i could feel the first spurt on my cervix, the second on that magical spot, the third fourth and fifth everywhere, and when it was over, i came a second time. he quit--

"please don't stop david! i'm in the middle of it!" i cried. he resumed his motion until i was through. i kissed him, i had to. it came out, and david laid on his back on the wet grass. it was half hard still, and slick and wet as i held it in my hand. i suddenly had the urge to put my mouth around it, so i did. i don't know why i wanted to do that, but i did. it tasted like me mainly, with a hint of salt. i wondered if david like that, but i didn't ask. it about filled my mouth, and it seemed to be getting harder. i stopped. it was late, i needed to get home, david needed to get home. david put his finger into my vagina, i was very still, then he rubbed it on my breasts, it felt good, i felt good.

we gathered up our clothes, and david drove me to my home.

"carlee, you won't tell anyone about what happened with us tonight, will you?"

"oh, i don't know david, when school starts, i might announce it over the pa." he smiled, he knew that i would remain silent. "what time is it david?" i asked

"it's close till two."

"oh, better run." i kissed him then got out of the car.

the colonel was asleep in his chair. he looked so peaceful. maybe his third tom collins had got to him, or maybe he was waiting up for his daughter. in either event, i lightly kissed him on the cheek, and headed to my bedroom. i was growing up, maybe too fast, but i was growing up at any rate. i thought about the stars that night, i thought and thought, then drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

carlee