“I’m telling you,” said Erica firmly, “once you’ve tried satin panties, you’ll never want to wear anything else. They’re so soft, and smooth, and shiny, and sexy … the way they feel on your…”
Tanya Morris quickly held up a hand. “All right!” she said. “I get the picture. I’ll go and buy some on Saturday, just to make you happy.”
Erica grinned. “You’ll be the one who’s made happy. Trust me.”
Tanya was sceptical, but in truth she was also a little intrigued. She had a pair of silk panties at home – they were smooth and shiny too, if not quite as much as satin… would satin really be so much better? Erica certainly seemed to think so…
Saturday rolled around, and Tanya rode the bus to the shopping precinct in the middle of town. Tall and leggy, with very long and very straight reddish-blonde hair, she was much admired by the boys at her school, and was always being asked out. But she had A-levels coming up, and they were her chief focus – she was determined to get into Oxford to study biochemistry. Until her exams were safely over, there would be no parties, no drinking … and definitely no boys.
It was only because most of her panties were getting rather shabby that she had even considered going out to buy some new ones today. She had happened to mention to Erica that she needed new undies, and Erica had immediately suggested satin, and then pestered her into promising that she would buy some.
So here she was, heading into Marks & Spencer to buy a few new pairs of panties – at least one of which, she was determined, would be satin. She made her way over to the lingerie section, and immediately noticed an unpleasant smell lingering in the area. “Yuck,” she thought to herself. “Someone farted.” She tried to breathe as little as possible, although as she moved among the racks of intimate apparel and became more accustomed to the smell, she noticed it less and less.
She picked out five pairs of cotton panties, and then muttered “Aha!” as she found a rack with a few pairs of panties with a glossy sheen that just had to be satin. The problem was, the only ones in her size were all either red or pink, the two colours she most despised. But then she spotted, in the next rack and clearly out of place among a collection of high-waisted cotton briefs, a single pair of white satin panties in the same design as the pink and red ones – and on a hanger clearly labelled with her size.
As she reached out for them, however, her eyes widened in shock. The rear of the panties was facing outwards, but it was not hanging flatly as it should have been. Instead it was bulging towards her, and it only took Tanya a fraction of a second to realise why. Either side of the elastic leg-bands, down near the gusset, a ginger-brown lump was protruding. Its fibrous, knobbly texture gave it away immediately: it was a human turd – and a large one at that. Possibly, judging by the size and lumpiness of the bulge, there were several in there.
Almost retching in disgust, Tanya backed away from the rack. It was obvious that this was where the smell had been coming from. It wasn’t a fart – someone had actually done a poo in those panties, and hung them back up! It was beyond disgusting – Tanya felt traumatized, and quite ill. She looked around and spotted a sales assistant.
“Excuse me,” she said. “Could you come and look at this, please?”
The young woman smiled, nodded, and came over to where Tanya was standing. Looking where her customer was pointing, she gasped as she saw the bulging panties. “Oh my God!” she said. “I’m so sorry – it looks like the Phantom Panty-Pooper has been at it again.”
“This has happened before?” asked Tanya in surprise.
“Oh yes,” said the sales assistant, who, according to her name tag, was called Ann. “And not just here. She’s struck in Top Shop and Debenhams, too. Possibly other places. This is the third time she’s done it in our shop. We’ve tried to catch her by looking at the CCTV footage, but she’s too clever.”
“Well, that’s all very interesting,” said Tanya, “but in the meantime, I was really hoping to get some white satin panties, and this seems to be the only pair in my size. Do you have more in the back somewhere?”
“I’m afraid not,” said Ann apologetically. “All of our lingerie is out here. If you can’t find any others in your size, then I’m afraid it means we’re out.”
“Damn,” said Tanya, and she sighed. “I really wanted a pair of nice satin panties.”
“Well I could give you these ones at a forty percent discount,” said Ann. “Since they’re … soiled. I’m sure they’ll be fine once they’re washed. Any decent stain remover should get rid of any traces of the, um, mess.”
Tanya shuddered, and tried to weigh up in her mind the pros and cons. On the one hand, she really wanted the panties, but on the other … some stranger had crapped in them! And she was not at all sure if they would be as comfortable as Erica seemed to think. Maybe the waistband would be scratchy, or something.
“If I’m going to buy a pair of panties that someone’s made a mess of,” she said, “I’d like to be very sure that they’re going to be comfortable.”
“Hmm,” said Ann. “Ordinarily we don’t allow customers to try on panties, for reasons of hygiene. In this case, however, I don’t suppose it matters too much. Go on then – tell Tracy I said it was okay.”
“Thanks,” said Tanya, draping the five pairs of cotton panties over one arm, and then carefully removing the satin panties from their hanger. They were heavier than she had expected – apparently there was even more poo inside them than she had realized. She gingerly carried them over to the changing rooms, where a middle-aged lady – Tracy, no doubt – stood behind the counter.
“I’m just going to try these panties on,” said Tanya, holding up the messy pair.
“Ugh!” said Tracy, horrified. “But they’re all … yuck! That bloody Phantom Panty-Pooper – just wait till I catch her in the act!”
“Can I go in then?” asked Tanya. “Ann said it would be all right, since they’re all ‘yuck’, as you say.”
“Certainly, certainly,” said Tracy. “You’ll have to leave the others here though.” She took the cotton pairs from Tanya’s arm, and then waved her onward.
Tanya entered the changing rooms and found all the cubicles empty. She picked one, and used her elbow to draw the curtain across. Then she carefully placed the messy satin panties on the floor, and kicked her shoes off. Unzipping her jeans, she pulled them down along with her own panties, and stepped out of them. She was about to pick up the satin panties, when she realized that her shirt (which she had borrowed from her brother) was long enough to cover her buttocks, and would very probably get messy if she kept it on. She undid a couple of buttons, then pulled it up over her head. Underneath she was wearing a little white tank-top that stopped just below her navel.
She picked up the satin panties, and used her fingers to spread the leg-holes wide open so that she could step into them without getting her feet or legs messy. First she lifted her left leg, and slowly guided it into the left leg-hole, silently thanking her gymnastics training for the perfect balance she maintained while standing on her right leg. Then she stepped into the right leg-hole with her right leg, and then very carefully started to pull the panties up both legs, over her knees, and onward up her thighs.
She shuddered as she watched the mess in the panties getting closer and closer to her pussy. Several large turds were heaped on top of each other, forming a pile that started halfway along the gusset and extended almost all the way to the back of the waistband. Another turd, at least an inch and a half in thickness, ran from the base of this lump, forward along the gusset, and ended an inch below the front of the waistband.
Taking a deep breath, Tanya bit the bullet and pulled the panties up the last few inches. The poo connected with her buttocks and pussy simultaneously, and she shivered in disgust. The poo was still slightly warm, and it was sticky, and squishy. But the deed was done. Almost, at least. The waistband was not as high around her hips as it would normally be, because of the thick mass of poo separating her buttocks from the satin material. Taking hold of both sides of the panties, Tanya pulled them up firmly. The poo pressed up between her buttocks, sinking into her cleft and nudging up against her anus. Further forward, the single long turd lying along the gusset oozed between her labia, forcing them apart and squishing against her clitoris and the opening of her vagina.
When she let go with her hands, the panties were still not sitting as high as they should be, but she had already decided that, despite the horrid sensation of the poo pressing into her intimate areas, she quite liked the feel of the material – what little of it was actually touching her skin, at any rate. She would buy them.
But now she had a problem that had not occurred to her before. How was she going to put her other clothes back on without getting any of them messy? If she took the panties off, her buttocks and pussy would be covered in poo, and would get her own panties messy. If she put her jeans on over these panties, the jeans would get messy. In fact her jeans were likely to get messy no matter which panties she wore. She had no choice – she would have to go without her jeans until she got home.
The same went for her shirt – if she was not wearing her jeans, there was no way she would be able to keep her shirt clean. She sighed, and put her shoes back on. At least she would be able to wear those without getting them messy. Gathering up her clothes, she walked out of the cubicle, and immediately shuddered as the poo in her panties started rubbing back and forth against her clitoris. Ugh, that was gross!
Outside the changing rooms, Tracy recoiled as she looked down at Tanya’s bulging panties. “You like them, then?” she inquired, wrinkling her nose.
“Yes, I’ll buy them,” said Tanya. “Along with these others.” She picked up the five cotton pairs from the counter.
“Okay then – but aren’t you going to put some more clothes on?” asked Tracy.
“I don’t want to get them messy,” explained Tanya.
“Oh, I see,” said Tracy, and shrugged.
Attracting plenty of stares and muttered comments along the way, Tanya went to the checkout, where a ginger-haired young man with a rather spotty complexion (Steve, per his name tag) stared at her panties in shock for a moment before swiping the cotton pairs across the scanner.
“And these too,” said Tanya, indicating the panties she was wearing. “Ann said I could have forty percent off because the Phantom Panty-Pooper had taken a dump in them.”
“Oh,” said Steve, his brow furrowing. “I’m not sure how I’m going to swipe those – my handheld scanner isn’t working.”
Tanya grabbed the bar-coded label that was attached to the side of the satin panties, and tried to pull it far enough across the counter so that the scanner could read it. But it was too far away – she could not do it without tearing the panties.
“Perhaps you could take them off for a moment while I scan them?” suggested Steve hopefully.
She gave him a withering look. “I’ll climb up on the counter,” she said. Hoisting herself up with her hands, she brought one knee up on to the counter, and knelt on it while she pulled her other leg up. A man carrying a pair of trousers now arrived at the checkout, and he stared in astonishment at the sight of Tanya’s bulging panties, just a foot or so away from his face.
Tanya lowered her hip, and Steve pulled the label downwards and turned the bar code towards the scanner. The machine bleeped, and Tanya climbed back down.
“That’ll be thirteen pounds seventy five,” said Steve. He scooped up the cotton panties and put them into a polythene bag.
Tanya swiped her debit card. “Can I have a larger bag?” she asked as she punched in her PIN. “I have to put my jeans and shirt in it too.”
Steve gave her a large bag, into which Tanya dropped her jeans, her own panties, and her brother’s shirt, along with the smaller bag containing the cotton panties. She thanked him, popped her card back into her purse, and walked out of the shop. The turd between her labia was rubbing her clitoris very distractingly, and to her disgust she realised that her vagina was getting rather moist.
Clad only in her tank-top, bra, poo-filled panties and shoes, Tanya set off in the direction of the bus stop. Before she had got very far, however, she was feeling decidedly horny. The juices flowing from her vagina were lubricating the turd between her pussy lips, causing it to slide even more freely against her clitoris. Soon she had to slow down, for she was getting perilously close to an orgasm, and she had absolutely no desire to climax in public – particularly when everybody was already staring at her.
“Hey baby,” said one lad in a leather-jacket as he grinned at her panties. “Had a bit of an accident, have you?”
“Go away,” she responded frostily. “For your information it’s not my poo in there.”
“Someone else crapped into your panties?” inquired the young man. “Woah, that’s pretty cool.”
Tanya sped up, to try to leave him behind, but he easily kept pace with her, and soon she was getting very breathless, on the verge of an orgasm. She stopped and leaned against a lamppost.
“I’m Simon,” said the lad.
“Leave me alone, Simon,” she gasped.
“Are you okay?” he asked. “You look a bit flushed.”
“I’m fine!” she said. “Go away.” Then she noticed that she was standing next to Pizza Hut, and she started to hurry inside, then slowed her pace so that the poo rubbed less vigorously against her clitoris. Fortunately Simon did not follow her, and she made a beeline for the toilets.
Inside, she locked herself in one of the stalls, pulled her panties down, and sat down. Reaching between her legs, she rubbed furiously at her clitoris until she was moaning loudly in orgasm. As she came down from her climax, she panted heavily, and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees as she got her breath back.
A minute or so later, having recovered somewhat, she emptied her bladder and wiped herself with toilet paper. It occurred to her that she also badly needed to defecate, but she decided to hold it in for the moment, since she did not want to risk blocking up the toilet here. She stood up, flushed, pulled up her poo-filled panties, and went to wash her hands. As she walked back out of the toilet and through the restaurant towards the door, the turd between her labia began to rub her clitoris again.
By the time she reached the bus stop, which was situated at the edge of a small park, she was very horny again. She was also desperate to empty her bowels. After waiting for a few minutes, during which she tried to ignore a group of younger teens heckling her from behind, she decided that she might as well let it out – her panties already had poo in them, so what difference would it make?
She relaxed her anus, and started to push. Soon a thick poo began to emerge – her eyes began to water, and she grunted with effort. A large lump of poo popped out into her panties, but it was quickly pushed to one side by the ensuing column of softer shit, which curled up and slithered over the surface of the Phantom Panty-Pooper’s poo.
“God, she’s crapping even more in her knickers!” exclaimed a boy behind her.
“Go away and leave me alone!” said Tanya crossly, glancing over her shoulder.
The boys had come over to watch, and were standing a few yards behind her, grinning and staring at her expanding panties. There were four of them: two wore Manchester United t-shirts, and one of the others carried a football, tucked under his left arm. “That’s a huge crap!” said a fair-haired boy with a dusting of freckles on his cheeks.
“Piss off and play with your football,” said Tanya, scowling at them.
“Nah, this is more fun,” said another of the boys.
“Well if that’s true, then it must be because you’re crap at football,” shot back Tanya. “I suppose it must be frustrating.”
A dark-haired boy laughed. “Chaz here is captain of our school team,” he said. “And we’re all on the team, too, except for my little brother here.”
They all looked about thirteen or fourteen, except for one who was maybe just eleven or twelve. “Bet you’re still crap,” said Tanya, still pushing out her poo. Now her panties were sagging dangerously low, being seriously overloaded at the back. “I bet I could run rings around any of you, one on one.”
This was no idle boast – Tanya was herself a keen soccer player and had been captain of the girls’ team until she had relinquished her position in order to concentrate on her A-levels. The boys, however, looked sceptical.
“I’d like to see you try,” said Chaz, dropping the ball on the ground and trapping it with his foot.
Tanya turned around, then she spread her feet apart and grimaced as she pushed out a particularly large, lumpy turd. “Mmmmppphhh!” she said, then panted as she took a little break. “All right,” she said, “let me just finish my poo, then I’ll take you on. First to three goals wins. If I win, you go away and leave me alone. If you win – well, I guess you can go ahead and tease me all you like.”
“We’ve already teased you,” said the dark-haired boy. “How about if Chaz wins, you show us your tits?”
Tanya frowned, then she screwed her face up as she forced out some more poo. “All right,” she said at last, a little breathlessly. “But I need to do something about my panties – they’ll fall down if I leave them like this.”
“You could take them off,” suggested Chaz, grinning.
“Fat chance!” retorted Tanya. “I’ll just rearrange the poo so that it doesn’t weigh down the back so much.”
The boys watched in fascination as Tanya pulled out a couple of large turds from the back of her panties, and dropped them into the front. They craned their necks, hoping for a glimpse of her pussy, but she was too careful. Eventually, with her panties bulging hugely in the front, though not nearly as much as in the back, Tanya stooped down and wiped her hand on the grass. “Okay!” she said.
Chaz led her over to their little pitch between two sets of makeshift goalposts. “First to three!” he said.
Tanya nodded, and strained, pushing out the last of her poo, which remained lodged between her buttocks as she readied herself for Chaz’s approach.
“Come on Chaz!” his friends yelled from the sidelines.
Chaz grinned, and dribbled the ball slowly towards Tanya. Then he flipped it with his toe, so that it took off and sailed past her left knee. Quick as a flash, she jerked her left foot back and out to the side so that it caught the football, deflecting it away slightly. They both darted after it, but Tanya reached it first, and she trapped it beneath her shoe, keeping her back to her opponent.
Chaz found himself staring at Tanya’s massively bulging panties, amazed at how much poo they contained. Her waistband was not even in contact with her skin, and a thick ridge of poo was sticking out of her gap. More poo was holding the elastic around the leg-holes away from her buttocks. He shook himself, and crouched, sticking his leg out to kick the ball out from beneath Tanya’s foot. She was ready for him, however, and rolled it to her left, then flicked it back towards Chaz’s goal. As she hurried after it, the poo in the back of her panties bounced around, slapping against her buttocks with each step, and the thick turd between her labia rubbed vigorously against her clitoris. She stumbled, intense arousal clouding her vision, and Chaz managed to reach the ball first.
He kicked the ball well past her and chased it, forcing her to run after it and him, which drove her almost crazy with horniness. She wanted to kneel down and masturbate for all she was worth. But she also badly wanted to beat Chaz, so she grimly grabbed hold of the sides of her panties, and forced herself to ignore the sensations coursing through her pussy.
Chaz stepped over the ball and kicked it backwards unexpectedly. Tanya, her concentration compromised by her arousal, reacted a moment too late, and before she knew it, Chaz was zipped behind her with the ball, heading straight for her goal. She wheeled around to follow him, but it was too late – he kicked, and scored.
“One nil!” he cried jubilantly as he retrieved the ball. “You’re better than I expected, though – not bad for a girl.”
“Hmm,” said Tanya, coming to a halt. “You were lucky that time. Don’t think you’ll be scoring again.”
Chaz chuckled, and tossed the ball to her. She caught it on her foot, and set it gently down, causing Chaz to raise an eyebrow at her impressive control.
Now she came at him quickly, the ball never more than a few inches from her feet. He blocked her, and she flicked it to her right. He darted left to intercept, and she made as if to kick it further in the same direction. But her left foot missed the ball, landing instead about eighteen inches beyond. With her right foot, she swiped the ball back behind her left, wrong-footing Chaz and causing him to slip on the slightly damp grass.
It was a long shot, but Tanya was confident of her accuracy. She shot, and although Chaz hurried after it, there was no way he could catch it. The ball rolled into his goal, a couple of feet inside his left post. “One all!” said Tanya, smiling.
“An old trick,” said Chaz dismissively.
“Fooled you, though,” replied Tanya, putting her hand between her legs and pressing the Phantom’s turd against her clitoris to relieve her sexual frustration a little. It felt very nice, so she eased it back and forth a little, mashing the poo against and between her labia.
Next he came at her with the same trick he had tried before, although this time he flicked it past her other side. She was amused – was this the extent of his skill? She managed to deflect it again, but this time kept it closer to her, so that she could back-heel it behind her and then cut back inside to shoot it past him as he lashed out wildly with his foot.
He kicked her ankle, and she yelped. “Play the fucking ball!” she snapped angrily as she limped after the ball. The pain had taken her mind off her arousal, at least, and as Chaz caught up to her, she flipped the ball up and over his flailing left leg. As it landed, she was perfectly positioned to shoot. This time the ball almost perfectly bisected the goal mouth as it sailed though. “Two-one,” she said.
“Come on Chaz!” yelled his fair-haired friend. “You going to let a girl beat you?”
“Fuck no!” said Chaz, annoyed, as he placed the ball in the centre of the pitch once more. But he looked more than a little nervous as he dribbled it towards her. This time, he did not take any chances. He kicked the ball past her, too wide for her to reach it, and then he ran hard after it. Tanya ran too, but she knew she could not get to it before him, so she settled for interposing herself between the ball and her goal. Even so, it was a long run, and the poo sliding rapidly and rhythmically over her clitoris soon brought her close to a climax. She forced herself to calm down – it would be too horribly embarrassing to have an orgasm in front of these bratty little boys – but it was very difficult to concentrate on the game when such delightful sensations were surging through her loins.
Chaz, having regained control over the ball, now approached her once more. His angle on the goal was shallow – he would have to bring it around further in front in order to be confident of scoring with a clear shot. He brought the ball out away from the goal line as he moved in front of the goal, getting into a perfect position.
Tanya did not allow him to take his time over this, however, coming out to harry him as he dribbled the ball across in front of her. Put on the defensive, he turned his back to her, trying to get her to come around one side of him or the other, so that he could switch the other way and get himself a scoring opportunity.
But Tanya was not that stupid, and instead feinted to the left, hoping he would turn the other way and give her an opportunity to take the ball back. Indeed he started to turn that way, but she came back too soon and he realised what she was doing. He awkwardly slewed the ball back over his left foot, harder than he intended, so that he had to run after it.
Tanya now found herself wrong-footed, and as she planted her right leg and launched herself back to the left, her legs spread wide apart, and a chunk of poo fell out of the left leg-hole of her panties. She was momentarily distracted, but decided to leave the poo where it fell, and chased after Chaz instead.
He got to the ball first, and shot for goal. It was a wild kick, and he struck the ball a glancing blow, but by good fortune this compensated for his poor aim, and the ball trickled into goal just a few inches from the post. He whooped, and clapped his hands. “Two all!” he said.
Sighing with resignation, Tanya went to retrieve the fallen poo. Picking it up, she tucked it into the front of her panties, and then headed back behind her goal for the ball. It was a long walk to the centre of the pitch, and her pussy was tingling with excitement as she kicked off for the last time. This time she tried using Chaz’s trick against him – but with a twist. Having flicked the ball up to go past his right knee, she kicked up with her left foot, catching the ball and sending it in the other direction. It sailed up over Chaz’s head, and Tanya sprinted past his left-hand-side to catch it before it landed.
Again the Phantom’s turd rubbed frantically against her clitoris, and her vision blurred as she approached her orgasm. But somehow she managed to catch the ball with her upper chest, and as it dropped to her feet, she shot for Chaz’s goal with deadly accuracy.
“Three-two!” cried the fair-haired boy. “She beat you, Chaz!”
“Fuck!” said Chaz.
Tanya was on her knees, shaking with orgasm as she squished poo against her clitoris with her fingers pressed to her panties. She did not care that the boys were watching – and as they laughed and jeered at her, she heard only the blood roaring in her ears. She moaned ecstatically, shuddering as the heavenly electricity pulsed through her. Eventually, she collapsed on to her elbows, panting breathlessly as one of Chaz’s friends took photos from behind her with his camera phone.
“Well that was pretty hot,” said Chaz a minute later as he helped her to her feet. “All that shit must be rubbing you pretty nicely, yeah?”
Tanya blushed, and nodded. “Hard to play with that going on,” she said.
“And you still beat me,” said Chaz ruefully. “You’re pretty good, you know that?”
Tanya smiled. “Yes, I suppose I’m not bad. I was captain of our school’s girls’ team until recently.”
“Well how about you and me take on the rest of these losers?” asked Chaz, grinning impishly.
“Hey!” said the dark-haired boy. “Who are you calling losers?”
Tanya chuckled, and thought for a moment. “Oh, what the hell,” she said as she tugged her panties up so that her poo nestled snugly against her pussy and buttocks. “Why not?”